Cimmerian Shade: A Limited Edition Paranormal Romance & Urban Fantasy Collection

by Kiki Howell

  He warns, “I will not ask you twice.” He pulls his hand away as if I were something horrid, never to be touched.

  “Endymion...” My thoughts are swirling and I can’t think straight.

  Arianna replies, “You’ve strung the king along for far too long. Can’t you see that he has made up his mind?”

  No, I can’t believe it. “We can give this a real chance now.”

  His laugh is better—the first emotion I had gotten out of him. “Now we can give this a real chance?”

  Taking another step, I can feel my toes touching the tip of his boots. “Yes, I love you and I know you love me too.” Endymion isn’t Pan and he doesn’t have a flute to manipulate my thoughts and feelings. This is real, the pain is real.

  The love is real.

  Arianna says from behind me, “Oh this is absurd. You are making a fool of yourself.”

  Endymion leans toward me and I catch wind of his scent. My knees falter, as I can now feel his breath on my right cheek.

  “Selene, you were right all along: we do not belong. We have two different worlds and I’m only pleased that I saw it now before it was too late.” With those words he withdraws, leaving my skin to feel cold and barren.

  My eyes tear up. “You love me!”

  “I thought I did.”

  “Something is wrong—this is not you, Endymion.” It can’t be him. Without hesitation, I close in the remaining space between us and crane my neck to kiss him. To feel and taste the real him. To prove to him that I am willing to be the woman he needs me to be.

  When our lips touch, at first it feels like everything will be okay. Our kisses always make the world seem better. I get the tease of the butterflies starting to flutter—it’s a whisper of beseeching expectations. But within moments, unkind hands grab me at the back of my neck.

  Endymion jerks me away. “If you are looking for someone to fill the void between your thighs, I’m your king. It’s been long overdue—don’t you think you owe me the pleasure of savoring that sweet little cunt of yours?”

  Pan’s words are a vicious attack[M1] . He’s what you want, but does he know what you need? Does the mortal know how you love to be kissed and where? Does he know how to touch you just right, to have your sweet little cunt sweltering?

  Endymion is what I want and need, both physically and emotionally. Tears fall down my cheeks, and I can’t swallow past the lump lodged in my throat. This is not him, although it looks like the man I had fallen in love with. Endymion would never be this cruel to me—he would adore me. Just earlier today I could see his love for me with those green eyes, felt it emanating from his gaze. But tonight there is no life, no love.

  Arianna advises him, “Have the guards bring her back to your chambers—you can have fun with your goddess.”

  He pauses, as if thinking, and within a heartbeat Endymion releases me. “I suggest you never show your face in Elis again.”

  With those final words, Endymion and his bride-to-be walk away. Arianna looks back on me with a wicked gleam in her brown eyes and a victorious smirk.

  The guards follow shortly after and I’m left in the streets of Elis. I watch the mortal I love walk away with another woman. I’m left with the bitter memories of his words and how he treated me. Yet despite everything, I still can’t make myself believe it all.

  The memories seem false, but they just happened.

  His words seem foreign, but they came out of his mouth.

  How could this be the same man, who proclaimed his love for me? This morning he was willing to risk his life to protect me and by night his mind has completely changed?

  What is going on?

  Did Zeus have something to do with Endymion and his sudden change of perspective? Was this a trick—did Zeus grant my access to earth only to persuade the man I love against me? If so, why? Why and how could someone be that dreadful?

  Pan did something?

  Maybe Arianna talked nonsense into his ear?

  Anything could have happened, and I would never know. Endymion expressed that he doesn’t love me anymore, but that was a lie. It has to be. I can’t bring myself to believe it.

  Go home.

  He loves me.

  Go home.

  If you don’t go home, he’ll do far worse than what Pan has already done.

  Go home!

  Closing my eyes, I feel the tears streaming down my cheeks and chin.

  Before I know it, I’m inside of Endymion’s bedchambers. I look around me and settle down on a chair, knowing that I am not going anywhere until he tells me what is going on.

  Chapter Sixteen

  I CAN FEEL it, the shift in the air as the moon has only a few hours left to bask in the night. Outside, the mortals have calmed with their festival when it began to rain heavily. The music had quieted and the blaring voices of laughter and excitement were coming to an end.

  Through my wait, I wonder if he acted that harshly toward me because of Arianna. Endymion had said it was a marriage of convenience. Maybe something happened after Zeus had taken me back to Olympus. Maybe Endymion couldn’t get himself out of the wedding. After all, it was happening in less than a week.

  I am driving myself crazy, sitting here and waiting for Endymion. I begin tracing my thumbs and fidgeting with my fingers. My head snaps up upon hearing voices in the hallway. The footsteps and voices near the room and my heart begin pounding. I'm holding my breath by the time the sounds have disappeared down the hall, away from the bedroom door. Inhaling, I all but choke on the air when the door suddenly opens and in walks Endymion.

  My heart pauses as his gaze settles on me, and he closes the door behind him. The hair on my forearm rises; I swallow the sudden pool of saliva, unsure of his response. I feel feverish as he saunters toward me, never once releasing me from his cutting gaze. I want to say something but I’m afraid of his words, afraid I won’t be able to handle the final verdict.

  My heart is thundering, pelting itself against my rib cage. Once upon a time, I thought it wanted to hand itself over to Endymion. Now it seems it wants to flee the darkness that’s glistening inside of his vibrant emerald eyes.

  No, this is not the mortal I fell in love with.

  Endymion takes me in, “I see you’re taking me up on my offer.”

  “What has happened to you?”

  “The truth.”

  I shake my head. “I told you the truth.”

  “No, my greedy little goddess. You played me like a puppet.” Endymion raises his hand into the air and splays out his fingers as if he’s controlling a string puppet. “And like the mortal fool that I am, I fell in love with the delicate beauty of the moon goddess. Her exquisite radiance engulfed me within her lies and deception of what she would call love.”

  “I was not intentionally deceiving you, and you had never told me about Arianna.”

  He takes a quick stride toward me; frightened, I step back, almost tripping over my own two feet. Endymion grabs onto my arm and jerks me forward. My hands regretfully brace against his chest. It feels nice underneath the soft fabric, and a shaky breath escapes my lungs. My body shudders to be so close to him, smelling him, and I’m conflicted because I know I shouldn’t be aroused. I should be cautious, anything other than feeling my nipples perk and my sex throb.

  It clenches not once, not twice, but more than three times, demanding to be filled.

  Another betrayal from my physical body.

  His hold tightens on my arm, and I withhold a groan with his restraint. Endymion leans down toward my face but I turn away from him. “Let me go,” I plead softly, knowing that I don’t stand a chance. There is no Pan and no flute. No deception and manipulation.

  It’s raw desire in its truest, ugliest form.

  “Selene.” His voice is a whisper against my ear. “Despite everything that I’ve said, one thing that I know is true: you want my cock inside of your tight little cunt. I dare you to say otherwise.”

  Still gazing across the room, I answer, “
Not like this.”

  He chuckles—that damn sound always has me weak in the knees. “Not like what?” he asks. His hot tongue licks my earlobe and I swallow back a moan—any sound at all would give him the upper hand.

  I need to leave.

  I push against him with my free hand. He groans, and within seconds he releases my hand, dips down, and throws me over his shoulder.

  I scream at him as he moves across the room, “Endymion! Put me down!”

  “As the goddess wishes.” And then he tosses me down.

  I bounce on something soft—a bed. I let out a relieved breath, but before I can gather my thoughts Endymion grabs my ankle and he pulls me toward him. He positions himself between my thighs and gropes my legs with such roughness that sets my blood on fire.

  He takes in a breath. “So smooth.”

  “I don’t want to do this,” I lie, but I can’t escape because my body doesn’t want to leave.

  Grabbing onto my inner thighs, he takes in another sharp breath. “Liar.”

  I shake my head, trying to will myself to fight. “You aren’t you,” is my small attempt. But all I get from him is another wicked chuckle before his hand slips under my gown and finds my sex. His fingers push past my wet folds, and I suck in a sharp breath of my own.

  “Ah, there’s your greedy little sex,” he murmurs.

  I freeze.

  “How much do you want me?”

  More than you will ever know.

  I don’t answer him, I can’t. My body is betraying me and so will my words.

  He goads, “Tell me how much you want to feel my cock inside of you.”

  I want your cock inside of me.

  “Selene.” His raucous voice is like a drug to my ears. “I had the flavor of your pussy on my tongue, and I didn’t even get a thank you.”

  “I was g—” I stop, my mouth stuck open when a little piece of euphoria cripples my sex.

  Endymion rubs my clit with two of his fingers. “I’m sorry,” he taunts. “I believe you were telling me how greedy your divine cunt is. Isn’t that why you were withholding yourself, you thought that I didn’t deserve to be buried inside of you?”

  Shaking my head, I’m unable to answer as his fingers continue to rub my sensitive nub more fiercely. My eyes close and I know I should fight, but I can’t. I bite back a moan.

  When my hips buck against his sexual wrath, Endymion stops and my eyes spring open.

  “Say the words,” he urges. “Your greedy cunt wants me.”

  Withdrawing his fingers, he brings them up to his lips and sucks on my wetness. I swallow the ravenous hunger raging inside of my stomach.

  I can’t say those words.

  When I don’t answer, he lowers his hand back to my sex and begins his sexual onslaught. I don’t know if this is a punishment or reward, but if feels horribly amazing. Endymion keeps wringing me tighter and tighter, winding me up with the bittersweet bliss on the horizon and when I’m there, right on the crest, he withdraws.

  “You know what I want to hear.”

  Barely able to open my eyes and on a strained breath, I murmur, “Endymion...” I can’t get out the rest of the sentence. “I’m sorry.”

  He looks at me, amused.

  Why do I keep screwing everything up? Maybe this world was never meant for me.

  Endymion’s gaze pierces my soul. “Always lying.”

  His words cut my heart. “Do what you want to me.” I deserve that after all, don’t I?

  I expect him to resume but he pauses for a moment too long. When I narrow my disheartened sight on the mortal, I find him staring. He’s not moving, and his gaze is empty.

  Hesitantly I ask, “Are you all right?”

  He doesn’t respond.

  Sitting up on my elbows, I ask him again, but no response.

  On a next breath—as if he snapped out of whatever trance he was in—he looks down on me.

  “Selene!” His voice is familiar; there’s affection on his tone. Love.

  “Endymion...”

  Suddenly his eyes widen. “Don’t believe my words.”

  Drawing my thighs together, I sit up. “What is going on?”

  “You need to leave,” he says urgently, grabbing my arm and hauling me from the bed.

  “Wait, you should come with me.”

  “I cannot disappear—I am King of Elis.”

  Without thinking, I throw myself against his body and standing on the tip of my toes, I kiss him deeply.

  Endymion breaks away from the kiss. “Selene, my love, you need to leave.”

  “Not without you.”

  “Ari—”

  The door opens behind us and I swivel on my heels to find Arianna sauntering into the room. She closes the door behind her.

  Arianna says simply, “Endymion, confine the goddess.”

  Instantly, I feel Endymion’s hand grab my arm from behind. I fight against his hold. “Endymion, what has she done to you?”

  Arianna laughs. “You are quite the stubborn goddess.”

  “Why are you abiding by her commands?”

  “I opened his eyes.”

  “You manipulated him against me.”

  “He sees the truth.”

  “You do not know anything of the truth.”

  “I know that you two can never be and you know that. Deities and mortals cannot be happy together. You strung him along like a lost puppy and turned him against me. Selene, you almost got him murdered with that demon that came after you.”

  “I never strung him along.”

  Endymion twists my hand behind my back and I cry out. “Are you still lying?”

  “I’m not lying!”

  Arianna says, “You are selfish, and we need to get rid of you. Endymion, we can’t have her awake.”

  My mind remembers my home, but I’m still here.

  Why can I not leave?

  His tight grip turns me around, and Endymion says, “See you when you awake.” His hands cover my mouth and nose, stopping me from breathing. I thrash against him as best as I can, but with the lack of air I pass out.

  Chapter Seventeen

  STREAKS OF CRIMSON light glow in the darkness. They gently touch my skin, rubbing softly with warm, dainty strokes. I bask in the touch, the jaunty caress, but I can’t move. My limbs are... I’m not too sure. All I know is that I can’t feel or move them, and the funny thing is that I don’t care.

  Where am I?

  My skin feels cool and wet. A flow of water brushing up against my flesh makes me realize that I’m floating in a river. It’s still dark, and the crimson light glowing around me are Eos’ and Helios’ ceremonial orbs.

  Why would they be performing in the dark? Or together, for that matter.

  “Calista...”

  That’s Pan’s voice.

  “Go away,” I say to him—at least I think I said those words, although my lips don’t move. But I hear the words in my mind and all around me, echoing into the thick, lush forest of Arkadia. Now I’m standing and I see foliage everywhere.

  “Calista, it’s time to wake up.” His voice is an echo.

  I want to stay here forever. “Leave me alone.”

  “Wake up!” Pan roars, and my eyes pop open.

  Immediately I inhale deeply. Feeling the burning at the back of my throat, I start coughing. I can feel something restraining my limbs when I sit up.

  I'm wet—why am I wet?

  When my eyes are able to focus, I first see candles. Many little flames encircle the entire area, and it hits me that I am in Mount Latmus. My bottom of my chiton is wet from the small amount of water on the ground. Which also makes sense why I was coughing—I awoke with the side of my face in the water. It isn’t that high; it doesn’t even reach my kneecaps.

  If I can get my hands free I can use the water to my advantage.

  Arianna’s voice rings throughout the temple walls, “The goddess has awoken.”

  “Why are we here?” I ask, turning to her voice. “J
ust let me go, and you will never see me again.”

  That is a lie because after Endymion had proven to me that the real him was still in there, I can never leave Arianna alone with him, ever.

  I catch sight of Endymion standing right behind her, and something is in his grasp.

  Arianna takes a step toward me, her feet sloshing in the low water. “Yes, because everything in life is that easy.”

  “It can be,” I say, then feel horrible because if only I had thought that everything was that easy with Endymion. Cautiously I wiggle my wrists, trying to get a feel of what is keeping me confined. The coarse, itchy texture lets me know that it’s rope. “Well unfortunately for you, I don’t like the easy path.” Behind my back, I wiggle my fingers to get a feel of my limitations, for my ability to manipulate water. I won’t be able to attack Arianna or Endymion like this.

  The female continues. “It’s a shame that it had to come down to this, a goddess versus a mortal. But when you suddenly showed up and stole Endymion’s attention away from me, I couldn’t have that.”

  “You knew about us?” Like Pan had.

  I was worried about the gods in Olympus seeing what I was up to, but I didn’t even realize that the ones who would do us most harm are those on earth.

  “Of course. There is not a move my future husband makes that I am not aware of.”

  Glancing at Endymion, I wonder why he’s silent.

  Arianna catches my sight. “Don’t bother—I told him not to pay you any mind.”

  Told him.

  “He said that it was a marriage of convenience.” I needed to keep her distracted long enough to figure something out.

  She frowns. “Yes, but we could have had it all—love, power, and riches. We would have been a mighty nation with our combined kingdoms, ruling together as equals, but then he started to sneak out at nights. At first, I thought it was a night stroll, but it started happening more frequently. To find out about you, a moonlight goddess manipulating my fiancé—imagine how shocked and upset I was.”

  “Do you love him?”

  “Love?” Arianna asks like it’s a word she didn’t know. “You need more than love to control a nation.”