Mrs Collins' Lover

by Bronwen Chisholm

  Narrowing her eyes as she frowned at Anne, Elizabeth forced a laugh. “You are probably correct. I am certain the postmaster has felt your mother’s displeasure in the past and is always primarily concerned with missives to and from Rosings.”

  Her sister’s head swivelled from one to the other and her eyes narrowed in suspicion. “I am certain Mama wrote you of Mr. Bingley’s and my plans. She was most displeased when Papa refused to accompany us or to allow her to do so.”

  “Oh, poor Jane,” Elizabeth cried. “Does she continue to visit you frequently? Have you mentioned it to Mr. Bingley?”

  Jane sat taller, her shoulders drawn back regally. “Mr. Bingley has business in town which requires he be nearby. I have no desire to disturb the Hursts in London at this time, so we shall remain at Netherfield for the foreseeable future.”

  “I am sorry to hear it.” Elizabeth sipped her tea. “Does Mr. Bingley know how much longer his business might require he remain in the south?”

  Her sister turned fully in her direction. “What is wrong with the south?”

  Elizabeth frowned. “Nothing, I simply thought that, since Mr. Bingley’s family is from the north, he might wish to settle there. He has spoken so fondly of Derbyshire and Yorkshire, I only assumed …”

  “You believe we should give up Netherfield?” Jane asked abruptly.

  “Well,” Elizabeth paused and considered her sister. Jane appeared tired; little lines were visible about her eyes and her lips were pursed as though she had tasted something sour. Though the woman appeared much altered from her loving sister, Elizabeth decided to speak to her as she was accustomed to doing in their youth. “Yes, Jane, I do. I believe being too near Mama is not healthy for you or your marriage. As amiable as your husband is, I believe he will eventually lose patience with her. It is your responsibility as his wife to stand by him and his decisions.”

  “And what are your responsibilities, Lizzy, as Mr. Collins’ wife?”

  To say Elizabeth was surprised by her sister’s comment would not fully express her state of utter shock. The words which had left her angelic sister’s lips sounded as though they had been spoken by Miss Bingley. She was speechless.

  “As the rector’s wife, Elizabeth sees to the needs of many in the community,” Anne said. “She frequently visits the elderly and ill when they are unable to attend service. I was so pleased when she agreed to accompany me as I was still too ill to see to all the small details of running a home.”

  “And Mr. Darcy? Was he unable to assist you?” Jane asked. “Was there a reason that both were required?”

  “It was senseless for him to return to London when we were only remaining a fortnight. He has been quite handy, taking care of the baby while Elizabeth assisted me.” Anne sipped her tea, while continuing to watch Jane closely. When her cup was returned to its saucer, she raised a brow in her guest’s direction and smiled sweetly. “Would you begrudge your sister a brief reprieve from her duties?”

  “I would hope my sister would continue to follow the teachings of her youth and bring honour to her family.” Jane set her cup and saucer upon the table in front of her.

  “All who meet Elizabeth know that she is Christian charity personified.” Anne drew her shoulders back. “Why to live with that …”

  “Thank you, Anne, but my dearest sister knows me well. Shall we speak of Meryton? It has been some time since I have heard from anyone. Are the Lucases well?” Elizabeth refilled her cup and added one sugar cube, taking the time to stir her tea while attempting to suppress the anxiety which was turning her stomach.

  Jane’s complexion heightened. “I told you, Lizzy, several months ago that I no longer speak to the Lucases.”

  “But I thought … forgive me, I remember you mentioned some censure of Charlotte, but I had not realized …”

  “Charlotte Lucas has become most impertinent. A new family recently arrived in Meryton and she mentioned that it was a shame the only eligible man was advanced in age and my mother could not employ herself with arranging a match to one of her remaining daughters. I informed her I was not amused by her jest at my mother’s expense, but she simply laughed the harder.” Jane used her handkerchief to dab the corner of her eye, though Elizabeth had noticed no moisture there.

  Confused by her sister’s actions, Elizabeth laughed. “It sounds as though Charlotte remains the same since my leaving. She and I have often exchanged similar comments.”

  Jane’s frown deepened. “Perhaps, but I was unaware of them then.” She returned her handkerchief to her reticule. “To make matters more unseemly, after meeting the man Miss Lucas set her cap for him. I understand that he has dined at Lucas Lodge several times.”

  “Truly? And is he an amiable gentleman? What do you know of him?” Elizabeth was pleased to think her friend might be well settled and near her family.

  A look of horror crossed Jane’s features. “He is a widow with no one to act as hostess. Mr. Bingley has met him, but I have not. I am certain when we return to Netherfield we will meet at some dinner party or such.”

  Once again, Elizabeth was struck dumb by her sister’s words and was grateful when Darcy and Mr. Bingley joined them. Though coffee and tea were offered, Mr. Bingley declined and reminded his wife that they should leave for the assembly. The goodbyes were said, and the couple gone before Elizabeth was able to regain a bit of her previous equanimity. Darcy had clearly noted her discomfort and took the seat Jane had vacated when they returned to the drawing-room.

  “Are you well?” he asked as he took her hand in his.

  “I am,” she replied then bit her lip.

  “You do not appear so,” he pressed and looked toward Anne.

  “I believe she found her sister altered.” Anne stood. “There are a few things I must do before I retire so I hope you will excuse me. Are we still leaving at dawn?”

  “Yes,” Darcy replied, though his attention was turned fully upon Elizabeth.

  “Very well. Good night.” Anne did not wait for a response, drawing the door closed behind her as she left the room.

  “Elizabeth?” Darcy whispered as he lifted a hand to cup her cheek. “Did your sister say something to upset you?”

  She shook her head. “Yes and no. I was surprised by her … attitude. I fear Miss Bingley has become an influence …, but it is more than that.” Her hand was still held in his and she squeezed his fingers. “There is something overly righteous in her bearing that I have never seen before.”

  Darcy pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Bingley mentioned something of it. It seems that their attempts at an heir have not yet met with success. He shares your worries that being near your mother might be too much for your sister which is why he brought her here.”

  “I hope it comes to some benefit for them both.” Elizabeth laid her head on his shoulder as he slipped an arm about her.

  “Shall we retire?” he whispered. “Is there aught you must do before to-morrow?”

  She shook her head. “I will pack the last of my belongings after I dress in the morning, but I should check on William.”

  “Allow me.” He stood and held out his hand to her. Once her hand was nestled in the crook of his arm, he led her from the room. “I will care for him while you ready yourself for bed. It is the last night I am able to spend time with him.”

  Elizabeth rested her head against his arm. “You are so good with him.”

  They reached her bedroom and he kissed her forehead once more before she slipped inside. She could hear him enter the baby’s room. The nursery maid had been dismissed earlier that day with much gratitude and a monetary bonus. She and Darcy would tend to their son’s needs that night. Elizabeth changed into her nightgown and, feeling ridiculous, she slipped between the sheets and tossed about in her bed a few times before climbing back out and wrapping her dressing gown about her. She opened the door to the nursery but found it empty, so she moved on to Darcy’s room.

  The door was open, so she stood upon the threshold f
or a few minutes and watched them. Nelson stood by the dressing room door with Darcy’s jacket, waistcoat, and neck cloth over his arm, receiving his orders for the morning. His master lounged on the bed with the baby at his side staring up at him and babbling in the same measure as his father’s words. Elizabeth stood still, not wanting to be noticed and happy to observe such a scene. Once Nelson bowed and left, she stepped forward to join her men.

  “Here is Mama,” Darcy said as he moved further across the bed to make room for her. “We were just wondering what was delaying you.”

  “You were speaking to Nelson,” she said as she leaned over and kissed her son. “Your papa is a terrible liar.”

  “I thought it was Dada.” Darcy leaned across the boy and kissed her. “It is nearer to Darcy.”

  “He has not said it yet and we are returning to Hunsford to-morrow.” Elizabeth stroked the boy’s hair. “Was he awake?”

  “Yes. He was content in his cradle, but I knew you would want to feed him so he would sleep through the night.”

  “And you wanted to hold him.”

  “Yes.” Darcy sighed.

  “It will be difficult to return … after this time.” Elizabeth bit her lip. “I …”

  “Shh.” Darcy laid a finger upon her lips. “Not tonight.” He leaned forward and replaced his finger with his lips.

  William gurgled happily as he swiped his hands at them. One hand twisted about Elizabeth’s loose hair and he tried to pull himself up, causing her to break the kiss.

  “Little monster,” Darcy laughed as he helped her untwine the hairs from his grip. “You are to interfere with Collins’ attentions, not mine. I thought we had discussed this.”

  “Discussed what?” Elizabeth asked. “What mischief have you been teaching our son?”

  Darcy blushed. “Nothing too terrible. Only that I am the only other man to receive your attentions.”

  “Only other?” she asked, trying to hide her amusement.

  “Than William, of course.” He looked at the boy. “You are Mama’s protector when I am not about, yes?”

  The baby laughed harder and rolled over toward Elizabeth, nearly putting a finger in her eye in the process. “I fear he does not yet understand the word.” She laughed and cuddled him to her.

  William rubbed a fist into one eye as he tugged at her gown. Understanding the boy was about to switch quickly from amused infant to wailing demon, she bared her breast and he latched onto her nipple.

  “My G-d, I will miss watching the two of you together.” Darcy climbed off the bed and circled around behind her, so he was able to gather them both in his arms.

  Elizabeth leaned against him as he kissed her neck and whispered his love for the both of them. When William’s eyes drooped and he drifted off to sleep, Darcy gathered his son in his arms and returned him to his cradle. He left the door open a crack so they could hear if the boy awoke during the night, but quickly shed his clothing and joined Elizabeth on the bed.

  “Will you love me all through the night,” Elizabeth whispered against his neck. “I want to feel you inside of me. I do not want to think about to-morrow.”

  Darcy rolled atop her and did precisely as she asked.

  *CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE*

  The morning came too quickly for Elizabeth. As she lay there in her quiet reflections, she heard Nelson rebuild the fire before he slipped from the room. She could tell Darcy was also awake because his breathing was no longer as deep and relaxed. It was time to rise, but she didn’t move from his arms. A tear slipped unbidden from the corner of her eye and dropped onto her lover’s chest. In response, he rubbed her back and held her closer.

  “I do not want to leave here,” she whispered.

  “Nor do I.” His voice caught in his throat, sounding half strangled.

  An overwhelming wave of loss and misery washed over her, leaving in its wake anger and resentment. “I hate him,” she choked out through her tears. “Him and my father.”

  Darcy hushed her as he continued to hold her to him and ran his other hand through her hair.

  “No!” Elizabeth pushed away and sat up. “It is not fair. I was forced to marry him because my father did not do what was required of him to provide for his family. Papa was too busy with his books and his own enjoyment to exert himself to correct Mama’s spendthrift ways or invest in new techniques to improve the farms. Money could have been saved.”

  She felt his arms slip about her waist, but she would not be calmed. Elizabeth pushed him away again and stood to pace the length of the room. “Why me?” she asked the air about her. “Why not Jane? Or Mary?” She turned and made her way back to the bed, leaning over him. “Because I cared.” She stabbed her thumb at her chest. “I was the one who knew the tenants, the land, the intricacies of the running of Longbourn. None of my sisters cared, but me. And for this I am punished in such a cruel manner?”

  Her anger fell away as quickly as it came and she dropped to her knees beside his bed, shivering. Darcy stood and gathered her in his arms, returning her between the sheets. He climbed in beside her and drew the covers about them. Saying nothing, he kissed and caressed her until she succumbed to his lovemaking once more. It was not a solution and would not remove her bitterness, but it brought her pleasure for the present.

  The sun was creeping under the curtains when Elizabeth next awoke, and she could hear Nelson moving about the dressing room. She pressed a kiss to Darcy’s lips causing him to sigh and wrap his arm more securely about her. Gingerly, she loosened his grip and slipped from his bed. His eyes flickered open for a moment before he curled on his side and his breathing once more deepened. A sad smile teased the corners of her lips as his actions reminded her of their son.

  She wrapped her dressing gown about her and entered the makeshift nursery. William was just beginning to stir, so she gathered him to her and sat in the rocking chair to feed him. He was no longer completely dependent on her for his nourishment, but they both enjoyed this time in the early morning and just before bed. It was reassuring and relaxing.

  In no time, the boy was awake and had lost interest in her. She picked up a few toys as she carried him to her room. Once he was ensconced on her bed, babbling happily to his horse, she tended to her own needs. A quick wash and she dressed, finally slipping into the dress she had left unpacked. Meticulously, she moved about the room, stopping only to move William away from the edge of the bed, until she was satisfied nothing had been left behind and all was secured in her trunk. With the luggage ready to be loaded, she scooped up her baby and his things and returned to his room.

  This time, she settled him on the rug in the middle of the room with the things which would join them in the carriage. She was repacking his trunk when she heard him squeal in delight. A glance over her shoulder confirmed Darcy had entered the room and scooped the child up into his arms.

  “Da!” William squealed as he patted his father’s shoulder.

  Darcy laughed and kissed the boy on his chubby cheek, blowing against it to send the child into giggling shrieks. Elizabeth was unable to move. The scene before her filled her with both joy and dread.

  “You are awake.” Anne stood in the doorway leading to the hall. Her smile covered her countenance as she observed the family. When her gaze fell upon Elizabeth, her joy faded slightly.

  Elizabeth returned to her task, but soon felt her friend’s hand upon her arm.

  “It will be well, Lizzy,” Anne whispered.

  “No,” Elizabeth shook her head. “Everything has changed, Anne. It will never be well again.”

  As quickly as she was able, she finished packing and closed the smaller portmanteau. With his travelling bag also prepared, she rang for Timothy, Mrs. Carlton’s son, to carry their things downstairs. The family, for that is what they were, descended to find a hearty breakfast awaiting them. William sat between Anne and Elizabeth. A large serviette tied about his neck still did not completely protect his clothing. Elizabeth was apt to change him as Mr. Collins dema
nded the child be clean at all times, but Anne insisted he would get dirtier as the day progressed. Elizabeth realized she was correct and decided the boy should be changed as close to Hunsford as possible.

  Reluctantly, they all entered the carriage and began their journey away from the seaside. As before, the baby and Anne fell asleep once they reached the open road, or at least Anne pretended to sleep. Darcy slipped his arm about Elizabeth’s shoulders and drew her to him.

  “Are you …”

  “No, I am not well,” she interrupted him as she pulled away and looked out the window.

  They sat in silence as the scenery moved past them. Houses, trees, fields … they all blended into a watercolour of browns and greens through her tears. After some distance had passed, the driver took a turn and she noted the increased number of buildings. They would be stopping soon. A handkerchief appeared on her lap and she thanked Darcy before wiping her cheeks, eyes, and nose.

  Once they drew to a stop, Darcy woke the others and they all walked about the small village while the horses were changed. William found an insect making a slow path across a leaf and was fascinated by it; determined to follow its progress. Elizabeth was amazed by the child’s focus and amused by his father’s actions.

  “That is a beetle, William.” Darcy knelt beside the boy holding the child’s hands, so he didn’t try to pick the insect up and taste it. What followed was a brief discourse of all the elder knew of the creature while the child stared wide-eyed.

  Anne slipped her arm through Elizabeth’s. “They will miss each other.”

  “Yes,” she murmured.

  “I cannot help but believe God …”

  “I have turned my back on God, Anne.” Elizabeth could hear the defeat in her own voice. “Why would he favour me now?” Elizabeth drew away from her friend and turned back toward the inn.

  The footman handed her into the carriage, and she took the forward-facing seat after picking up the baby’s toys. Anne hesitated when she joined Elizabeth but did not speak. Darcy chose to keep the child with him on the rear facing seat. Elizabeth stared out the window as the equipage pulled away from the inn. She determinedly pressed the emotions bubbling inside her breast down until they felt like lead in her stomach. She could not meet Darcy’s eye or watch him play with their child. It was simply too painful.