Bad Dad

by Sloane Howell

  “That’s my job. Taking ass kickings.”

  He laughed and waved me off with a hand.

  “I’ll go get ready. Be back in a few.”

  “No rush. It’s your funeral.” He grinned.

  I strode back into Gus’s office. He sat behind an oak desk covered in papers. He was glued to his computer monitor.

  “What’s up?”

  He held up a finger and then turned to me. His eyes were sunk in. Face ashen. He motioned me over. Sweat beads peppered his forehead. “Got a problem.”

  I stepped over a pair of shoes and some stray sparring gear. I didn’t like the look on his face. Didn’t like his words. Rarely was my gut wrong about something, and my intestines wrenched tighter with each step.

  What could he be staring at that had him breaking out in a cold sweat?

  “What is it?”

  My heart took a nosedive into my stomach the second my eyes hit the screen. And I’d already told Logan he could go back to school.

  LATER THAT EVENING, JANET SAT on the couch in the living room. I walked by and saw Tom Hanks on the screen.

  “What are you watching?”

  Her head whipped back to me. “Ladykillers. You seen it?”

  I stepped into the kitchen to grab a bottled water from the refrigerator. “Is that the one where they rob the casino?”

  “Yes.” She turned back to the screen. “I think, anyway. Don’t tell me anything else.”

  I walked back with my water. My body sunk into the cushions on the couch, and I blew out a long sigh.

  “Something on your mind?” Her eyes stayed glued to the screen.

  “Yeah.”

  “And?”

  My face twisted and I glared in her direction.

  She made a big production of grabbing the remote and pausing the movie. “Do you want to tell me what’s wrong, Landon?”

  I shook my head. “You really don’t know?”

  She stood up.

  “Where you going?”

  “Home. So I can watch a movie in peace.” She reached for her purse that was far bigger than any person needed for necessities.

  “Sorry, I figured you’d know.”

  She waved me off with a hand.

  I paused and switched gears. “I told him he could go back to school.”

  She walked toward the door. Ignored me.

  I sat there motionless. “Did you hear what I said?”

  She stopped and turned to face me. “You want a medal or something?”

  My face heated and the water bottle crunched in my hand. I stood from the couch. “No. I just wanted you to know.”

  I watched her and saw gears turning behind her eyes. “I’m going to kill him for showing you that.”

  “Who, Gus?”

  “Yes, Gus. Of course.” She pointed a finger at me. “And then I’m gonna kill your ass.”

  “So he did tell you?”

  “We talk about everything.” She shook her head. “And why?”

  “I don’t know. I’m not sure what’s going on.”

  She nodded. “Oh, I see what this is now.” She pointed a finger at me and chuckled, but her words had barbs attached to them. “You told him he could go back to school. And now you get to gloat about the fact that you were right? That what this is?”

  I shook my head. “No. It’s about making sure you have the information. And that Logan is safe.”

  “Right. Right. Okay, well I got it.” She was through the door before I could say another word.

  The bottled water exploded in my hand. I’d crushed it in my palm. I turned and glared at the image on the television screen. I wasn’t sure if I was upset about Logan going back to school, Janet jumping to conclusions, or the fact my past had shown back up on a monitor in Gus’s office. I had to find a way to keep him safe during the day. I’d have to work, and I didn’t like the idea of Logan being on his own, and he was going back to school. A promise was a promise, and I didn’t break them with him. One thing was certain, if there was a way to make everyone happy, I didn’t know what it was.

  I walked to the hallway and snatched up the book I was reading. I sat there outside Logan’s door the entire night. Not one word on the pages registered in my brain. I had an idea, though. If I couldn’t be there with Logan at school, maybe I could persuade Ms. Chapman to keep an eye out for anything suspicious.

  CHAPTER 6

  Cora Chapman

  I COULDN’T HAVE SMILED HARDER if I’d tried when Janet dropped Logan off at school that morning. He’d given in. He’d thought it through and made a decision. Maybe I’d rushed into judging Landon Lane.

  I’d stared at Logan’s empty seat for the past few days and thought about him constantly.

  With Logan in class the day flew by and I walked the kids outside to wait for buses and their parents.

  Maybe he’ll show up.

  A long line of cars circled through the parking lot and crossing guards waved bright red stop signs back and forth.

  Kids darted around, playing. There were squeals of laughter and the occasional wail. I glanced up to the sky and let the sun bathe my face. Nothing beats a nice day in Montana.

  “I’m sorry again. For the other day.”

  I turned around to face Principal Williams. I shrugged. What else could I do?

  He took another step toward me. “I know it was probably uncomfortable.”

  “Yeah, it was.” I glanced over and saw Hastings out of the corner of my eye. He was picking Cory up. He winked at me. I shuddered and threw up in my mouth a little.

  I managed to keep a straight face and pushed my disgust deep down. I tried to smile at Cory and ignore his father. Hastings pushed Cory inside the car and started over toward us.

  “It happened so fast. I was only in the bathroom for a few minutes. I’m really sorry.”

  “He’s coming over.”

  Principal Williams’ head glanced up to Hastings and then dropped again. His face blanched and he slapped a palm on his forehead. “Geez.”

  I shook my head at him. Pussy.

  “I just remembered. I have an appointment—” He turned and walked away. Fast.

  Hastings was about thirty feet away and closing the distance between us.

  My head rotated around on a swivel.

  I didn’t have time to make an escape.

  I didn’t have to.

  He froze up and paled, like he’d been embalmed and stuffed by a taxidermist.

  What the hell?

  He whipped around and took off toward his car. That’s when I felt the heat on my back. It wasn’t the sun. I eased myself around a hundred and eighty degrees.

  Landon stood there. About ten feet behind me. Hood on. Glaring in Hastings’ direction. My whole body lit up in flames. “Thank you.”

  “He needed to be at school.”

  “No, I meant—” I turned back around but Hastings was gone. When I spun back Landon was within a few feet of me. My breath hitched.

  He pushed his hood back and let it fall down behind his thick, broad shoulders. His hand reached out. “Landon Lane.”

  My heart crept up into my throat in the best way possible. We hadn’t been able to meet properly the first time. This was us starting over.

  “Cora Chapman.”

  Our skin touched. His hand could’ve crushed my fingers to dust. There was something about the way men shook hands. It was such a simple action, yet it was one of the most important. It was how they sized each other up. Landon Lane’s handshake was different. The potential energy was there, but it was raw and controlled—restrained.

  “How’d he do today?”

  “He did great. Couldn’t stop smiling. Perfectly behaved.”

  Landon’s lips mashed into a thin line. Like he was upset that Logan had such a good time. Maybe he was just serious all the time. Or didn’t know how to smile. I tried to soften the mood.

  “That says a lot about his home life, you know? He’s never disrespectful and always jumps in
to help.”

  His slate-blue eyes locked onto mine. “Good.” He paused. Looked around and turned back to me. “Is there anything I need to work on with him?”

  “No.” I glanced up. “Honestly, he’s doing just about perfect as far as I can tell.”

  We both stared out at Logan talking to one of his classmates. He picked up the girl’s bag and handed it to her mother for her. His smile was infectious. He had to have learned it from somewhere. Kids learned from watching the people around them.

  Landon’s neck tensed. A vein popped out on the side, like he was grinding his jaw. A sharply cut, square jaw. His hair was the color of espresso and slicked back and to the side. He stood there with his hands in his pockets for what seemed like forever, like he was at war with himself.

  “Is something wrong?”

  He angled his gaze down toward me. Landon was at least a foot taller than me. “Just getting used to this.”

  “I don’t want to pry—”

  He looked like he’d started to chuckle and stopped himself. “Yeah you do.”

  My face flushed and I smiled. “Okay. Maybe—”

  He turned and looked me straight in the eye. “I’ll tell you more over dinner.”

  Lift off.

  I shot into the clouds. Head spinning. Where in the hell did that come from?

  I crashed back into the ground and turned to him. “I can’t date a student’s—”

  “Pick you up at seven.”

  Couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t if I tried. I held up a finger to protest, but my words caught in my throat and came out as some kind of jumbled gasp.

  “Come on, Logan.” He walked off before I could get a word out. Logan ran after him and he dropped a hand to his shoulder and squeezed. Then they disappeared into his car and drove off.

  What just happened?

  SIX FORTY-FIVE P.M.

  That’s what the clock read. I was a fantastic mess.

  I had it all planned in my head. He’d show up. I’d carefully, and meticulously explain why I wasn’t allowed to date a student’s parent. I’d explain why I shouldn’t date a student’s parent.

  Why are you dressed up then?

  I glared at the mirror and tried to scold my subconscious somewhere in the reflection. I wasn’t really dressed up, per se, but I was dressed up by my own standards. Levi’s, tight blue tee, white cardigan.

  Six fifty p.m.

  Nerves pooled in my stomach. I paced around the small two-bedroom I rented out. Anything to avoid my parents’ house. I still had some dignity left. New York City hadn’t stolen it all, even though I’d borrowed money from them for the deposit. It was going to be paid back within the month, though.

  Had he even asked me on a date?

  That was presumptuous of me. Dinner was a date though, right? Do parents ask teachers to dinner to talk about students? That’s what parent teacher conferences were for. That was the professional way for meetings to take place.

  Six fifty-five p.m.

  I hid in the kitchen and kept peeking around at the door. I stared over at my Rosie the Riveter magnet holding up the school cafeteria schedule. Rosie would’ve been so proud of me hiding from a man in my kitchen. Then it dawned on me. I hadn’t given him my address. I wasn’t listed anywhere. He had no way to find my house.

  I exhaled a sigh of relief. Then my shoulders slumped, and I let out a harumph.

  My back hit the wall, and my head tilted back and rested on it. I stared up at the ceiling and contemplated my entire life in a matter of seconds. What was I doing? Where was I going?

  The doorbell jolted me to attention.

  I peeked back around the corner. My door was glass, but it was the kind you could barely see through—opaque. The silhouette on the other side was big enough to be only one person. Shit. He found my house.

  I inhaled every bit of my given name that I could muster and strode over toward the door. My hand rested on the handle for a few seconds, and then I turned it.

  Landon stood there, emotionless. “Ready?”

  I folded my arms over my chest and looked away. No way could I stare at him and get out of the date. “Look, about this—” I blew a wayward strand of hair out of my face and kept my eyes on the wall.

  “About what?”

  “I can’t go. Maybe we can schedule a meeting.”

  Then I made the mistake of all mistakes. My eyes darted over to him. I stared at his biceps, his face, his eyes. God, just pick me up over your shoulder and haul me out of the house. He had on Levi’s again, but they were less tattered and worked in. I couldn’t see his shirt because he had on a red windbreaker-type jacket, but it was tight enough to make out every contour of his upper body. It had the Under Armour logo on it. He looked like a football player. A big, beautiful, powerful football player, with slicked-back hair and slate-blue eyes like ice bergs. Ice bergs that held ninety percent of their mass under the surface.

  “It’s just a meal.”

  I nodded against my mind’s wishes. “I mean, I do eat.”

  He canted his head slightly to the side. “So do I.”

  I tried to look away and shook my head. Attempted to get back to reality and sound decision-making. “It’s just—it’s not professional. I’ve only been back a few weeks, and it’s just, yeah—”

  One of his eyebrows cocked up at me. “Why you dressed up? If you’re not going?”

  “I was already wearing this.”

  “Sure.” He smirked. “Come on.” He opened the door farther but didn’t step inside. He just held out a hand.

  It was commanding, but at the same time still my decision. And there was something ridiculously hot about that. My brain told me it was a horrible idea.

  I took his hand.

  DESIRE DIDN’T HAVE MANY CHOICES for dinner—a diner, a pizza place, and a Mexican restaurant. That was pretty much it. All on one main strip. We walked past each place. They all had character. It was a nice thing about Desire, I supposed. Too small for the big chains to move in. Everything was mom and pop.

  He held the door open at Hal’s Diner and his free hand went to the small of my back. My breath left my body. He was so gentle, yet hard as a rock at the same time. Landon Lane was a ticking time bomb.

  There was a sign up front that said SEAT YOURSELF. We walked back to a booth in the corner. Landon folded his huge frame in half and slid in across from me. He filled the whole side by himself, and his shoulders were almost as broad as the table. I’d never really processed how large he was until then. Menus were already laid out in front of us.

  A few heads turned in our direction. There were maybe ten people in the place. It was ninety-nine cent enchilada night at El Charito. I had a feeling it was why he chose the diner. He knew it’d be empty. If there was one thing I’d noticed about Landon Lane, it was that he avoided people whenever possible.

  In the brief period I’d known him, he’d always seemed extremely reserved and calculated. It was why I’d nearly lost my mind when he’d asked me to dinner. Cautious was an understatement with him.

  The waitress walked up to us wearing a red checkered apron and she had a pencil tucked behind her ear. “Can I get you guys some drinks?”

  “Coffee.” I looked over at Landon.

  “Milk.”

  The waitress scurried off. Milk? Interesting.

  Landon propped his elbows on the table. “I can’t tell you everything.” He stared out the window. “About my initial reluctance to send Logan back to school.”

  “I understand.”

  “No, you don’t.”

  He was so direct and to the point about everything. Almost awkward. Like he’d been trained to interact with people. My face heated a little, but I couldn’t get too mad because he was right. I was just trying to be polite.

  “Well, you brought me here. So there must be something on your mind.”

  He turned and looked at me like he was trying to understand my thoughts. I didn’t know if I wanted Landon to be able to read my
mind.

  “It’s complicated.”

  “Life’s complicated.”

  He sighed. “That’s the truth.”

  The waitress returned. She sat a giant glass of frosted milk in front of Landon. Coffee in front of me. “You ready to order?”

  “Just drinks for now. Don’t want anyone getting the wrong idea.” Landon’s eyes rolled over in my direction. He almost looked like he might grin. Was it a joke? Was that even possible for Landon? I thought about kicking him in the shin under the table. The waitress huffed and walked away.

  “Are you enjoying yourself?” I raised my eyebrows.

  “Yes.”

  I waved my hand forward. “So, you were saying—”

  “I need to know Logan is safe. Making an enemy of his teacher isn’t the best way for me to guarantee his safety.”

  “So that’s why we’re here? You want us to be friends? For me to give Logan special attention?”

  He shook his head. “You don’t have to be my friend. And he doesn’t need any favors in the classroom. I just need to know if you notice anything out of the ordinary, at the school.”

  “What does that mean? Watch for second graders that might be double agents?”

  His jaw tightened. “Maybe this was a bad idea.”

  What is with him?

  I reached across and grabbed his hand. It was a natural reaction. One that I used with students to set them at ease. Work habits sometimes bled over into my personal life, and I’d been accused more than once of treating adults like students.

  I didn’t regret it this time, though. A spark of electricity shot through my limbs when our skin met. I let my hand linger a little longer than it should have, and then pulled it back quickly like I’d just realized what I was doing.

  “Sorry. Instinct.” I paused. “I will look after him. The same way I look after all my kids. It’s a school. There are security measures in place.”

  Landon nodded. Concern still filled his eyes. “Okay.”

  I didn’t know what he was looking for. I didn’t know what the hell I was doing. My whole body tensed because everything about this whole thing was just that—tense and awkward. Like he wanted to tell me things, but held everything back. It was familiar to me.