Until Next Time

by Dell, Justine

  “True. Word is that Del is coming back to celebrate his brother’s marriage.”

  “What?”

  A full-bellied laugh echoed down the hallway. “Yeah, that’s what I thought. Grandpa called Del when you and Piper were in Vegas, and I think the boy got the wrong idea. He knows you aren’t married—now—but he didn’t when he requested the leave. He’s not the type to take back the request, you know.”

  Quinn rolled his eyes. “Of course not. So now he’s going to come home and give me grief.”

  “That’s our boy.”

  Speaking of Vegas, Quinn hadn’t got the chance to discuss what really happened between him and Piper with his grandpa. He’d only briefly mentioned that Piper had taken the lead and had done a wonderful job. He’d lied, which he felt terrible about.

  Before they finished moving the stuff out of the house, Quinn had to set the record straight.

  “Go ahead and take that box to the truck,” Quinn said, nodding toward the front door. “I want to talk to Grandpa before we head out.”

  “Got it.”

  With that, the men separated, and Quinn went in search of his grandpa. As he walked through the empty halls of the house, a box still in his grip, he heard his grandpa’s voice drift out of the dining room.

  As he stepped closer, he heard another unmistakable voice.

  Piper.

  He inched close to the partially open door, holding his breath…and listened.

  “Thank you for stopping, Piper,” his grandpa said. “I appreciate the update on the conference. Macy has been a little odd about the whole week.”

  “Oh, well, I imagine it’s because Vegas was a big shock to him. He met lots of people in a field that’s somewhat…different than what he’s used to.”

  “That’s not what I meant, dear. Macy mentioned it went well, that you took the reins, per se, and did a wonderful job. But he didn’t quite get into specifics about the reception. When he got home after the week, he seemed distracted.”

  “The week?” Piper’s voice went up an octave. “The whole week?”

  Grandpa chuckled. “Yes, dear. Why do you make it sound so odd?”

  Quinn cringed. He knew why it sounded odd. After he’d left Piper’s room, he hadn’t come home. He’d stayed in Vegas, hoping Piper would change her mind, hoping she’d call. She hadn’t. On the final day, he’d changed his flight to leave a few hours before her, his sense of loss swamping him. But he’d had plenty of time to think over what Piper had said. Even though the giant hole in his heart was growing deeper each day, he couldn’t give Piper what she needed. That was plain and simple.

  So far he’d only told his brother about him and Piper. He hadn’t had the guts to tell his grandpa, who thought so well of Piper.

  “Oh, it’s…” Her voice drifted off. “Nothing, George. It’s nothing. The reception went wonderfully, as you can imagine. After telling everyone about your foundation, the need was immediate and people said they’d wished there was something around like this a long time ago. I’m sure your foundation is getting applications as we speak.”

  “Wonderful!”

  “And I imagine that you’ll even have a few more donors, as well. I didn’t realize how many people in my field are veterans, and several of them mentioned contacting you to set up a donation.”

  “That’s more than I could have asked for, Piper. Much more.” The pride in his grandpa’s voice was evident.

  Quinn mentally smacked himself for letting his grandpa down…even though the man didn’t know it. No matter the differences he and Piper had, he should have stayed in Vegas and talked about the foundation near and dear to his family’s heart. It seemed that his judgment had gone down the drain when Piper had given him the ultimatum.

  “Anytime, George.”

  Quinn heard shuffling in the room and jerked back from the door as it slid open.

  “Macy!” Grandpa’s face was beaming. “We were just talking about you.”

  He did his best to keep his face stoic, but he was clutching the box for dear life. “Oh, really?”

  He dared cast a glance at Piper. She was giving him a beautiful smile. Not any smile…a smile that said I missed you.

  “She was giving me all the details about the conference that you’ve neglected to tell me about—”

  “Listen, Grandpa…about that—”

  Piper’s hand shot out and clasped around Quinn’s elbow. “He did wonderfully, George. You should be proud of him.”

  “Piper, don’t.”

  Her eyes narrowed briefly, and her grip loosened.

  “I wasn’t there, Grandpa,” Quinn said. He cleared his throat and spilled his guts. “I didn’t want to tell you because you were so fond of Piper, but she and I separated at the conference and we opted to let her do the presentation by herself. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you the truth. And I’m sorry I let you down.”

  Grandpa blinked, his eyes darting between the two of them. He reached out and patted Quinn gently on the cheek. “You don’t think I realized that moment you came home, son?”

  “I…” What could he say?

  “It was plainly written on your face. I’ve been waiting for you to tell me. You’ve been hanging around here all week when I knew darn good and well you should’ve been with Piper.” His eyes continued to dance between them. “And it looks as though you two could use a talk. I’ll get out of your way. Come and see me when you get done, Macy.”

  “Yes, sir.”

  Grandpa strolled down the hallway, his limp more prominent than Quinn remembered it. When he disappeared around the corner at the end of the hall, Quinn realized that he and Piper were alone for the first time since Vegas.

  Warily, he slid his gaze to hers. She looked glowing dressed down in jeans and a yellow tee, but Quinn couldn’t pin down the emotion flashing in her eyes.

  “You didn’t tell him?” she asked, crossing her arms across her chest.

  “No.”

  “Afraid to let him down?”

  “Yes.”

  “Were you ever going to tell him?”

  “Yes.”

  “When?”

  “Eventually.”

  Her arms unfolded. “Am I going to get more than one-word responses from you?”

  “Is there something you need from me, Piper? I’m in the middle of something.” He jangled the box at his side. He didn’t mean to be rude, but he couldn’t stand being in the hallway with her. Couldn’t stand the soft features of her face, how her hair bounced as she talked. How he wanted everything to work out between them, but knew he couldn’t. He couldn’t give her everything and she deserved that. She’d done the thing right thing by walking away from him.

  Her brow furrowed. “Yes, actually, there is something I want from you.”

  Before Quinn could blink, Piper’s lips were on his. Hot, silky smooth, and demanding. The box he’d held crashed to floor as he groaned and wrapped his arms around her. God, he missed the feel of her. Her floral scent, her spicy taste. It surrounded him, engulfed him, and made him want to do things in the hallway he shouldn’t have been thinking about.

  The pain in his chest grew as she took the kiss deeper, probing for the emotions he knew she would find. Hopeless love that had no means to an end. Desperate needs that couldn’t commit.

  “Piper.” At first his voice murmured against their tangled lips, but as her body curled itself around him, as his erection throbbed painfully in his jeans, Quinn fought for a clearer head.

  “Piper.” His voice held more strength, even though his hands were making their way over every inch of her backside.

  “I’ve missed you, Quinn.” Her words splintered what was left of his control. One hand dove into her hair as the other cupped the back of her neck. He pressed her against the wall, enjoying the wiggle of her hips against him. He groaned as tongues twisted, breaths exchanged, and sparks erupted from limb to limb. He was instantly lit on fire by her flames.

  With everything he had, he tore
himself away from her. Her eyes were dilated, her lips a lush, plump pink. After two weeks, the feelings were still there, still as strong as they had been. A desire that ran so deep, Quinn knew, he’d never escape it.

  With a strangled voice, he asked, “Why did you do that, Piper? I thought—”

  She shook her head, her hair falling over her eyes. “I wanted to talk.”

  He’d almost taken her on the floor in his grandpa’s house. He rubbed a hand over his tense face.

  “I thought you were done with me in Vegas.”

  She gave him a tentative smile. “That’s what I wanted to talk about,” she said. “I made a mistake, Quinn. I was going to come and see you as soon as I left here. But since you’re here…can we talk now?”

  A lump caught in his throat. She’d made a mistake?

  “I’m sorry, Piper, I’m confused. Come and sit down.” He gestured toward the living room. She moved that way, her tennis shoes silent across the floor. Her hips swayed, and she walked straight and narrow, as though she was confident and cool. Which was far from what Quinn was feeling. He followed her, sweat forming on his brow. As she drifted in from of him, her floral scent wrapped around him, cloaking him with feelings he wasn’t ready to let go. Feelings he knew weren’t fair.

  Piper perched herself on the left side of the plaid loveseat and locked eyes with him. “Sit with me?”

  He wouldn’t say no. So instead of doing what he thought was right, he moved next to her, his arm tingling from her touch as she rested her hand on it.

  “Before we go any further,” she said, her voice unwavering, “tell me why you didn’t tell your grandpa the truth? And where did you go after you left the hotel room if not home?”

  “Like I said, he’s fond of you. And I wasn’t ready to admit that I’d lost you.”

  She squeezed his arm. “I’m so sorry, Quinn.”

  “Don’t be. It was only fair of you.”

  “No, it wasn’t. Why didn’t you come home?”

  He slanted her a look, not sure if he should tell her the next part. “Because I was hoping you’d change your mind. I was right there in Vegas the whole time.”

  Her mouth dropped open. “I…I…”

  He twisted out of her grip and clasped his hands together on his knees. “You don’t have to say it. It was pathetic, I know. You made your intentions clear.”

  “No, Quinn.” She scooted closer, her warmth washing over him. “It was sweet to hope I’d change my mind. You didn’t want to give up…even when I did.” Her voice started to quiver the slightest bit. “I wasn’t ready to admit a lot of things two weeks ago. I never thought I could come face to face with the fact that I was head-over-heels in love with you. I said it—and meant it—but I still wasn’t ready to deal with it yet. I was terrified.” A shaky hand covered his. “I asked you to marry me before I could even process everything. I pushed you away…”

  “You didn’t push me away, Piper, you asked for what you wanted; there’s nothing wrong with that.”

  “It’s not that simple, Quinn. I didn’t ask for something I wanted because I wanted it.”

  “What?”

  Her head dipped. “I didn’t want to love you, but I did. I do. I didn’t want this. I didn’t want to marry you. I asked you because we love each other, and I needed to know if you loved me enough to break your rules. Like I broke mine for you.”

  “You mean you didn’t really want to get married? You used that as an excuse?”

  Tears glimmered in her eyes. “Yes. No. Dealing with this is hard, and I needed—”

  He jumped up. “Do you know what I’ve been going through these past two weeks? How heartbroken I’ve been?”

  She gulped hard, drawing his attention to the slender curve of her neck. She tasted wonderful there.

  “I imagine you were feeling just a terrible as I was. I made a mistake. I shouldn’t have asked you to marry me. I should’ve accepted your love and let you accept mine. I didn’t know what to do with what I was feeling.” She rose, carefully easing toward him. “But I know now.”

  His pulse beat in his ears. “What changed?”

  Her fragile looking shoulder lifted and fell. “I’ve gone two weeks without your voice…feeling your touch.”

  His jaw clenched as a memory of their lovemaking filtered into his brain.

  “I would stare at the thorny stem you gave me for hours on end and hold this…” She dug something out of her pocket and held it up. The Until Next Time medallion glimmered under the fluorescent lights. “Wondering if I let the one good thing that’s happened to me in over a decade walk right out my door without stopping him. Actually, I had done that, and it was my fault. I hurt, Quinn.” She inspected the medallion, running her fingers over the smooth face before jamming it back in her pocket and locking eyes with him. “I hurt in a way I haven’t hurt in a long time. Here.” She pointed to her stomach. “And here.” She pointed to her head. “But most importantly, I’m dying right here.” Her fingers touched the spot right over her heart.

  His pulse raged, threatening to make him light-headed.

  “I walked in a daze, a part of my life missing. When Gavin came to see me, all the pieces fell into place.”

  He tensed at the mention of the man. “What happened?” Quinn was barely able to push the words out of his tight lips.

  Her eyes went distant, searching for something over Quinn’s shoulder. “Do you remember when I asked you, when we first started dating, about being monogamous? About how hard it would be to date someone not like me and so easy to date some like me?”

  A tick started in his jaw. “Yes.”

  “Well, I was referring to Gavin. When we first met, I’d begun seeing you and he had asked me out. We are so much alike, it’s scary.” She turned away from him then, walking several steps in the other direction, hands waving at her sides. “It would have been so easy with him. I knew that from beginning. He would want what I wanted. No strings, no attachments, nothing.”

  “So why didn’t you date him, then?”

  Her head tilted over her shoulder, and she eyed him carefully. “Because he didn’t make me think like you did. He didn’t make me feel like you did.”

  Quinn rubbed his throbbing temples.

  “That became even more evident when he came to my house today and kissed me…” She turned back away from him.

  It was all Quinn could do to stay in one spot. He wanted to pace the room, he wanted to scream his frustration, he wanted to erase that picture from his memory.

  “But he showed me something I’d been running from…” Her voice was but a whisper. “He showed me exactly what you said another man would make me feel. Nothing. Even though I knew he would literally be the perfect match for me, I felt nothing. I didn’t want to feel anything. I only thought of you and the heat that I so desperately missed. The smile that lit up my life. Your eyes that looked straight into my heart. It was you, Quinn. I wanted you.”

  Slowly she turned, her sad, yet hopeful expression nearly doing him in. He could only stare at her beauty, her wonder and complexity.

  “I still only want you…no matter what that means.”

  He wanted to rush to her, cradle her in his embrace. Wrap his love around her forever. But he knew—more than he knew anything—that one day Piper would need more than his love.

  “Piper.” His voice was choked. “I love you. God, do I love you.” He shook his head, grief surrounding him. “Tell me what you told me the day we discussed love and marriage. The day you told me you didn’t love…”

  Concern flickered across her face. “I changed my mind—”

  “Tell me what you told me, Piper. I need to hear it again.”

  She drew her bottom lip into her mouth. Silence stretched between them as she shifted from one foot to the other.

  “Please, Piper. We have to be honest with each other about how we feel. About what we need.” His chest ached, blood raging thorough his veins at what he was asking. “I’ll tell you w
hat I said. I told you I believe in love. Wholeheartedly. That it’s beautiful and magical. It’s something to share with someone special and embrace them every day. But I also said I won’t marry again—ever. I gave my one and only promise to a woman who died practically in my arms. Before we had a chance to make a life, raise a family, hell, even live together.”

  Piper’s eyes went wide.

  “My love for her was pure, innocent, and young, but it was strong. My love for you is deep, mature, permanent, and every bit as strong. Stronger in some ways. Each of you holds very different parts of me. And I can’t let those parts collide.”

  “Oh, Quinn.” She stepped forward, but Quinn held up his hand to stop her.

  “Maddie changed me, Piper, and I can’t change the promise I gave her. That’s what I told you.”

  “I don’t want them to collide.” Her voice was a full on shake, threatening to make Quinn crumble. “I love you.”

  “I know. God, I know.” He titled his head and studied her pained expression. She wasn’t ready for this conversation. He could sense it…feel it vibrating from her. “Tell me what you told me that day, Piper.”

  “I…” She clenched her eyes. “I told you I don’t love.”

  When she said nothing else, Quinn spoke again. “But you did. You do.”

  “Yes.”

  “And what else did you tell me? I need to hear it. You need to hear it.”

  “After you told me you didn’t believe in marriage, I told you I did.”

  His feet quickly ate up the space between them. With his thumb, he wiped a tear from her warm cheek, his heart disintegrating in his chest. “And how was it that someone who didn’t believe in love, believes in marriage, Piper?”

  Her lashes fluttered. What he wouldn’t give to kiss away her pain.

  She cleared her throat and looked squarely at him. “Because I said if people were stupid enough to fall in love, hopelessly devoted to each other, they should make that commitment in front of God and their family…to be together…forever.”

  He drew in a slow breath through his nostrils. “And is this how you still feel?”