Crash

by Elana Johnson

  “Right here, Jules,” he said, helping her into the house. She leaned on him, because she needed to. She didn’t have to be strong all the time. Hadn’t she been the one to tell Lucas that everyone needed help sometimes?

  Well, she needed help right now.

  She collapsed onto a loveseat just inside the front door, a huge sigh leaking from her lips. “Okay.” She was surprised how quickly her breath came from just the short walk from the car to the couch, and she wondered how she was supposed to go back to work. Melinda had said she shouldn’t come back until she could walk easily, but honestly, Julie didn’t see that day coming at all.

  Her eyes drifted closed as her breathing evened out, and her mom said, “I’ll get you some pills.”

  “I don’t need pills, Mom,” she said. “They said not for another two hours.”

  “You’re in pain.”

  “I’m going to be okay. I just need a minute.” A lot more than a minute, but she was starting to feel calmer already. Yes, she had a sheen of sweat that had broken out on her forehead, and she felt a little clammy. More hot than cold, and then chilly. But she’d be okay, and she couldn’t take more pills now, or else she wouldn’t be able to take them later, when she’d really need them.

  “I’m making sandwiches,” Lawrence said. “Who wants one? Julie?”

  “Yes,” she said, almost wishing she had somewhere private to go. She wasn’t a baby. She took care of others for a living, and she wasn’t a good patient, that was for sure.

  Everyone went into the kitchen, leaving her to the living room. Her mind wandered, and of course, it went straight to Lucas. Their relationship had been brief by Julie’s standards, but he felt like the realest man she’d been out with in a long time. Maybe ever.

  “Grilled cheese,” Lawrence said, and Julie had once again lost track of time. Had she fallen asleep? The grogginess in the back of her mind said that she had. Her throat felt like she’d swallowed sand, and even as she accepted the plate with the golden, crispy grilled cheese sandwich on it, her stomach lurched.

  She couldn’t eat that, and in fact, she felt queasy and like she better get to the bathroom, quick.

  She swallowed against the nausea, as it was a side-effect of the medicine she was taking to make sure her road rash didn’t become infected. They’d basically treated her like a burn victim in the hospital, and her entire leg was wrapped in a clean, white wrap. The nurses changed it three times a day, and her dad had learned how so he could help her here at home.

  She startled when something cold touched her elbow, and she almost tossed her sandwich right off the plate. “Riley, get back,” Lawrence said, manhandling the dog as he moved her away from Julie. “She can’t help you right now.”

  Julie felt like she might not be able to help anyone again, and something inside her broke. She started crying, and Lawrence stared at her like she’d grown horns.

  “Julie,” he said.

  “I’m just…I’m fine.” She lifted the plate, and he took it from her. “I—can you help me down the hall? I just need to be alone.” She didn’t want to pretend anymore. She just wanted to sleep until she didn’t feel like crying.

  Lawrence steadied her with his strong hands, and he led her into her old bedroom. “I’m so sorry, Jules,” he whispered. “I thought I was doing the right thing.”

  “It’s not your fault.”

  “You wouldn’t have been there if not for me,” he said. “Whose fault is it?”

  Julie couldn’t answer, because she didn’t want to blame Lawrence. She couldn’t blame Lucas, as he had a loyalty to his club that she didn’t understand. They were family, and Julie could actually appreciate that.

  “No one’s,” she said. “It’s just a thing.” She lay down, relief spreading through her at the coolness of her bed.

  “I just…have you heard from Lucas?”

  “I don’t have a phone, Lawrence.” She looked at him, seeing some determination blooming to life on his face. “And I don’t need you to do anything about him. Now, will you bring me my sandwich and work on getting me a new phone?”

  He smiled at her, and it was a special brother-sister grin that said he understood exactly what she needed. Ooey gooey cheese and toasted bread, privacy, and a new phone waiting for her when she woke up from her very long nap.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  The scent of bacon and warm bread woke Lucas, and he groaned as he opened his eyes. The lights shone down from above—they never truly went out in the hospital. And today, the sun shone brightly through the windows on either side of his hospital bed too.

  “What time is it?” he asked, his throat so dry, his voice cracked.

  “Almost noon,” Jordan said. “I’m on my lunch break, and I brought you breakfast.”

  Lucas focused on his best friend, who put a smile on his face. Jordan looked quite different while wearing his slacks, white shirt, and tie—what he normally wore to work at the law office where he was an assistant to a paralegal.

  “Looks like your security team brought you some stuff,” Jordan said, moving over to the small counter. “You’ve got nacho cheese Doritos.” A bag rustled as Jordan picked it up. “A box of protein shakes. Seems like those two things go together.” He chuckled, picked something up, and turned toward him. “And a meatball sub sandwich.”

  “I want that,” Lucas said, suddenly ravenous. “And whatever you have in that bag.”

  “This is the triple bacon and egg sandwich from Moe’s.” Jordan put the brown bag and the meatball sub on Lucas’s tray and pushed it over to him. “How are you today?”

  “Everything hurts,” Lucas said, and that was the truth. He was glad he had someone in his life that he could be completely honest with. That had always been Jordan. He’d been there for Lucas in his teens, when staying home wasn’t an option. He’d stayed with Lucas in Forbidden Lake after his mother had moved. Jordan had always been right beside Lucas, and a wave of gratitude flowed over him.

  “I talked to the nurse, and she said you’ll probably go home tonight.” Jordan pulled up the plastic chair and sat down while Lucas reached for the paper bag with the fresh sandwich. “Mav said he’d come by this afternoon.”

  “Okay.”

  Lucas’s room had hardly been empty over the past four days. The only time everyone left was when the night nurses chased the bikers away. Even then, Maverick and Electron had snuck in every night after midnight. Sometimes Lucas was awake, and sometimes he wasn’t. But he knew when people had been there, because everyone was bringing him his favorite things. He had everything from snacks, to food, to drinks, to books and movies.

  To his knowledge, Julie had not come by. When he’d first woken up in the hospital, her name had been the first thing out of his mouth. Maverick had stepped over to him and said, “She’s fine, Lucas. She went home earlier today.”

  That was when he’d learned he’d been unconscious for almost twenty-four hours. He learned that Frogger, Fire, Mustang, and all of the Devil’s Breath members still in Williamsburg had been arrested. The hospital where he and Julie had stayed for one very long day had been cleansed. Emptied.

  “Daddy wasn’t there,” Maverick said. “I’ve heard on my underground that the Breathers split when Daddy joined them, and Frogger and Fire stayed, unwilling to give up their club. But they had to find a new clubhouse, and there were only a few of them left.”

  Lucas had nodded as much as he’d been able. When he was tired of the talking, he closed his eyes and feigned sleep. Of course, that always led to real sleep, as he’d suffered a concussion, had four broken ribs, and plenty of surface wounds from his skin being ground against the cement floor of the parking structure.

  Those would heal quickly, but Lucas had watched Jordan deal with broken ribs, and he knew he had several long months of pain and recovery ahead of him. He’d had a mild concussion once before, when his father had slammed his head into a wall during one of their arguments, but this one was much worse. Sometimes a stabbi
ng pain would arrive in his head, as if his own brain was attacking him. It came on suddenly, and Lucas couldn’t predict when. Light didn’t seem to matter, nor did sound or activity.

  Jordan stayed with him until Lucas felt like he couldn’t eat another bite. Then he gathered up all the trash and took it over to the can in the corner. “I’m going to get pizza tonight,” he said. “And I’ll wait to see what Mav says about when you’ll be discharged.”

  Lucas nodded, tired again already. “Okay.”

  “I got you a phone.” Jordan put the new device on the rolling tray that held Lucas’s water bottle. “I put in all your contacts.”

  “Thanks.” Lucas looked at Jordan, wishing he could articulate more of what he felt. But Jordan held his gaze, nodded, and turned toward the door. He understood. Lucas had been at his side after his accident too, and Lucas knew they’d always be there for one another.

  True, Jordan might have a separate part of his life now, with Felicia. But he was still Lucas’s blood brother, and he always would be.

  Jordan left, closing the door behind him, and Lucas’s thoughts migrated to Julie. He was a little surprised she hadn’t come to see him in the hospital. She’d had plenty of time, and she worked here.

  “She’s not at work,” he muttered to himself. At least he didn’t think she was well enough to work a stressful, on-her-feet-all-the-time shift on the third floor. He’d heard that Frogger had laid the bike down with Julie on it, and she hadn’t been wearing a helmet at the time.

  Lucas closed his eyes, wishing he could rid himself of the memories from five nights ago. But he could still hear the screams of Fire as he wielded the gun. Still felt the rumble of the parking garage as the motorcycle plowed into the wall. Still hear the voices of men and women as they worked around him, the steady beeping of the heart monitor telling everyone that Lucas was still alive.

  He’d clung to that monitoring beep, and he heard it all the time now, despite the fact that he wasn’t hooked to a machine like that anymore.

  His phone buzzed on the tray, and Lucas managed to open his eyes with some difficulty. The message was from his mother, and Lucas could hardly believe it.

  Heard you were injured. Can we come visit?

  “Who’s we, Mom?” he asked. He knew he hadn’t been a good son. His mother still lived in Forbidden Lake, but Lucas carried a lot of blame for her, as she hadn’t protected him from his father.

  Someone knocked on the door, a light, feminine knock that had Lucas’s heartbeat vibrating like he’d see Julie walk into the room. The door opened slowly, teasing him, and he saw the dark-haired woman as his hopes crashed.

  “Sabrina,” he said, surprised. Tears filled his eyes as his sister hurried toward him.

  “Lucas.” She bent over and drew him right into a hug. She cried with him as she clung to him, saying, “Noah’s coming up. Jordan called and said you were here.”

  “Did he?”

  “Why didn’t you call me?” Sabrina stepped back and looked at him, hurt in her eyes. Lucas couldn’t look away from her, though his guilt screamed at him to do so.

  “I didn’t have a phone,” he said.

  “You didn’t want to upset me.” She rested her hands on her very pregnant belly.

  “That too,” Lucas mumbled. Sabrina had been the best sister Lucas could ask for. He’d done everything he could to protect her from their father, and from anything else he could. He always wanted to shield those he loved from the more dangerous parts of life—especially any danger that could come to them because of his involvement in the Sentinels.

  You failed big time at that with Julie, he thought.

  “You should’ve had him call me immediately,” Sabrina said, her voice full of annoyance.

  “I’m sorry,” he said. “I’ve been kind of out of it.”

  Sabrina gave him a small smile and glanced over her shoulder. “I called Mom.”

  “Jordan must’ve given her my new number, too,” he said. “Because she just texted to say she wants to come see me.”

  “You should let her.” Sabrina sat heavily in the plastic chair Jordan had been in. “She’s seeing someone new, and he’s really nice.”

  Lucas’s jaw automatically clenched, and he looked away from his sister. Her husband entered the room, and Noah Summers was larger than life. He sold boats for a living, and he was really good at it. So good, he barely worked in the winter months, and he and Sabrina still seemed to have plenty of money.

  “Lucas.” He too bent over and hugged Lucas, whose ribs protested mightily. He groaned, and Noah stepped back. “Sorry, sorry.” He flashed a smile and went to stand beside Sabrina.

  “What are you guys doing today?”

  “Oh, nothing,” Sabrina said with a sigh. “Just waiting for this baby to come.”

  “And you still haven’t learned if it’s a boy or a girl?” Lucas grinned at the two of them. They’d been married for almost five years, and Sabrina had said she didn’t want to be a mother until she was sure she wouldn’t screw it all up. Lucas knew how she felt, though he felt like everything he touched grew mold at some point.

  “Not yet,” Sabrina said with a smile.

  “We’ll know any day now,” Noah said.

  “Any day? I thought you weren’t due until the beginning of February.”

  “Lucas, the beginning of February is next week,” Sabrina said with a smile. “How are you liking your job here at the hospital?”

  And just like that, the conversation between them was easy, as if no time had passed since Lucas had last told his sister everything about his life. He was very careful not to mention his lunches with Julie, or that he spent his breaks finding a remote waiting room and kissing her. Sabrina would be relentless in her communication if she knew he’d been seeing someone.

  “You look tired,” Sabrina said a while later. “We’ll go and let you rest.” She stood up, Noah assisting her as she did. Their love was always good for Lucas to see, as it showed him that not all relationships broke up.

  She hugged him again, and Lucas let his emotions surge and ebb without trying to hold them back. “Thanks for coming,” he said.

  “I’ll tell Mom to come,” Sabrina said.

  “I think I’m going home today,” Lucas said. “She doesn’t need to come here.” He hadn’t showered in a couple of days, and he didn’t need his mother here, fluttering around him. “I’ll call her in a little bit.” He really was too tired to deal with anything more right now.

  Noah and Sabrina left, and not two seconds later, the door opened again. Lucas almost growled, but the woman who walked in wore a no-nonsense smile on her face. “All right, Mister Miner. Time to get up and take a walk.”

  “I’m tired,” he said.

  The nurse positioned the walker she’d brought with her right next to his bed. “And your ribs need to know they don’t just get to lie around all day. Three times around, and you can take a nap while I work on your discharge papers.”

  “So I get to go home today?”

  Her eyes sparkled, but her smile didn’t yield. “If you take your walk.”

  Lucas sighed as he pulled back the thin blanket covering his legs. “Fine. You win.”

  “I always do, Mister Miner.”

  Lucas held onto the walker, which was too low for his tall frame, and steadied himself as he thought about Julie. Was she this ruthless with her patients? Did she always win when it was time to make injured people walk around?

  Probably, he thought with a smile. Probably.

  A week later, Lucas’s life was almost back to normal. He was sleeping in his own bed. Making bad coffee in the kitchen. Taking Smoky for walks. He and the dog didn’t go out for hours like they once had, nor did they go up to the National Forest and go through the woods. Lucas stuck to the paved, flat, cleared streets around the house so he didn’t have to focus on his footsteps quite so much. He was already so focused on moving without causing more pain to flare through him.

  He was back at
Ruby’s at night, even if there was no meeting. Mav and Karly invited him for dinner every night, and he went. He went, because he didn’t want to be isolated from the people so important to him.

  The difference between his biker brothers and Julie was that he believed Maverick, Vice, Electron, Bomber, Gramps, and the others wanted him around. Julie…well, Julie hadn’t tried to contact him.

  His phone mocked him constantly, as he had Julie’s number in it. He simply hadn’t used it. He’d asked Vice if it was her new number, and Vice had looked at him with flint in his eyes. “You haven’t called her yet?”

  No, Lucas hadn’t called her yet. His life had gone back to predictable and boring—and that was exactly what he needed right now. He couldn’t think for longer than a couple of hours, and Julie required a lot of brain power.

  “Okay,” Sabrina said as she pulled up to Lucas’s house. “I’m going in to be induced tomorrow, and Noah will call when the baby is born.”

  “Okay,” Lucas said. “It’s going to go so great.”

  Sabrina pressed her lips together and nodded, but Lucas could feel her anxiety permeate the whole car. They were alike in a lot of ways, only one of which was how much they worried about situations before they happened. He recognized himself as she’d driven him to the hospital to meet with his boss.

  Rudy was nothing but accommodating, and he said Lucas could have whatever time he needed to heal. They’d agreed that Lucas needed at least one more week, and they’d meet again. Lucas was desperately hoping he’d be well enough to do at least half a shift in a week, because he was bored out of his mind.

  He leaned across the console and hugged his sister. “Love you, Bri.”

  “Love you too, Luke.”

  He got out of her car at the same time another one pulled up to the curb in front of the house. Felicia often parked there, but this wasn’t her sedan. This car was much nicer and cost a whole lot more.

  And the man getting out was definitely much less welcome.