Love You So Hard

by Tara Lain

  Craig nodded and blinked. A grin broke through. “Hell, we could put you on gay recruiting posters.”

  Jesse tightened his grip. “Would you sign up?” He stared at Craig with those blue, blue eyes.

  Could Craig melt into that hot gaze? “Every day.”

  “So how do you want to improve your gay-boy skills tonight, my favorite top?”

  God, Jesse said such great things. “Get on your hands and knees, you sassy bottom.”

  Jesse’s smile pushed dimples into his cheeks. “You got it, boss.” He turned that well-toned ass right at Craig. Starting in doggy position, he lowered his head to the bed and waggled his butt. Oh God.

  Craig took a deep breath. He didn’t want to mess this up. He reached out and separated those pink cheeks even farther. Jesse made a hissing sound. Craig leaned in and kissed Jesse’s butt, then sidled over and insinuated his tongue into the valley, questing until he made contact with the pucker and licked around it.

  “Ooooh.” Jesse’s voice trembled.

  Craig pulled back a little. “I think you like that.”

  “Oh baby, you found me out.” His bottom wagged for more.

  Craig pressed in even farther, flattening his tongue and licking all over that tight hole. Jesse smelled like soap and tasted musky and clean at the same time. Okay, bull’s-eye. Craig curled his tongue into a tube, pulled even harder on Jesse’s cheeks, and insinuated his tongue into the pucker. It gave way and accepted the probing.

  “Oh baby, oh God, that’s so great. Please don’t stop. Please.”

  In his whole life, no one had ever begged him for anything. He wanted to rim Jesse’s hole forever just to hear him plead. But the begging changed.

  “Fuck me, baby. Please. Do it now.” He cocked his head back toward Craig as he wailed.

  Craig sat up and stared at that pretty face all screwed up in desire and wanting. Desire for him. And just like that, he felt like a top. Maybe he really was a man someone else could want—could want to care for them, work for them, create success for them. Make love to them. If Jesse wanted him, could the world be far behind?

  Jesse kept whimpering while Craig scrambled to the bedside table for a condom and some lube. He’d always stored these for his partners since they tended to be forgetful in the safe sex arena. Now he needed them.

  His cock was pressing against his abdomen and making little wet tracks on his skin. He grabbed it, rolled on a condom, and slapped on some lube. Now for the fun part of preparation. Lube on two fingers, he gently inserted them into Jesse’s waggling butt. Ohhh, he loved that hot, tight place.

  “That’s good but hurry, baby. Need you in there. Go fast.”

  Jesse did feel pretty open. Craig coated all the warm slick insides with his fingers, then pulled out and poised his cock at the shiny opening.

  Jesse stared back at him, his cheek pressed against the mattress, wild blue eyes blinking. “Do it, do it, do it!”

  Craig did it. Flashing a smile at his sweet lover, he leaned forward and pressed his cock into its home base.

  “Oooohhhhhhh.” The long moaning sigh slipped from between Jesse’s lips.

  “I’ve got what you need, darling.” Did he really just say that? He froze. Who was the guy making that claim?

  “Fuck meeeeee.”

  Oh yeah. He was that guy.

  Craig pulled his dick out to the tip and snapped it back in. Crap, that felt good. Let’s do it again. Oh, oh, yeah. Flashes of electricity lit up his balls.

  Jesse was going nuts. No more head on the mattress, he was up on his hands and knees, pushing back as hard as he could. Craig banged forward and Jesse slammed back. The impact bounced their balls together, which was too fantastic to believe. In all his life, he hadn’t imagined a moment this perfect. The top of his head about to explode with pleasure, his cock buried in paradise, and this near-perfect, smart, gorgeous, cool, amazing guy screaming his name. Did he deserve this much joy? Oh, hell yes.

  “Harder, baby, harder.”

  Craig pounded, letting his hips snap like they were on elastic, and every thrust about blacked him out with intensity.

  Jesse clawed at the covers. “Coming. So close.”

  Craig leaned over Jesse’s back and smelled the sweat and the sweetness of the lean, hard body. He grabbed Jesse’s cock with his hand. One pump. It seemed to expand impossibly in his hand. Two pumps. Pow. Hot cum squirted out onto the white sheets.

  “Ohhh yesssss.” Jesse’s body trembled and spasmed as jet after jet of juice flew out of him.

  Craig held Jesse tight through the orgasm, then pulled back and ripped off two more pumps until his balls gave up their load and his whole body shook in time with Jesse’s.

  Craig rode Jesse’s body down to the mattress. Flop. A heap of humans.

  The little chuckle started. God, he loved that sound. The sound that meant Jesse was a happy man. He couldn’t help it. He started to giggle too.

  Finally they both stopped laughing. Craig took a deep breath. “Jesse.”

  “Yeah.”

  “Do you think you could show me that Laguna apartment tomorrow?”

  Chapter EIGHT

  CRAIG SLIPPED out of the bedroom and gently closed the door, giving Jesse a few more minutes. What an exciting day lay ahead. A possible new apartment in beautiful Laguna Beach. Wow. What would that be like? And Jesse even suggested they might look at a car or two. What a tutor.

  He sighed, sat at the table, and opened his laptop. His screen sprang to life and started downloading his emails. Tutor. Was it really dumb to fall for your teacher? Maybe it was just gratitude? Yeah, fat chance.

  He looked at the email. Oh my God. One of the leads Jesse had uncovered had already answered. Craig almost didn’t want to look. He stuck out one finger and opened it. Oh, okay. Just an acknowledgment of receipt of his résumé and to let him know it was being considered. Whew. That made his heart beat fast.

  He closed the document and scrolled. Stopped. The headhunter. Executive search. The one he’d answered on a whim. They’d replied—holy crap, last night. He hadn’t checked. He swallowed hard. Here comes the laughter.

  He opened it and scanned. Then just stared.

  Jesse’s voice came from behind him, but it felt like a long way. “Hey, baby, what’s going on?”

  He opened his mouth, but nothing came out.

  “Craig? What’s wrong?”

  Craig looked over his shoulder into the blue of those eyes. “I, uh, sent my résumé to this executive search person for a job at ClearWater Technology. I never thought—” He swallowed.

  “What? Let me see.” Jesse peered over Craig’s shoulder. “Oh my God.” He looked at his watch. “Quick, hit reply. Tell her you missed the email last night but could come today if they still want you to.”

  Craig shook his head. “I don’t know.” Graduation.

  Jesse kissed his cheek. “Do it.”

  “Okay.” He whipped off a quick message and hit Send. “It’s probably too late.”

  “Maybe.” Jesse wrapped his arms around Craig and kissed his lips gently. “And maybe not. You can wear that new suit. But it’s a tech company, so no tie, okay?”

  “I’m sure it’s—”

  The soft bong of a new email interrupted him. They both stared at the screen. Jesse giggled and clicked the mouse.

  So happy you got the message. You’re scheduled for eleven thirty. You’ll be meeting with the CMO, Alexandra Herschel. She’s going out of town this evening and wanted to meet you before she left. Good luck. Milly.

  “This is crazy.” His voice came out in a squeak.

  “Crazy good. You’ve got two hours. Let’s get you dressed, and I’ll take you to the coffee shop for breakfast and show you off.” Jesse pulled on his arms.

  Craig pulled back. Oh God, his heart was going to give out. He couldn’t do this. “I should never have sent that dumb résumé. It makes me sound too good. I can’t live up to it.”

  Jesse knelt in front of him. “Did w
e tell a single lie?”

  “No, but the way you put it together….” He shook his head.

  “It’s called marketing, baby. Come on. Let’s get that suit on you.”

  ONE HOUR and forty-five minutes later, he sat in his car in the parking lot outside ClearWater Tech, a sprawling midrise building in Irvine. The new suit was choking him. Okay, not choking. He wasn’t even wearing a tie. But it felt so—tight.

  “You look great, baby, and you’re going to knock them dead.”

  If he didn’t die first. His hands wouldn’t stop shaking. Some impression he’d make. He nodded and stared at his lap. Talk about mixed feelings.

  Jesse grabbed his head and pulled their faces close together. That must look great inside the building. “Craig Elson, you’re a top. There’s nobody better than you at what you do, whether it’s marketing or fucking. Whatever you learned at your father’s knee was wrong, baby. Who are you going to believe? Him or me? I don’t lie. You’ve got everything this job needs and more. They should be so lucky. If you don’t get it, who cares? You’ve already got a job.”

  Well, hell, that was true. He’d never get it. No worries. He grinned, and Jesse kissed him. It was fast but impressive. Just what he needed. “Thank you, Jesse. For everything.”

  “I’ll be right here. Go get ’em, Tiger.”

  “Don’t you have class today?”

  “No, some teacher’s workshop, and I’m not quite a teacher yet.”

  Craig got out of the car. Jesse leaned out the window and waved. Craig walked across the lot and into the big, bright lobby. It managed to be both modern and casual, a perfect combination for a tech company. A young woman behind the reception desk smiled.

  “Good morning. I’m Craig Elson. I’m here—”

  “Oh yes, Mr. Elson. Alex is expecting you.” She pushed a pad of sticky ID badges toward him. “Please fill this out for me and have a seat for a moment.”

  Alex? Interesting. High-tech informal. He slapped the badge on his lapel and picked a comfortable chair in a patch of sunlight. He already had a job, such as it was. Maybe this interview would be good practice. And no worries. He’d never get it.

  “Craig?” He looked up at a tall, nice-looking, short-haired woman wearing black slacks and a polo shirt. More high-tech casual.

  Was this the admin? He stood, and she walked across the space with her hand extended. “I’m Alex Herschel. Come on in.”

  Wow. She came to get him herself.

  She led the way through the double doors into the offices beyond and onto an elevator. “Thank you for making this special effort to get here today. I’m on my way to Japan tonight, and I really wanted to meet you.”

  “I’m delighted.” His heart might escape his chest.

  They stepped off onto an efficient but cheery executive floor. Nothing ostentatious. Just attractive and practical. Kind of like her.

  “Would you like coffee?”

  “No thanks. But water would be great.”

  She paused at a young woman’s desk. “Anne, could you get us a couple of waters when you have a minute?”

  “Sure, Alex. No problem.” She smiled at Craig.

  Alex led the way into a pleasant office with a view across the Irvine trees and parking lots. She indicated a guest chair, and he sat across from her. She leaned forward and smiled. Probably about forty, with a face you’d call handsome rather than pretty. No makeup but a little lipstick, and the smile was great. “So you’re Lydia’s secret weapon.”

  Whoa. “I, uh, don’t know about that. But I work for her.”

  “Yeah. And from this résumé”—she tapped the pages in front of her—“you’re the one with the skills I keep wishing I had. Why are you leaving?”

  Deep breath. “To be honest, I’m not sure I’m going to leave.” He swallowed. “But a prophet is without honor in his own city. I’ve been there a long time, and I don’t think they see who I am now. But mostly, I really like ClearWater and couldn’t resist replying when the executive search came across my desk.” There. That was the truth.

  The admin came in with the water, and Alex thanked her and put a glass in front of him. She leaned back in her chair. “So why do you like ClearWater?”

  Breathe. “I think you have a lot of opportunity.” He sipped his water.

  “Opportunity we’re not taking advantage of?” Her face was neutral.

  He swallowed. Jesse’s blue eyes gazed at him. They’d be lucky to get you. Might as well tell the truth. “Actually, I think you’re spread too thin. You’re investing too much in biomed and you’ll never take that market. You need to concentrate where you can dominate.”

  She stared at him. “Well, hot damn. That’s about the most succinct evaluation of exactly what ClearWater is doing wrong I’ve ever heard. Plus a damned good synopsis of what we ought to change. How did you figure this out?”

  He shrugged. “Just observation. We have to keep a close eye on you since we overlap in a few markets.”

  “Did you notice the salary offered with the VP position?”

  He smiled. “Uh, yes.”

  “Is it agreeable?”

  “It’s more than I make now.”

  “Enough more?”

  “Enough for what?”

  “To get you to take this job?”

  Holy shit. “Are you offering me the job?” No, this couldn’t be happening.

  She crossed her arms on the desk. “I decided if I liked you when you came in, I was going to make you an offer. You haven’t done anything to change my mind. Quite the contrary. How about I sweeten the deal with a small signing bonus?”

  Holy double shit. “Uh, I’m interested in seeing the offer.”

  She tapped the desk again. “I’ll send it to the headhunter this afternoon. I’d like to take you on a whole tour and try to persuade you to join us, but I have a meeting in fifteen minutes. Besides, I think you already know everything there is about us. I like that.” She laughed.

  The words tumbled out before he could grab them. “I should probably mention that I’m gay. Company culture and all.”

  She grinned. “Well, that’s interesting.” She stood up, and he stood opposite her. She extended her hand. “So am I.”

  His heart beat too hard all the way to the elevator. She paused there. “Seriously, Craig. I know this seems precipitous, but I’ve interviewed a lot of people. I recognized your skills in your résumé, and I’ve seen what you’ve done for my competitor. I’ll be back from Japan in a week, and I’d love for you to come on board then.”

  He tried to make his swallow look natural. “I’m honored. This has been sudden for me.” He couldn’t breathe.

  “If you decide to accept the offer, as I hope you will, contact my assistant, Mary Arnold. I’ll include her contact information in the offer. She’ll let me know, and if you say yes, I’ll be dancing in the Ginza.”

  He smiled, they shook hands again, and he got on the elevator. The doors closed on her smiling face.

  Man, he liked her. Maybe he could even do the job. He leaned against the elevator walls. He couldn’t wait to tell Jesse.

  Jesse.

  Jesse said when he got a new job, he’d graduate. The end of the tutoring. No. The end of Jesse. He felt punched in the stomach.

  The elevator opened, and he stepped off. He couldn’t go out there yet. The door across the hall said Men, and he flew through it and into a stall. He sat on the toilet seat. Damn. This whole thing had just been a weird flyer. He didn’t need this job. Maybe he didn’t even want it. If he went back to work like normal, Jesse would keep trying. Oh, that would be so good. He dropped his head. But he’d be lying. Jesse said he never lied. How could Craig lie to him?

  Well, shit.

  With a long breath, he got up and walked slowly out of the men’s room. He couldn’t lie to Jesse. He loved him too much.

  He mustered a smile for the receptionist as he turned in the paper badge and pushed out the front door of ClearWater. What in the hell was he
going to do now?

  Bright Jesse eyes peered at him from the car. His face must look disappointed, because Jesse’s expression went from expectant to resigned in one second. Craig opened the car door and sat in the driver’s seat. Jesse wrapped an arm around his shoulders. “Hey, baby, it was good practice, right?”

  “Yeah. She said she’d let the headhunter know.” A pulse throbbed in his throat.

  “What was she like?”

  Craig shrugged. “It was a short meeting. She had another appointment in fifteen minutes. But I liked her. Seemed bright and capable.” Jeez, he was lying by omission, but he couldn’t seem to stop. He had to stop.

  “Funny that she would have been so anxious for you to come in when she only had fifteen minutes.”

  Craig shrugged again. Shit, Elson, just tell him.

  “No worries. How about we go see your mom?”

  “Now?”

  “Sure. You promised I could meet her.”

  Oh damn, if Jesse met his mother, Craig would just get in deeper. But it might give him a minute to think. He nodded.

  Craig turned on music, and they both listened quietly on the drive over to the Laguna Hills nursing home. He could feel Jesse’s eyes on him. He didn’t know what to do. He’d be really excited about this job if it didn’t mean losing Jesse. But if he could have Jesse with him a little longer, it would almost be worth staying where he was. Jesse would hate that idea. Hell.

  He parked, and Jesse fell in beside him as they walked into the low-rise building. The woman at the desk, Elise, looked up, and Craig waved. They all knew him and why he was there. He glanced at Jesse. The place always had a slightly funny smell, and healthy people often recoiled from it. Jesse seemed as at home here as he did everywhere. He smiled at the people around him—wheelchairs, feeding tubes, and all.

  In the Alzheimer’s wing, Craig walked over to the desk and signed in. The big nurse looked at Jesse with interest. Craig never brought anyone with him. He could feel himself blushing. “Estelle, this is my friend Jesse. He wants to meet Mom.”