The Shower

by Kay Bigelow

  Alex was tired of thinking about Lucia. And she was becoming way too stressed trying to figure out how to make love to Lauren without telling her about Lucia. Don’t I have to tell Lucia about Lauren as well? What a fucking conundrum my life has become. I finally find a woman I can love and even, perhaps, spend my life with, and instead of enjoying that I’m stuck trying to figure out how to tell each of the two women in my life about the other. Well, this is fun.

  She wondered if Lucia was monogamous. Well, not wonder, exactly—she was sure she wasn’t. Why would she be? Then what makes me think she’d insist on my being monogamous? In the five years she’s been my patron she has never asked me if I saw other women. Nor have I asked her about the other women in her life. Why is that? On my part, it’s because I don’t care whether she’s seeing other women. And on her part? Why would she care if I were seeing someone as long as I made myself available to travel with her and attend the opera with her?

  Her thoughts were abruptly interrupted when she sensed Lauren approaching.

  ****

  Lauren walked up behind Alex and put her arms around her. Lauren thought Alex felt so right in her arms. She turned Alex to face her, caressed her cheek, and moved her hand to the back of her neck to bring Alex’s mouth closer. After a moment’s pause, Lauren kissed her.

  When Lauren felt Alex responding, she ran her tongue over her lips and felt her lips part to let Lauren’s tongue enter her mouth. Alex tasted a little bit like the pico de gallo from dinner. When Lauren broke the kiss, she stepped away from her. Lauren was trying to read whether Alex would be willing to go upstairs with her, but she couldn’t tell. The only way she would know was if she took her hand to lead her up the stairs.

  Lauren held out her hand, and after a slight hesitation, Alex took it. Lauren led her to the stairs, and let Alex lead the way up. She was mesmerized as she watched Alex’s tight ass sway slightly as she climbed the stairs. Lauren closed the bedroom door behind them to keep Serena and Max out. Alex sat on the bed removing her shoes. Lauren’s heart began pounding as her blood raced through her body in anticipation of what was about to happen.

  As Alex stood up, she began unbuttoning her shirt. Slowly. Teasingly. Lauren could honestly say she’d never seen anything as sexy as Alex taking off her clothes. After she was done, she stood in front of Lauren. Lauren ran her eyes over the taut body in front of her. Every inch of her wanted to be touching every inch of Alex.

  Lauren was sure she was panting. She approached her and reached around to turn down the bedspread and top sheet. When she was done with the bed, she straightened up, and Alex took her in her arms and kissed her. In a moment, Lauren’s mind was fogged with lust. She started unbuttoning her own shirt, but Alex stopped her.

  “Let me do that,” she said, her voice low and gravelly.

  Lauren kept her eyes on Alex’s face as she unbuttoned each button at a snail’s pace. Lauren would have been happier if Alex had ripped the buttons off. But no, she was enjoying the tease. By the time she reached her belt and the button beneath it, Lauren was soaking wet. After undoing the last button in her way, she moved the zipper down so slowly Lauren wondered if it was stuck. No. It, too, was part of the tease.

  When the zipper reached the bottom of its track, Alex stepped behind Lauren. She ran her hands over Lauren’s back slowly. Alex put her hands inside Lauren’s slacks and boy shorts and began pushing them slowly down over her ass. She kissed her way down Lauren’s back, over her ass, and across her thighs before leaving Lauren’s slacks and underwear in a puddle on the floor.

  Alex pressed her naked body against Lauren’s. Lauren felt Alex’s breath on the nape of her neck as she lightly kissed the soft hairs there. She could also feel Alex’s nipples against her back, and the soft hairs at the apex of her legs against her ass. She could only hope Alex was as turned on as she was, because she was damned sure she’d come when Alex went anywhere near her clit.

  Alex put her arms around Lauren and ran the palm of her hand over her breast. Lauren had been sure her nipples couldn’t have gotten any harder, but when Alex’s palm brushed across her nipple it immediately tightened even more. Leaving that hand on Lauren’s breast, she moved the other down Lauren’s abdomen. She paused for a mere second at her mons before dipping below and running a finger over Lauren’s swollen clit. Lauren had to focus on not coming by trying to think about something else, but her mind couldn’t focus on anything but Alex’s hands.

  “So soft, so wet,” Alex murmured.

  Alex removed her hand, much to Lauren’s disappointment. She moved around Lauren and sat down on the bed. Lauren moved to stand between Alex’s legs. Alex kissed Lauren’s belly button as her hands caressed Lauren’s ass. She moved back across the bed and motioned Lauren to join her.

  Lauren moved onto her side and put her mouth on one of the two most perfect breasts she’d ever seen. She heard a moan so soft she wondered for a moment if it was her own rather than Alex’s. She moved her hand to Alex’s other breast. She barely touched the nipple with her fingers while caressing the other breast with her tongue. Within seconds, she could feel Alex pressing her breast against her hand, silently begging Lauren to do more

  When Lauren felt Alex moving her hips, she slid down her body, trailing her hands down behind her mouth. When she was between Alex’s legs, Lauren kissed down one thigh, then moved to the other to kiss her way up. When she reached the vee between her legs, she could feel the heat and smell Alex’s arousal. She parted Alex’s lips with her fingers and ran her tongue down her clit. Alex’s body arched. Lauren did it again and got the same reaction. She moved her mouth down and slid her tongue inside Alex, not far, just far enough so Alex could feel what she was doing.

  Lauren moved her mouth back to her clit and began to slowly stroke it with her tongue. With each stroke, Alex pushed her clit against Lauren’s tongue. She moved a hand to circle Alex’s opening. God, she’s wet. Lauren was so turned on she knew she’d come when Alex did without her ever having touched Lauren.

  Lauren was aware Alex wasn’t breathing as she slipped two fingers inside her. When she began breathing again, she started moving her fingers out so they were barely inside her. Alex moaned. “More, baby, please.” Lauren again moved her fingers deep inside her. As she quickened the rhythm of her strokes, she saw Alex clutching the sheets so tightly her knuckles had turned white. Lauren took her clit into her mouth and began sucking. In order not to come before Alex, Lauren put her mind to listening to the sounds Alex was making. She moved her left hand up to Alex’s breast to tease the nipple.

  Just as Lauren was sure Alex would come, she felt Alex’s hand on her head, pushing it away from her clit. Lauren stilled her hand. Does she want me to stop? Seriously? What the fuck? What’s she doing? When Lauren started moving her hand again, Alex gently pushed Lauren’s head away from her clit. “Stop, Lauren. Please.”

  Lauren did as she was asked. She stopped and slowly moved her fingers out of Alex. “Come here,” Alex said, and motioned Lauren to come to her. Lauren moved from between Alex’s legs and slid up the bed to lie beside her. Alex gathered her in her arms and held her tight.

  When she still hadn’t said anything after a few minutes, Lauren asked, “Are you okay?”

  Alex shook her head, and Lauren saw tears slowly making their way down her cheeks.

  “Alex, what’s wrong? Did I hurt you?”

  She shook her head again.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “It’s been so long since anyone has touched me in such a loving way.” She stopped and shook her head as if she couldn’t go on.

  “Tell me what else.”

  Alex buried her head in her shoulder. Lauren waited until she was ready to speak, holding her close.

  “I can’t, Lauren, it’s too embarrassing.”

  “Love, I just had my fingers and tongue inside you. I think it’s a little late to be embarrassed about anything.”

  Lauren could feel Alex’s smile. “Okay,” she whisp
ered. She took a deep breath. “You have to promise not to laugh or anything.”

  Wow. What is she going to tell me that has this self-assured woman in tears and hiding her face? Lauren couldn’t even begin to imagine what it could be.

  “I don’t have orgasms,” she whispered. “Stopping you, that was reflex. Something I’ve done with every other woman I’ve ever been with. And it was something I didn’t want to do with you. I felt so out of control with wanting you I pushed you away before I realized what I was doing.”

  Of all the possible things she could tell her, Lauren expected that confession the least. What the fuck? Really? I need to say something, anything. Words failed her.

  After what seemed way too long, Lauren said, “Do you want to talk about it?” As if she isn’t already embarrassed enough, I ask her to talk about it? Good Lord, why not make it worse than it really is, Lauren?

  “No.”

  “Okay.” Lauren let more time pass. “Alex, promise me you won’t run away.”

  Another long silence.

  “Alex, my love, I’ve had other lovers who were non-orgasmic.”

  “Really?”

  “Yes.”

  “What did you do?”

  “Well, they were really good lovers so we enjoyed our time together.”

  “You’re not just saying that, are you?”

  “No, it’s the truth.”

  “What if this doesn’t change? Are you sure you want to be with someone who can’t orgasm?”

  “I want to be with you, Alex, not your orgasms.”

  “You won’t be angry?” Alex asked. “You won’t be disappointed?”

  “No. I won’t be angry. Maybe a little disappointed for a time. You’ll have to be patient with me while I adjust my thinking. Were there women who got angry with you?”

  “Some did. Some didn’t seem to even notice.”

  “They were damned fools,” Lauren said.

  “Thank you for being so understanding.”

  “It’s okay.”

  I wonder why she told me the truth. She didn’t need to. I may never have known it if she’s hidden it from others.

  “Can you stay the night?” Lauren asked, sensing that if Alex left now, she’d talk herself into never coming back.

  “If you want me to.”

  “Please. I want that very much.”

  “All right,” Alex said, sounding less than sure of her decision.

  After a few minutes passed, Lauren felt her relax. She thought perhaps Alex was falling asleep, but she clearly wasn’t because she began stroking her hand up and down Lauren’s bare back. She moved so her mouth could reach Lauren’s breast. She kissed it without touching her nipple. She removed her mouth from her breast and pushed Lauren onto her back. Lauren missed her mouth already, but Alex’s hand replaced it. She circled Lauren’s breast and brushed the palm of her hand across the nipple. She felt a pulse go straight from that nipple to her clit like a lightning bolt, and her body jerked in response. As Alex kissed her way down her body, she trailed her hand down the opposite side. Lauren wanted and needed Alex to make her come, but Alex didn’t seem to be in any big hurry to do that.

  By the time Alex’s mouth paused at her hip, Lauren was in a lust-fueled fog. She couldn’t think, all she could do was feel. When Alex continued moving downward, Lauren could feel her lips on her thigh. When she got to her knee, she stopped. Her hand on Lauren’s other thigh began moving up.

  “Breathe, baby,” Alex whispered.

  Lauren hadn’t realized she’d been holding her breath. As Alex’s hand moved ever closer to Lauren’s center and her clit, she raised her knees and spread them to make access easier. That, it seemed, was all the invitation Alex needed. Alex slipped one finger into her, then two. Lauren felt like she was surfing along the edge of a tsunami wave. When Alex moved her fingers deeper and then moved them until they were almost out of her, Lauren was mentally begging Alex to let her come.

  “Tell me,” Alex whispered.

  “Please let me come. Please. Please.”

  “Soon, love. Soon.”

  Alex moved her mouth to Lauren’s clit and stroked it with her tongue. Lauren was so very close, right on the edge. It took her a second to realize Alex had stopped moving her fingers and was taking her clit into her mouth.

  “Don’t stop, Alex. God, please don’t stop,” she begged.

  Alex started moving her fingers in and out. She began building momentum, which, in turn, meant Lauren’s own momentum toward orgasm was building again. A few seconds later, she was running on the edge of the wave again.

  “Lauren, come for me. Now.”

  “Oh, Alex.” Lauren came at ninety miles an hour with her hair on fire, and it shut down her mind. She slipped beneath the wave and knew she was drowning in her desire for Alex. She immediately had to have her fingers inside Alex, her mouth sucking on her clit.

  Lauren rolled her onto her back and Alex was as ready as Lauren had been for her. Lauren plunged her fingers into the dark wetness and took her clit into her mouth and began stroking it hard with her tongue.

  “Deeper,” Alex whispered.

  Lauren began fucking her harder and deeper even as she continued to stroke her clit with the same rhythm. Alex was trying to take all of Lauren into her. Just as they were both about to fall over the edge into their orgasms, Alex grabbed Lauren’s wrist.

  “Stop, Lauren. Please.”

  It was the hardest thing Lauren had ever done, but she stopped. She was panting hard and so aroused it would only take one more stroke inside her to come with Alex. And Alex had stopped her.

  Lauren rolled away from her and lay on her back, trying to regain control of her out-of-control body. She took two deep breaths so she could stop panting like a bitch in heat, but that was what she was—an animal in heat. “Alex…Alex, please. I need to feel you on me.”

  Alex quickly moved up Lauren’s body and lowered herself down. “Make me come again, Alex. Please.”

  Alex shifted so most of her body was still on top of Lauren, but her thigh was resting against Lauren’s clit. Slowly, she began moving her thigh. Alex lowered her head and kissed Lauren’s lips. When she slid her tongue into Lauren’s mouth, Lauren raised her knee so it was between Alex’s legs. Alex began sliding up and down Lauren’s thigh. Lauren could feel Alex’s wetness as she slid up and down her leg. Alex took Lauren’s clit between her fingers and began squeezing and letting go. Lauren could feel the increase in pressure on her clit and Alex squeezed harder each time. Lauren was again skittering along the edge of another orgasm.

  “Let go, Lauren. Come for me.”

  Since there was no way she couldn’t come, Lauren let go. She held on to Alex as she came. As her senses returned to their rightful places, she was aware of Alex’s hard breathing. Lauren knew she was turned on and close to coming. Again, Lauren quickly flipped Alex onto her back. She put her mouth on Alex’s breast and began sucking on it as she ran her tongue around the nipple. She moved her hand down to Alex’s clit and began stroking it as she increased the pressure on her nipple.

  “Please, baby, more,” Alex whispered.

  Lauren slid down Alex’s sweat-covered body and took her hard clit into her mouth. She sucked on it and stroked it with her tongue. She inserted two fingers into Alex and began stroking deeper and harder. For the third time, she knew Alex was close to orgasm. She didn’t stop what she was doing, nor did Alex stop her.

  Lauren felt Alex’s hand on her head, but Alex didn’t tell her to stop. Please don’t stop me. Please don’t stop me.

  Lauren felt Alex tightening around her fingers and heard her call out Lauren’s name as she came. Lauren paused, but didn’t stop gently stroking Alex to another orgasm, the second more intense than the first. When Alex finally did stop Lauren from moving deep inside her again, Lauren stilled her hand, but didn’t remove it.

  Finally, Alex whispered, “I need you to hold me.”

  Lauren moved to Alex’s side, pulled her into
her arms, and held her tight.

  Lauren barely stopped herself from telling Alex that she loved her. Barely.

  Alex clung to her and Lauren felt tears on her shoulder. When she felt Alex relax, she pulled away from her a little. Alex kept her head buried on Lauren’s shoulder.

  “Alex? Can you tell me what happened? Why the tears?”

  “I’m not sure what happened. I only knew I needed to come and I could trust you. The tears were because you would have stopped if I’d asked you to.”

  “Are you okay?” Lauren asked.

  Lauren watched as Alex pulled away from her, but only far enough to be able to look into her eyes. Lauren saw the love there. She also saw something else, but didn’t know what it was. Fear, perhaps?

  “I’m so falling in love with you, Lauren,” Alex said. Lauren saw tears forming in Alex’s eyes again.

  Lauren pulled her into her arms again.

  “You’re safe with me, Alex.”

  A little while later, Lauren wasn’t sure whether Alex was asleep or just relaxed. What she did know was that she needed water. She moved to the edge of the bed and sat there trying to decide whether her legs would hold her upright when she stood. She’d had some very good sex in her life, but what had just happened with Alex was way beyond what she’d experienced with anyone. Ever.

  “Don’t go.”

  “I need water, and so do you. I’ll be right back.”

  “Hurry.”

  Lauren returned with two bottles of water. She’d already drunk half a bottle and handed the other to Alex, who opened it and gulped down half the water. Lauren sat on the edge of the bed sipping from her bottle.

  She felt the bed move and Alex moved behind her. She put a leg on either side of Lauren. Alex kissed the nape of Lauren’s neck and pulled her gently back toward her so their bodies were again touching. Alex’s arms encircled her. She felt safe and wanted. She was also a little sad.