The Long Awaited Lord

by Deborah Wilson

  And if she did, Leo would help her get her settled and then never see her again.

  “Why are you borrowing a carriage? Why not use your own?” she asked.

  “I don’t have one.”

  She frowned and then shrugged before she started rocking the boy again. “Well, I suppose you wouldn’t necessarily need one if you lived in London. Do you live in London?”

  “On occasion.”

  “Where is home for you?” she asked.

  “I don’t have a home.”

  “So you have many?”

  “I have none.” Her cottage had been his first land purchase and it hadn’t even been for himself.

  Her eyes widened, and she stilled. “No home? Where do you keep all your things?”

  “In my bag.”

  “You mean the one you brought inside last evening? The same bag Edmond slept in?”

  He nodded. He was transfixed by the assortment of expressions that filled her face.

  “You only have the one bag?” she asked as though the very thought offended her.

  He chuckled. “It has my clothes, grooming supplies, and weapons. What more would I need?”

  She was astounded. Then her mouth fell open. “Don’t tell me that you used the last bit of your money on buying me that cottage? Leo—”

  He lifted his hand. “I have money.” He had more money than he knew what to do with. He had no land to tend. No employees to pay. He invested. He made profits. His largest expense was Wess’ education. “You’ve no need to worry.”

  But she did worry. He could see it in her eyes. They went soft for him. He liked that expression as well. “The room. That’s why you were surprised by it. You don’t have a room. You don’t even have a home.”

  The room had been unexpected. She’d even put music sheets on the wall in polished frames. She’d done it for him. She hadn’t understood the depths of her gift. Leo hadn’t even known he’d wanted one until that moment.

  “If I keep the cottage, the room is yours,” she told him with a smile. “Forever.”

  He returned her smile but didn’t take her words seriously even though he knew they’d been genuinely offered. A woman like Madison would not stay unwed. She would marry below her station and her husband would never allow another man to occupy his domain.

  Leo knew he wouldn’t.

  But Leo allowed himself to imagine a life in Madison’s presence. Her breakfast hadn’t been terrible. The bread had been slightly burnt, but overall, he’d eaten well. She’d get better in time and her son would get bigger.

  The boy… Edmond would grow up with Leo’s influence. And likely become a monster.

  A sour taste filled his mouth.

  “Are you excited about seeing your parents?” Leo asked.

  “Nervous, but yes.” She bit her lip. “I already know my mother will cry with happiness.” Her eyes glowed with warmth.

  There had been little awkwardness between them that morning. He’d tried to get his own breakfast and they’d fallen into a debate about who would serve who. Then she’d laughed and left to feed Edmond in her room, leaving Leo to make his own plate and clean afterward.

  It had felt very odd and very normal at the same time, almost as if they’d had the argument a dozen times before. The kiss they’d shared hadn’t seemed to matter in the light of day. Madison’s spirits had been high with the knowledge that she would see her parents.

  Her happiness had eased the tension in Leo. Her smile calmed him. His current state of contentment was new to him. He liked it but told himself not to get used to it. He could enjoy it today, but tomorrow he would distance himself from Madison and her child. He could not afford to crave this condition of bliss. He was not the settling sort.

  His work would come first.

  He counted delivering Madison to her parents as part of his job. Lady Van Dero would think well of Leo once news of his assistance in this matter reached her ears. The Duchess of Van Dero was aware of the power her husband held and made strides to make his operations less dead and kinder.

  What was more kind than helping a mother and her child?

  Leo walked beside Madison to her front door.

  It opened before they reached it and Lady Cumpterton rushed out and scooped the baby into her arms. Then, just as Madison predicted, the woman burst into tears. She clung to Madison with one arm and her grandson in the other.

  Her words were unintelligible, but Madison nodded a few times and continued to smile as tears slipped down her cheeks.

  Lord Cumpterton shook Leo’s hand. “Thank you for bringing her home.”

  “My pleasure.” Leo would leave word with Madison’s father where he could be reached. Leo would stay in town until Madison reached her decision.

  He’d leave the family alone.

  Lord Cumpterton dropped his hand.

  Leo cleared his throat. “My lord—”

  “Leo, I can’t thank you enough!” Lord Cumpterton’s arm went around Leo’s shoulder as he ushered him inside. Leo walked forward because he’d been left with no choice. The door closed behind him.

  Lady Cumpterton and Madison walked into the drawing room.

  Madison’s father followed, but then stopped and turned to Leo with a frown. “Don’t dally. The family is in here.” He disappeared into the drawing room.

  Leo stayed by the door, listening to the laughs and shouts of amusement. He didn’t belong here. He decided he’d leave the name of the inn with a servant.

  But then Lord Cumpterton came out. “Leo, come on.” He sounded irritated, as though Leo were holding the family back from their occasion.

  But that wasn’t possible. Leo wasn’t part of the family.

  “I thought you’d like to speak to Madison alone.”

  “Why? According to what I read, you’re a part of this,” Lord Cumpterton said.

  “Not really.” Leo wondered what Matthew had written about him in the papers. He hadn’t gone over the fine details. Leo didn’t think himself necessary for the tale.

  Lord Cumpterton narrowed his eyes. “So, it’s not true then?”

  “What’s not true?”

  “Leo.” Madison did not seem pleased.

  Leo walked into the drawing room.

  Madison held the paper in her hands. Her face switched between worried and anger.

  Lady Cumpterton, who couldn’t see it, was smiling at the baby when she asked, “When’s the wedding?”

  Leo didn’t answer, because surely, the woman was speaking to someone else.

  But then she looked up at Leo with expectant eyes. “It will be soon, of course. We shouldn’t delay these things.” Then she sighed. “I couldn’t be happier, honestly. At least I’ll actually get to see this wedding. Well, you weren’t actually married to Lord Hivers, so I didn’t necessarily miss that wedding, but I was upset when I thought I had.” Lady Cumpterton shook her head and took another breath. “But this is good. This is so much better. Don’t you think so?” She turned to her husband as he walked into the room.

  Lord Cumpterton moved and stood by the fireplace. He looked between Leo and Madison. Then he settled on Leo. “Is there something you’d like to tell me?”

  ∫ ∫ ∫

  3 5

  * * *

  Leo made certain his face was blank. He was confused, but confusion didn’t seem appropriate at the moment. Cumpterton looked ready to string him up and though Leo didn’t fear the threat, it troubled him that Cumpterton was troubled.

  “Matthew lied.” Madison slapped the paper on the tea table. “He is a liar.”

  “Is the baby Judd’s?” Lord Cumpterton asked.

  “Yes,” Madison answered.

  “Was Judd murdered?” her father asked.

  “Yes.”

  “Did Matthew take you in to protect you from the murderer, believing he would come for the child?”

  “No!” Madison stood. “Matthew had other reasons for holding me in that house against my will. He is no hero.” She swa
llowed and looked at Leo. “Leo saved me. Leo is the only one who saved me.” Her eyes filled with tears, and her body was visibly shaking.

  Leo’s feet moved, one right after the other, until he was beside her. Her arms went around him and his eyes widened, but then he made his face neutral again. At least, he hoped his fear didn’t show.

  She buried her face in his chest. “Leo, I’m so sorry,” she whispered. She was trembling.

  Believing she’d collapse, he put his arms around her.

  She kept talking through her tears. “You were there for me when I had no one else.” Her voice cracked on the last word.

  Leo tightened his hold and spoke low and close to her ear. “Calm down, Madison. I’m still here.” Even as he spoke, he kept his eyes on Cumpterton.

  The man had schooled his own expression and locked Leo away from his thoughts.

  Was he angry?

  “It’s the baby,” Lady Cumpterton tsked. “I was the same way after Morgan. I would cry at the littlest of matters, didn’t I, Morgan?”

  At the sound of his name, Lord Cumpterton turned to his wife. “Helen, take the baby to our room. He’s asleep and I don’t want him disturbed.”

  His wife nodded. “Yes. I’ll tend to the baby.” She seemed pleased to leave. She was the sort of woman who enjoyed ‘her place’, Leo thought. She liked being a woman and doing all the things Society thought she should.

  She loved her husband, enjoyed children, and kept a happy home.

  Leo thought Madison had taken on some of that nurturing spirit. She’d made that cottage a home for her and Edmond. Leo had no doubt that Edmond would grow up happy in his mother’s care.

  He rubbed Madison’s back and continued to whisper reassurances in her ear.

  “I’m sorry,” she whispered.

  He frowned. “What for?”

  She pulled away and tilted her tear-stained face up to him. “Matthew ruined you as well.”

  “How so?”

  Lord Cumpterton cleared his throat. “The paper says once you learned that Madison was not his wife, you ran off together. Instead of bringing her home, you kept her.” There was a touch of accusation in his tone.

  He had kept her, Leo realized that just as he realized he hadn’t needed to. He could have taken her to parents, and they all could have disappeared for a time. Safe in the custody of her father, Madison’s reputation wouldn’t have been soiled yet again.

  “She’s been with three men now,” Cumpterton said. “Judd, Matthew, and you.”

  “I never…” He was going to say he’d never touched her, but after last night, that wasn’t true.

  He’d kissed her. He’d touched her.

  “I was never that way with Matthew.” Madison took her arms from around Leo but only to place them on his chest. She remained close as if seeking strength from him. Was she aware of it?

  “It doesn’t matter,” her father said. “All that will matter is what this paper says. Perhaps, people will forgive you for pretending to be Matthew’s wife. It is an honorable thing to protect your best friend’s son. However…” His eyes moved between her and Leo once more. “This, people will not forgive.”

  “I hate him,” Madison whispered. She was staring at Leo’s shirt, glaring. Leo imagined were Matthew in the room, he’d not make it out alive.

  She was upset because yet again, she’d have to enter another false marriage.

  But only if she chose to stay in Oxford.

  Leo looked at Cumpterton. “May I speak with her alone?”

  The earl nodded and left the room, but he kept the door open.

  Leo used his handkerchief to wipe Madison’s tears away. Then he cupped her cheeks. “You don’t have to stay in Oxford. You can move and be free.”

  She shook her head. “I can’t take Edmond from them. My father won’t say it, but he misses my brother and he’d miss me. I can’t leave Oxford. I can’t become someone else.” Her eyes pleaded with him.

  Fear ran cold through Leo’s blood. This was what he got for being helpful. He should hate Matthew but couldn’t find the energy to lend toward the emotion.

  He was trapped. He was angry about that but not angry enough to not put Madison’s happiness first. “What do you want?” he asked with fear caught in his throat.

  “I want to stay, and I don’t want Edmond to grow up mistreated.”

  “They will mistreat him even if we wed.”

  Wed. He felt a panic growing within him at the mention of the word.

  She shook her head and sniffed. She was so beautiful it was heartbreaking. “Oxford loves you. They came in droves to hear you teach. You were captivating and persuasive. You can convince them of anything. You can convince them to love Edmond. Maybe even me?”

  He felt like he was being ripped apart. “And you’d be happy? Even if it means never having what you had with Judd again?”

  She blinked. “I don’t want what I had with Judd.” Her voice grew firm. “I don’t want Judd at all.”

  Leo felt the pounding of his heart stop just as another pounding began below his waist. He stroked Madison’s cheeks with his thumbs. “What are you saying?”

  Her eyes darkened, the tears burned away. “I want you.”

  He tightened his hold on her and groaned. “Madison…”

  “I like the way you say my name,” she whispered, her eyes on his mouth. “Why don’t you call me Maddie?”

  He tried to cool his blood, but his desire for this woman made him dizzy. “Maddie makes me think of a child. You’re no child. You’re very much a woman.”

  She slid her hands down to his waist and gripped his hips. Then she looked into his eyes again. “What do you want?”

  He shook his head. “Not this.” At her stricken expression, he said, “I want you to be happy.”

  “I am happy when I’m with you.” Her eyes began to fill again, and she bit her lower lip. “Leo… I feel so safe with you. When I’m with you, everything feels right.”

  He closed his eyes. He felt the same. But wasn’t it wrong? “You were Matthew’s wife when we met.”

  She slid her hands back up his chest. “I was never his wife.” Her hands kept going, over his shoulders, around his neck, and into his hair.

  Leo hardened as she caressed him. “Madison. I’ve coveted. I didn’t know you weren’t married when I started to…”

  “When you started to fall for me?” she whispered.

  He opened his eyes, shocked that she knew what he intended to say. With the knowledge that he’d just made himself vulnerable to her, he stiffened and tried to detach his mind from her physical touch. He told himself her words and caresses meant nothing.

  He would not be hurt again.

  She smiled. “I was falling for you as well.” Then she frowned. “Even when you were at your worst, I was still drawn to you. I’ve committed no sin and you never acted on your feelings.”

  “I did. I stole you from Matthew.” He grabbed her shoulders and looked her dead in the eyes. “That is what I did, Madison. I didn’t rescue you. I took you, even knowing there was a possibility that you were lying. I’m a thief and I do bad things, as you know.”

  “I know,” she whispered. “But maybe you can stop. Maybe I can help you. I want to help you, Leo. I care about you.”

  He slid his arms around her waist. “You want to help, but it’s not that easy.”

  “I haven’t known easy for a long time.” The past few months had been hard for her. Living with the idea that her child would be taken from her, Leo couldn’t imagine the pain.

  She touched his cheek. “Would you like a home, Leo? Would you like a place of your very own with people who are happy to see you after a long business journey and welcome you with open arms? And my parents, they’d be your parents too. You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

  His mouth fell open. “You’d use my weakness against me? My loneliness?”

  “If it benefits you.” There was no shame in her gaze. “My father likes you. He
’d adore you as a son-in-law.”

  He should be upset, but instead, he pulled her closer. He’d taken her once. Could he go all the way? He’d never stayed in one place for long.

  But she’d mentioned business journeys. She knew he wouldn’t stay around long. He could be in and out. Edmond would have little of his terrible influence.

  And she could be his lighthouse in the storm. His place of comfort. Knowing she was home, knowing that she was his, would help him get through his worst bouts of loneliness.

  He slipped one of her dark curls behind her ear. “Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?”

  She smiled. “Yes.”

  ∫ ∫ ∫

  3 6

  * * *

  Madison woke in the middle of the night three weeks later. She could see nothing in the dark, but if she turned on a light and looked at a clock, she knew it would be close to the time she rose to feed Edmond. He’d formed a routine in the last few weeks and her body had adjusted to it.

  She listened for him but heard nothing. She was on her way back to sleep when she decided to whisper, “Leo?”

  “Yes?” There was no sleep in his voice, which told her he’d been up for some time.

  She rolled over and his arm went around her. She settled her body close to his and his mouth naturally found hers in the dark. She smiled against his lips. Her hands slid down his breeches.

  He was wearing breeches in the middle of the night.

  “You’re going out?” she asked.

  He kissed her long and deep. She forgot about her question until he answered a second later, “I thought I was quiet. I didn’t want to disturb you.”

  She wrapped her legs around him when he began to pull away. “Where are you going?”

  “Business in town.” He lowered himself, fit his body nicely between hers, and groaned. “Have you forgotten?” He found her mouth again. “I didn’t come to Oxford to rescue you.” He gave her another kiss. “Or fall in love with you.” Another and Madison was moaning underneath him. “Or marry you…” His mouth trailed down her chin. “And yet I did all three.” He bit her throat.

  She gasped and gripped his shirt when he started to pull away. “Don’t leave me like this.” She was aching. “I need you.”