by David Horne
“Harry please,” the words sounded strangled. “Please.”
Harry didn’t reply, just continued pushing forward, taking Alex into his mouth. It was hot, wet, and fuck, Alex had never felt anything like it. He wanted to thrust forward and it was taking every ounce of willpower he possessed to keep still. His legs were trembling with the effort, aware that his grip on Harry’s hair had to be hurting him. Harry didn’t seem to mind, just hollowed his cheeks and hummed low in his throat.
Vibrations.
Alex hunched forward, trying to say Harry’s name, tell him that he couldn’t do this, it was too much, and wanting more all the same. All that came out were garbled words, and Harry pulled back, tonguing the slit of Alex’s dick.
Without warning, Alex was cumming, whole body trembling with the surge of emotion, the pleasure tingling down his spine.
“Sorry,” he said, as soon as he gained control of himself. “Sorry, sorry.”
Harry was staring up at him, impressed, and he was rubbing a hand against Alex’s calf. “It’s all right, Alex.”
“Fuck.” Alex slid down to his knees, dropping his head to Harry’s shoulder. “I—”
A kiss was pressed against Alex’s shoulder as Harry rested a hand on the back of his head, stroking his hair gently. “Was it all right?”
“It was a lot,” Alex admitted, closing his eyes. His body was taut, his dick stirring against his thigh as if ready to go again. Alex wasn’t sure he could take another emotional overload and sighed. “I want more,” he admitted, reaching down to palm his dick. “But I don’t think I can.” Harry’s laugh was soft. “We don’t have to do anything. It’s understandable to want more, but that doesn’t have to be today.”
Alex frowned, staring down at Harry, who was hard in his jeans. “Don’t you want me to do that to you?”
“No.” Harry seemed content enough to kneel here with Alex for the moment. “As long as you’re happy.”
“I am,” Alex said honestly. “I really am.”
Chapter Twelve
Alex woke slowly. The room around him was dark, the bed unfamiliar. There was someone lying on his chest, hair tickling his chin and he immediately brought his hand up, wrapping it around Harry’s shoulders. It was still dark, no hint of light poking through the curtains, but Alex didn’t want to move enough to see what time it was.
Harry was dead to the world, eyes closed, fingers twitching against Alex’s stomach. Last night had been perfect; Alex’s dick gave a half-hearted twitch at the memory, but he glared down at it, feeling like an idiot as he did so. Thankfully his dick made no more attempts at stirring and he closed his eyes, content in the feel of Harry on his chest, and the previous night's memories.
For Alex’s first time, and even if they hadn’t gone any further than a blowjob, Alex still counted it as such—had been amazing. It felt too precious a memory to share, and Alex was sure he wouldn’t, even with his siblings and Sara begging in his ear.
Alex fell into a doze, halfway between sleep and rousing, and only started moving when he felt Harry’s breath pick up a bit, arm stretching across Alex’s stomach. “Morning.”
Harry was already smiling as he looked up, resting his chin on Alex’s chest. “Morning.”
His hair was mussed at the top, and his eyes were still bleary, but he looked too perfect for Alex to keep from kissing him. He leaned in, uncaring about the morning breath, and drew Harry in for a kiss. Harry let out a startled but happy moan, fingers slipping up Alex’s side, tickling him gently.
Alex huffed a laugh into Harry’s mouth, nose pressed into his cheek. Harry was smiling, Alex could tell, and he drew his fingers up slower. The tickling turned into something more sensual, and Alex leaned in to kiss him again, turning it into something more, hot and passionate.
“I love you,” Harry said, as they parted.
“I love you too.” Alex stroked a hand over Harry’s shoulders. He sighed as he drew away. “I have to get to work.”
“Sadly,” Harry started, kissing Alex’s chin, “So do I.”
Alex stretched lazily, enjoying the way Harry folded his arms, resting his chin on his wrist as he regarded Alex. “Making it a little difficult if you stay there.”
“So?” Harry raised his eyebrows, tongue poking out of his mouth.
Alex rubbed his thumb over Harry’s cheek, brushing some semblance of order into his hair. “I don’t wanna go if that helps.”
Harry wasn’t smiling, but he didn’t seem particularly sad. He shrugged as much as he was able, and then rolled over and off Alex. He stretched out, sighing. “It does help. I guess we still have to move.”
Making an assenting noise, Alex lay next to him, both of them staring up at the ceiling. “We could always get together again soon.”
“I’d like that,” Harry said. They shared another lazy kiss. Reluctantly, they both rolled out of bed and went through their morning routine, a quarter of an hour spent in the shower, together, making out lazily. It was difficult to pull himself away from Harry, especially now that they had shared such an intimate moment.
When Alex’s alarm went off for the third time, indicating that he should get to work soon to keep from being late, Harry tapped him on the chest sadly. “You should go.”
Alex sighed, pressing a kiss to Harry softly, running a hand through his hair. “I’ll see you later?”
“Count on it.”
If he was going to leave he had to do it, so Alex forced himself out the door, not looking back for fear of giving in, going back to Harry and shutting them both in Harry’s apartment for the whole day. It was a nice thought, but he could foresee his mother’s glowering face in his future, angry at his disappearance. Thoughts of his mother weren’t particularly welcome, so he shook them off, and headed for his car.
The journey to work didn’t take that long at all; Alex’s brain was being really helpful in replaying scenes of last night and taunting him with things that could be if only he could get Harry back into bed sometime soon.
He wanted to reciprocate; he wanted to touch Harry everywhere, follow up his touches with soft kisses. He wanted to curl his hand around Harry’s dick, make him writhe and moan and beg. Alex tightened his grip on the steering wheel, chastising himself. Seriously, thinking sexual things about Harry wasn’t the best policy when he was driving down the freeway.
In the safety of his work environment, where few people would interrupt him, it would be fine. Or, well, not fine, because he would have to get some work done, but he could sneak one or two thoughts in here and there.
Unfortunately, by late morning, Alex’s reports were backed up, and he barely had time to grab a coffee.
“Are you okay to travel now?”
Alex looked up from his laptop. His mother was standing in the doorway, arms folded, one eyebrow raised. Alex blinked, then sighed, nodding. “Yeah. Where do you need me to go?”
“Leila has the details,” Aris waved a hand gently. Her eyes were narrowed, and she tilted her head, but Alex couldn’t read her expression. “I trust you had fun Monday night?”
Alex looked down at his laptop, feigning ignorance. He could feel his cheeks heating, but he bit his lip, shrugging. “Nothing much. Just friends I couldn’t put off.”
Aris didn’t believe him, Alex knew that immediately, but thankfully she let it go. She smiled, lips quirking up, and shrugged. “Keep your secrets, darling.”
“I will.” Alex nodded, making a mental note to swing by his mother’s assistant later and get the details. “How’s Bella?”
Aris rolled her eyes. “The same. Adamant that she and Milo are forever.”
It was on the tip of his tongue to ask what his parents didn’t like about Milo. “Mom—”
“That is a problem for another day,” Aris said, tapping the doorway. Her smile was sunny, and it reached her eyes. His mother really was beautiful, and Alex felt a pang that she made life so difficult sometimes. It was hard to reconcile this vision of his mother with the one t
hat haunted him at night. “I’ll see you later.”
As soon as she was gone, Alex spun his chair around to face the window, tugging out his phone and bringing up Harry’s text chat.
I have to go away for work. Hope you weren’t expecting to have me for too long :(
Dropping his phone into his lap, Alex tipped his head back. Getting lost in the whole losing his virginity thing had distracted him, however shortly, from the conundrum of just where he wanted this to go. He loved Harry and wanted to be with him and he had to be brave about this; he was going to have to tell his parents and put his foot down.
“Grow balls,” Alex told himself. Alex’s phone vibrated in his lap.
I’m disappointed but I understand it’s for work. Let me come meet you at the airport when you get home?
Thinking of their first meeting, Alex couldn’t wipe the grin from his face. Harry had been so tired, tripping over Alex’s feet, and he still liked the image of Harry in his beanie. Maybe he could get Harry to meet him at the airport with the beanie on. Chuckling to himself, Alex asked via text message, sending him an emoji of prayer hands.
Harry made life so much easier and made the prospect of work that much more appealing. Keeping his phone on the desk, keeping it to hand so that he could distract himself as much as possible, he turned back to his laptop.
The spreadsheets started to blur after a while, and Harry had returned to work, so time seemed to be crawling. Leila popped by just before Alex was contemplating going home, delivering the paperwork, plane tickets, and a reminder to keep receipts. They went through the same bullet points every time, and Alex rolled his eyes at her reminder, but she sighed.
“If only your brother would remember to bring me receipts.”
Alex laughed. “He barely remembers to put gas in his car.”
Which was a helpful reminder for himself. The plane tickets were for two days’ time, giving Alex enough time to sort out what he would need to take, and read up on where exactly he was going. The business held so many accounts, and his mother trusted him to keep on top of things, and while Alex appreciated the trust, it could be frustrating. Another thing to add to his “List of Reasons I Don’t Want to Work Here Anymore.”
Shoving everything into his briefcase, Alex made sure everything was shut down in his office. His phone started ringing as he made his way down to the parking lot, and he answered without looking. “Alexander Wheeler.”
“Always giving me your full name,” Harry said.
Alex swapped the phone to the hand carrying the briefcase. It was awkward, but he had to dig into his pocket for his car keys. “Just in case you forget.”
“As if I could.” There was the sound of Tao in the background. “Just wanted to check in. When do you leave?”
Alex tossed his briefcase on the passenger seat, sliding into the driver seat. He settled back against the headrest, free hand on the steering wheel. “Thursday. Do you have time to see me?”
Sighing, Harry let out a sad noise. “Unfortunately, no.”
Ignoring the pang at that, Alex closed his eyes. “You definitely have to pick me up in that beanie.”
Harry’s laugh was easy and free, and it immediately settled Alex’s sadness. There would be times when they couldn’t see each other, when it would get difficult. The key, he told himself sternly, was to take the moments where he could have them. “All right. You’ve convinced me.”
“Of course I have,” Alex’s tone was warm, and he stared down at his car dash, wrinkling his nose. “I need to get gas. Call me tomorrow night before I leave?”
“Promise,” Harry said, and again, Alex could hear Tao in the background. “I have to go. Dad needs something. I love you, Alex.”
“I love you too.” Alex waited for the dial tone before hanging up, dropping his phone onto the seat next to his briefcase. Home beckons.
Alex started the car, mind already on the tasks ahead of him, and he hadn’t left yet, but he couldn’t wait to get back to meet Harry at the airport.
Chapter Thirteen
Alex was waiting at Seattle-Tacoma International, slouched in his seat in a mimicry of his first meeting with Harry. Unfortunately, there would be no such bonus this time around. Alex had tucked himself out of the way, hood pulled up around his head, and headphones blocking out the chatter and screaming of the family in front of him. They had five kids, all of them shouting and talking over each other about whatever it was they were playing on their touchpads.
Alex’s phone started to ring, cutting through his music and he answered. “Hello?”
“Alex.” Alex’s mother answered warmly.
“Mom.” Alex rubbed at his eyes, ignoring his disappointment. Part of him had been hoping that it would be Harry. They hadn’t spoken for a day and a half, Harry busy at the bakery, and Alex working and traveling. “What’s up?”
“Your sister and I will pick you up from the airport,” she said, in the tone of someone who would accept no answering back. “There’s something we want to discuss with you.”
Alex’s heart hammered in his chest. “No, it’s all right. I can just meet you afterwards, once I’ve been to my apartment.”
Aris sighed. Alex usually answered her back, but she could act less like he was being a teenager. He was in his twenties, it had been a long time since he had really needed her. “Alex, there’s something I need to discuss with you, and no, it will not wait.”
Alex was panicking. He was at peace enough with himself to register his pulse, his clammy hands. “Mom – “
“I’ll be there to pick you up,” Aris said. “Text me what time your plane gets in.”
If there was one thing that Alex hated about himself, it was his inability to argue with her. Frustrated, Alex hung up on his mother before he could say something he would regret. He would have to text Harry something, tell him not to come. Alex wasn’t ready for them to meet; he didn’t want to have to fight his mother for the right to live how he wanted.
Texting his mother with the landing info, Alex stared down at Harry’s number in his phone. He owed him a call. This wasn’t something he could just text and hope that Harry would be okay with. What would work better? Did he tell the truth? Tell Harry his mother wanted to meet him instead? Knowing Harry, and how eager he was for them to move forward, he would want to meet her—and Alex couldn’t handle that right now. He was tired, stressed, and just wanted to spend the night with his boyfriend, not have to navigate his increasingly more difficult family life.
Sinking lower in his seat, Alex tucked one hand under his arm, texting one-handed with the other. Can’t meet at the airport. Flight is delayed and it gets in too late. I’ll find my own way home, especially if you have work in the morning. X
It was vague. Alex could almost foresee Harry’s text before it came.
Are you sure? I don’t care what time it is. I’ll just call in sick at work.
Alex was endeared by the text, but his hand was trembling as he typed a reply. I’m sorry. I really want to see you, but I won’t be much company. I’ll come see you at the bakery the day after? Bring your beanie :)))
Thankfully, when Alex’s phone next went off, Harry had sent him a sad face, but he also agreed. All right. I’ll see you then. Take care of yourself. I love you.
Alex’s thumb hovered over the words, stroking the screen gently. He felt like an asshole and a rush of anger at his mother for putting him in this situation. You put yourself in this situation, he thought furiously. You’re the reason this is happening.
The call went out for boarding, but Alex ignored it for a while, content to self-flagellate. Before the last call went out, he grabbed his bag, thumbing back an I love you too to Harry and tucked his phone away, heart heavy as he headed for the gate.
The flight was the worst of his life. Not even an exaggeration; it was like Alex couldn’t get comfortable, couldn’t stop feeling guilty with every minute that ticked by. It was only a five-hour flight, but by the time they were taxiing down t
he runway at LaGuardia, it felt more like ten.
Alex ran a hand over his face, pressing his forehead to the window. LaGuardia was well lit in the dying light, an impressive and familiar sight. People around him were already starting to get ready to leave, despite the hostess’ warning. Alex pulled his phone from his pocket, turning it on as soon as it was allowed. There was a message from his mother, two from Bella, and several from Harry, and notifications from various apps.
Alex’s heart sped up, fingers shaking as he hurried to read them all.
Don’t call me, the last from Harry.
Sorry, Alex, I didn’t know…, from Bella.
We’re here, from his mother.
Bella had tagged him, he realized, as the notifications from his apps popped up. Alex closed his eyes, feeling dread pool in his belly. Fuck. Part of him desperately wanted this to not be real. Someone nudged him angrily and Alex cursed at them, unable to help himself. The woman shrank back, but Alex didn’t apologize. He grabbed his carry on and hurried off the plane as fast as he could. As he made his way through to customs and security, he read the messages and learned three things in succession:
Bella had posted on social media that she was meeting him at the airport.
Harry followed Bella and had been notified.
Harry was mad that Alex had lied, hurt that he didn’t want Alex to meet his family, and angry enough that he didn’t want to speak to Alex right now, maybe ever.
Alex paused, pressing himself against the wall. He scrubbed angrily at his eyes as they burned, and he couldn’t stop his chest heaving, his breaths coming quickly. Don’t cry, he told himself furiously. Don’t cry.
It took about five minutes, the palms of his hands pressed to his eyes before he felt under control enough to continue through to baggage claims.
It felt like a fever dream; everything around him was moving slowly, sound extended and weird. Alex was barely able to comprehend that he was handing over his passport, that he was getting cleared, that he was headed for baggage claim.
