The Past Between Us

by Kimberly Van Meter

  But it was too late. “Cassi,” he called her name softly. She reluctantly met his gaze. “Come here,” he instructed.

  “Why?”

  “Just do it.”

  “A minute ago you said—”

  “I know what I said. Just come here.”

  “When’d you get so bossy,” she grumbled, but she slowly closed the distance between them. In spite of the circumstances, her heart rate kicked up a beat just being so near to him. She didn’t want to be this close to him without a purpose or plan to put into play. This felt real and was something she’d thought of many times when she’d been cold, hungry and lost, yet her pride and fear had kept her from picking up the phone. “You don’t want to do this, remember?” she said, her voice a husky whisper.

  “I never said I didn’t want to…I said I wouldn’t,” he corrected her, his hands at her waist drawing her to him.

  “What’s the difference?” she asked. The wild, intense heat in his eyes turned her knees to jelly, and a shake had begun to steal the strength from her legs. Her hands came to rest on his shoulders for support as much as anything else, for she felt ready to slide to the floor.

  “The difference is now you’re being sincere. You’re not playing an angle to get something from me.”

  “How do you know?” she said.

  “Because I can see it in your eyes and hear it in your voice. Whatever you’re feeling right now is real and it hurts.”

  God, he was right. Damn him for knowing her so well even after all these years. His next statement nearly did her in.

  “Cassi, I would’ve been there for you. Despite all that’d been said between us, I would’ve dropped everything to help you. You have to know that, right?”

  “No, I don’t know that,” she lied, blinking away the hot moisture. She swallowed. “I don’t know that now.”

  His mouth tightened with displeasure at her continued mulishness but he seemed to understand where it was coming from. “I would’ve done whatever I could to help you. I promise you.”

  “What does it matter? I didn’t come to you and I made my bed, right?”

  “Cassi…”

  “I don’t need you to save me,” she snapped bitterly. “I’m doing just fine on my own.”

  His arched brow said he didn’t agree but her pride had its demands and she couldn’t say otherwise. They were in a standoff and Cassi didn’t expect his next request so when it came she was caught off guard.

  “I’m here for you now. Will you trust me?”

  Time stopped with that single, loaded question. Trust him? She couldn’t trust anyone. She had a price on her head and there was a man who would stop at nothing to keep his secret. But this was Tommy asking the question and she wanted to say yes. She wanted to simply nod and allow him to fix this problem. It was weak and sad and when this whole mess started she swore she’d never put herself in a situation where she felt either of those things. Yet, here she was…staring into the eyes of the man she should’ve been smart enough to marry, and content to have his babies—but she hadn’t. She’d been stupid and hurtful and…naive about her place in the world and so had lost everything that had ever mattered. “I…” Want to. Desperately. But the truth was…she didn’t know how to trust any longer. She was caught in a permanent cycle of fight or flight and she didn’t know how to respond to something outside of those parameters. She couldn’t tell him that, either. She ran the tip of her tongue along her bottom lip and Tommy’s gaze fastened on the movement with an expression that was feral and achingly delicious, and she answered the only way she could, given the circumstances. “Yes, Tommy,” she said. “I trust you.”

  Even if it was a total lie.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  THOMAS’S HEART THRILLED at her words and relief followed, even if it was short-lived. He pushed away the grim leer of reality, knowing deep down that the odds were slim that she was telling the truth, but he so wanted to believe her. He wanted her to be innocent of the charges leveled against her, he wanted to believe that there was a very good reason for the things she’d done.

  But at the moment, he wanted to savor whatever was happening between them.

  She leaned into him and he allowed the gentle pressure to take them both down on the bed. She was lying with her leg thrown across his thighs with her head propped up by her elbow. “So what now?” she asked, gazing at him, waiting.

  “In what context?” he countered.

  She smiled. “In the context where I’m sprawled on top of you and we’re both—” she glanced down at the obvious bulge in his jeans “—interested in seeing what happens next.”

  He reached over and smoothed her brown hair, tucking it behind her ear. He’d always loved her golden hair but she looked pretty good as a brunette, too. There’d been many times he imagined this moment but it had never felt like this. He could smell the sweet scent of her skin, her hair and that unique blend that was just her. It was branded into his memory. Had he ever hoped to find someone else to replace her in his heart and mind? He’d been a fool to think he could do this job and not be affected. He wanted her so badly his teeth ached but there were rules, and if he was going to find a way to help her, he had to keep the lines drawn. He closed his eyes briefly and prayed for strength, then gently disentangled himself from beneath her firm and inviting body.

  “Oh, so I guess nothing is going to happen,” she surmised, plainly disappointed. “I guess it’s for the best. No sense in complicating things, right?”

  “Yeah.” He sat up and she scooted against the headboard and folded her arms across her chest. He paused, waiting for his head to clear enough to speak coherently. His hormones were still doing flybys in his brain. “It’s already complicated,” he said, earning a frown from Cassie. “I’m going to do what I can to help you figure this out but if we start sleeping together…I’m afraid…well, it’s just a bad idea.”

  She nodded, but she still had that vulnerable vibe about her, as if she didn’t know how to process the logic behind the rejection. “So, how are you going to help me?” she finally asked.

  “Well,” he started, relieved to focus on something relatively safe between them. He needed it to get his head on straight. “I’ve already made some calls to a friend and he’s running down some information on those old ladies you befriended in Virginia. Seems both recently made some hefty deposits.”

  “I didn’t steal from them,” she said, her frown deepening. “I mean, I borrowed a little but not enough to put them in a bad spot.”

  “According to the file, both ladies claim you bilked them out of their savings four months ago, which came to about five thousand dollars apiece.” At her stunned expression, he decided either she was an amazing liar or she was truly shocked at the news. “But a few days ago, each one deposited thirty thousand dollars. Did either of them have family who might’ve left them an inheritance?”

  Cassi thought for a moment then shrugged. “I don’t know. I didn’t get to know them that well. I was chasing down a lead and they were nice to me. Basically, I borrowed about five hundred dollars from Barbara from a jar she used to collect money for her yearly gambling trip and about seven hundred from Winifred that she kept in a shoe box under her bed, but she had about two thousand dollars in that box. I’m telling you…I didn’t bankrupt them. I would never do that.”

  “So why are they lying?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “So why those two?”

  She sighed. “By sheer luck I’d found a picture of Lionel on a Google search, except he didn’t go under the name of Lionel Vissher. He was Lionel Proctor. I never considered that he might be living under an alias. So I started digging. That’s how I found Barbara and Winifred. They worked at the library where I would use the computers. They took me in when I had nowhere to go.”

  “And then you stole from them?”

  She stiffened. “Why do you have to say it like that?”

  “Like how?”

  “Like I’m
some kind of vile swindler of old ladies or something.”

  “Cassi…I’m sorry if you don’t like the facts but we need to consider all details. While you may have thought these little old ladies were sweet, it would seem they sold you out.”

  At that, she lost her quills. “Right,” she admitted. “I’d forgotten that part.” She seemed at a loss. “I don’t know why they did that. I mean, I suppose anyone has a price and whoever paid them off offered them enough to make it worth their while.”

  “So what did you discover in Virginia?” he asked.

  “Lionel Proctor was married to a wealthy woman who died unexpectedly. They’d only been married two years.”

  “Did you find out how she died?”

  “Yeah, Winifred’s daughter worked as a nurse at the hospital where Lydia Proctor died. She died of natural causes but she’d been pretty sick, just like my mom.”

  “Did you tell anyone?”

  She shook her head. “No way. The last time I started making accusations or even pointing fingers in the direction of Lionel Vissher I lost everything. I needed to gather enough evidence to hang him, not just piss him off further. This man is dangerous. I’ve learned a lot in the past two years. Anyone who crosses him doesn’t live to talk about it.”

  “He can’t be that badass,” Thomas said, a small smile lifting the corner of his mouth, but she just shook her head. “Okay, I see what you’re saying about there being a possible similarity. I’m surprised no one else saw it and questioned him, at the very least insisted on an autopsy for your mother.”

  “That’s just it, Lionel ingratiates himself to the people in his circles. No one believed me because…well, I’d already screwed up before that and I’d lost credibility. I think he planned it that way.”

  “How so?”

  “Well, it’s only a theory, but in the research I’ve done, every woman he’s been connected with had two things in common—first, they were rich and second, they didn’t have a lot of family or the family they did have were black sheep. My mother fit the bill perfectly.”

  He mulled the information around in his head. Cassi would’ve made a good investigator. Without resources, she’d managed to scrounge up this information using nothing more than her wits. But it’d taken its toll, he knew. He glanced back at her and he could see the fatigue pulling at her, painting dark smudges under her eyes and whittling away any extra body fat.

  It was late. There was little they could do at the moment. He hadn’t exactly made up his mind if he believed her but she’d created sufficient question as to whether she was guilty or not. So, for the time being, he figured it couldn’t hurt to investigate things a little further. Besides, keeping her close, even under the guise of helping her, would preclude him from having to chase her all over the eastern seaboard. If the time came and he had to haul her in, after all, she was conveniently already in his possession. He could very well lose his job over this, he realized. But he was going to try to avoid that. He’d see what he could do without his supervisor knowing. He could make calls, make a few inquiries. But in the meantime, he had to make sure Cassi didn’t run off again. He wasn’t so naive—or at least he wasn’t now after she’d made him look like a fool twice already—to think she’d stay put simply because he asked.

  “Let’s call it a night,” he suggested as he pulled out his handcuffs. Her eyes widened and she gave him a hard stare but he had no choice. “We have a ways to go before we’re BFFs, Cassi. You’re in my custody until I say otherwise. I’m going to help you but until I can trust you…you’re staying put.”

  “I promise—”

  “Sorry,” he cut her off, steeling himself against the plaintive look and the wounded tone in her voice. “You seem to suffer from an allergy to the truth. I can’t have you run off again on some misguided attempt to fix this on your own.”

  “I was doing just fine until you came along and screwed everything up,” she reminded him, throwing him a dark look as he clicked the cuff on her right wrist and then the other on his own. She looked at him, surprised. “How are we going to sleep like this?”

  He grinned, and damn if he didn’t enjoy it a little as he answered with a shrug, “Together I guess. I hope you don’t snore. I’m a light sleeper.”

  CASSI STARED, NOT QUITE able to believe that Tommy had the balls to handcuff her after everything she’d just told him, and that he’d cuffed her to him.

  This was wrong on so many levels. But she hadn’t a choice except to allow him to curl up beside her. He kicked off his shoes but otherwise remained dressed and then tucked her into his side as if they were two spoons in a drawer. He even wrapped his arm around her middle, ostensibly for her comfort and then with his breath tickling the tiny hairs on her neck, he dropped off as if they were lazing in a cabana somewhere enjoying a siesta before dinner.

  Which they certainly were not.

  She held herself stiff and rigid, not wanting her backside to touch his front but that got uncomfortable quickly so when she was certain he was asleep, she allowed herself to relax, settling against the solid warmth of his chest and snuggling into the heat that emanated from his body. It wasn’t long before she dropped off and slept like a rock for the first time in years.

  She awoke with a start, panicked when she didn’t recognize her surroundings and then groaned when her arm started to tingle from sleeping on her side all night.

  Tommy rolled to his back in his sleep and she yelped when he took her arm with him. He came to with a grogginess that might’ve been adorable if she hadn’t been in pain. “Tommy, wake up, you’re killing my arm,” she snapped. She’d never been a morning person even under the best of circumstances. She’d expected him to move or get up but he did neither. Instead, he picked her up and rolled her on top of him. “What are you doing?” she exclaimed, knocking him in the chest with her free hand. Then, he seemed to finally wake up and he looked chagrined to find where he’d perched her. She scooted off him and he held up his manacled hand to give her more room.

  “Sorry,” he mumbled, sleep roughing his voice. He scrubbed his face with his free hand and seemed to shake off the cobwebs.

  Damn. Why did he have to be so handsome? He grabbed the key and unlocked the cuff from his own wrist but kept hers on. She frowned at him. He responded with a shoulder shrug. “Trust, remember? We need showers. How do you want to do this?”

  She blinked, heat flooding her cheeks and other places at the thought. “What do you mean?”

  “Well, if I shower that’ll leave you unattended. And there’s nothing in this place to handcuff you to that you couldn’t bust free from. Everything here is made of flimsy wood that would shatter easily. So, I ask again…how do we accomplish basic hygiene?”

  “You are not going to stand next to me while I pee,” she said, balking. “Or anything else for that matter.”

  He laughed. “The bathroom doesn’t have any windows for you to crawl out of so I think it’s okay to allow you some privacy there. The question is what do I do with you while I shower?”

  “Maybe you’ll just have to make the sacrifice and go without,” she countered sweetly.

  “I wouldn’t be the one making the sacrifice. I’m a guy. I can go without a shower for days but I’ve been told the female nose is far more sensitive to those social niceties.”

  She made a face. Eww. He had a point. Especially if he planned to continue their sleeping arrangements the way they were last night. She lifted her chin and tried a disinterested shrug. “It’s nothing I haven’t seen before. If you’re so worried about me escaping I guess you can handcuff me to the toilet while you shower.”

  She was a damn fine actress. The very thought of sitting docilely while he showered was enough to set her teeth on edge. By the way he grinned, she wondered if he saw through her bluff and enjoyed pushing her to catch her reaction. Well, two could play that game. She studied her fingernail. “Or we could just be adults about it and conserve water by showering together,” she suggested.
>
  He looked ready to bolt and she privately crowed. Don’t run with the big dogs if you’re still whizzing like a puppy. She smothered a smirk as he glowered. “That’s not going to happen,” he said.

  She shrugged. “Whatever. Your loss.”

  He unlocked her cuff and she rubbed at the chafed skin as he gestured toward the bathroom. “Go do what you need to do. I have some phone calls to make,” he said.

  “What about you?” she asked innocently as she sauntered to the bathroom.

  “I’ll go without today,” he muttered, and she closed the door on her own laughter.

  CHAPTER NINE

  THOMAS HEARD THE WATER running and Cassi humming to herself through the thin wall separating the bathroom from the bedroom and he shuddered at the thought of her, naked, water sluicing over her body, sliding over places he ached to touch and feel himself.

  Last night he’d slept like a baby. Surprising, because he’d been tormented by the feel of lying so close to Cassi and unable to do anything about it. Yet, within moments his eyelids drooped and he was out like a light. It’d felt good. He couldn’t remember the last time he slept so soundly.

  But now, he was tormented in a different way. He wanted her so badly he was nearly obsessed with thoughts of her. He had to shake it off if he was going to find a way out of this mess for her.

  Thomas grabbed the disposable cell and swore under his breath when he realized he’d forgotten to charge it and it’d died. The disposables weren’t all that great for holding a charge and he should’ve figured that. He plugged it in and then sat at the small, wobbly table to make some notes.

  Moments later he heard the door open and he refrained from turning around. With his luck she was standing there with nothing but a towel covering her. That’s all he needed. He was only human for crap’s sake.

  “You sure you don’t want to rinse off?” she asked. “I promise I won’t run.”

  He turned and was relieved to see her dressed and actually looking sincere. He was tempted but he declined. Besides, maybe if he stank like a dog it’d keep his head where it belonged—on the case instead of on the uncomfortable fit of his jeans. Sadly that kind of logic didn’t hold up. He could be marinating in his own filth and still want to get her naked.