What Hurts The Most 3

by Tynessa

  Finally, after more than ten minutes of sitting there thinking, I got out the car and headed inside. Tan’s mood swings had been something serious since she became pregnant. A part of me had myself to blame for that, though. Not for getting her pregnant, but for the part that had her depressed most days–me getting another woman pregnant.

  I walked inside our apartment, and the sight in front of me caused my heart to melt. Tan was laying on the couch on her back while sleeping Lil Kace laid on her chest. I knew I was risking see my son again, but I wanted Tan to get used to him. I’d lied to Rachel by telling her that I wouldn’t bring him around Tan, then when I got home to Tan I lied and told her I needed to make a run, just so she could get used to him. I know it’s sneaky, but it is what it is.

  “How’s my three favorite people?” I asked as I walked over, kneeled down, and gave Tan a kiss on the lips. I then kissed Lil Kace on his forehead, and kissed her growing belly.

  “We’re good. Here, go lay him down,” she said as passed me my son. I did what I was told, and returned back to the living room momentarily. Sitting on the couch, I patted my lap so she could prop her legs there. Once she did, I began messaging her feet. I knew if felt good by the way she had her head thrown back and her eyes closed while rubbing her belly. I was truly thankful for her being in my life.

  “What are you thinking about?” I asked her.

  “Just hoping it’s a little girl. I mean, since you already have your Jr. and all,” Tan responded. Though she didn’t sound like she meant anything by it, I knew she did. I knew Tan was still hurt behind the whole Rachel situation, and if I could mend her broken heart I would.

  “It doesn’t matter to me, I just hope it’s a healthy baby,” I said.

  “I agree. I hope it’s a healthy baby girl,” Tan continued to rub her stomach and say. We chatted for a little while longer before someone started banging on the front door like a damn maniac. “Who the hell is that?” asked Tan.

  “I don’t know, but they done lost their minds.” As I walked to the door, I prayed and hoped it wasn’t Rachel’s dumb ass sneaking up on me. Though I was praying that it wasn’t, something deep within me knew it was. “Shit,” I cursed because that something was right.

  “Where the fuck is my son? I told you I didn’t want him around this bitch,” Rachel screamed as she brushed past me like she lived here. Taking a deep frustrating breath, I released it slowly as I closed the door.

  “Don’t come over here disrespecting my girl, Rachel,” I said to her. As we walked back into the living room, Tan was slowly getting off the couch. The look upon her face let me know it was about to be some shit.

  “Don’t talk to me about no damn disrespect when you disrespected me by bringing my son over here when I specifically told you not to,” Rachel spun around and said as she waved her index finger in my face.

  I knocked it away from me and said, “But he’s my son and if I wanna bring him to my house, then I can. I don’t need you to tell me where I can and can’t take him.” I was fucking heated.

  “If you wanna see him, then you go by my rules. But you know what, we don’t even have to worry about that anymore. I guess you wanted to call my bluff but I see I’m a have to show you. If you wanna be with this bitch then you can, but Kacey Jr isn’t.” Right when Rachel finished her sentence, I had to jump in between her and Tan. It happened so fast that I didn’t even see Tan when she walked up on Rachel and slapped the shit out of her.

  “I got yo’ bitch!” said Tan as she struggled to get away from me. I didn’t know where my baby got all this strength from, but I was struggling to keep them apart. I didn’t want to hurt Tan and my unborn child, nor did I want Rachel to get to her. Finally, I lifted Tan in the air and rushed her to our bedroom. Her ass was heated and ready to beat my ass. “I told you over and over that this is not what I’m about to go through,” she said to me. I already knew what she was referring too.

  “I know and I didn’t think it would be a big deal. I don’t even know how she knew we were here. She must’ve followed me,” I responded over Rachel beating on the bedroom door as she yelled what she was going to do to Tan and me if we didn’t open the mothafucka for her.

  “That’s you fucking problem, you never think!” Turning around, Tan got a crying Lil Kace off the bed and handed him to me. “Here. Just get your son and get your ugly ass babymama out my apartment. Right Now!”

  “Kacey, did you tell the bitch while she’s living in this little funky ass shack and thinking she’s your main bitch, you’re paying for me to live in that nice ass house she came to?” yelled Rachel. I swear, I felt like I was about to die.

  Did this bitch just yell that shit out? I thought to myself. I couldn’t get out the bedroom fast enough. I couldn’t even look back at Tan, because I knew the info more than likely hurt her feelings. I didn’t even want her questioning me about if it was true or not.

  Rushing out the room, I slammed the door so Rachel couldn’t get in there. All the while, she was still screaming about how I was taking care of her household and how all the money I made from Jay and Tez went to her. I was busted cold!

  “Shut the fuck up and get out my fucking shit! What the fuck is yo’ mothafuckin’ problem? You ignorant as fuck for that shit yo,” I said to her petty ass. Now why she had to go run her mouth about that shit?

  “Oh, so you’re trying to put me out because I told your bitch that you got me living good while she still in this little ass dump? You mad huh?”

  “Nah, I’m putting you out because you ignorant as fuck!” I pushed her to the door. We continued to fussed and curse each other out until I slammed the door in her face. Even with that, she stood on the other side beating on the door like there was no tomorrow. I could hear my son crying, but I refused to open this door back up.

  “You might as well go right on out there with her so you can catch that ride,” said Tan as she stood in the doorway with a bag. She tossed it to me and when I looked inside, it was some of my clothes she’d packed while I was in there arguing with Rachel.

  “Tan Baby,” I said as I began walking towards her. She held up her hand, stopping me.

  “Save it Kacey, because I don’t want to hear it. Really Kacey? You’re paying that bitch bills and for her to stay in that nice ass house while we’re sleeping on top of one another in this apartment? We have a baby coming in four and a half months and you haven’t even mentioned us moving into a house,” Tan said truthfully. I was so busted that I had nothing to say. I just dropped my head and stared at the floor like a child. Tan had forgiven me about the baby, but I honestly felt in my heart that this might be the last straw for her.

  “You know, all these months I’ve been wondering where all your money has been going to since we barely have enough to make ends meet here. Now I know where to! I can’t do this shit no more Kacey. All the stressing and shit isn’t worth it. I can do bad all by myself,” she let me know. All these years I’d been faithful to Tan, and lately I was feeling like one of those dog ass niggas that took their women for granted–the kind of guy I promised her repeatedly that I wouldn’t be.

  “Baby, I promise,” I began to beg, but Tan wasn’t trying to hear anything I had to say, and at that point I couldn’t blame her. I was just a fuck up!

  “All I’ve been hearing since you came home is promises and I’m sorry. Every time I forgive you and try to push your fuck ups to the back of my mind, something comes up that reminds me I should’ve followed my heart in the first place.”

  When Tan said that, I looked at her ass like she’d just lost her mind. I understand she’s hurting right now, but what type of shit was that to say?

  “Followed your heart? What the fuck that supposed to mean?” I asked, which I already knew the answer to it.

  “It meant what I said! But I tried to make us work because I’ve invested too much time with you to just up and walk away.”

  Well damn, I didn’t know if I should feel honored or what. Not once did she s
ay she chose me because she loved me. So basically, the only reason we were together was because of the years we’d been together. Pretty much, Tan was standing there letting me know she was in love with another man.

  Nodding my head up and down, I picked at my chin hairs and said nothing. Hurt would’ve been an understatement.

  “I’m sorry Kacey, but you know like I know that this ship had sailed. Too much is going on, and I’m not up for that drama that comes along with being with you. I just think it’s time for us to go our separate ways. I love you, but I just can’t do it,” Tan said with teary eyes.

  “As bad as I hate to say it, you’re right. My life is drama filled now, and I don’t want you to have to go through any bullshit being with me. Just know that I love you and walking out this door is one of the hardest things I ever had to do,” I said. Tan didn’t understand how much I loved her. Though she’d just said some fucked up shit that ripped my heart to pieces, I was still deeply in love with her.

  “I’ll call you tomorrow, maybe we could meet at the doctor’s office.” I just nodded my head as I picked up my bag. I let Tan know that I would come for the rest of my things and was gone about my business.

  Once I got outside, I called up Jay and luckily he was in the area. In a code talk, he let me know him and Tez was about to go handle that nigga Lo, but he would come scoop me up first. Any other time, I would feel some type of way being around Tez, especially with Tan admitting she was in love with him, but I didn’t–mainly because she stated what I already knew. I just couldn’t believe it was the end of us.

  Chapter 27

  Zero To A Hundred!

  Lo

  I looked at my phone for the umpteen time and sat the bitch back down. Bree had finally stopped calling me, now Shay was blowing me up like she ain’t have a bit of sense. She said all she had to say when she almost killed my ass. Then again, the thought of her calming down and wanting to apologize, or maybe something being wrong with one of the kids, crossed my mind. I answered.

  “Yeah man?” I answered, not even bothering to hide my frustration. I had more important shit going on and I needed to stay focused, and there’s no way I could do that with Shay’s nagging ass in my ear complaining and shit.

  “Look, you need to call your unfit ho and tell her to come get ya’ll baby, or you need to be making your way over here to get her,” Shay got straight to the point of her reason for calling.

  “What? What you mean come get Brittani? What is she doing there?” I asked confusedly. Now wasn’t the time to go through this shit with Shay and Bree. What in the world was Bree thinking to drop Brittani off over at Shay’s house? I swear, that girl was going to make me put my foot in her ass.

  “I don’t know what happened or why she dropped her off over here. She came to my doorstep covered all in blood and all she said was Britt wanted me so she brought her to me. I don’t know what happened, but Britt didn’t have a scratch on her and that was a good thing, because your girl was sloppy drunk,” she explained.

  “Wait? Why was she covered in blood? Was she hurt?” I stopped loading up the guns that were scattered all over the table. Hearing that Bree might’ve been hurt grabbed my attention and tugged at my heart. Her ass worked my nerves, but I would die if something happened to her.

  “Look, just come get Britt. You can worry about that slut later,” and with that, Shay up on me. I wasted no time calling Bree’s phone. I began feeling bad for ignoring her phone calls, but I was still upset with her for running her damn mouth so much.

  “Shit,” I cursed out loud when she didn’t answer. “Man, let’s go ahead and get this shit over with because I have some business to take care of,” I spoke to my goons—which consist of, Ke’, Rico, B, and Chuck.

  Tonight we were going old school and doing a drive-by. I was determined to get those niggas out the picture by any means. My cousin Ke’ and Rico was hitting up Jay’s crib while me, Chuck, and B, hit Tez’s. If he wasn’t there then we’d definitely hit up his girl’s spot. I had no problem hitting her fine ass with a bullet also. I didn’t think Kacey would be a problem, so I wasn’t worried too much about him. Everybody knew he wouldn’t be shit without Jay and Tez.

  Looking over at my cousin, I noticed he’d been awfully quiet since he gotten to this warehouse that we was setting up at.

  “What’s yo’ problem cuz? You been a little too quiet,” I said to him. “I know you ain’t bitching out?” I questioned him.

  “You sure you wanna do this shit tonight? I mean, you do know it’s more to a shoot-out than just hopping in the ride and going shooting up shit. Have you even been casing the spot we’re hitting up? You know I’m not with no sloppy job?” he ranted on. I looked at his bitch ass in disgust. Asia was turning my cousin into a real bitch. There was a time Ke’ would bust his shit without asking questions. That’s part of the reason I called the nigga to come out here. I knew he would get the job done, but since he met Asia, all he’s been doing is being in my damn way.

  “What’s there to plan out, Ke’? We’re doing a fucking drive-by. Whoever out there better get the fuck out the way or they’re getting popped.”

  “Man whatever. How do you know these niggas? Are they trustworthy?” This nigga was asking too many damn questions.

  “Man you bugging Ke’, damn. You really think these niggas would be here ready to go make this move if they were against us? Use your head mothafucka,” I told him. I was ready to put a bullet in his ass if he didn’t shut up. I looked over at Chuck, and I could tell he was becoming agitated. I think he wanted Tez and Jay’s blood more than me, being that they shot him then turned right around and popped his little brother, Darius.

  “Nah mothafucka, you use yo’ head! If u know them so good, tell me why I been seeing them hanging with the niggas you’re gunning for?” I cut my eyes at B, then Rico because Ke’ had pointed them out. I guess the expression on my face let my cousin know that I was unaware of the news he’d just delivered. “You’s a dumb ass fucker!” Ke’ finished off by saying to me.

  “Ya’ll mothafuckas trying to set me up?” I ignored Ke’ and asked Rico and B, but before they had a chance to speak, a shot struck Chuck right in the middle of his forehead. “Gotdamn!” I yelled out as we all ran and took cover. Me and my goons began firing back, and all was heard was gunfire. Neither one of us was backing down. I was trying to hit whoever, family or not. Shit, I didn’t know who was with me and who was against me.

  Once the gun play had ceased, I heard none other than Tez’s voice.

  “You might as well bring your ass out of hiding Lo, because you are as good as got,” he said to me. I peeked around from where I was hiding at, but didn’t see anyone but Chuck’s dead ass body. “I’m just trying to talk and see what your motive was for crossing me after all that we’ve been through. I thought we was fam? I eat, you eat, remember?” Tez continued to rant on.

  I noticed that his voice was getting close; a little too close, so I peeked around and the nigga was making his way over to me. Stepping from the wall I was hiding behind, I aimed my 9mm at him as my trigger finger itched.

  “Damn bruh, it’s like that? When did you start feeling this way about me? Before or after you started fucking my bitch?” the nigga asked with that cocky ass smile I hated. Tez was so cocky it was ridiculous, but the nigga was cool as fuck though, and a part of me hated that our friendship had come to this. He just had something that I wanted. His lifestyle! Tez had more bitches and money than a nigga could dream of; Jay too, and if killing them was something that I had to do to get it, then so be it.

  “It was before! That was just the icing on the cake,” I responded with a smirk. By now, everyone was out of hiding with their guns drawn on one another.

  I was standing here with mine on Tez, and he had his on me as well. Rico and B were pointing theirs at one another. Rico had been reporting to me, but I still didn’t know what he was telling Tez and them. After all, how did they know we would be here tonight? Ke’ had his Gl
ock pointed at Jay while Jay was standing there holding two guns, one that was pointed at me, and I wasn’t at all surprised when the other one was pointed at my cousin Ke’.

  “I knew you was a grimy ass nigga, but never once did I think you would cross me,” said Tez’s bitch ass.

  “It is what it is. The only reason you made it alive last time is because of my punk ass cousin,” I looked over at Ke’. For the first time since we’d been standing there, Tez took his eyes off me and followed my gaze. He looked back at me only to return his stare at my cousin.

  “You the mothafucka that was at the bar the night I was shot,” Tez said to Ke’. Out the corner of my eyes, I could see Jay grip his gun a little tighter that he had pointed at Ke’. Neither Tez nor Jay was the talkative type when their guns were out, especially Tez, so I’m surprised that he was doing all this talking right now.

  “Nigga how you think we knew you was there?” When I said that, Ke’ looked over at me, not believing I’d just lied. How we knew Tez was there didn’t have nothing to do with Ke’, but if these nigga was going to kill me, then we all was going to die in this bitch.

  “I knew it was a reason my finger itched for this mothafucka,” Jay finally spoke up, never taking his eyes off Ke’.

  Before anyone could utter another word, the voice of Detective Charles was being heard, pleading for his life.

  “I have a family. Please, son, just let me go,” he begged. Where he came from, I didn’t know. All I know is, bitch ass Kacey was walking this nigga in with a gun up to his head. Now I knew Kacey wasn’t about that life and wasn’t going to hurt a fly, so I didn’t know why they brought him along. I guess this fool felt like he had to prove a point or something. Kacey was a funny little clown.