Almost Never

by Amy Lamont

  "Don't worry," he'd leaned down and whispered in her ear. "You'll be fine. I promise." He gave her hand one last squeeze and before she could protest, he'd turned and moved towards the photographer.

  That was just about fifteen minutes ago, and things had gone downhill from there. Well, except for the food. She dipped a chilled shrimp into the cocktail sauce on her plate and crunched it between her front teeth. Her eyes closed and she repressed a small moan. Might be worth attending more of these just for the food.

  Although, the company left a lot to be desired.

  Her gaze slid around the room. Since Declan stepped away from her she hadn't exchanged more than two words with anyone. The only person she’d spoken to was the man behind the buffet table slicing roast beef who asked her if she preferred rare or well done. With her plate full of delicious nibbles, she'd strolled around a bit, determined not to let Declan's absence prevent her from chatting up a the professors she was hoping to impress.

  But as she moved around, she hadn't been able to make eye contact with anyone. At least not anyone she wanted to make eye contact with. She had noticed a couple of the sorority girls huddled in one spot giving her the stink eye.

  But no matter how many pep talks she gave herself, she couldn't quite push her way into a circle of professors to make small talk. What on earth would she even talk to them about?

  So now she found herself stuck in a corner, feeling like the outsider looking in at all the pretty people. She'd watched Declan have his picture taken with a few members of the faculty. He'd glanced around a few times, but he didn't seem to be in any hurry to come find her. She sighed as she popped her last shrimp into her mouth, and stepped forward to drop her plate on the tray of a passing waiter.

  The first fifteen minutes of the party had gone just as Declan predicted. The last fifteen minutes, while not quite the horror show she'd been expecting, had not been at all helpful.

  She sighed and gave one long last look around. When had Professor Costa arrived? He stood over by Declan, and as she watched, she saw Declan close the distance between himself and the professor. They shook hands and talked, and after about a minute, Declan threw his head back and laughed. Not once did he scan the party for her.

  Guess the old saying is true--out of sight, out of mind. She'd have thought talking to Professor Costa would jiggle his memory and remind him of her presence here. But apparently it would take more than that.

  Two women approached the men. She'd seen them around campus before. They were sorority girls, a year or two behind her. Her eyes narrowed as the little group stood chatting, comfortable as old friends. A fist seized her stomach. Why did she think for even a second she'd ever be more than an outsider on this campus? If one of those blondes had stood by Declan's side when the dean approached, would he have pushed them out of the way or tugged them to join him in the pictures?

  Damn. That's not why she came. How could she keep forgetting the point of all this? Who gave a shit if Declan included her in a photo op or not? But he damn well should have called her over once he started talking to Professor Costa.

  Should she go insert herself into their conversation? The contents of her stomach roiled and coiled at the thought of how Declan and the sorority chicks would react to her presence. What if he turned on her, not wanting those girls to think he was in any way connected to Harper? He could make her look like an ass in front of Professor Costa. And then where would she be?

  With a huff, she turned toward the door, more than ready to be done with this party. Her heel caught in the rug under her feet and once again she was stumbling. This time Declan didn't save her. But someone's hand reached out and held her steady.

  "That's why I never wear heels to these things. They're hard enough to walk on in the best of circumstances. Put them on these old, snaggy rugs and it’s a wonder everyone isn’t ass over teacup.”

  Harper looked up. Her rescuer turned out to be Professor Flaherty. Harper had taken Organic Chemistry with her.

  Harper got her balance. "Th-thanks."

  "No problem."

  Once Harper was steady on her feet, her professor let go of her arm. Harper wracked her brain for something to say. Here was the perfect chance to make small talk with someone in her field. Professor Flaherty had a stellar reputation on campus and in the academic community. A recommendation could go a long way in getting Professor Costa to give her the time of day.

  Harper was once again tongue-tied. She couldn't think of a single, solitary thing to say.

  But apparently Professor Flaherty wasn't done coming to her rescue. "You took Chemistry with me, didn't you?"

  Harper nodded, her chest flooding with warm gratitude that this woman had kept her from her second almost-header of the day and was now throwing her a lifeline. "Yes, I took Intro with you in my freshman year and Organic Chem last semester."

  "I thought you looked familiar. You're the one who aced my final, aren't you?"

  Yes! Finally someone who noticed her hard work. "Yes, I ended up with an A on that one."

  "I think that's the first A I've given in the class in a couple of years."

  Harper grinned, thrilled to her toes. Now why couldn't Professor Flaherty be in charge of the mentor program. She seemed to think Harper was a standout. "I really enjoyed that class."

  Professor Flaherty had been checking out the rest of the party, but at Harper's words, her gaze flew to Harper's face. "Seriously? Now no need to kiss up. You already aced the class."

  "No, I swear." She held her hands out in front of her and gave a self-depricating shrug. "I guess I'm a science nerd. All the classes people complain about the most seem to be the ones I like the best."

  "You should take Genetics with Professor Costa."

  Harper laughed. "Actually, I'm taking that one now."

  Professor Flaherty lifted a single eyebrow. "And? How's that going?"

  She shrugged again. "About the same as Organic Chemistry. It's tough, but I'm managing to maintain an A."

  "Impressive. Tell me, what are your plans after you graduate?"

  "I'm going to medical school." Harper bit her lip and waited. She always dreaded the reaction she'd get when she announced that.

  "Good choice with those grades. Is it safe to assume you're doing Professor Costa's med school track program?"

  "Um, that's actually why..well." Harper twisted her hands in front of her. She wasn't ready to tell the woman standing in front of her she wasn't being considered for the program. But she didn't want to outright lie and tell her she was planning on doing it.

  "Ah," Professor Flaherty said after a minute. The woman's gaze searched the party and zeroed in on Professor Costa and Declan. "Is it safe to assume Frank hasn't chosen you for the program yet?"

  Harper let out the breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding. "That would definitely be safe to assume."

  Professor Flaherty's eyes came back to Harper and the woman's sharp gaze pinned her to her spot. "If you want my advice....?

  Harper nodded, her hands grasping each other tightly. She clenched her teeth together to keep from begging her professor for any scrap of advice or anything else that might help her get into the program.

  "Don't give up."

  Harper's shoulders sagged. That was the advice? Not that she wasn't grateful, but once again she'd been hoping for explicit instructions on how to get herself into Professor Costa's good graces. "Thanks. That's pretty much my plan right now."

  "Good." Professor Flaherty's narrow-eyed gaze landed once again on Declan and Professor Costa. "And in the meantime, maybe a little birdy can whisper in Frank's ear."

  Harper looked away from the men on the other side of the room, her gaze flying to meet Professor Flaherty's. "Are you saying...?"

  Professor Flaherty shrugged. "You're an excellent student. I don't mind helping if I can."

  "Thank you." Her hand went to her chest. "Thank you so much."

  "Don't thank me," Professor Flaherty said. "You earned it."


  Harper could feel the grin tilt her lips up and hoped she didn't look as silly as she felt. For the first time in over two years, someone recognized just how hard she worked. She felt like turning cartwheels. "You may not want my thanks, but I can't tell you how much I appreciate it."

  Professor Flaherty offered a warm smile and then gestured to the people spread around the room. "Well, I better go mingle. If we don't raise enough funds, I won't keep my tenure."

  Harper laughed and waved as the woman strolled off. She raised her eyes, the smile still tipping up her lips, only to meet Declan's stare. He still stood with Professor Costa, but a glance told her the two sorority girls had moved on. He smiled at her and inclined his head in invitation.

  The smile slipped from her face. Now he was ready for her? That's not the way this was going to work. She narrowed her eyes at him and then twisted around, managing to keep both feet under her this time. She headed straight for the door. At least she ended things on a positive note. Professor Flaherty was going to recommend her to Professor Costa. And now all she had to do was remember that she and Declan weren't friends. Or anything else for that matter. If he wanted to ditch her for photo ops and other women, he was free to. As long as he kept up his end of the bargain.

  Her heels clattered on the cobblestone as she stomped down the path. Her anger propelled her forward this time without mishap.

  "Harper!"

  Declan's voice fueled her anger even more. Now he remembered her? Now that she’d had enough of being ignored and found her own way to get on Professor Costa's radar? Tough. She wasn't ready to talk to him yet.

  "Harper, wait up!"

  She continued her forward march out into the quad, stopping only when Declan's hand landed on her arm and yanked her around to face him. She fell into him, her body pressed against his.

  For a brief moment all she could register was the heat of his body seeping into hers, his long length touching every inch of her from chest to knees. He gave her his smirky grin and that was enough to snap her out of the spell getting too close to him seemed to put her under. She stomped backwards, pushing hard against his chest.

  He took two steps back. "What the hell, Harper?"

  She plunked her hands on her hips. "That's what I want to know. What the hell, Declan? You're supposed to be helping me and you ditch me the first chance you get."

  "What...? No, no, that's not what that was about at all."

  "Oh really, because last I looked, I was standing in a corner by myself while you flirted with two blondes and chatted up the professor you brought me there to talk to."

  He shook his head and took a step forward. "That's not what I did."

  She put a hand up in front of her to keep him from moving any closer. "Oh, I'm sorry. Did I read you ditching me all wrong?"

  "Yeah," he said quietly, "you did." He took another step closer. "If you just give me a minute to explain, I promise, that back there had nothing to do with me ditching you."

  Harper crossed her arms over her chest. Her voice came softer, but with no less anger. "No, you just couldn't stand the thought of having a picture with me, out where anyone and everyone could see it."

  A sharp, hard knot lodged in her chest and it took all her strength to keep from hugging her arms around herself. She wouldn't give him the satisfaction of seeing how much he hurt her.

  "Well, yeah, I didn't want you to have your picture taken with me."

  A crushing weight pushed down on her. She wanted nothing more than to crumple to the ground. This moment, his words. They hurt more than all the taunts and barbs she'd had thrown at her in high school combined. Hurt more than the moment he'd left her standing in that dank basement and turned away from her.

  "Not for the reason you're thinking." He closed the space between them and snatched up her hands in his.

  She tried to pull them away, furious and fighting off the tears stinging the back of her eyes. "Let. Me. Go."

  "No." He tucked her hands under his arms and released them so he could move his arms up and around her, pulling her closer. "I'm not letting you go until you hear what I have to say."

  She looked down and then glanced around the quad. Thank goodness it was fairly quiet, but it didn't mean the people around weren't all staring at them, speculating about why Declan Cooper had his arms wrapped around that little nobody.

  She faced him with a glare and stopped struggling to get away. "Fine. Explain."

  "I didn't want you in the picture."

  She struggled against him, but he just held her closer.

  "It wasn't because I didn't want to be seen with you, Harper. I-I didn't want you to be seen with me."

  She shook her head and tried yet again to wiggle out of his arms. "That just clears it right up. Thanks. You can let me go now."

  He gave her a small shake and huffed out a breath. "No. Really listen. I didn't want you to be seen with me."

  Something about the way he enunciated each word made her still. She tilted her face toward him and allowed her eyes to rake over his face. What was he trying to tell her? His words repeated in her head. The conclusion she drew made her wrinkle her nose. "You think I wouldn't want to be in a picture with you."

  He loosened his hold on her but didn't let go. His gaze moved to a point over her shoulder. "You shouldn't want to be in a picture with me, Harper. Sometimes even the photos from the school paper get picked up by the larger newspapers and media outlets."

  She shook her head, completely baffled. "I'm missing something. Help me out here, Declan."

  His eyes came back to meet hers. "I know you don't. I'm glad you don't understand."

  "Now you're just talking in riddles. Are you trying to buy some time while you come up with an excuse?" She pushed against his arms, this time breaking his hold on her. "Don't worry about it. Consider yourself off the hook. You can keep helping me with my project. I'll help you with your experiment. And you don't owe me any explanations."

  He stared at her for a long moment before sighing and rubbing a hand over his short hair. She didn't notice for even a second how adorably rumpled he looked with his hair sticking out in wayward spikes like a small boy just waking from a nap. Nope, not for a minute.

  "I want to explain. Please just let's talk." He pointed to a coffee cart in the corner. "Let me buy you a cup of coffee. We can sit down and talk. Just give me a few more minutes. I swear I can explain."

  She was so afraid to believe him. To give him the benefit of the doubt. She'd never admit it out loud, and the thought just about crushed her, but for some reason the guy standing in front of her had the power to crush her in a way nobody ever had before. Not Caitlin with her catty comments and rumors. Not her aunt with her hate-spewing rants. Just this one guy.

  But the same thing that made her want to run in the opposite direction to avoid the high potential for pain, also made her want with everything inside her to stay. To listen to what he had to say.

  She narrowed her eyes on him. "Make it a mocha latte and I'll give you ten minutes."

  A slow, sincere smile, no smirk in sight, formed on his too-handsome face. "Deal."

  Chapter 6

  "You don't really know what my life is like," Declan said.

  They were settled at a little wrought iron table on the side of the music building. She was surprised they were the only ones there. It seemed like the perfect spot to bask in the unseasonably warm October sunshine.

  "Okay," she said, "so what's your life like?"

  "I'm usually pretty insulated here. Reporters can't come on school grounds and everyone's more or less used to me being here." His lips twisted into a cynical smile. "Or at least they pretend not to care."

  "O-kay. Still not seeing what you're getting at."

  He took a long pull from his steaming black coffee. "Off campus, my life is different. I'm the son of a rock star."

  "I know who your dad is, Declan," Duh, everyone knew who his dad was. As she had the thought, she started to see what he w
as getting at. "You mean you're famous, too. Famous for being the rock star's son.

  "Not just any rock star. Sean Cooper, the guy notorious for hard music and hard living. My whole life has been lived under a microscope. And it's gotten even worse since I turned eighteen." He shrugged. "Since then it's like everyone is waiting to see if I'll follow in his footsteps. See if I'll turn into….”

  "Your dad?" She asked softly.

  He tilted his head toward her. "Yeah."

  "Okay. I get that. But I still don't get what that has to do with having your picture taken with me."

  "The paparazzi is relentless. All it would take is for one of them to get a hold of you in a picture with me, and they'd be all over you, wanting to know every last detail of your life."

  Harper cringed at the picture he painted. The last thing, the very last thing she wanted or needed was a bunch of reporters digging for dirt on her. She'd been featured in the newspaper once as a kid as the poor orphaned daughter of a police officer killed in the line of duty. Somehow, knowing anyone who gave out information about her now would be passing on the worst of the gossip that had circulated about her through high school and college, she didn't think the press would put her in such a favorable light this time around.

  Her heart stuttered in her chest. With clarity came the weight of knowing what it would mean exactly to be photographed on Declan's arm. She could only imagine what her life would be like if her relationship with Declan became national news. Medical schools probably wouldn't be beating down her door once she was portrayed as the gold-digging companion to the wild child son of Sean Cooper.

  That meant she and Declan could never have a relationship. That thought made it hard to breath.

  "But, I mean, we're already..." She gestured back and forth between them. "Together a lot. What if someone leaks that to the press?"

  He shot a wry smile her way. "I don't think you need to worry. Right now we're just schoolmates working on a project together. My father's publicist could handle any unfounded rumors as long as we keep things low key."

  She nodded and again found herself fighting off tears. She looked away, not really focusing on anything, as she blinked back the moisture in her eyes. Why was she being so ridiculous? It's not like he had shown much of an interest in her. Why was she having such a hard time dealing with the idea that she and Declan Cooper could never have more of a relationship than they had right now at this moment?