“Not too slow.” She closed her eyes and lifted her mouth to his.
Chapter Thirteen
Kyle
* * *
KYLE DREAMT OF the dirt road that led to their trailer. He chased after his little sister. She screamed and laughed with delight until she tripped and fell. Daniel, help me. He woke with a start.
A woman slept beside him, curled into a fetal position. Lettie.
She was in his bed. Her hair covered her face and the covers were pulled up to her chin. He’d made a study of every curve last night, every soft and hard part of her. He warmed, remembering how she’d opened her body and heart to him.
After, she’d clung to his damp chest.
I’ve never had one before. I mean, never with a man.
Really?
Really.
He’d felt her mouth against his chest turn upward into a smile.
It was amazing.
Let’s have another then, shall we?
For the first time in his life, he hadn’t merely had sex with a woman. What happened between them went beyond the physical. She’d been so vulnerable that he’d had no choice but to match her level of intimacy. This love pulled him under like a strong riptide. No chance of escape. There was nothing to be done. He couldn’t stop loving her even if he wanted to. And he didn’t.
Rolling to his side, he watched her sleep. This is what it would be like if she were his wife. Every day he would wake up to her by his side.
She stirred next to him. He turned on his side to look at her.
“Hi.” She brushed her hair out of her eyes. Pillow marks had left indentations on her left cheek. He wanted to press his lips to them, to mark them with his own indent.
“Morning. How’d you sleep?”
“Fine.” She yawned. “I feel like I ran a marathon. Every muscle in my body hurts.”
He grinned as he recalled their athletic lovemaking. He’d never been with a woman as physically strong or flexible. “I have a newfound love for yoga.”
“I’m pretty fond of CrossFit,” she said. “What time was it when we finally fell asleep?”
“Just after one. Mollie was up at four, but you slept through it.”
“Lucky me.” She flashed a dreamy smile at him.
God, that smile of hers—so trusting and guileless. He caressed her upper arm. “How do you feel about morning sex?”
“I’ve never had it, but in theory it sounds good.” She flushed.
“Let’s test that theory.”
“If you insist.”
After he showered and dressed, he offered to take Dakota with him to do the shopping. The little guy was getting into his coat when Kyle noticed his keys were missing from the desk. He felt sure he’d put them there last night.
Violet hadn’t noticed them, she said as she popped a few pieces of bread into the toaster.
“The new house key was on there too,” he said. “But I have an extra pair of car keys.” He sprinted upstairs to fetch them. When he returned, Violet was feeding Mollie her bottle in the kitchen.
“It’s not like me to misplace my keys,” he said.
“I’m sure they’ll turn up,” she said. “It was chaotic yesterday.”
“I must have put them somewhere else and not remembered. I was distracted yesterday by someone. I won’t mention any names.”
She smiled. “Remember the day I came to work for you? I’d lost my keys that day too.”
“Maybe missing keys brings good fortune.” He leaned down and kissed her quickly before calling for Dakota.
When they were in the car and headed down the hill toward town, Dakota called out to him from the backseat. “Kale, are you and Mama getting married?”
“Why do you ask?”
“Because I saw you kissing.”
“Can you keep a secret?”
“Maybe.”
“I’m going to ask your mom to marry me. But I have to get a ring first.”
“Will you be my dad then?”
“Yes. Would you like that?”
“I sure would.”
Kyle glanced at him from the rearview mirror. Dakota gazed out the window with a dreamy expression. What did he wish for? What did he see?
“We’ll be a family,” Kyle said, more to himself than the little boy who’d stolen his heart.
“Kale, we already are.”
Chapter Fourteen
Violet
* * *
VIOLET WAS IN the kitchen when she heard the garage door open and then Dakota’s footsteps running across the floor. He burst into the kitchen and threw his arms around her legs. “Mama, we got a turkey—the most giantest turkey in the whole store.”
Kyle arrived with several bags of groceries. He dropped them on the counter and turned to look at her. His expression softened. “Hello, beautiful.”
“Hey.”
“We got everything you asked for. I’ll go back to the car to get the turkey.”
“Dakota says it’s a big one.”
“Wait until you see it,” he said.
After he left, she knelt on her knees to talk to Dakota. “I have a surprise. My mom, your grandmother, is coming to turkey dinner tomorrow. Isn’t that exciting?”
“I guess so.” His blue eyes widened. “Does she know me?”
“You met her last year. Do you remember her?”
He shook his head. His forehead wrinkled like he was suddenly worried. “Mama, Kale will be here, right? And Mollie?”
“Yes, we’re all having dinner.”
Kyle was back, carrying a big turkey. “This sucker weighs twenty-one pounds.” He plopped it into the sink.
“Kale’s strong, Mama. He carried it like a ball.”
“Hey bud, will you do me a favor and go play in your room for a little bit?” Kyle asked. “I need to talk to your mama.”
“Okay.” Without a backward glance, he scampered off.
He pushed her against the sink and kissed her like it was the first and last thing he would ever do.
Mollie’s cry came through the baby monitor. He laughed. “Mollie needs better timing. I’ll work with her on that. You keep that in mind for later. I can’t wait to do all the things I did to you last night all over again.”
The doorbell rang.
“Are you expecting someone?” Violet asked.
“No. Maybe it’s Lance. He said he might stop by and say hello.”
They walked together to the doorway. When Kyle opened the door, a young woman with hair the color of a copper penny and a light dusting of freckles on her fair skin stood under the light of the front porch. In her left hand she carried a walking cane.
“Hi Daniel.” A tight, shy smile lifted the corners of her mouth. A barely visible scar on the right side of her face spoiled her almost perfect complexion.
Beside Violet, Kyle flinched.
“Autumn?” Kyle sounded like his mouth had filled with sand.
“I wasn’t sure you would know me.” A soft voice matched her shy smile. She turned to Violet. “I’m Autumn. Daniel’s sister.”
Kyle seemed to have frozen beside her. Autumn was here. How had she found him? What would he do? Violet stepped forward and introduced herself. “I’m Violet.”
“May I come in, Daniel?” Autumn asked. “I came a long way to see you.”
“Yes, please.” Violet gently pulled Kyle into the foyer to give his sister room to pass.
“May I take your coat?” Violet asked.
Autumn nodded and shrugged out of a white peacoat. “The dampness works its way into a person’s bones, doesn’t it? What a lovely home,” Autumn said.
“We’re renting,” Violet said. She glanced at Kyle. His complexion had gone from its usual ruddiness to the color of white chalk. As much as she’d studied him the past few weeks, she couldn’t read him now.
“Our house growing up was the dark, small, and dirty variety,” Autumn said. “Very popular back then.”
Quick witted like her broth
er.
They walked into the family room. Violet turned on the gas fireplace.
“What a cozy room,” Autumn said.
“We’re terrified of all the whites and grays,” Violet said. “Because of my son. He’s three and perpetually sticky.”
Autumn smiled. “This would be a better room for a single girl like me.”
“Would you like something to eat or drink?” Violet asked. “We have some leftover pizza.”
“I’ve eaten, but I wouldn’t turn down a generous glass of scotch.” Autumn leaned on her cane as she crossed the room, bearing the weight of her left leg. With the aid of her right hand, she lowered herself onto one end of the couch.
“I’d like one too, Lettie,” Kyle said, his voice odd and strangled as he sank into one of the gray armchairs.
“Sure.” Violet scooted over to the bar and busied herself pouring them both a glass of scotch. Behind her, the siblings were quiet. Silence had a sound of its own just then, like the pained throbbing of a broken heart.
Drinks in hand, she returned to the sitting area.
“Did you fly here from Denver?” Kyle asked.
“That’s right.” Autumn hands fluttered in her lap. “You know where I live?”
“I do.” Kyle said. He didn’t look up when Violet handed him the drink.
Conversely, Autumn thanked her with a smile, then gripped her glass with both hands. White knuckles gave her away. Kyle watched Autumn like a man in fear for his life.
Violet hesitated, unsure if she should stay or go. “I should let you two talk. I’m sure you have a lot of things to catch up on.”
“Stay.” Kyle lifted his face to look up at her. “Please.” His eyelids fluttered ever so slightly. She knew that panicked, humbled look in his eyes. He’d had it the first night they had Mollie.
Autumn took a sip of her drink and closed her eyes for a split second. “This is just what I need. I had an early flight this morning and then drove here from San Francisco.”
Violet studied her. The siblings looked nothing alike, other than the intense way they peered at someone or something. Violet had once thought Kyle’s intense glittering stare was meant to intimidate, but she knew now that it was a deep curiosity from a man who remained an outsider despite appearances to the contrary. Under the designer clothes and expensive cologne, Kyle remained the little boy who gawked at the big white house and dreamt of the girl inside. When one was unseen and disposable and dismissed, the world was experienced through a distance, like a detective gathering information.
“How’d you find me?” Kyle asked.
“I read about the opening of Cliffside Bay Lodge in a travel magazine. They had your photograph. I knew it was you, despite your name being slightly changed. I’ve looked for you for a long time. This was the first lead I had. I took a chance I might find you at the resort, but your staff wouldn’t tell me anything. I decided to head into town and ask around. A woman at the grocery store said to head over to The Oar and ask Zane Shaw for information.” A flash of pain crossed her face. “It took a photograph to convince him I was your sister. He said you guys go way back.”
Kyle didn’t respond, other than to cross one leg over the other.
Autumn reached into her handbag and pulled out an old photograph. She deposited it on the glass coffee table and flicked it with her finger toward the chair where Kyle sat as still as a statue. “Fortunately, I had this one. He said he knew it was you right away.”
Embarrassed by his lack of response, Violet reached out for the photograph. It was of a little girl around two and a rough little boy of about six. She grinned into the camera, but the boy’s expression was stoic bordering on hostile. The way he glared at the camera reminded her of photographs from the late 1800s of people on the frontier. No one ever smiled in those photos. She’d always wondered why. No question, however, that this was a young Kyle. He had the same sharp features and dark hair. Unlike now, his hair was cut unevenly and stood up on one side in a ratted tangle. Both faces were smeared with grime. An old rusted truck behind them made a dreary backdrop.
“Where did you get this?” Kyle asked from behind Violet.
She jumped. Enthralled in the photograph, she had not seen Kyle get up from his chair.
“From the house after Dad died. I found it in a book,” Autumn said. “It was stuck in one of those paperback books Mom used to read.”
“You can’t possibly remember that. You were only six when she left.”
“I vaguely remember her sitting in that orange chair reading,” Autumn said. “Stone tells me about her when I ask. He said she read all day to escape.”
“Until she left,” Kyle said. “The ultimate escape.”
“Until then, yes,” Autumn said.
Kyle returned to his seat without taking the photograph. Violet held it for a moment before leaving it on the table.
“It’s the only one I have of the two of us.” Autumn turned to Violet. “Our brother Stone is between us in age. There aren’t any photos of the three of us together, unfortunately.”
Violet crossed over to the bar and poured herself a glass of wine. Afterward, she perched on the edge of the couch, unsure what to say or do.
“You look so different,” Autumn said. “He was always so thin.”
“The word is scrawny,” Kyle said.
“You wouldn’t know it now,” Autumn said. “The lodge is beautiful too. You always had a flair for making beautiful things out of nothing.”
“Isn’t it the opposite?” he asked.
“It wasn’t your fault,” Autumn said.
They looked at each other like two kids in a staring contest.
“Zane told me you have a baby daughter,” Autumn said. “But he didn’t mention a wife.”
No response from Kyle.
“I’m not Mollie’s mother. Or his wife,” Violet said.
“We’re together,” Kyle said hoarsely.
“Does Mollie have a mother?” Autumn said.
Kyle drank from his glass. “She died.”
“I’m sorry.” Autumn’s gaze remained on her brother. She must be curious, but how did one ask about the sudden appearance of a baby?
“Her mother and I weren’t together. I met her in a bar—it was a casual encounter,” Kyle said.
“I’m still sorry. For the baby, especially.”
“Kyle learned of Mollie’s existence after she was born,” Violet said.
“And you didn’t mind?” Autumn asked.
“I don’t mind.” Violet smiled to hide her embarrassment. “It was before me.”
“I’m sure it’s a shock to see me,” Autumn said.
“Yes,” Kyle said.
“You did a great job disappearing.” Two bright pink spots blazed on Autumn’s cheeks.
“You guys were better off without me.”
“We disagree.” She drank the rest of her scotch and put the glass aside. “Like I said, Stone and I have been searching for you for some time now.”
“Why?” Kyle asked.
“Because it devastated us when you left. Stone joined the Marines after high school.”
“I know,” Kyle said.
She looked surprised but didn’t ask how. “He’s had some problems since he got back from Afghanistan. Seeing you would help him. His psychologist thinks it would be good for him to have closure. Even if it’s only to explain why you disappeared out of our lives. She believes it would help him to move forward. He’s stuck. Depressed. Anxious. He saw things over there no one should have to see.” She pulled a card from a pocket and pushed it across the table. “Here’s my contact information. We’re staying at the resort for the long weekend. If you decide you’d like to see us and talk, we’d welcome it.”
“I’ll think about it,” Kyle said.
“Please do. We don’t want anything from you. We’re both fine financially. I’m a pharmacist. But maybe you know that too?”
“I do.”
“You’ve checked up
on us but haven’t given us the chance to do the same? It makes no sense,” Autumn said.
“The scar’s less visible,” Kyle said.
“Your money paid for a plastic surgeon.” Autumn placed her fingertips over the scar.
“They did a good job,” Kyle said.
“As good as it gets,” Autumn said. “After I got insurance through work, I had an operation on my legs. They reset the bones and used some pins and various other techniques. After physical therapy, I’m able to walk without pain. My right leg’s almost normal, but my left can’t take too much weight. But my friend here helps.” She wrapped her right hand around the head of the cane and stood. “It’s better than those awful braces. Remember those?”
A terrible darkness seemed to cloud Kyle’s face. “Do you really think I could ever forget?”
Autumn shook her head as if suddenly weary. “The Miller boys did this, not you.”
“I was driving,” he said. “I took that corner too fast.”
“They were right behind us,” Autumn said. “We were scared for our lives. Those boys tortured you for most of your childhood. Don’t forget that part.”
“If I hadn’t been such a pathetic loser, then they wouldn’t have come after me in the first place.”
“Daniel, for heavens’ sake, you were barely eighteen years old and taking care of the entire family. You were trying to protect me, like always.”
Kyle downed his drink and slammed it down on the coffee table. “Do you know how many times I’ve gone through that moment in my head? If only I’d done this or that or the other thing?”
“They were chasing us. You did the only thing you could do.” Autumn looked over at Violet. “The roads were slick from rain.”
Kyle put his hand out like a traffic cop. “We’re not doing this. I don’t revisit the past. Ever.” He leapt to his feet and headed toward the bar. “Seeing you is just a reminder of all the ways I failed you.”
“Is that why you left?” Autumn had started to cry. “Because you couldn’t stand to look at me.”
Marred Page 21
