Rae of Hope

by W.J. May

  They drove back to Guilder, Andy talking most of the way.

  “All rightie, you get going.” Andy parked in the school parking lot and unclipped his belt. “I’ve two younger sisters. I know how it goes.”

  He leaned toward her, and Rae wedged herself against the door, terrified he might try to kiss her. She reached for the door handle, about ready to make her escape. Andy’s eyes traveled down her arm. In one motion, he was out of the car and racing to the passenger side. He opened her door and helped her out. As he led her to Aumbry House, he said, “Remember to save me a dance, princess. You promised.”

  Rae watched him saunter over to Joist House, whistling as he walked. He turned and yelled, “Now you’ve had lunch with a werewolf at the American Cheeseburger in London! Not a lot of people can say that.”

  Rae grinned, despite herself. She could still hear his laughter as she dashed up the stairs. Grabbing her toiletries, she rushed to the showers, avoiding telling Molly about her lunch date. Crap, that’s what it was. A date. She had only meant to go as friends, but obviously Andy’s intentions were completely different. He seemed like the brother she had always wanted. Obviously he considered her…ew! I can’t even finish the thought! It can’t possibly be a worse mess. Then the dean had to be there. With her luck, he’d probably taken notes and planned on sending a letter to Andy’s parents and mentioning the entire thing at the Alumni Dinner at Christmas. She scrubbed her scalp harder, trying to clear her thoughts. She wanted to have fun tonight and, no matter what, she was determined to do so.

  While putting the butterfly clips in Rae’s hair, Molly grilled her on lunch. Not getting any answers, Molly finally fell silent and focused on Rae’s hair. Rae felt a twinge of discomfort not talking to her roomy, but the whole thing had been uncomfortable for her and she really didn’t want Molly to go blabbing to everyone about it, possibly hurting Andy’s feelings. The one thing Rae was absolutely certain of when it came to her roommate was that she couldn’t keep a secret if her life depended on it. Better not even ask her to try. I’m already a freak. I don’t want to be the freak who broke Andy’s heart. What would Devon think then? That brought Rae out of her thoughts with a start. She mentally lectured herself not to think about Devon since he had a girlfriend, whom he’d be dancing with tonight. And I’m going to have fun, too.

  The tray of clips empty, Molly offered to put on Rae’s makeup. Thirty minutes later, she rolled Rae’s chair in front of the mirror. Rae suddenly felt nervous and stared down at her hands.

  “Quit avoiding. Your hair’s fantastic. And the makeup isn’t over done, I promise. You’re really going to turn some heads! Who knew?”

  Fluttering in her stomach, Rae peeked. Her eyes widened in surprise. Molly had put clips around each tendril of curl. Every direction Rae turned, sparkles glittered through her curls and bounced off the blond and dark parts. It looked like movie-star hair. She swore she could hear the other girls down the hall laughing. She glanced at Molly and grinned sheepishly.

  “Don’t be so shocked. It’s about time we got to see what you really look like. You’ve been so busy trying to keep up with classes and learning about tatùs, you never bother to put any effort into your physical appearance. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you put more than mascara lip gloss on, or had your hair out of a bun or ponytail.”

  Rae could only smile.

  “We’ll show the boys of Guilder there are girls here worth a second glance!” Molly put her hands on her hips. “And we’ll let everyone here know you’re not just a stupid name.”

  Rae wanted to hug Molly. That was the nicest thing anyone had ever said to her. I have the best roomie in the world.

  Chapter 12

  The Dance

  Heading off to the dance half an hour late, Rae noticed the empty Roe Hampton bus in the parking lot. Rae, Molly, Haley, Maria and the twins all headed up the path to the Oratory. They all jumped simultaneously when a deep voice spoke front a bench in the shadows.

  “Good evening, ladies. You’re all splendidly charming.” Dean Carter stepped from the shadows. “Might I have a quick word with Ms. Kerrigan?”

  Pounding echoed in Rae’s ears. She reminded herself that she planned to have fun tonight, no matter what. Creepy old goat. “Go on in. I’ll meet you inside.” Rae turned her attention to the dean, abruptly feeling less confident than her voice had sounded. She tried to ignore Haley’s snicker.

  The dean waited until the others went in. “I wanted to take a moment to ask how things are going.” He didn’t wait for Rae’s reply. “I also wanted to mention you’ll be sleeping in the Infirmary on the fourteenth of November.” He frowned. “So we ca--may see you on the morning of the fifteenth. This is one of the conditions we set with your uncle on your being allowed into our school. That’s all. Have a pleasant evening.” He stood and walked away, leaving Rae frozen in her spot.

  What? That had been totally abrupt. Why’d he have to tell her right now? The guy was off his rocker. She slowly made her way inside, shaking her head, thankful again no one knew her birthday was actually the thirteenth. It would give her a couple of days to prepare for the English Inquisition she’d have on the fifteenth.

  The party seemed to have already started as Rae entered through the double doors. She felt like she’d stepped back in time. The Oratory had been transformed into a ballroom during King Henry’s time. The stage on the far side resembled a castle. There were long tables with flowing linen cloth covering them and old wooden benches where students sat talking and eating grapes and other fruits. Fire-lit torches lined the walls, casting wonderful dancing shadows over the wood carvings. Between the feeling the Oratory emitted and the decorations, Rae couldn’t tell if it was the fifteen hundreds or the twenty-first century.

  She spotted Molly with the girls on the other side of the hall. She sensed everyone’s eyes catch and stare as she walked across the marble floor.

  What’s wrong? Crap, did my hair mess up when we walked from the dormitory? Is my dress split? She glanced down at her shoes, gave her dress a tug, and then gently patted her hair. Nothing has fallen out of place, and I don’t see any obvious problems. Did Dean Carter do some voodoo thing to me?

  She’d become accustomed to the stares, but this gawking felt ten times worse – like she’d turned into some exotic fish inside a tank instead of just the freak with a bad family history. Suddenly walking became her single focus; too afraid she’d trip in her heels and end up on her face in front of everyone.

  Andy stepped in her path and came to her rescue. “Stunning.” He let out a low whistle.

  Nicholas came up behind him, smiling excitedly. “Rae! My lab partner, how are you this evening?” He let out a whoah-hoah.

  Rae stood rooted. Thankful for the low lights, she was glad no one could see her face. “I’m good. Thanks.” Glancing behind the boys, she pretended to see Molly waving at her. “Oh, Molls needs me.” It was tempting to break into a run, but still terrified she’d trip in her heels, she forced herself to walk. Simply focusing on breathing in and out seemed about all she could handle at the moment. This attention felt so foreign.

  “Everyone’s staring at you.” She could hear Maria’s soft voice inside her head. She sounded sweet and sincere. “It’s totally different than when you first arrived. It’s like they’re seeing you for the first time. You know, not the name Kerrigan, but the girl, Rae.” Maria giggled. “You should see the faces of the girls from Roe Hampton. Totally jealous! Molly’s mission is accomplished – you know she’ll never shut up about it now!”

  Rae glanced up toward Maria and started laughing. Maria’s last sentence was totally true and exactly what she needed to hear to drum her out of her nerves.

  “Rae,” whispered Molly when she reached them. “If you could feel the electricity in the air like I can, man-oh-man. It’s priceless. All that time I spent on your hair…totally worth it.”

  “I think I’d feel like a princess tonight, if I wasn’t so nervous. These heels you ma
de me wear are killer high.” Rae giggled. The heels were only about an inch, but having never worn anything but sandals or tennis shoes her whole life, she was not good at teetering on heels of any height. “I have a feeling the Roe Hampton girls aren’t too happy with the fact they have to share the boys now. Come on, let’s go get some punch.”

  A live band began setting up on the makeshift stage. Rae felt a flutter of excitement when she noticed Devon. He stood on stage chatting with some of the band members.

  A pretty, blonde-haired, girl walked up on stage and put her hand in Devon’s. Rae tried to squelch the jealousy that rose in her chest. She squinted to get a better look at the girl she assumed was Beth. She had gorgeous, naturally blonde hair, with those natural highlights that made it look like it almost sparkled in the lights, and it sat poker straight across her shoulders. The kind of hair celebrities had in magazines that you never believed actually existed. Could hair really by that shiny?

  Her eyes traveled down Beth’s body. She had olive-colored skin that probably stayed tanned all winter long. Miss Perfect Body wore a strapless, designer dress. If Rae ever tried to wear something similar, it would fall down as she had nothing on top to hold it up. Beth, on the other hand, had plenty to keep the dress, and seemingly Devon, in place.

  Rae sighed in defeat. She couldn’t compete with someone like that. How could she?

  Andy appeared at her side, offering a glass of punch. “I have to tell you again how great you look. It’s, uh…you’re pretty hot.” He nodded toward her dress.

  “Molly picked it out.” She purposely turned her back on the stage and Devon. She reminded herself that he wasn’t the only guy in the room and even though Andy was more big brother than big romance to her, it felt nice to be noticed.

  “There’s a new James Bond movie coming out next week. D’you want to go see it?”

  “That’d be fun. We could see if Molly and Nicholas want to come with us as well.” She pointed to the punch table. “They seem to be having a laugh at the moment.”

  A look of frustration crossed Andy’s face. Then he smiled, like he’d just thought of something. “Except, I’m the only one of us who has a car and it’s pretty tiny.”

  “Maybe we should ask Julian or Riley to come along then, too.”

  “Where we going?” Riley sauntered by. He stopped directly in front of Rae, blatantly checking her out. “Wow, Kerrigan, you clean up nice. I heard some of the Roe Hampton girls bitchin’ but didn’t realize they were referring to you. It seems like we might have a bit of a competition heatin’ up here.” He elbowed Andy. “If we’re really lucky, a good catfight!”

  “I’d prefer a mud fight,” Andy said. The two guys roared with laughter.

  Sooo funny. Rae rolled her eyes. “Andy wondered if you wanted to go to a movie this weekend. We need another car.”

  “Movie? As long as Andy’s not asking me out.” He smirked at the scowl on Andy’s face. “Then sure. I can drive as long as you promise to ride shotgun in my car.” Riley grabbed her hand and gave it a gently gentle squeeze but didn’t let it go. “Come on. Let’s get this party started.”

  Before she could reply, Riley pulled her to the dance floor and began twirling her around to an upbeat tune the band played. Others joined them on the floor as the music continued. Molly wiggled in beside her and wouldn’t let her leave.

  When a quiet song finally slowed things down, Rae expertly dodged the reaching hands of several boys and made her way toward the punch bowl. Pouring herself a glass, she stepped back toward the shadows near the wall. She planned on staying there until her breathing slowed. She leaned against the cool wood and looked around the dance floor. Devon and Beth moved in sync near the stage. Determined to make every effort to ignore them, she physically turned her attention to whoever had just come up beside her. It was Riley. Crud.

  “Are you going to hide here all night when the slow numbers come on? You do realize ninety percent of Guilder is planning on asking you to dance.”

  “I’m not hiding. I just needed a little breather.” Rae took another sip of her punch and realized she’d already finished her cup. She sneaked one more glance toward Devon and Beth.

  “It’s none of my business, but they seem very happy together.”

  “Pardon? Not really sure who you’re talking about.” Rae kept her eyes roaming around the dance floor, pretending to look through the crowd. Her heart seemed to have jumped into her throat. She tried to swallow it back down.

  “Devon and Beth. They belong together. Plus, they’ve been dating for, like, ever.” Riley pushed his sleeves up, his tatù reflecting from the glittery lights. “You know, of course, Devon’s father approves of Beth. She isn’t in our circle.” Riley took Rae’s hand and pulled her toward the dance floor again. His cheetah tatù seemed like it was moving from the swaying reflection of the torch flames. “Some people frown upon inked people being together. Heck, almost everyone at the school follows the unwritten rule. There are a few of us who disagree…Why shouldn’t inked people like us stick together and make stronger talents? How can that be wrong? Shoot, royalty does it all the time.”

  Rae stared at Riley in disbelief. She’d been thinking it in the back of her mind but wouldn’t admit it, even to herself. It had always felt wrong somehow. But now…What was so bad about being with someone you liked? If Devon was so determined to follow the rules and please everyone around him, then let him. Her parents had married, bore her and she felt completely fine. When she received her tatù, she’d show everyone how good and strong she could be. A new-found sense of confidence started to grow inside her.

  She tucked a hair behind her ear, enjoying the soft feel of hair curling against her skin. “You’ve got a good point. What harm would there be in going out with someone from Guilder? Dating doesn’t mean you’re getting married. Guilder’s thinking’s as old as their buildings sometimes.”

  “Exactly!” Riley spun her away and back to him, dipping her. “So, when’re you and I gonna go out?”

  Rae froze in his arms, relieved when he pulled her back up to a standing position. She hadn’t been expecting that. She figured Riley’d been talking about Devon’s lack of courage to go against the grain, not angling the conversation around to hooking up with her himself. She’d gotten the impression he didn’t really like her. Surprise, surprise. But she didn’t feel the same. I have to be careful how I handle this though. Going out for lunch would be less embarrassing than telling Riley the truth, and possibly better than turning him down. “M-Maybe next weekend or something.”

  “Perfect! Let’s plan on Saturday afternoon.”

  She blinked. “O-Okay.”

  When the song ended, Rae dashed off to grab another glass of punch, terrified Riley’d follow. She glanced back, relieved to see him dancing with a pretty blonde from Roe Hampton. She took a deep breath and considered the first part of the conversation she’d had with Riley. Rae suddenly realized that he had neatly backed her into a corner, leaving her no alternative but to say yes to his invitation. Sly move, Cheetah boy. She made a mental note to be better prepared the next time she talked to him.

  “Excuse me, do you mind?” A silky soft voice interrupted her thoughts.

  Realizing she still held the punch ladle, she turned to apologize. The act of contrition stuck in her throat. The airy voice that had asked her to move was none other than Beth’s. Devon’s Beth.

  “Sorry.” Rae handed her the ladle, almost dropping it before quickly moving to the other side of the punch bowl. “Beth, right?”

  “How do you know my name?” Beth’s eyes narrowed.

  “I, um…” Rae paused, her heart hammering. “I noticed you on stage with Devon and just assumed. Everyone knows he has a girlfriend at Roe Hampton.”

  “An’ who are you?” Beth didn’t seem as sweet as Devon had said. In fact her attitude screamed Queen Bee. Rae knew all about that type. They were always the ones who tried to make her life hell back home, if they didn’t ignore her. But
things were different now. She wasn’t invisible anymore and suddenly, that didn’t seem like such a bad thing.

  “I’m Rae, Rae Kerrigan.”

  “Ohhhh…” Beth smirked. “You’re the kid who needs tutoring. Devon told me about you. Don’t you think it’s strange you made it into a school like Guilder, and you need help with your classes? Your father must be loaded or have some excellent connections to get you in.” She crossed her arms. “Maybe your mom slept with the dean?”

  Rae blinked in surprise. Then Beth’s last comment about her mother sunk in. It made her livid. Wishing she had a tatù to shrink Beth into a bug she could squash with her shoe, she stiffened. “I got in on my own merit, thank you. My dad’s dead and my mother passed away as well. No loads of cash or connections. Guilder actually sought me out. I live in New York.”

  Beth had the decency to appear slightly embarrassed, but only for a moment. She glared at Rae before storming past her.

  “It was nice meeting you,” Rae said cheerfully, wiggling her fingers at Beth’s back. A small driftwood of guilt floated by. She’d been brought up better, but the satisfaction the look on Beth’s face had brought made it worth it.

  A warm breath against her neck sent shudders down her spine. She jumped.

  “Were you teasing Beth?” Devon whispered.

  “Crap! You scared me.” She slapped him lightly on the shoulder. “No sneaking up on people tonight. It’s against the rules.”

  “Rules? I didn’t know there were rules. Any more I should know about?” He laughed.

  Rae rolled her eyes at him. “For the record, I didn’t bug Beth. She asked me if my parents had money. I told her my parents had passed.” She shrugged. “I guess she felt embarrassed for mentioning it.”

  Devon’s dimple appeared. “After seeing you walk in tonight, I guess Beth’s got some issues with me tutoring you.” He grinned. After pausing a moment, he pointed to her head and quietly added, “I like it. It’s different than your usual ponytail.”