Complicated Love_A Black Light Novel

by Livia Grant

  “You need to handle whatever drama you guys have going on with your little girlfriend. I need Jaxson back here immediately. We have more candidates for club manager still waiting to meet him.”

  “First, Emma is more than a drama or just our girlfriend. She is our family. And no, I’m not going to leave Chase to deal with this on his own. Reschedule the interviews for tomorrow. Stay there until the construction crew is ready to leave and then lock things up. There should be one security guy who stays behind on duty.”

  “Jaxson, we have tight…”

  “Stop. I know the timelines. This is my decision, not yours. You work for me. Follow orders.” He was about to hang up but added, “Oh, and get me a new iPhone. I’ll get it in the morning. And alert everyone at the house that if Emma shows up, keep her there and call Chase’s phone immediately. You got it?”

  “I don’t like…”

  “Yes or no?” He didn’t fucking have time to be nice. Or patient. He needed compliance.

  “Yes, sir.” Lola’s response was total sass, but he ended the call. He’d deal with her later.

  He was reaching to hand Chase his phone back when he heard it — the quiet click of the front door. From the relieved excitement on his lover’s face, Chase had heard it too. The men turned together and rushed towards the front foyer.

  Jaxson had known he was upset, but it wasn’t until he rounded the corner and caught his first glimpse of Emma standing just inside the door that he realized just how shaken he was by the day’s events.

  It was so much more than Emma’s short disappearance that had him reeling. It was her blatant disobedience. Her keeping secrets. His guilt. It all crushed him until he stood frozen in the entryway, watching as Chase rushed to their love and scooped her into a bear hug so tight Emma squeaked.

  Fucking tears pricked his eyes, but he willed them away. He had to be the strong one, although his heart ached with a physical pang as he watched Chase’s joy. But when Emma’s gaze met his over Chase’s shoulder, the pang in his chest exploded.

  She looked so lost, it slew him. His feet moved on autopilot, desperate to touch her. Emma was normally the center in the trio’s sandwich hugs, but Jaxson hugged Chase from behind, his left hand wrapping around Emma’s waist, and the other into her hair, finally linking the threesome together where they belonged. He crashed his lips to hers with an animalistic possession. It was his childish attempt to reassert his dominance, trying valiantly to chase away the feeling that he was losing control.

  Only the wetness of Emma’s tears pulled him out of the punishing kiss. He felt like an asshole when she had to gasp for air as he released her mouth.

  Still, they clung to each other, no one saying a word for a long minute. It was Miguel’s voice that broke the silence.

  “I’ll head out, now.”

  Jaxson finally released his lovers, stepping away to call out to Miguel who was opening the front door behind Emma. “Hold up, Martinez.”

  The stocky man turned to look back as Jaxson approached, his hand held out.

  “Thanks, man. I don’t often turn control over.” He paused before adding, “I’m glad you were here today. You’re exactly the kind of man of action we’re looking for.”

  He smiled a crooked smile. “No problem. You do know Mr. Cartwright already hired me, right?”

  Jaxson glanced back at Chase who had the decency to shrug his shoulders. “He’s the guy for the job. And we needed his help.”

  “Agreed.” He wasn’t upset Chase had made the right call. Still, something nagged at him as he turned back to his new head of security. “Leave your info with Lola. Pick your team, but I have final approval on all staffing decisions. We’ll work out the rest of the details tomorrow.”

  “Yes, sir, Mr. Davidson.” The handsome Hispanic man smiled.

  “It’s Jaxson.”

  Just before Miguel turned to leave, he nodded towards Emma and Chase. “Glad we located Miss Fischer.”

  Jaxson nodded, closing the front door after their newest employee left and locking it. His hand gripped the doorknob as he took several calming breaths before turning back around. For the first time in years, he felt unsure of himself… as if he were barely holding himself together, like a steady wind would make him crumble. He leaned forward, resting his forehead against the cool wood of the front door as his mind raced to make sense of the afternoon’s events, letting the relief Emma was safe calm him.

  Emma’s quiet “I’m sorry” was ridiculously inadequate for the hell she’d put the men through. As mad as he was at himself for letting things get so out of control, at that moment, all he could think about was her role in the day’s shitshow.

  Jaxson spun around so fast Emma flinched, burying her face against Chase’s shoulder.

  “You need to cool down,” Chase cautioned, hugging their girl protectively.

  “Whose side are you on? Ten minutes ago you were just as frantic as I was!”

  “Since when do we take sides?” Chase snapped.

  Fuck. He was right.

  Jaxson ran his hand through his hair nervously. “That’s not what I meant and you know it.”

  “The only thing I know is she’s shaking like a leaf. We need to go in, sit down, and talk.” Chase hugged Emma harder, speaking softly against her ear. “We were just worried, baby. Let’s go snuggle and you can tell us what’s going on.”

  When Emma didn’t start moving towards the living room, Chase bent down and scooped her into his arms. Jaxson watched as Emma wrapped her arms around his neck, burying her face against Chase’s shoulder intimately, clearly feeling safe with the switch of their trio.

  Watching his lovers comfort each other, for the first time in their almost three-year relationship a hint of jealousy threatened to poison Jaxson’s already precarious thoughts. He pushed it down, knowing intellectually it was ridiculous, but recognizing it as just another sign of how out of whack things had gotten in their complicated relationship.

  Still, as he followed behind them irrational anger bubbled through his veins, infecting him as surely as a virus. Months of crushing stress mingled with the day’s events resulting in an almost out-of-body crescendo of emotion he had no idea how to contain — let alone shut down. A quiet voice in his head begged him to storm out and not come back until he was back in control, but the louder fury won the day.

  “As much fun as it is to watch you two snuggling, we have a few more important things we need to be doing right now.”

  Neither Chase nor Emma answered him. Both staring at him with a healthy dose of fear in their eyes, making him feel like a line had been magically drawn between them. Him on one side, them — together — on the other.

  He fucking hated it.

  Fine. He was the Dom. It was his job to be the bad guy when the occasion called for it. “Emma, come here.”

  Her teary eyes widened. She glanced at Chase, deferring to him for advice. He hesitated, but finally nodded. “Go ahead, baby,” he whispered as he helped her to her feet.

  Emma approached him slowly, stopping just out of his reach. She was taking shallow breaths, unable to look at her Dom.

  “Eyes,” he ordered. It was an order he’d given her hundreds of times before in the throes of passion or in a D/s scene, yet today it felt different. It was different. Their unshakeable bond had a crack in it, and by God, he was going to figure out why and glue it back together. “Were my instructions earlier today unclear when I asked you to stay at Khloe and Ryder’s until we picked you up?”

  “No, Sir,” she whispered, looking away nervously before remembering he’d ordered eyes and snapping back to his gaze.

  “Why did you leave then?”

  She opened and closed her mouth several times, but no words came out.

  “Emma, I’m waiting for your answer.”

  “I… don’t… know.”

  “Fine. Let’s try an easier question. Where have you been all afternoon?”

  She hesitated, but eventually answered. “I
went to the beach. I wanted to be near the water.” Finally, a truthful answer from her.

  “And the private beach at Khloe’s wasn’t good enough?”

  “I… needed to…” She paused so long he didn’t think she’d finish her sentence. Finally she added a soft, “think.”

  “Think about what?”

  Silence.

  “Why did you turn off your phone?”

  “I didn’t. It died. That’s why I took a cab instead of an Uber. I couldn’t use my app to call a car when I wanted to come home. I had to flag a taxi.”

  “Christ, do you know how many terrible things could have happened to you out there? With no phone? We’ve been fucking frantic.”

  “I didn’t mean to worry you. How did you…” she stopped mid-sentence, silenced by his scowl.

  “How did we know you’d left? Oh, that was one of the highlights of my day. I loved getting a call from Helms telling me to get my head out of my ass. Talking about needing to get some fucking secret out of you. I wanted to argue with him that we don’t keep secrets from each other, but it was a little hard to make the case for that when I had no fucking clue where you were when he called!”

  “Ryder called?” she squeaked.

  Why was she suddenly even more afraid than she had been seconds before?

  His instincts demanded the next question. “What are you keeping from us, Emma?”

  Her eyes widened, but she stood silently.

  “What’s wrong?” Jaxson pressed again.

  “Nothing,” she finally answered, this time a bit stronger.

  Chase stood, approaching as he tried to reason with her. “Talk to us, baby. It’s clear you’re holding something in. We can’t fix it if we don’t know what it is.”

  “This isn’t something you can fix.”

  “So, there is something wrong,” Jaxson reasoned, his anger growing again. “You just lied to my face on top of everything else.” Patience wasn’t something he had a lot of even on a good day, and today was definitely not a good day. “Maybe you won’t tell us what’s bothering you, but I sure as hell can tell you what’s bothering me.” He stopped long enough to widen his stance, crossing his arms over his chest aggressively before continuing. “I have a submissive who is refusing to trust her Dom with a secret she apparently had no problems sharing with Khloe and Ryder. That same submissive expressly ignored my instructions, putting herself in danger in the process, and scaring Chase and me half to death. Particularly when we couldn’t reach said sub on the phone she is never to leave home without. We had to cancel the rest of the interviews! People who had taken time out of their day to meet with us for a job were sent away, and we lost a valuable afternoon when you know damn well time is short.”

  “Oh, believe me, I can’t forget how valuable your time is. Lola reminds me of it every five minutes.”

  Jax wasn’t sure who was more surprised by Emma’s sassy outburst — him or her. She never spoke to him with that tone of voice. Ever.

  She had his attention.

  “Is that what this is about? Lola?” When she didn’t answer, he tacked on. “For crying out loud. You can’t possibly be jealous of Lola!”

  “I’m not jealous.” He almost called her a liar, until she added, “I’m angry.”

  “Angry? Why the hell would you be angry I hired someone to help us?”

  “Because you let her treat Chase and me like shit. You’ve never let anyone else do that. I’ve heard you put so many people, including Spencer, in their place if they try to do that. Why not Lola?”

  Jaxson had to push down his natural inclination to demand she use a respectful tone of voice with him as her Dom. He didn’t want to do anything to stop her from talking now that she’d finally started to share, even if he hated what she was saying. “Lola is good at what she does.”

  “Bullshit. She’s a bitch.” Emma crossed her arms across her own chest, mimicking his defensive stance.

  As much as he hated her insubordination, he’d take the spark of anger in her eyes over the fear he’d detected minutes before any day.

  Chase, the peacekeeper of their family jumped off the couch, placing himself between the two of them as if he might need to referee. “Everyone stay calm.” He turned towards Jaxson to add, “But Emma is right. Lola is a bitch and she needs to go.”

  “Oh, for crying out loud. Are you two so insecure that you can’t deal with her for just a few more weeks until we get the clubs open?”

  Emma harrumphed. “Are you so blind you can’t see what she’s doing? Between her and the damn designer always hitting on Chase and, hell, even the news anchor chick this morning pawing him on live television. Forgive me if I’m a little tired of feeling like a spectator in your lives.” She’d rounded on Chase halfway through her rant.

  “I handled Brandi,” he defended.

  “Oh really. If the situation had been reversed, the guy who did that shit to me would be in the hospital right now.”

  Jaxson growled, “Damn straight. So this is the big secret? You’re jealous?”

  A strange cocktail of emotions flitted across Emma’s gorgeous violet eyes.

  “Yep,” was her snappy reply.

  He knew in his gut they were barely scratching the surface of what was bothering her, so her quick lie as she looked into his face was the final straw.

  “So, if I fire Lola tomorrow, everything will go back to normal around here?”

  He saw her breath hitch. She swallowed hard. Her tears were back, and still she lied again. “Yep.”

  “Enough! Don’t insult me. I know damn well you’re hiding something. Tell us. Now.” He felt like an asshole, but his patience was gone.

  He noticed her head shake ever so slightly. She had dug in. Well, he could dig in too.

  “Fine. You won’t talk, then we’ll move into action instead. Strip. Lay over the back of the loveseat with your ass in the air. You’ll take your punishment now for disobeying and putting yourself in danger. Maybe you’ll want to talk after I light your ass on fire.”

  Chase turned towards him. “I thought we agreed, you can’t spank her into happiness.”

  “That’s not my intent. I’m going to punish her into compliance. We have rules. She agreed to the rules and she broke them. Period.”

  “Jaxson…” His name was a plea from Chase.

  “Am I still the Dom of this family?” he shouted, angry his decision was being challenged yet again.

  “Of course, but…”

  “Help her get into position. Then kneel on the couch facing her and hold her hands tight. She’s going to want to reach back before I’m done,” he warned.

  Emma hadn’t moved. She stood frozen, looking between the two men as they uncharacteristically disagreed with each other. Only when Chase turned and walked slowly towards her did Emma’s tears spill over.

  An eerie silence filled the room broken only by tiny sniffles from Emma as her nose ran and the rustle of her sundress and bathing suit being discarded to the floor.

  As always, the sight of her curvy body he loved so damn much sparked the start of an erection. He willed it away. Despite the fact they hadn’t made love for several days due to sheer exhaustion at the end of each day, now was not the time for sex. Maybe after he’d disciplined her, then he could rectify their dry spell by fucking her hard from behind. He’d order Chase to fill her mouth with that thick shaft of his. Maybe then, everything could get back to normal.

  He was a prick for feeling excited seeing her laid out before him. Her pink pussy peeking out from between her legs. He needed more. “Legs wider. Let me see all of you.”

  The loveseat back was low enough that with her legs wide, she was at the perfect height to raise her rounded ass high in the air.

  “Please, Jax. Don’t do this.” This time it was Emma asking him to stop. “This isn’t going to help.”

  “Maybe it won’t help you, but it sure as hell will help me.” He reached to unbuckle his belt, pulling the two-inch thick leather
free so fast the end snapped in the air with a crack. Emma flinched.

  He moved into position and before he could second-guess his decision, pulled his arm back and delivered a full-power strike across Emma’s ass. Her gurgled cry told him he was getting his point across. Before his eyes, white skin turned to pink and finally red across the swath of punished skin.

  The second lash was a bit lower, overlapping with the first enough to make her want to stand had Chase not been holding her hands. He was used to tears during a punishment scene, but her choked sob tore at his heart. But he pushed through his reticence, desperate to regain control.

  The third strapping brought a howl of pain like he’d never heard from Emma before. She was his experienced submissive. She’d been on the receiving end of harsher discipline sessions than the current one so her reaction was alarming. Chase felt it too because he looked up, tears streaming down his face as he silently begged Jaxson to stop.

  All hell broke loose when the fourth strike connected with Emma’s ass. It was as if it finally broke the dam Emma had constructed between them.

  “Puppies!” she shouted.

  Christ. In almost three years, she’d never once used her safeword. He froze, unsure how to proceed. He stood stock-still, watching as things moved in slow motion around him. Chase moved around the couch to help her stand, yet she collapsed into his arms like a wet noodle. He saw his lovers’ mouths moving, but the ringing in his ears was so loud he couldn’t hear what was said.

  Chase shouting got his attention. “Get a bottle of water from the fridge.” Chase was the one giving the orders, now.

  Jaxson moved to do as he was told, listening to Chase trying to comfort Emma as she hiccupped.

  She’d safeworded. It was a blow to his ego. He had never felt so distanced from his lovers. He had always prided himself on being the kind of Dom that was in tune with his submissives. That he had no clue why she’d stopped him drove home just how much trouble their family was in. For the first time, he contemplated the possibility Chase was right. Maybe Emma was so unhappy she was planning on leaving them.