All of My Soul

by Jenni Wilder

  Ben and Tabitha were in front of us, standing as far into the roadway as their mothers would allow. Kennedy held Madison on her hip while she talked to Rebecca, Emily and me during the parade while Brian stood behind us. He seemed to be more focused on the crowd than on our conversation, but he was the only man in our little group for the time being and probably felt a little out of place.

  Most of the parade floats that passed in front of us were fun and entertaining. Every float was covered in four-leaf clovers, green and gold streamers, and rainbows with pots of gold coins. Most of the parade walkers were dressed as leprechauns, and the Irish Riverdancers were a huge hit with the crowd. It wasn’t as enchanting as the Razzle Dazzle Parade, but I think that parade would always hold a special place in my heart. That was the moment I met Lincoln, and my whole life changed.

  “Mom! Dad! There’s Uncle Lincoln!” Ben cried from the front of the crowd. Sure enough, the Blackhawks’ float was approaching us. It was a large flatbed trailer covered in green and gold with the Blackhawks’ emblem on the back towering over everyone. The players were wearing their jerseys and standing on top toward the edges, waving to the crowd. I recognized most of the guys, and it made me smile to hear the crowd’s reaction to them. Cheers and hollering erupted from all around us as fans expressed their love for their team.

  Deacon managed to find us first in the crowd, and he waved at Ben and Madison before pointing at Rebecca. Rebecca rolled her eyes but smiled and waved at him. Lincoln stood next to his friend but had yet to see us in the crowd of green. Deacon finally pointed us out, and when Lincoln’s eyes connected with mine, his face broke out in a wide smile. I smiled in return and gave him a small, shy wave. He waved back at me before ducking down slightly to wave at the kids.

  I wished I could run up to the float to give him a kiss, but the Ice Crew girls—hockey’s form of cheerleaders—were walking next to the float, blocking my way. A small voice in my head told me he wouldn’t like such a public display of affection either.

  Once the last float retreated down the street and out of sight, it was time for our little group to split up. Emily had offered to take the kids so the rest of us could go to Patrick’s bar for dinner and drinks.

  “We’ll both have a green beer, and I’ll have a corned beef sandwich with fries, and he’ll have the same as well as a burger with all the fixings,” I told the waitress as I pointed to Lincoln’s empty place next to me. Normally I loved the burgers here, but it was St. Patrick’s Day, and indulging in anything Irish was practically a requirement.

  The waitress raised her eyebrows at my large order, but I knew Lincoln would be hungry and would want the extra protein. The rest of our group placed their orders, and the waitress left. Brian became engrossed in his phone as Kennedy began quizzing Rebecca on her relationship with Deacon.

  “It’s not a relationship,” Rebecca said in response to the questions. “We had fun together at Lincoln’s birthday party, and he called me a few times after that but that’s it.”

  Kennedy leaned toward Rebecca. “Just how much fun did you have together?”

  I chimed in since I already knew the answer. “Well, I know Deacon didn’t sleep on Lincoln’s couch.”

  Rebecca shot me a look silently telling me to shut up, but Kenny’s eyes gleamed with this tidbit of juicy gossip. “You slept with him?” she asked my sister with a big smile.

  “It was just the one time. We were both pretty drunk. And like I said, I only talked to him a few times afterwards.”

  “How long has it been since you talked or texted him?” I asked.

  Rebecca shrugged. “Since you and Lincoln got over your little argument.”

  My eyebrows shot up. She was referring to the week when I didn’t speak to him after I found out he lied about having Mackenzie’s picture. “That was over a month and a half ago.”

  “Yup,” she said as she shrugged again.

  I furrowed my brows. Deacon had always seemed like a nice guy, but he did leave a trail of women behind him. Occasionally he would be at an event Lincoln and I attended, and he always had a different woman on his arm. Most of them had the classic model look. They were always super skinny, incredibly tall, and blond. They were the exact opposite of my sister. Not that she was unattractive by any means, but she would never be an underwear model. She had more important things to worry about than the size of her waistline or if her thighs touched when she walked. My heart hurt for my sister sitting next to me at our table.

  “It’s okay!” Rebecca said to me. I think she could tell I wanted to give Deacon a piece of my mind. “It was one night of fun. I knew that was all it would ever be the first time I kissed him. I’m not mad at him or anything. You’re both making something out of nothing.”

  “So it won’t be awkward between you two?” Kennedy asked.

  “I guess we’ll find out, won’t we?” Rebecca nodded toward the door. Lincoln had just walked in followed by his teammates Deacon and Matt and Matt’s girlfriend, Kailey.

  Lincoln’s eyes found me instantly through the crowded bar, and he quickly wove in between bodies and groups of people to make his way to our table. Everyone stood to welcome our friends, and Lincoln immediately came to my side to kiss me. Deacon, Matt, and Kailey were slower about getting to the table, and when Lincoln turned away from me to shake Brian’s hand, the three of them had just reached us. I was curious to see if Deacon would act uncomfortable around my sister, but as soon as he reached our little area of the restaurant, he made a beeline for Rebecca. He crashed into her, and his mouth was instantly on hers.

  Kennedy and I both gasped with surprise as Rebecca tensed in Deacon’s arms for a moment but then melted into the kiss. So much for avoiding awkwardness!

  Everyone stared at the two of them as they broke their kiss, and Deacon smiled down at Rebecca. They both must have realized at the same time that we were all staring at them. They turned to us, and Rebecca’s face went red, but Deacon didn’t look the least bit ashamed.

  “What?” he asked, seemingly surprised we were watching them.

  Lincoln chuckled and Kennedy shook her head at Deacon with amusement. I smiled widely at my sister. For as much as she denied having any deep connection with Deacon, I think she had been slightly hurt he had brushed her off so easily. I didn’t know what was going on between them, but it made me happy to see that she still held his interest.

  We had been at Patrick’s for several hours. Empty glasses and dirty plates littered our table as we talked and laughed with each other. I was just finishing my sixth green beer and feeling pretty tipsy when the noise level in the bar dropped dramatically, catching my attention. I looked up and saw my brother and his partner standing in the doorway of the bar. It’s amazing how quickly two uniformed policemen walking into a bar can silence a crowd.

  “Rebecca!” I said louder than I intended. “Rebecca! It’s Elliot!” I stood up and held on to the table as I swayed slightly. “ELLIOT!” I hollered across the bar to get my brother’s attention.

  Lincoln was immediately next to me, holding me steady with his big strong hands. Mm… I loved those hands.

  “ELLIOT!” I called out again.

  “Shh… baby. He sees you. Stop yelling,” Lincoln said into my ear.

  I turned to look at him, but he was closer than I thought, and I had trouble focusing on his face. “Was I yelling?” I asked him with a giggle.

  Lincoln smiled at me. “How many have you had to drink?”

  “S’only five… six,” I said with a slight slur.

  “Maybe you should have some water, hm?” He offered me his half-full glass. I gladly took it and drank the remainder before setting it down and smacking my lips. I wiped my mouth with the back of my sleeve and smiled up at Lincoln. His eyes sparkled with amusement.

  “Hey everyone,” Elliot said as he and his partner approached our table.

  “Elliot!” I cried and scooted around the table. I collided with him and hugged him around his neck. When I let go
of him, I fell into Lincoln’s waiting arms. “Ow,” I said with a frown and rubbed my sternum. “Your chest hurts.”

  Elliot looked at me with surprise. “It’s my bulletproof vest.” He pulled the collar of his uniform shirt open slightly to reveal his armor underneath. “How much has she had to drink?” he asked Rebecca, who was now standing next to me.

  “Oh, stop. She’s fine.” Rebecca had clearly not imbibed as much as I had.

  “Wait. Wait. Wait,” I said and patted Lincoln’s hand that was on my waist. “Baby, have you met Elliot’s partner?” I pointed to the policeman standing next to my brother. “Oh, but not like sexual partner, if you know what I mean.”

  “Oh my God, Jillian.” Rebecca burst out laughing.

  Lincoln chuckled and held me tighter with one arm while extending his other one out to my brother’s now red-faced partner. “Good to meet you, man.”

  He cleared his throat and shook Lincoln’s hand. “Connor Kerbank. It’s an honor to meet you. I’m a big fan.”

  “Oh yeah? Well, anytime you want to go to a game, you let Elliot know, and I’ll get you some tickets.”

  “Really?” Connor’s face lit up with excitement.

  “Absolutely, man. My way of saying thanks for watching Elliot’s back and keeping us all safe.”

  A drunken thought floated through my head as I looked up at Lincoln. My man is so generous and amazing. I love him so much.

  “Awesome! My wife is going to flip out,” Conner said, interrupting my silent emotional moment.

  Elliot stepped slightly in front of his partner and frowned. “All right. All right. We actually came here for a reason.”

  I reached up with both my hands and patted his face. “My little brother. When did you get to be so serious all the time?”

  He pulled out of my reach. “Come on, Jillian. This is serious.”

  “What’s going on?” Lincoln asked as he pulled me back into the circle of his arms.

  Elliot sighed. “You should know Mackenzie was at the parade today. She was supposed to ride on a float for one of the sponsors of her beauty pageants.”

  “What do you mean ‘supposed to’”? Rebecca asked.

  “Because of your restraining order, she was told she couldn’t be in the parade since you were there. Apparently, she did not react well.”

  Suddenly the warm blurry feeling in my head did not feel so good.

  Lincoln’s arms tightened around me. “Did she threaten us?”

  “No,” Elliot answered. “But from what I heard, she threw a huge fit and was very irate.”

  Lincoln sighed and nodded. “All right. Thanks for letting us know.”

  Elliot nodded. “Of course. We have to get going, but I just wanted to check in with you and make you aware.”

  “We appreciate it,” Rebecca said.

  Elliot leaned down and kissed her and then me on the cheek. “Be safe,” he ordered.

  “You—” I paused as my throat tightened with emotion. Seeing him in his uniform always reminded me of the dangers he faced every day. Plus I’m sure the amount of alcohol in my system was making me even more emotional. “You be safe,” I told him seriously. “Both of you.” I pointed at Connor.

  “Thank you again,” Lincoln said to Elliot as he shook his hand.

  “Great to meet you, Monaghan,” Connor said.

  Lincoln shook his hand. “I was serious about those tickets. Don’t forget.”

  Conner smiled widely. “I won’t, man. Thanks again!”

  We all watched as the two policemen left the bar, and my head swam with the information they had given us. If Mackenzie was the one who was behind my slashed tires and Lincoln’s broken window, this was sure to antagonize her further. On the other hand, if it wasn’t her, then we just disrupted Mackenzie’s life for no reason. Not that I really cared about inconveniencing her, but it was a pointless effort if she wasn’t the one behind all this.

  “Maybe we should call it a night,” Lincoln’s teammate Matt said, breaking the silence that had fallen over our table.

  “No!” I said stubbornly. “I won’t let her ruin my weekend again. I was having fun. I don’t want to go home.” I hated how childish I sounded, but it was the truth. I never got to have fun like this, and I didn’t want our evening to be over.

  “Okay. Wait,” Kennedy said. “How about this? Should we move this party to our house? Emily and the kids are already there. I don’t know about Tabitha, but I’m sure Ben and Madison are asleep already. We can all go there and drink, and we won’t have to worry about driving. We have plenty of beds for everyone.”

  “Do you want to do that, Princess?” Lincoln asked me quietly.

  “Can we order pizza?”

  He chuckled into my ear. “We can do whatever you want,” he said and placed a kiss on my cheek.

  Chapter Six

  “Carter! You made it!” I screeched as Lincoln’s brother walked into the rec room of Kennedy and Brian’s house. I ran over to him and hugged him while everyone else shouted their greetings. “I’m so glad you came. Do you want something to drink?”

  Lincoln’s brother was only a year younger than me, but you’d never know it by the way he acted. He tended to be extremely reserved and quiet. He didn’t often join us for parties, and when he did, he usually left early and didn’t drink.

  “No. Thank you, Jillian. It’s good to see you too, though.”

  I pointed my half-empty beer bottle at the couple sitting on the loveseat. “You know Matt and Kailey, right?”

  “Hmm?” he replied, seeming distracted. “Oh, yeah. I know them.” He waved.

  Carter had met Rebecca previously but not my other sister. “And that’s Emily—” I started to say while pointing at my sister, who was talking to Deacon.

  “You know, I think I will have that beer,” he said abruptly, interrupting me.

  “Oh. Okay. I’ll get us both one.” I chugged the rest of my foamy drink and tossed the bottle into the recycling can once I got to the kitchen.

  I had lost some of my buzz on the car ride to Kennedy’s house, and the pizza we ordered had helped too, but now the beers were going down fast. I hadn’t planned on getting drunk, but as Lincoln kept reminding me, this weekend was for celebrating and relaxing.

  I returned to the rec room with two bottles and a bottle opener. After my fourth failed attempt with the bottle opener, I gave up and made a pouty face at Lincoln. He smiled at me with amusement and took one of the unopened bottles and the opener from me.

  “You know, if you can’t open your own drink, maybe you should be cut off.”

  “S’not my drink. It’s for Carter.”

  “Uh-huh,” he said dubiously. “Then who is that other beer for?”

  “Maybe I was getting it for my boyfriend, although he doesn’t seem too appreciative of it now.”

  “Uh-huh.” Lincoln clearly didn’t believe me, but he opened the bottles and handed one of them back to me.

  I took a long drink from it before I licked my lips and smiled at Lincoln, daring him to comment.

  “I thought you said that one was for Carter.”

  “No,” I replied and pointed to the one Lincoln was holding. “That one is Carter’s.”

  “Well, then that one is mine.” He pointed to the bottle I had just drank from.

  I took a drink and shook my head. “I said maybe. I decided I wanted it after all.” I gave him a big toothy grin, knowing he wouldn’t let that fly.

  He shook his head. “Unacceptable,” he said with humor. “That’s mine.” He handed the beer he was holding to his brother and took a step toward me.

  I giggled and took a step backward away from him. “Oh? And just what are you going to do about it?”

  His eyes twinkled with excitement. “Hmm… I could throw you in the pool.”

  Kennedy and Brian had a pool? I had no idea. They had a huge property, and I hadn’t ever seen a pool, but I hadn’t explored a lot of the grounds.

  I looked around ou
r group of friends and found everyone watching the interaction between Lincoln and me. No backing down now.

  “It’s a little cold outside for swimming, don’t you agree?” I stepped backward again and took another long drink from the illicit bottle.

  Lincoln smirked at me and stepped forward. “Keep it up, and you’ll find out.”

  I stepped back again and guzzled half the remaining liquid. There was only one swallow left in the bottle.

  “Give me the bottle, Jillian,” Lincoln demanded while trying to hide his smile.

  “No,” I said firmly and chugged the last gulp, finishing the bottle in record time. Ugh, I would pay for that later, but it was well worth it to tease Lincoln. A bubble rose up from my stomach, and before I could contain it, a large burped escaped loudly from my mouth in a very unladylike way.

  I slapped my hand over my mouth and giggled as Lincoln’s eyebrows flew up in surprise, and everyone around us broke out in laughter.

  “You’re going to pay for that,” he threatened.

  “Not if you can’t catch me!” I threw the empty bottle at him and took off running out of the rec room. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he would catch me. He was simply taller and stronger than I was, and he had also had way less to drink than I had.

  I only made it halfway down the hallway to the kitchen before Lincoln’s strong arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me against his chest, lifting me off the floor.

  I screamed loudly and laughed as I tried to twist out of his hold. I somehow ended up flopped over his shoulder, his arm wrapped around my knees with my head dangling down, my ass in the air. I slapped his butt through his jeans and screamed again.

  “Put me down!” I kicked my legs but he only held me tighter.

  He smacked my butt in reply. “Keep it down. You’ll wake the kids.”

  I looked up and saw everyone following us down the hallway, laughing and egging Lincoln on.