by Val Daniels
He stood up. “We’ll both live our own lives, but I would appreciate it if we publicly try to look like we have a normal marriage,” he added.
“I won’t be pitied or ridiculed,” she said without thinking.
He raised one brow questioningly.
“I don’t care what you do, or who you do it with, but if we are to appear to be the happy couple,” she couldn’t keep the bitterness out of her voice, “I think it would be a good idea if you go somewhere besides Providence to do your tom-catting around.”
He jammed his clenched fist into his pocket, then turned and strode from the room.
The wedding was a small simple affair in the quiet little church Dan had belonged to all his life, so different from the plans they’d just begun to make before the “incident”, which is what she’d come to call his liaison with his receptionist. She wished she had the nerve to ask him to get rid of her, but she’d asked for so much already, and gotten everything she wanted.
Shawn had drawn up a marriage contract. The only agreement she’d been asked to make was to not try to get any part of the private hospital and his clinic, which was attached to it, should they divorce.
Her requests were granted to the letter, except the part about their physical relationship. She couldn’t bear the indignity of asking Dan not to touch her in writing when he obviously wasn’t interested in trying. If he’d been satisfied with that part of their relationship, he wouldn’t have needed his receptionist’s favors, now would he?
Still, as he stood across from her exchanging vows, he looked at her hungrily. And more than once in the past two weeks while they’d prepared for this travesty, his hand had lingered longer than necessary on her arm as he helped her with her coat. The evening two nights ago, when he’d moved her into his house and moved himself out, he’d kissed her as he’d left for the night.
“Sorry,” he had said. “Force of habit, I guess.” And she’d agreed, because out of the very same ridiculous habit, she’d tilted her head up to receive the kiss as she stood by the door bidding him goodbye. Then she’d cried herself to sleep thinking about how marriage to Dan could have been.
She felt a quiver in her flat stomach, like a butterfly spreading its wings. Dan lifted her hand and slipped the simple band which matched her engagement ring over her third finger. “And now I pronounce you husband and wife,” the minister finished the traditional ceremony.
It was over, except the kiss, which Dan seemed intent on making look “real.” Thank goodness, the numbness was still there. She forced herself to respond in the appropriate way, but kept mundane thoughts—like getting through the next few hours with her sanity—to the forefront of her mind. Then Brad and Cindy were beside her, congratulating Dan, wishing her luck, and she knew she’d need it because like a delayed reaction, her heart thudded the way it always did when Dan held her.
Brad didn’t smile as he took Dan’s proffered hand. “You’d better be darn sure you take care of my little sister,” he threatened seriously in a low, gruff voice, “or you won’t like having a brother as much as you think you might,” he answered in response to Dan’s comment that he’d always wanted a brother.
Mrs. Bridges and Melanie, Dan’s sister, joined their circle then. Mrs. Bridges placed a soft kiss on Alicia’s cheek. She still had tears in her eyes. “They’re happy tears, my dear,” she whispered. Although she knew about the baby, she believed they’d patched up the “little tiff” that had broken their engagement. She sniffed twice. “I wish I could have talked you and my stubborn son into waiting four more weeks and having the big wedding. Since we already had the invitations, we—”
“No use crying over spilled milk, Mother,” Dan inserted smoothly. “Or redesigned weddings,” he added lightly.
“But since everyone knew about the baby,” Mrs. Bridges paused, “what difference would it have made? This hole-in-the-wall affair makes it all seem shoddy.”
Dan cast Alicia a look. “I think we’d better move on to the Greentree,” he said, pulling her closer into the circle of his arm. “Shawn insisted that since he couldn’t come to the wedding, he was going to provide the reception. Shall we go?”
As they piled into the three cars lining the church entrance, Dan watched her, trying to judge her energy, Alicia assumed at his next words. “Think you can make it for a few more hours?”
“I feel fine,” Alicia said, carefully ignoring his concern, “just tired.” They’d set the time of the wedding for four o‘clock in the afternoon to avoid the morning sickness that lasted most of the day. Since she’d left the hospital, the earliest she’d been able to walk and talk like a human was two o’clock. Dr. Bill had given her a prescription that should have alleviated the nausea, but so far, she wasn’t impressed.
“You’ve got big blue rings under your eyes,” he commented. “We can skip this all. I’m sure everyone would understand.”
She brightened. “Why don’t you take me back to the house and the rest of you go ahead? Shawn would be so disappointed if he couldn’t do this for you.”
“That would look really loverlike.” The muscle in his jaw became sharply defined. “Probably make the Providence Record as part of the wedding announcement.” One hand left the steering wheel and he outlined the headline in the air by the windshield. “Reception Enjoyed By All—Except The Bride.”
He shook his head and heaved a long sigh. “If you don’t feel up to it, just say so. I’ll take you home.”
The tension between them grew and she admitted she didn’t want to put on a pretend face any longer. She felt emotionally drained just wondering how they could live in the same house for even the next seven months, let alone up to two years, as specified in the agreement. Shawn had pointed out that if they stayed together that long, they should renegotiate it or let it fade into obscurity. It would probably no longer be applicable.
Dan turned in the isolated car to meet her eyes. One hand came to rest on her nutmeg-colored hair. “We don’t have to do anything we don’t want to,” he said softly.
It was her undoing. Her face crumpled and she hid behind the hand that wore the newly acquired wedding band. “We just did,” she whispered brokenly.
CHAPTER THREE
THE long, low house rested easy in the autumn sun, its white bricks gleaming, accepting shadowed accents from the colorful shade trees which seemed to protect it. It looked inviting and warm. Alicia started up the asphalt drive that circled through the long front yard. She ought to hurry, she supposed—with Dan’s mother and sister coming for dinner, she still had several things she wanted to do before they arrived—but her daily walk was becoming addictive and she hated to end it.
She didn’t notice Dan’s burgundy Porsche behind her until he honked. What a classic newlywed couple we must look, she thought as she turned and waved, then retreated to the edge of the yellow-green lawn so he could drive in. She glanced around at the neighbors’ houses, wondering if any of them were watching, waiting to see if he would drop a kiss on her forehead. He unfolded his long legs and leaned against the door of the car, ankles crossed, arms folded across his broad chest, waiting for her.
“Did you have a nice walk?” he asked as she joined him and they moved toward the front door together.
She nodded and felt her hair swing against her shoulders. “I hate to end it, but I think if your mother and Melanie are going to be here in an hour...” She let a shrug finish the sentence.
“Do you need help with anything?”
She consulted her watch. “Would you put the appetizers in the oven in about fifteen minutes? I’m going to take a shower, then I’ll finish everything while you get ready.”
They stood inside the front door framed by a tunnel of sunlight playing across the Spanish tiles. “How did it go today?” he asked, referring to the daily bout of morning sickness.
She was getting used to his concern and smiled, thankful that he’d given up his habit of absently touching her when they talked. She could stand almost a
nything but that. “I felt fine by eleven-thirty this morning. It’s getting shorter and shorter.”
“Good.” He nodded approvingly as if she’d actually had an effect on the outcome.
“Bill said it wouldn’t last forever,” she commented, starting down the hall that led to her wing of the house.
“It didn’t bother you while you made the lasagne?”
“No,” she answered over her shoulder, wondering if his nerves were doing the same as hers at the prospect of their first dinner guests. Tonight they couldn’t sit in opposite ends of the house, reading or watching TV. She’d know if he was called to the hospital. She never heard his beeper from her end of the house, so the one evening she’d gone looking for him, she’d found a note saying he was at the hospital.
Tonight, they’d have to exchange small talk, look like they knew what the other had done with their day. Since the day he brought her directly home after the wedding and called Shawn to plead “sick wife,” the only things they had shared were evening meals. That is what you told him you wanted, she chided herself as she stepped under the pleasantly steamy shower. She scanned her bare form, noting that her breasts seemed even fuller today. She hoped that wouldn’t keep up at the current pace. She’d look like a cow in another month. She’d noticed Dan’s eyes on her breasts as they’d talked a few minutes before. He’d said they were perfect before. She closed her eyes and wondered when she would quit dividing time into “before” Maggie and “after.” She stuck her head under the spray, deciding to wash her hair after all. She was fortunate enough to have straight, thick hair that didn’t need much besides a few minutes with the blow-dryer and the ends smoothed under with the curling iron. Maybe she could wash the Maggie-Dan picture out of her mind.
“Dan?” she called as she rubbed her body vigorously with the plush beige towel she yanked from the rack. When he answered in seconds, right outside the bathroom door, she jumped.
“Are you all right?” he asked, turning the handle. His concerned face appeared around the edge of the door as she gripped the towel in front of her, blushing furiously.
She nodded, stammering, “I just wanted to tell you to go ahead and get ready if it will be okay to finish things up after they get here.”
“That’ll be fine.” He didn’t turn to go, but stood staring at her bare legs beneath the loose end of the towel. She cleared her throat.
“Oh, sorry,” he said absently, then looked into the mirror behind her. Her eyes followed his. He had an excellent view of her naked back, and enough of a side angle to see the gentle curve of her breast beneath her outstretched arm. Her breath came in shallow gulps as his eyes slid down the length of her, lingering on the narrow white lines showing where her bikini had covered her when she had sunned last summer.
Their gaze met in the mirror and locked. His lips parted slightly and he sucked in a long, steadying breath. “You are still very beautiful,” he said huskily, as if it had been years since he’d seen her. He clenched the fist at his side. “This is like a glimpse of pure heaven from the depths of hell.”
The door shut quietly but firmly behind him and she didn’t move until she heard his footsteps echoing silently on the hard tiles of the passageway which divided this wing from the rest of the house.
She heard the bell chime as she was putting the finishing touches on her makeup. Dan opened the door and greeted his mother as she entered the foyer of the U-shaped house. Since his mother didn’t suspect that their marriage was built on anything but love, Alicia slipped her hand inside Dan’s and leaned forward to accept Mrs. Bridges’s kiss. “You look lovely, Mrs. Bridges,” she said as their cheeks brushed. “I’m sorry, but I stayed in the shower too long, and I’m afraid dinner is going to be a bit late.”
“Please.” Mrs. Bridges caught the hand Alicia extended to accept her coat and held it. “Call me Mother.” She must have noted Alicia’s uneasy frown because she added, “Or at least, Laura.”
“Of course, Laura.” Alicia smiled. “And you must call me Mrs. Bridges.” His mother laughed and Alicia relaxed. Dan hung his mother’s jacket in the small closet, then led them to the living room.
“Where’s Melanie?” Alicia asked as Laura sat down. Dan poured her a drink from the bar at the side of the long room.
“I was just telling Dan, she’ll be along in a little while, so I’m glad you’re running a little behind. She’s bringing her car. The school scheduled play tryouts for tonight. She hoped to be one of the first to audition.” Laura spread her hands. “I was dreading having to ask you to wait dinner on her, especially since this is our first real get-together as a family,” she said apologetically. “But if she isn’t here in another half hour, we won’t wait for her.”
“It’s no problem, Mom,” Dan said. “It’s nice to have a few minutes with both of you. Alicia and I barely get the chance to speak in the evenings, it seems.” He eyed her and Alicia squirmed uncomfortably. He was obviously going to use the fact that they had guests to make a point or two.
Laura sighed deeply. “It’s the same way at home. Melanie’s so busy lately, I can’t keep up with her.” She added with a frown, “And now with you married—”
“You’re not supposed to keep up with her, Mom. You need to find something besides her to keep you busy,” Dan interrupted, then offered to get Alicia a glass of milk, effectively changing the subject.
She declined, wrinkling her nose. “I’m sick of it already.”
Laura sympathized. “There are definite disadvantages to marrying a doctor. I should have warned you. Have you had the joy of being wakened in the night for an emergency when he’s already at the hospital?”
Alicia shook her head.
“Alicia’s sleeping in the other wing right now. We unplug her extension at night,” Dan said smoothly. “I thought she needed plenty of rest since she’s been so sick.”
Alicia intercepted Laura’s look of concern and added a word of reassurance. “Just morning sickness. Everyone tells me it will pass.” One hurdle crossed, Alicia thought. She had wondered how Hannah, the lady that came twice a week and cleaned the house, was treating the subject of their separate sleeping arrangements. From what she’d heard about Dan’s mother, Alicia guessed that Laura would take care of any gossip on the subject and was sure that had been Dan’s intention.
Laura nodded understandingly. “Are you feeling any better?”
“Much. If I take a package of saltines to bed with me and munch a couple first thing in the morning, it doesn’t seem to be as bad. This morning, I felt pretty good by noon.”
“The medicine Bill gave you would do the same thing if you’d take it.” Dan looked exasperated with their conversation.
Laura laughed, covering Dan’s hand with hers. “Stay out of this dear, you’re only the father, and being a doctor just complicates things. Despite what they told you at medical school, you just don’t know what you’re talking about unless you’ve been pregnant.”
Alicia heard a car pull up outside and rose. “It sounds like Melanie is here. I’ll go put the lasagne back in the oven and we should be ready to eat in twenty minutes.”
When she returned carrying the tray of appetizers she’d taken from the oven, Dan threw her a studied frown that warned her to prepare for a surprise.
His seventeen year old sister bounced into the room, her dark hair wild, her eyes merry. “Look who I found on our doorstep,” she said, moving to the side to urge someone forward. “It’s a good thing I stopped by the house before I came over. Maggie’s feeling kind’a low this evening.”
Alicia immediately closed her gaping mouth, forcefully replacing the stunned look with one of nonconcern.
“I hope you don’t mind, Alicia.” Melanie grimaced as if she’d just realized she didn’t know her new sisterin-law very well. “I asked her to have dinner with us. After all, she’s practically family.” Her expression reminded Alicia of a puppy, tentatively approaching and not sure whether it should wag its tail.
“It’s not a problem, Melanie.” Melanie rewarded her with a wide smile.
“I’m sorry, Alicia,” Dan said in a low voice as he helped her set another place at the table that had been his great-grandmother’s. “This has been Melanie’s second home since she was a baby. She feels as comfortable bringing Maggie here as she would home. I’ll have a talk with her later.”
“That won’t be necessary,” Alicia whispered, “she’s welcome to bring anyone here that she likes.” After all, it’s your house. I’m just visiting.
She’d always wanted to serve dinner to her husband’s mistress, she thought ruefully as everyone took their places.
Dan sat at the head of the rectangular table with Alicia facing him at the other end. Laura and Maggie sat down at either of his sides, and Melanie slipped in between Maggie and Alicia.
Alicia warily watched Maggie as the food was passed. While she was “just” Dan’s receptionist, Alicia hadn’t paid much attention to Maggie, but since the “incident,” Alicia had learned that Maggie had been the girl-next-door since babyhood. She looked the part right down to the spattering of freckles across her upturned nose. She wore her hair long and loose, and frequently pushed it back over one ear with her finger.
Maggie had also been Dan’s high school sweetheart. She still looked very much like the senior picture Alicia had seen in his yearbook. There had also been one of them exchanging a kiss as they were crowned “King and Queen of Courts” that year. And if things were normal, Alicia was sure she would have eventually asked Dan, in the natural course of things, why Maggie had married someone else while he was in medical school.
Now, as Melanie asked mysterious questions about Maggie’s legal affairs, Maggie turned to Alicia and explained quietly, “Jeff recently asked me for a divorce.”
Alicia felt Dan watching her intently as that tidbit of information sunk in. Her husband found out about Maggie’s affair with Dan, Alicia thought, a fresh knife of understanding stabbing her. Her fork in midair, she turned away from his stare and looked at Maggie, whose wide, brown eyes lowered. Her deep auburn hair swung forward to curtain her face as she slowly pushed the lasagne Alicia had slaved over around her plate.
