The G.I. Bride
Page 23
Then, two weeks after the film night, they were informed that Eunice had resigned. As far as April was concerned this could only mean one thing: Eunice’s pregnancy had been revealed and she was not allowed to return.
She discussed the situation with Mrs Teague as they were listening to the wireless one evening. The news was full of the war in North Africa and the Pacific, none of it very good, and Mrs Teague was worrying about the G.I.s – and Red and A.J. in particular – despite the fact that she knew they were still somewhere in England.
‘Bess says I should stay away, but I don’t feel right about it. She loves nursing so much, I just can’t imagine she’d give up all of a sudden. Although, being unmarried and pregnant probably means she’s not allowed to work there any more. Should I go anyway, do you think?’
‘You absolutely must, April. That poor girl needs friends right now, and though she’s done wrong, she’s suffering the consequences. Why don’t you cycle down there on your next day off, dear? Make sure she’s all right.’
*
So a few days later, on a cold, blustery October morning, April wrapped up warmly and cycled over to Eunice’s house. She was surprised to see her friend painting the front gate.
Hopping off the bike, she walked over. ‘Eunice? What are you doing?’
Eunice looked up at her, her expression bleak. ‘What does it look like?’
‘All right, I can see you’re painting the gate, but why?’
Putting her paint brush down, Eunice stood back. April gasped. Beneath the thin coat of white paint that had been applied, she could clearly see ‘Darkies Go Home’ scrawled across the gate. Fury welled within her.
‘Who would do such a thing? And why?’
‘Mother can’t keep her mouth shut, that’s why. It didn’t take her long to figure it out once I was living here. I’ve been sick as anything. And now she’s told everyone.’ Eunice’s voice ended on a sob, and April rushed to put her arms around her. ‘Where have you been? I’d thought you’d have come to see me before now.’
‘But Bess said . . .’ April stopped. She should have known. Bess might like Eunice, but perhaps her hatred for April was stronger.
‘Never mind, let’s go in and you can tell me what’s happened.’
Luckily Mrs Granger had gone shopping and so, over a pot of tea, the whole sorry story came out. It seemed that once she’d moved back, Mrs Granger had soon discovered her condition. She was insisting that if she wanted to stay living at home, then she must put the baby up for adoption. Then, the previous Sunday in church, she’d snapped when Eunice had had to rush behind a bush at the end of the service to be sick. Apparently, Mrs Granger had hurried after her and shouted at her.
‘Oh April, it was all so embarrassing. Everyone knows now, so you see I had no choice but to resign. They’d have probably sacked me if I hadn’t. And now all the neighbours just turn away when they see me, and . . . Mother says when father gets home he’ll not want me here. She’s still behaving as if he’ll be back any minute.’ She paused, wiping her eyes, then said more quietly, ‘Now I know how A.J. and his friends feel every day of their lives. And I’m ashamed. Of all of us, to think we can treat people like outcasts when they’ve done nothing more than love someone else or been born a different colour.’
‘Not everyone’s like that. The men in the pub did everything to help A.J. get away when Norm tried to get him arrested that night.’
More tears came at that. ‘Poor A.J. As if it wasn’t bad enough that he’d just discovered I’d been lying to him. He must hate me so much.’
‘What happened with Norm?’
Eunice shuddered. ‘It was truly horrible. He came round and screamed at me. Then he cried. Asked me how I could betray him like that. I never meant to hurt him, I promise, April. I just didn’t know what to do. He cut his leave short and left soon after. So now his mother’s not talking to me or my mother. Something else she blames me for. What if something happens to him? I’ll never forgive myself for this, April. Never. I wish I’d handled it all differently.’
‘I know you do, love. Do you want to come and stay at Mrs Teague’s for a bit? I know she’ll be happy to have you, and it will give you a break from all these disapproving stares.’
‘No, I’ve got to stick it out. I don’t deserve to have a break. This is all my own fault. I should have written to Norm and told him. I should have told A.J. And now he’s not talking to me either and he still doesn’t know about the baby.’
‘You need to write to him and tell him everything. He won’t get it for a little while but do it today and then see what happens. And don’t forget, Mrs Teague says you can stay any time. Now, are you healthy? You don’t look too well, to be honest, and you need to start thinking about that little baby. Your baby needs you to be strong. Have you seen a doctor?’
‘I can’t see anyone, I’m too ashamed. I’m about three months gone now. Perhaps you can be my midwife.’
‘But I’m not trained in that.’
‘I know, but you’re a nurse, aren’t you? You can do the odd check-up, listen to its heart and things, can’t you? Please, April. I can’t bear the shame of seeing anyone else.’
‘All right, of course I will.’
‘Thank you! You don’t know how miserable I’ve been thinking that even you had abandoned me.’
‘I won’t ever do that, I promise.’ Privately, April decided it was time to have a stern word with Bess, but her stomach sank at the thought.
‘You need to go. If you’re here when Mother gets back, she’ll only shout at you.’
‘Yes, all right. Come any time. And write to me. Let me know how you are. I might have to go away in a bit, but only for a few days.’ April explained about Theo, suddenly realising that she’d not told her friend about it before. She also mentioned her guilt at not feeling the same for him as he did for her.
‘Poor Theo. You must tell him. Honesty is always best. Just look at me. I am what happens when you hide your head in the sand and don’t confront your problems.’
April hugged her. ‘I know. I will.’
‘And tell Crawford too, won’t you? You don’t want him getting any wrong ideas.’
‘Yes, I’ll do that too. And try not to be too hard on yourself. You’ve made a mess of things, but you never acted out of malice.’
Tears sprung into Eunice’s eyes again. ‘I don’t think I’ll ever be able to put this right.’
‘Course you will. You can mend a broken pot, can’t you? It’s never the same, and it’s not perfect, but it can still work. There’s always hope. And now you have a brand new life that needs you, so you can’t hide away from any of this.’
‘I promise I won’t. I’ve learned my lesson. I’m going to be the best mother ever for this baby.’ She stroked her stomach. ‘Despite everything, I love this little mite. It’s part of A.J., after all. And even if A.J. wants nothing to do with us – and I wouldn’t blame him – I will spend my life protecting it. Mother wants me to get it adopted, but I won’t. I’d rather live on the streets than ever do that.’
‘It won’t come to that. And you’ll be a brilliant mother.’ April kissed her friend’s cheek and put her coat on. ‘Take care, won’t you. And don’t forget, I’m here if you need me.’
April cycled away, her heart heavy. Despite her optimistic words, she couldn’t see how this situation could end happily.
*
Over the next week, rumours continued to circulate about Eunice, and the news of her pregnancy was now out. As a result, April avoided almost everyone and concentrated on her studies. She’d heard nothing from Crawford, which disappointed her, even though she hadn’t really been expecting to. She did, however, write a letter to both Theo and the Osbornes, asking them to let her know when he was back so she could arrange some leave. She made a concerted effort to avoid Bess as well. She knew she needed to speak to her, but right now she just didn’t have the appetite for a fight, so rather than have to tell her about visit
ing Eunice, she simply stayed out of her way.
*
The day of her exam dawned, grey and rainy. Mrs Teague woke her with tea and toast in bed.
‘You didn’t have to do this,’ April said in surprise.
‘I know, lovely, but I want you to go into that exam relaxed and ready to do well.’
‘Thank you, dear Mrs Teague. I don’t know what I’d do without you.’
‘You’d do very well without me, as you’ve shown. But now that you do have me, I want to make your life as easy as possible. Honestly, April, I’ve been happier having you living with me than any of my other lodgers. If I’d had a daughter, I would hope she’d be just like you.’
Tears sprang to April’s eyes. ‘And you, Mrs Teague, have been the mother I’ve been missing for so many years. Thank you for everything.’
‘Tsk. Enough of this talk. No time for sentiment today. It’s all business, so eat up then get yourself to the hospital. And think, soon the major will be back, and all will be right with the world again.’
April smiled at the thought. She’d missed Crawford so badly, she couldn’t imagine how she’d managed before she met him.
Before long, she was standing outside the room where the exam was to be held with several others. No one said much, as they were all too nervous. But April found that once the exam began, her nerves disappeared, and by the end she felt pleased with how it had gone. She hoped she’d done well.
As they filed out of the room, April was surprised to see Bess waiting at the door.
‘April, matron told me to come and get you. She wants you in her office right away. How did it go?’
‘It was all right, but why does matron want me?’
‘I have no idea. Better hurry, though.’
April sped off and found matron’s door open, as if she was waiting for her. She knocked and poked her head into the office.
Matron looked up, her expression serious.
‘Please do sit down, Nurse Harvey.’ April did as she was asked, and matron looked at her over her glasses for a moment before continuing. ‘I’ve received a telephone call from a Reverend Osborne. He’s asked that you be allowed to call him back. As you know, I only allow personal calls in the gravest circumstances, and on this occasion, I think it’s best you call right now.’
April gasped. ‘Theo! Has something happened to Theo?’
‘I really couldn’t say. Call the switchboard and they’ll put you through. I will leave you in privacy, my dear.’
April picked up the phone with a trembling hand. Oh, God! She felt terrible. Had he died on the way home? She’d just assumed he’d get home safely, but nothing was safe these days.
Automatically she held the receiver to her ear and spoke to the switchboard. When Mr Osborne’s voice came, she whispered, ‘Hello’, then embarrassed herself by bursting into tears.
The vicar spoke gently and calmly. ‘April, my dear, please don’t cry. Theo’s not dead.’
Relief washed over her, and she swallowed hard, trying to stop the tears. ‘Oh, thank goodness. Then why . . . ?’
‘He came home last week, but he’s gravely injured. He’s . . .’ The reverend paused, as if collecting himself. ‘The letter you sent him the other day cheered him greatly, you can’t imagine how much. I know it’s a huge imposition, but could you come? It would help him so much, and if his time is to be short, then I know he would long to see you just one more time.’
‘Oh, Reverend Osborne, I am so sorry. And poor Mrs Osborne. Of course I will come.’ She was sobbing again. Her childhood friend, her dearest companion from her youth. How she had loved him when they were younger. And how she loved him still. She couldn’t believe that he might be gone soon.
‘Calm yourself, dear child. His mother is, as you can understand, quite overcome, but we are trying to accept the will of God. Good friends are with her every hour. And maybe there is still hope. Do you think you could arrange to come immediately? In case God calls him soon. I have spoken to the matron, and she was very sympathetic and accommodating, so she will give you leave.’
‘Yes, yes. I’ll leave today if I possibly can.’ She couldn’t see now for the tears streaming down her face. Oh, this war! How she hated it. ‘I’d better go and see if I can make arrangements, reverend. I will telegram to say when I will arrive.’
‘Thank you, my dear. Even though it’s in such circumstances, I will be very happy to see you again.’
The line went dead and for a moment it was as if time had stood still and April was standing outside the burning ruins of her home, trying to face the fact that her father was no more. She wanted to scream with rage. Why Theo? She remembered him as a sweet boy who had done his best to comfort her when her mother died. Then as the handsome young man who had stolen her youthful heart. If only she still felt the same.
Quickly she replaced the receiver and went outside. matron was waiting patiently for her to finish her call.
‘I’m so sorry that you have been touched by tragedy once again, Nurse Harvey, and having spoken to the reverend, I can grant you four days’ leave on compassionate grounds, starting tomorrow. You weren’t due to work this afternoon anyway, were you?’
‘No, no I wasn’t, but I’m happy to if I’m needed.’
‘Don’t be silly, child. Get off home and make arrangements and we’ll see you in a few days.’
As April rushed away, her mind was in turmoil. I wish I had loved him the way he wanted me to, she thought. But then, if she had, would it not make this news even more unbearable? She wasn’t sure that was possible, for now, as well as the grief, she was overcome with guilt. What would she say when she saw him? How could she tell him that there was no future for the two of them, even if he did survive? She determined that, no matter what, she would make him feel loved, and whatever the future held, she would face it as and when it came. It was all she could do for him.
‘Oh Theo, I’m so sorry,’ she whispered. ‘I’m so, so sorry.’
Keeping her head down, she fled down the stairs and as she walked out of the door, a voice stopped her. She’d not noticed anyone or anything around her as she’d left and had hoped that no one would notice her either.
‘Hey, April, what’s wrong? Are you all right?’ It was Bess. The last person she wanted to see right then, but when she saw the concerned look on the other girl’s face, the sobs broke out anew.
Bess put her arm around her. ‘April? What’s happened? Is it Mrs Teague?’
The fact that the only person Bess thought she had to mourn was her landlady made her cry even harder. Because with Theo gone, she was right. Apart from Eunice and her other friends, and now Crawford . . . No, she couldn’t think of him now when Theo needed her so badly.
‘No, no. I have to go to London.’
‘To London? But why?’
‘It’s Theo. He’s terribly ill and he might not recover. His parents hope that if he sees me it will help. And, oh, I don’t know what I’m going to do! He was my very dearest friend, and now . . . what if he doesn’t survive?’s
‘Your London sweetheart. Of course, you must go.’
‘He’s not . . .’ But April stopped. She didn’t have the energy to explain it again. ‘Yes,’ she said. ‘Him.’
‘You poor thing.’ Bess enveloped her in a warm hug and kissed her on the forehead. ‘When are you leaving?’
‘As soon as I can. Although probably tomorrow now. I’ve got four days’ leave, so I won’t see you all for a bit. Give my love to everybody. And thank you, Bess, for being so kind.’
‘Oh, April, we might have had our differences, but I would never turn my back on a girl with a broken heart. Go on, now. I’ll tell the others.’
Wiping her eyes, April nodded. ‘Yes, I better go. Goodbye, Bess.’
Somewhere deep down, April was aware of a niggling feeling of concern. Bess was not to be trusted, she knew that, but right now, she didn’t have time to think about it and all she could do was take Bess�
��s uncharacteristic kindness towards her at face value.
*
Getting back to the house, Mrs Teague was full of sympathy, and though upset, she had clearly decided that April needed practical help.
‘Right, you go and pack your things while I go to the station and enquire about trains to London. I will get you on the very first train I can, don’t you worry.’ She bustled away, leaving April in her bedroom, staring at the walls.
That night April mourned Theo, going over and over their meetings from the days when he made sure she was never left alone after her mother had died, to him playing his cello with such a look of joy on his face. And then she saw him, tall and handsome, wearing his cricket whites, striding out on to the pitch, waving his bat. He’d been so full of life, and so much fun. Those days they’d spent together, cycling through the London parks, going to the pictures, dancing and playing had been wonderful. They’d been children, really, but it hadn’t felt like it then. It had felt like true love.
She took out his few letters and read them over again, crying over his words. He really did seem to love her. She saw his face, lit by firelight and tenderness as he’d kissed her that last time. Even though it was not the same as her love for Crawford, she still loved him. Perhaps she always would. For what was it they said? First love never dies. And she felt sure that hers wouldn’t either. Even if she had made room for a new love in her life, this one would be with her forever.
*
Mrs Teague had managed to get her a seat on the six a.m. train to London the following day.
After a restless night, April washed and dressed and went down to the kitchen. There was no way she could eat anything this morning, so she refused the porridge that Mrs Teague had waiting for her.
‘I understand, my love, but you need to keep your strength up for the days ahead. At least drink some tea and take this.’ She handed April a brown paper parcel. ‘I’ve made you some egg sandwiches, and there’s a little cake in there too, plus a couple of apples. Be sure to eat everything. Now, get your coat on and don’t worry about letting the Osbornes know, I’ll send them a telegram today to tell them you’ll be there tonight.’ She helped April put her coat on, then gave her a hug. ‘Be strong, April. And know that this too shall pass. And don’t you worry about Crawford either. I know he’s due back any day and if he turns up, I’ll let him know what’s happened straightaway.’