Enough

by Pacheco, Briana

  I grabbed my purse and hugged her goodbye.

  “Are you coming by the house soon?” I asked.

  “Soon.” She said looking over at Alex. “Your mom really likes him.”

  “When did–”

  “Last night. I called her and she had a lot to say about what happened this past month. Your mom said she hasn’t seen you happier. I have to agree.” I agree to that.

  I walked over to the door and turned back to Rachel. She smiled and waved me off. When we walked down the stairs hand in hand, I looked over at Alex and tried to see how other people saw us. Do I smile when I look at him? Do I look happy? Judging by the way I feel, I have to say yes.

  “Did you kick anymore trashcans?” Alex teased.

  “No, but it was fun. Maybe I can do it with that one.” I said running up to one a couple feet away from me. Before I could bring my leg back, Alex grabbed me from behind and turned me away from it. I turned in his arms and felt the wall on my back. “You should have stopped me earlier.” I said holing his eyes.

  “You needed to let out some steam.” He said shrugging. We held each other’s eyes as our hands connected on skin and thoughts turned rated-R.

  “I feel like I walked in on something private.” I turned my head to the right and saw Sophie leaning on the wall. “I just have to ask one thing. Tomorrow, after the audition, can we spend time at your place? It’s going to be nice out and we love your pool.”

  “Sure.” Alex said breaking the moment.

  We walked with Sophie until she met up with Zach then we headed home because I have to be seen and watched.

  The patrol car was still parked outside but no one was in it.

  I parked and went up the front steps. My purse is filled with all of the make up work I need to do for all my classes I missed so getting to my room is on the top of my list. All of it is due tomorrow and I’m nervous about the Victoria’s Secret thing. Great, I’ll have bags under my eyes.

  When I opened the front door, Officer Reynolds was coming out. “Oh, sorry. Come on in.” He said holding a coffee and a donut.

  “Was there anything out there?” I asked.

  “No. Everything seemed normal.” He said slipping past me. “I should get back out there.” I nodded and let him go.

  Scar popped out of the kitchen. “Where’s Officer Blondie?”

  “He went back out.” I said. She frowned. She likes him. I knew it.

  “Do you want to talk about David?” She asked.

  I’m going to dread this. “Yeah. Sure.” I said.

  “I’ll get everything ready.” Alex said. He took my purse, smiled at Scarlett and headed upstairs. Truly amazing, that man.

  I walked into the living room and sat on the couch. “I just wanted to ask you a few things.” I said. “If David ever came back, would you want to see him?” I asked.

  “No!” She said without hesitation.

  “Why?”

  “Because what he did to you and Mom. For all we know, he’s still the same person.” She said. That’s why she calls him David instead of dad.

  “What about my real dad?” I asked. “Taylor…should I let him in my life? I don’t know what to do because I don’t want him thinking that I’m trying to take him from his family.”

  “He hasn’t been in your life for eighteen years. You’re still his daughter but that’s up to you if you want to spend time with him or not. Just give him a chance. If he’s anything like Bryan, then he must be someone to have close.” She said.

  “You have a point.” I said. It’s true. Bryan is amazing. He got it from someone. So I should give him a shot. I should let my dad into my life and see what happens.

  Scarlett got up and looked outside. “It wouldn’t be weird to date a cop watching your house, right?” She asked. “He asked me out.”

  “Look at Mom.” I said.

  “Right.” Scar said blushing. “Now go do your homework and tell me what they say tomorrow. I want to be the first to know if my little sister is going to be a model or not.” Or not. “Hey, Em.” I turned around on the stairs. “What would you do if you saw David?” She asked.

  I can’t really think of anything. “I don’t know. Let’s hope that day never comes.” I said. He changed me. He broke me. He made me someone else. If I ever saw him, I’d be feeling too many things to know what to act on.

  Scar turned back to the window to stare at Officer Blondie and I went up to my room. I took off my heels, jumped into bed and took out all of my homework.

  It was around seven-thirty when I finished everything. Alex had to read a whole book and write a report on it so I left him alone. He didn’t see that as fair though. He wanted to take multiple breaks from reading and get to know more of me. My body to be specific. I shooed him away each time.

  “I’ll get things ready for tomorrow.” I said getting off my bed and stopping at the Macy’s bags. “You’re not returning anything are you?” I asked.

  Alex got comfortable on the bed and looked over at me. “Nope. It’s all yours.” I rolled my eyes, picked them up and brought them to the closet. Damn him. I called out a ‘thanks’ as I was putting everything away. He needs to learn that he can’t keep doing this to me.

  I got my outfit ready for tomorrow and then stripped down to my bra and underwear to study myself in the mirror. I put my hair in a ponytail and turned in different angles. Like all girls, I have to admit I have a nice body but I don’t know how anyone would want me to model for them with these wounds.

  I heard Alex get off the bed and walk into the bathroom. His eyes wondered and he saw me. I dared him to even think about it.

  I walked in front of the full length mirror then my phone chimed.

  Taylor: Emily, heard the show is going to have body art so you don’t have to worry about scars. I’m getting a limo so you can bring the boys from the other night. Boys equal fun. :)

  Me: Great. Can’t wait. Anything important to know?

  Taylor: Just bring yourself and work it. You’ll do great Em.

  I put the phone down and walked back to the mirror.

  I may actually have a chance.

  Alex came out of the bathroom and looked me up and down. I smiled and hugged him.

  “Did I miss something?” He asked. “You’re letting me touch you.”

  “I was nervous about nothing. The show is going to have body art so all the scars will get covered. All I have to worry about is being in or not.” I said.

  “I told you not to worry.” He said moving his hands down to my hips. I studied him a bit. I know that look. I have that look right now.

  “Doesn’t look like your reading.” I said pulling away from him and walking into my closet. “I want to see that book in your hands when I–”

  Alex turned me around and pressed me against the door, closing it. Oh, yes. I like where this is going. “Alex…read.” I said as his lips moved to my neck.

  “I am. And you’re body approves.” He said. Reading body language. Fucking smart ass. His mouth moved down to my breasts and I threw my head back. I’m an idiot for trying to keep our hands off each other.

  “I don’t have condoms in here.” I said looking down at him as he started kissing my stomach. Fuck, he’s fingers are already sliding up my thighs. I’m about to cave. “Alex…” His teeth grazed my skin as he got to my underwear.

  I’m already panting and he hasn’t done anything to me.

  “Don’t worry about it.” He said looking up at me. “This is for you.”

  I tried to grip the walls as he slid my underwear down and slipped his hand in-between my legs. Then his mouth took over.

  God! I don’t know how I was quiet but I managed.

  ***

  I pulled on pj shorts and a tank top and climbed into my bed with a fully clothed Alex. He didn’t let me touch him or take off his clothes. He wanted to do that for me and I fucking loved it. But I still want to do something for him. I’m feeling generous.

  “I think we shou
ld spend more time at your place since it’s big…and private.” I said. “We can’t really do anything here.”

  “And what would we be doing there?” He asked with a teasing look.

  I sat up and straddled his lap. After I planned everything in my head, I leaned down and kissed him. “More of this.” I ran my hand down his stomach and grabbed his shirt. I lifted it a little with a smile on my lips. “More of that.” I dropped my hand to his jeans and unbuttoned them. “Mo–”

  He turned me on my back and started tickling me. “I might be a guy but I can control myself.” Alex said biting me while he tried to tickle my sides. “Just know one thing. You unbutton this jeans and I lose any control I thought I had.”

  “Good. Because I want you to.” I said sliding my hand down his stomach, trying and failing to slip into his boxers. He grabbed my hand and gave me a challenging look. “Let me do this for you.” I said pouting.

  He almost fell for it but I bit my lip and he knew I was going to do for the both of us. He makes me horny as hell and just touching him will make me come apart in my own skin.

  So he tickled me harder. I know he wants to have sex. And I know if we start touching, he won’t be able to stop. I don’t want him to but my family is here.

  This is why we need to go to his place.

  I rolled off the bed with Alex still attached to my side. I squirmed and tried bending over a few times to get him off and I finally did.

  My brows furrowed when my heartbeat felt a bit off beat.

  Alex came up from behind me, wrapped his arms around my stomach and rested his head on my right shoulder while whispering sweet nothings into my ear. Then he started kissing my neck and nibbling on my earlobe.

  “Hold on.” I said pulling his arms from around me. What the hell am I feeling? I took a deep breath and touched my chest.

  “What is it?” He asked turning me around.

  “I don’t know. My heart…”

  He grabbed my hand and put two fingers on my wrist, my neck then my chest. “I don’t feel anything wrong.” He said looking me over.

  “I probably thought I felt something.” I said. He studied me closely then brought his hand to my neck again. “Are you trying to play doctor?” I teased. His face was serious. “Alex.” I grabbed his hand and walked him toward the door. “I’ll be fine as soon as I eat something.” That could be it. I didn’t eat too much today and I’m trying to attack my boyfriend. I’m just to excited, I have to chill the fuck out.

  Alex didn’t seem convinced but he didn’t feel anything so I must have been wrong. We went downstairs and ate with my family then went back to bed. I have to stop being lazy.

  I need to kick Alex out so I can get out of bed. Ha, I can’t do that.

  “I’m just nervous for tomorrow. That’s probably it.” I said when I crawled into bed and he held me like I would break. He then got up and walked to my iHome. Music played as he came back on the bed.

  “I love you, Em.” Alex said pulling me into his arms.

  “I love you, too.” Then I slowly grabbed the comforter and went under. He’s trying to calm me down. I’m too wired up to calm down. I honestly think I felt something but I don’t know what it was. “We were in the middle of something earlier…” I said straddling his lap. I leaned in and kissed him lightly on the lips. He hesitated at first but when I didn’t pull away and I kissed him harder, he brought his hands to the back of my thighs and pushed me closer to him. “I don’t think they’ll come upstairs.” I said.

  Alex pulled back to look at me for a bit. When he didn’t move, I unzipped his jeans. “Lose control, baby.” I said biting my lip.

  We got lost in each others bodies. I have no idea what time we fell asleep but we had an amazing night. That reminds me…I need to pick up some birth control. If there’s going to more of this, I need to be protected.

  And I hope there will be a lot more of this.

  28. In or Out?

  School was just like yesterday. Everyone was nice and said good morning, the teachers went back to doing real lessons and everyone went back to their regular classes. I was never alone though because Alex is in my first two classes, Tiffany is in all my classes, Bryan is my second and third class and Liam, Zach and Sophie are in my last class.

  There was five minutes left of school until the bell rang and we’re off to the audition so the teacher gave out the homework and let everyone have the rest of the time to ourselves. Tiffany and I pulled up next to Liam, Zach and Sophie and talked about Justin. He’s starting chemo so he’s going to be in a bad place for awhile. I’m going to be in a bad place for a while too.

  I got a text from Taylor saying the car was outside and waiting in front of the school for us. The bell finally rang and we went to our lockers. Surprisingly, I was the slowest because everyone was leaning against the lockers waiting for me. “I’m ready.” I said.

  Taylor leaned against the limo as we walked out of school. “You guys look great.” She said holding open the door as everyone got in. “School’s not locking the gate so if you have cars here they’ll be fine.” Sophie and Zach sat on the right side, Tiffany, Liam and Bryan sat on the left and Alex, Taylor and I sat on the door seat. “You must be the boyfriend.” She leaned over and looked at Alex. “I was close to Emily when I went to Wilks.”

  “How did you guys meet?” Alex asked smiling. I locked eyes with him but Taylor spoke before I could say anything.

  “At a party a few years back.” She looked over Zach and Sophie. “I missed a lot, haven’t I?”

  “Yeah.” Sophie said nodding.

  Taylor looked around the car and said, “We always need male models too if you guys are interested. Emily sure does know how to pick the hot ones.” That got a reaction out of them. They all looked at each other and shook their heads no. Modeling is not their thing. But I think Alex has had some practice. I have to find out.

  “We’re here.” Taylor said a few minutes later. The driver opened the door for us and I realized we’re in Downtown Boston. Taylor held the door of the building open and walked us over to an elevator. When we got in, she started the conversation again. “So you’re not into modeling but you’re into potential models?” She asked.

  “Exactly.” Zach said.

  She looked at Zach and Alex. “There’s no tension in this group?” She asked. I cleared my throat and crossed my arms.

  “Everyone got use to it.” Tiffany said for me.

  The elevator doors opened. “Just go through the first door on the left and I’ll let the secretary know you’re here.” Taylor said as she stuck behind with me and nodded toward Bryan. “I thought if you and Zach ever broke up, you’d be with him.” She said.

  “We both missed an important detail. He’s my brother.” I said.

  “What?” She gasped. “Well at least you got Alex.” She said smiling.

  I looked over at my friends before they disappeared in the room.

  “He is great.” I said.

  Taylor yelled over to a young woman behind a desk. “Cindy, my girls are here.” The girl nodded and Taylor led me to a room. It’s a bright white room with red chairs and a table with coffee on the side. Looks expensive. “You girls ready?” Taylor asked. I dropped my purse on the chair and waited for Sophie and Tiffany.

  “We’ll be back.” She called out over her shoulder. We walked across the hall and went into a pink room. “So your with Zach.” Taylor said to Sophie. “Who are you with?” She asked Tiffany. Taylor handed us bras and panties to change into. We each had a changing cube. A pink changing cube.

  “None. I’m working on Liam.” Tiffany said.

  I took off my clothes and changed.

  “He’s pretty cute.” Taylor said behind the curtain. I saw Tiffany and Sophie’s head walk out of their cubes. “C’mon Emily.”

  I walked out three seconds later.

  They didn’t say anything. “Just don’t look at them.” I said furrowing my brows and looking away. All my wounds are out
in the open.

  “Perfect.” Taylor said. “You three have stunning bodies.” Taylor walked circles around us and adjusted anything that needed adjusting. When she got to me, she put my hair in a ponytail. “Is the tattoo real?” I nodded. “Then show it off. I told Em the show is going to use body art so the tattoo will look amazing.” Taylor walked over to a shelf with heels. Taylor handed Tiffany and Sophie a pair because they’re in flats. “I love yours. You can wear them out there.” She said to me.

  Sophie and Tiffany kicked off their flats and put them on.

  “Ready?” Taylor opened a door that was in the back of the room and waved us in. There was a long runway from wall to wall and three chairs to the side of it. “You guys go up the stairs and wait there.” We walked to where we were told and stayed huddled together.

  “You two look great.” Sophie said to both of us.

  “You’re not bad yourself.” Tiffany said smiling. “I get intimidated by those boobs.” Sophie and Tiffany eyed me.

  “Hey, it’s not my fault–”

  “Sophie.” An older woman called out from one of the chairs. “You’re first.” This is fun yet nerve-wracking. I feel like we’re up to get slaughtered.

  “You got this.” Tiffany and I said to her.

  She turned and walked down the runway.

  When we were younger all three of us would pretend we were models and walk down fake runways all the time. We totally have this. Tiffany went second and I was last. I have to say we did a good job but I felt like when I was walking back, all eyes were on my scars.

  “Can you three get into a straight line?” One of the women said. We stood side by side and waited for whatever was coming. “I usually don’t agree on this but you three are perfect. Taylor did a wonderful job.”

  A younger woman sitting next to the older woman nodded and said, “I have to agree. We’ll be using body art for the show and I love how comfortable all three of you are with your bodies. If you’ll like to be part of the show, I’d love to have the three of you.” We looked at each other and held in our excitement. Fuck yes! “Taylor will give you all the information about the show and girls…” We looked over at the young woman. “Whatever you three are doing with your bodies, keep it up. You can possibly become Angels in the near future. You may now go.”