A Mother's Love

by Katie Flynn

  She glanced tentatively at Arla. ‘D’you remember me tellin’ you about Aidan?’

  ‘Of course; how could I not? You banged on about him for ages, although accordin’ to you there weren’t nowt in it. Why?’

  ‘I never told you about the accident he had when he was a kid, did I? Only it’s left him with one leg a bit shorter than the other, so he walks a bit funny, and he uses a cane, like old Mr Rogers in Lavender Court.’ Sitting back, she waited for Arla’s response.

  Confused, Arla leaned forward. ‘What’s that gorra do with the price of fish? And why are you tellin’ me now?’

  Ellie shrugged. ‘Dunno, really. I s’pose I was worried it might bother you.’

  ‘Why on earth should it bother me?’ Arla eyed her friend curiously. ‘Does it bother you? But why would it, if you’re not inter—Oh.’ As the penny dropped, she cocked an eyebrow. ‘You are interested in him, aren’t you? In fact, I’d go one further, I think you really like him, and that’s why you talk about him all the time. I knew you were keen on him, only you got naggy if I so much as suggested—’

  ‘I didn’t get naggy,’ Ellie said crossly.

  ‘Of course you didn’t, just like you’re not gerrin’ naggy now.’

  Ellie’s shoulders relaxed. ‘I’m just confused. I don’t know what I want, but at the same time I can’t stop thinkin’ about him.’

  ‘Sounds to me like you really like him. Has he asked you out on a date?’

  Ellie shook her head. ‘But he asked me not to join the ATS and stay on the farm with him.’

  Arla’s jaw dropped. ‘You didn’t tell me that! Crikey, Ellie, he must really like you! Why didn’t you say owt?’

  Ellie shook her head in shame. ‘I don’t know. I thought mebbe you’d laugh or tell me I could do better’n a farmer with bad legs.’

  ‘You’re blaming me? You’re saying it’s my fault?’ Arla said, her tone unusually brusque. She sat back and shook her head in disbelief. ‘My God, you are, aren’t you?’

  ‘Not at all. If it’s anyone’s fault it’s mine. But you always said how you wanted the best for me – for both of us – and I thought I might be lettin’ you down …’

  Arla sat upright and glared accusingly at Ellie. ‘You are! You’re blamin’ me! Which is a bit rich, ’cos I only wanted the best for you, and if that meant you married a farmer with dodgy legs or a docker wi’out a penny to his name, as long as he loved you to the moon and back then that’s what I wanted. So don’t you go blamin’ me, Ellie Lancton. It’s not on!’

  Ellie looked pleadingly at her friend. ‘Please let’s not fight. I haven’t seen you for such a long time, and I’m not blamin’ you, really I’m not. There’s nowt wrong wi’ wantin’ the best for your bezzie, and I wanted that too. I’m afraid I’ve put things awfully badly, and I didn’t mean to.’

  Arla heaved a sigh. ‘I know you didn’t, and I suppose I did harp on about marryin’ officers and getting out of the courts, so I s’pose I can’t blame you for thinkin’ I might’ve scorned your feelin’s for Aidan. And if truth be told, back then I might’ve done, but we’ve both grown up a lot since then.’ She placed a hand over Ellie’s and clasped her fingers tightly in her own. ‘Let’s start again, shall we? Only this time, nothing but the God’s honest.’

  Ellie nodded thankfully. ‘I’ve been so confused! I don’t know whether I love him as a friend or whether I’m in love with him, an’ then there’s the business of what happened to me mam.’

  Arla frowned. ‘What did happen to her?’

  Ellie took a deep breath. ‘I’m the same age me mam was when she met me dad, and by all accounts he promised her the earth, the moon and the stars above. He treated her like a queen and took her to places she’d never been before. He talked of a fairy-tale future where they’d live in a cottage beside the sea and she’d stay at home lookin’ after the kids whilst he went out to work.’ Picking up the teapot, she lifted the lid and examined the contents. ‘But that never happened, did it? He were leadin’ her up the garden path just so’s he could have his wicked way with her. As soon as he found out she were pregnant he upped and left, leavin’ her on her own wi’ a babby to bring up.’

  Arla frowned. ‘What’s that gorra do wi’ Aidan?’

  ‘What if he does the same to me? He says I could stay at the farm, but what if he changes his mind? What would I do then? With no home to go to, no money behind me and no job?’

  Arla nodded. ‘Oh, I see! But he wouldn’t do that, would he? What would be the point?’ She paused momentarily. ‘Unless …’

  This time it was Ellie’s turn to frown. ‘Unless what?’

  Arla pulled a rueful face. ‘Unless he just wants you to help him with the farm when his mam and dad get too old to work the land. You did say he wasn’t a looker; mebbe he thought he couldn’t afford to be picky.’

  ‘Thanks a lot!’ said Ellie.

  ‘I don’t mean that there’s owt wrong wi’ you, just … oh, dear, it’s not goin’ well this, is it?’

  Ellie considered. ‘You may be right, though. What if he does only want me to help with the farm?’

  Arla shook her head. ‘Ignore me, Ellie. I don’t know Aidan, I’ve never even met him, an’ I shouldn’t have said owt.’

  Ellie shrugged. ‘I’ve only known him for a few months, so if it comes to that I don’t really know him that well either.’ She looked expectantly at Arla. ‘What should I do?’

  ‘If I were you I’d forget just about everything we’ve said here today, and go with your heart …’ She held up a hand as Ellie started to protest. ‘I know that’s what your mam did, but you’re not your mam, are you? Besides, we’ve both known Connor for years, and I don’t think for one moment that Connor would have taken you to the farm if Aidan was a wrong ’un. Blimey, Ellie, he treats you like a kid sister – me too, come to that – an’ he’d not want to see either of us get hurt.’

  Ellie still looked doubtful. ‘You’re right about Connor, but even if Aidan is all he appears to be I don’t know whether he feels the same about me. As you say, we’ve both grown up a lot, and things will’ve changed for him too.’

  ‘The best thing you could do is meet up with him. That way you can see for yourself whether he still feels the same way about you. It’s not easy over the telephone or by letter – which is why I wanted to tell you about Archie and me face to face – so how about givin’ him a call and arranging to get together?’

  Ellie nodded. ‘All right, I will. But not whilst you’re in town.’

  Arla raised her brow. ‘Why not? Don’t you think your bezzie’ll want to know all the gossip hot off the press?’ She glanced at her wristwatch. ‘D’you know the number of his NAAFI?’

  ‘Yes, but surely you don’t mean I should ring him now? I don’t know what to say. I need more time …’

  Arla shook her head chidingly. ‘You’ve wasted too much time as it is. Strike while the iron’s hot, that’s what I always say. Come with me, my girl. You’ve a phone call to make.’

  ‘Ellie! What a nice surprise!’

  Ellie gulped, her mouth drying up. She stared appealing at Arla, who mouthed, ‘How are you?’

  ‘How are you?’ Ellie said, twisting the cable to the receiver around her fingers.

  ‘I’m grand. You know I’ve got my wings, don’t you? I’m sure I must’ve mentioned it.’

  Ellie smiled. ‘Just a thousand times. You’re still enjoying it, then?’

  He chuckled down the receiver. ‘I love it here in Waddington, and having Connor as my tail-end Charlie is the icing on the cake.’ There was an audible pause. ‘But why are you ringing? There’s nothing wrong, is there?’

  The two girls were squashed into the small kiosk and Ellie was holding the phone between them so that they could both hear Aidan’s end of the conversation. Again, she looked appealingly at Arla, who mouthed, ‘No. When can we meet?’

  Ellie nodded. ‘No, I just wondered if there was any chance of meeting up. We did say we’d try …’<
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  ‘I can do better than try, chuck. Me and Connor’ll be coming to RAF Speke sometime in the not too distant future, so we’ll definitely be able to see you then.’

  Ellie’s smile split her face in two. ‘That’s wonderful. Make sure you let me know when, won’t you? At least that way I can try to get some leave, or arrange to be around, or …’

  He chuckled again. ‘Of course I’ll let you know. Couldn’t come all the way back there and not see my favourite girl, could I?’

  ‘Ow!’ Grinning, Arla had nudged her in the ribs.

  ‘What was that?’

  Stifling her giggles, Ellie pushed her friend out of the kiosk. ‘Nothing, just hit my elbow on the door. I’ve got to go, Aidan. Give my love to your parents.’

  Outside the kiosk Arla was jiggling excitedly. ‘See? That wasn’t so hard, was it? I bet you’re glad I came home now, aren’t you?’

  Ellie linked her arm through Arla’s. ‘I was glad you came back before, although I must admit I am pleased you made me ring him. I don’t think I’d have done it otherwise.’

  ‘You must let me know what happens when he comes to Speke. You never know, this time next year you could be gettin’ married, you in your uniform an’ him in his. I bet you’ll make a great-lookin’ pair.’

  Ellie pictured herself outside the pigsties, dressed in dungarees and wellies, with a small bouquet of lavender in her hands. Next to her stood Aidan in his tatty overalls, his unruly hair blowing across his eyes whilst the vicar read their vows. She giggled.

  Gwen waved to Arla, who trotted towards her, holding her cap firmly to her head as a gust of wind tried to remove it.

  ‘Come to say goodbye?’

  Arla nodded. ‘Where’s Ellie? Only I’ve gorra get a wriggle on. I’m runnin’ late after sayin’ ta-ra to me mam. I thought she were never goin’ to let me go!’

  ‘My aunt was the same last time I went for a visit. She wanted to load me up with bara brith, scones an’ Spam sarnies. I didn’t want to seem ungrateful but it’s not easy carryin’ lots of squashy food in a kitbag on a crowded train, but when I mentioned it she just said it all goes down the same way so what does it matter.’ She wrinkled her nose. ‘Spam and bara brith do not taste good when smudged together.’ She pointed towards the officers’ mess. ‘There she is! She’s lookin’ for Bagheera. She let him out this mornin’ after we’d had brekker, an’ we’ve not seen him since.’

  Arla grimaced. ‘Oh, heck, he’s still quite small so he could’ve hidden in any number of places. How long has she been looking?’

  ‘Since ten minutes after she let him out.’ Gwen sighed. ‘She should’ve done it when he were a bit younger: he wouldn’t have felt so brave then, and wouldn’t have ventured off so easily. Someone told her to put butter on his paws; said it’d make him come back home.’ She glanced at her wristwatch. ‘He’s been gone for two hours, so I think we can safely say the butter theory is a lot of old hogwash.’

  Arla looked back towards the guard’s gate. ‘I haven’t got long before my taxi comes to take me to the station. I must say, I’ve really enjoyed spending the week with you and Ellie.’

  Gwen smiled. ‘Thanks, cariad. It’s been grand meetin’ you too. Ellie suggested we might visit you in Lincoln when we get a bit of leave. You don’t mind if I tag along too, do you?’

  ‘Not at all. The more the merrier, an’ you’ll be able to meet Archie.’ A thought occurred to her. ‘Speakin’ of boyfriends, would you mind keepin’ an eye on Ellie and that Aidan if they meet up? Only I don’t want to see her gettin’ hurt, and whilst he sounds ideal …’ She frowned. ‘I dunno, I s’pose I’m just worried he might be too good to be true, and my experience of men with rank is that they tend to think themselves above the rest of us. He may have been shy and reserved on the farm but being a pilot in the RAF will’ve brought him out of his shell for sure.’ She glanced towards the barracks that Gwen shared with Evie. ‘Women are ten a penny when it comes to pilots, so he’ll have had more than his fair share of bottle-blonde floozies flingin’ themselves at him, if you know what I mean.’

  Gwen nodded. ‘Don’t you worry about Ellie. I’ll make sure he doesn’t get a chance to treat her badly. I don’t know her as well as you do, of course, but she has told me some stuff about her life before the war, and I gather it was far from plain sailing, especially when it came to men.’

  ‘She’s been through the mill all right. When I learned I was going to Cornwall when she went to Weybourne I must admit I was concerned for her.’ Arla patted Gwen’s arm in a friendly fashion. ‘Now I know she has a pal like you to watch out for her I’ll rest a lot easier.’

  The girls were interrupted by a yelp of outrage from somewhere near the officers’ mess. ‘Bagheera!’ cried Gwen and Arla simultaneously. Trotting in that direction, they found Ellie on her haunches, carefully unhooking Bagheera from around an officer’s thigh.

  ‘I’m so, so sorry,’ Ellie babbled as the officer, his face a mask of pain, glared down at her. ‘I’m afraid you probably scared him more when you shouted; he must have thought you were angry at him. He’s not used to people shouting.’

  ‘What the bloody hell was he doing underneath the damned building in the first place … Argghh!’

  ‘Try not to shout. He just sinks his claws in tighter if he feels threatened,’ Ellie said, the sweat beginning to form on her brow as she started again to unhook Bagheera from the man’s uniform trousers.

  The officer, who had opened his mouth to protest, appeared to change his mind. He took a few deep breaths before asking in as cool and calm a manner as possible, ‘Threatened? How in God’s name is he the one who’s feeling threatened when he’s been clawing his way towards my … my …’ his mouth tightened, ‘the top of my leg!’

  Ellie looked up pleadingly. ‘I’m sure if you relaxed a little …’ She jerked her head in Arla and Gwen’s direction. ‘Thank God you’re here. Give us a hand, will you? Arla, you grab his back legs and lift them upwards – slowly – and Gwen, could you put your finger in the corner of his mouth?’ Fortunately, before either girl could come within reach, for reasons known only to himself Bagheera released his grip on the officer.

  Rubbing his leg, the officer glared at Bagheera. ‘By rights I could have that thing shot, only I understand he’s been good for Corporal Caldecott, got her smiling again.’ His glare softened. ‘I suggest you give him some sort of training. Next time he might not be so lucky.’

  ‘Thank you, and I’m ever so sorry. I promise I’ll keep him under better control. I’m going to put him back in the hut right this minute so he can’t come to any more harm,’ Ellie told him.

  The officer’s eyebrows shot toward his hairline. ‘I wouldn’t worry about him coming to any harm. If anything someone should warn the dogs that there’s a lion on the loose.’

  Cuddling Bagheera close to her chest, she turned to Arla and Gwen. ‘Thanks for coming to my rescue. Let’s get him back before he gets up to more mischief.’ She started off towards the barracks, then stopped abruptly. ‘Gosh, I’ve just realised: today’s the day you’re heading back to Lincoln. How long have you got before you leave?’

  Arla looked at her wristwatch and grimaced. ‘About ten minutes. It would’ve been longer but you know what me mam’s like when it comes to goodbyes.’

  Ellie giggled. ‘You need a good half-hour and plenty of room for all the extra goodies.’

  Arla stroked the top of Bagheera’s head. ‘How come you let him out? I thought you were waitin till I’d gone back to Lincoln before you let the little feller stretch his legs for the first time?’

  Ellie looked round guiltily. ‘He peed in Evie’s shoe … again.’

  Arla emitted a shriek of laughter, then clapped a hand to her mouth. ‘Sorry … was she awfully angry?’

  Gwen coughed on a giggle. ‘She would be if she knew, but luckily I caught the little blighter before he’d finished so the damage wasn’t too bad. I jammed a load of toilet paper in there to soak it up then ru
bbed in some of Ellie’s Lily of the Valley talcum powder.’ She smiled. ‘It smelled quite nice, actually.’

  Arla giggled. ‘You do know that if she ever finds out, all hell’s goin’ to break loose?’

  ‘Well, she won’t, will she? After all, if she were ever going to notice it would’ve been this morning, and he won’t do it again, because I’m going to make sure he starts going out every day.’ Ellie glanced at the ablutions block. ‘Although it might be a good idea to see if we can block up some of the holes under the buildings. That way he won’t be able to ambush anyone.’

  Reaching the gate, Ellie handed Bagheera over to Gwen before embracing Arla. ‘I’m going to miss you so much! I promise to come and visit as soon as I get some leave, and I’ll let you know what happens with Aidan, of course. Oh, I wish you weren’t going!’

  ‘It’s been good coming back. I was a bit worried that being in the city after the blitz might dampen my spirits, but after seein’ you two, and me mam an’ dad, well, it’s made me feel more positive about the whole thing. If we can survive that, we can survive anything, am I right? Besides, I didn’t want me an’ Archie to get married an’—’

  ‘Hold on! What do you mean, get married?’ said Ellie, her eyes rounding.

  ‘Don’t worry, we’ve not planned owt, and in fact he’s not even asked me yet—’

  ‘But you’ve thought about it?’

  Arla laughed. ‘Doesn’t every girl? When they meet the right one?’

  Ellie took Bagheera back from Gwen and smoothed down the fur on top of his head. ‘So you think he’s the one, then?’

  Arla shook her head. ‘I don’t think he’s the one, I know he is. I’ve loved being home, really I have, but I’ve been missing Archie like you wouldn’t believe.’ A smile formed on her lips. ‘You’d think I’d be glad to get away from him for a bit, but it’s quite the opposite. I wish he could’ve come home with me.’

  A car pulled up behind them and sounded its horn. Turning, Arla waved at the driver. ‘It’s my taxi come to take me to the station.’ Placing her kitbag on the ground, she embraced Ellie and Gwen. ‘Gosh, I’m goin’ to miss you two! You come over and see me as soon as you can, promise?’