Another Man's Child
Page 10
Her heart was bumping when she was dragged up by Doris to do her turn. There was silence as she stood there, thinking and getting her nerve up. But after a shaky start she did a rather good impersonation of Nelly Powers singing ‘The Boy in the Gallery’, encouraging everyone to join in the chorus. When she finished they clapped and cheered and Molly found herself curtseying and blowing kisses, enjoying herself no end.
Several of the children got up and danced, to be joined by a young man who did a clog dance. To her surprise Molly recognised Rob Fletcher and as soon as he’d finished she went over to him. ‘I didn’t expect to see you here. How’s your dad?’
‘The same as always. I’m walking out with Marie, Doris’s sister.’ He wiped sweat from his eyes with the back of one hand. ‘Some’s been asking after thee, by the way.’
‘Me?’
‘Yeah, you!’ He grinned. ‘I can’t tell thee who he is, though. Dad said but I’ve forgot.’
‘Can’t be important if you’ve forgot.’ She poked him in the ribs and soon forgot about it. Until she was on her way home. Then she wondered whether the man was her stepfather. But what could he want with her?
‘Moll, wake up! Lady Muck wants to see yer right away,’ said Doris loudly in her ear.
Molly groaned and tried to force her eyes open. She could hear Jessica crying and managed to crawl out of bed. ‘It’ll be those damn’ curtains, I bet. She must have crept in while I was asleep and noticed I haven’t done them. Well, she’ll have to wait. I need to feed Jess first.’
‘Lady Muck made her a bottle and gave it to me to give to her.’ Doris looked uncomfortable.
Molly did her best to conceal her apprehension. ‘She won’t take it. Where is the woman?’
‘Sitting room. Yer’d best go. I’ll see to the baby. It won’t be the first bottle I’ve given.’
Molly hesitated, then nodded. Best get it over with. She went into the adjoining room and splashed cold water on her face.
Mrs Collins was standing by the window looking out over the garden when she entered the sitting room. ‘You wanted me,’ said Molly.
The older woman turned and there was a gleam of triumph in her eyes. ‘A man called. I told him he shouldn’t have come to the front door but he left this message for you.’ She waved a cigarette packet at her.
A man? What man? thought Molly, reluctantly taking the battered packet from her and flattening it out. She read: Dear Moll, this is going to come as a shock to you but I’m not dead. The world seemed to tilt sideways and she felt herself in danger of falling off. She took a deep breath to steady herself and read on. I’ll wait at the gate post. Your loving husband, Frank.
Oh, Lord, it couldn’t be true!
‘Well?’ said Mrs Collins. ‘Who is he? He’s not the first boy thee’s had, is he? Thee always were one for the fellas. Jack, he liked thee, but thee weren’t satisfied with him… you stole our cousin?’
‘What are you talking about?’ cried Molly, crushing the cigarette packet between her fingers. ‘You know who he is. You’ve read this!’ She threw the packet at Mrs Collins.
‘He says he’s thy husband. Thee’ll have to go with him.’
Molly’s mouth had gone dry and she was trembling. Her mind was in turmoil and her heart beating fit to burst. ‘My husband’s dead! This is a trick of yours. I have the baby to see to. I have to go.’
She turned but Mrs Collins’s voice stopped her in her tracks. ‘I’ll look after the baby. I’m good with babies, whatever they say.’
Molly looked at her and saw she was smiling. At least her mouth was smiling but her eyes appeared to be fixed on something in the distance and were unfathomable. ‘No, I can’t leave her,’ croaked Molly. ‘I can’t!’
‘Thee has to. Thee’s another husband now. I’ll manage. I told them I was good with babies.’
‘She’ll scream the place down,’ said Molly, feeling desperate. ‘I’ll take her for an airing.’
‘No. Thee must go and not come back, Mabel.’
Molly stared at her and suddenly understood. ‘You’re jealous of me because I remind you of my mother,’ she gasped.
‘No.’ Mrs Collins shook her head. ‘Thy mother’s dead. Why should I be jealous of her?’ She hunched her shoulders and said petulantly, ‘And why should I be jealous of thee? Go! Thy husband’s waiting.’
Molly hesitated, unsure whether to rush upstairs or see if Frank really was outside. She couldn’t think straight. How she wished Nathan or Mr Barnes was here.
‘Go on!’ Mrs Collins pushed her in the direction of the door, almost sending her flying.
Molly made a decision. She had to see if Frank really was there.
She saw her husband at the same moment as he caught sight of her. It was the most peculiar feeling. He couldn’t be a ghost. She thought she was going to faint. He was a stranger., yet not a stranger as he came striding towards her. ‘What the hell were you playing at, Moll? You’ve had me bloody worried.’
‘Have I? You’re the one supposed to be dead.’ She gazed up at him in a daze. He was just as handsome as ever, brown eyes full of life.
He seized her by the shoulders and she reached up and ran one hand over the sleeve of his coat, feeling the firm muscles beneath. ‘You are real,’ she whispered, and her knees buckled.
Frank’s arms went round her, stopping her from falling. He laughed, teeth appearing white against his ruddy skin. ‘Well, I’m not a damn’ ghost, you daft girl!’
She cleared her throat and managed to find her voice. ‘What happened? Where have you been all these months? I cried and cried. I thought my heart would break.’
‘I’m sorry, Moll. Give us a kiss.’
She gave him a tentative peck.
‘What d’you call that?’ He squashed her against him and crushed her mouth with his. She was suddenly frightened, not ready for this. She cut the kiss short. ‘Not here, Frank,’ she whispered.
‘What the hell d’you mean, not here? You’re my wife. I’ll kiss you where I want. It’s been months. I thought you’d be glad to see me?’
‘Of course I’m glad to see you! But here’s not the place.’
‘You would have said what the hell once and kissed me anywhere.’
‘Would I?’ She wasn’t so sure about that. ‘Anyway I don’t want to give the people round here a peepshow.’ She squeezed his arm. ‘Let’s go somewhere quieter. We need to talk.’ She pulled on his arm, tugging him in the direction of the sea, frantically trying to sort out her thoughts. ‘Were you the man who asked Jack Fletcher my whereabouts?’
‘Not me. A private detective. I arrived home to find you missing and Ma had no idea where you were. I tell you, girl, that was one in the eye for me. What were you thinking of, going off the way you did?’
‘Does it matter right now? How did he know to speak to Jack Fletcher?’
‘I remembered your Nanna but couldn’t remember where she lived. So I went to your stepfather, didn’t I? But for the life of him he couldn’t remember either. I think he’s going senile. Anyhow, I’d got meself another ship. Needed to get back into the routine of things and make some money. I just happened to see this advert in the Echo about a detective, so I set him to find you while I was at sea.’
‘I remember that advert,’ she said slowly. ‘How long ago was this?’
‘Three weeks.’
‘Only three weeks!’ She couldn’t believe it. ‘Where have you been all this time?’
‘Don’t get shirty with me, Moll.’ He scowled. ‘You’ve been missing, too, remember, girl. I was dead lucky. I’ve always been a strong swimmer. Thrown in the canal as a nipper, had to sink or swim. Anyhow I managed to find a bit of wreckage and hang on to it. I was picked up by this father and son fishing from Ocean City in Maryland.’
They had reached the sand dunes and he dragged her up the nearest one, their feet sinking in the soft sand as they balanced on the top. ‘If you were found that quickly, why didn’t we hear sooner?’
He s
queezed her hand. ‘I was done in, wasn’t I? Must have banged my head at some time. I couldn’t remember things properly. When I started remembering bits of things, like the name of the ship I’d been on and where I’d come from, it was months later. When I finally got home, you’d flown the coop.’
She felt terrible, really sick, thinking of Nathan and their making love, of Jessica, and all that she had been through believing him dead. ‘I wish I’d known – and I’m sorry, Frank, for not being there when you came home. But I couldn’t have stood it with your mother. But you’re here now. I take it Nanna’s neighbour, Mrs Smith, gave the detective Jack Fletcher’s name?’
‘The bargee? Yeah. And he gave him this Nathan Collins’s name. So here I am.’ Frank smiled.
But Molly wasn’t smiling. She’d committed adultery, and how was Nathan going to feel when he returned from Wales and discovered her husband was alive? Whatever there was between them it had to be over now.
‘What are you thinking? What’s wrong?’ Frank smoothed back her hair. ‘I know this must all be a shock to you.’
‘I wish you could have found me earlier,’ she said miserably.
‘Bloody hell, girl! Don’t you think I do too?’ He cupped her face between his hands and kissed her several times and she responded automatically. ‘You should have let Ma look after you and then you might not have lost the baby,’ he said against her lips.
Darling Jessica! It was as if a dagger had been thrust into her heart. What was she going to do? How could she explain?
‘It was a lousy thing to happen,’ continued Frank. ‘But at least we can have another now I’m back. I wanted a boy anyhow.’
She tried to speak, to say how wonderful little girls were, but couldn’t get the words out.
‘There now,’ he said, hugging her close. ‘I can see how upset you are. But you’re not to worry, luv. If you’d been brought up with sisters like me, you’d want a boy, too. Girls can be a pain in the backside.’ He was smiling and she could have hit him.
At last Molly found her voice. ‘I can believe that of your sisters, Frank. But our little daughter, she’s—’
‘Dead! I know, and it’s sad, Moll. I’m not blaming you,’ he said impatiently. ‘As I said, we can start all over again. Ma says—’
‘I don’t want to know what Ma says.’ Molly felt a familiar resentment.
‘I won’t tell you then. But it surprises me that someone as nice and easygoing as you are is so stubborn when it comes to doing what Ma says. She’s more experience of life. You should have listened to her and not run off like that. She only wanted to help.’
‘Did she tell you she locked me in a bedroom and was planning to keep me prisoner?’ said Molly, tight-lipped. ‘She wanted to take possession of our baby, body and soul.’
Frank’s mouth set. ‘Don’t be melodramatic! She shouldn’t have locked you up but she was worried about you.’
‘Lovely way of showing it.’
They were both silent. Molly was aware of the waves lapping against the shore and the sound of children playing. Oh, Lord, what was she going to do? How could she tell him what she had done? He’d never understand how desperate she’d felt. How, right now, she was anxious and sad, exasperated and confused.
‘Anyway, there’ll be other babies, Moll.’ He ran one hand slowly down her body. It came to rest on her bottom.
‘Don’t do that!’ she whispered, darting glances all around. ‘What’ll people think?’
His eyes hardened and he pulled her against him. ‘I keep telling you – you’re me wife. I don’t care. I’m making the decisions, Moll. We’re going to have to live with Ma for a while, whatever you say.’
That did it. Her pent-up emotions exploded. ‘I can’t believe you, Frank Payne! What have I just been saying? I will not live with your mother. We’d drive each other mad.’ She wrenched herself free and began to run.
He jumped after her, quickly catching up. ‘What’s the matter with you?’ he said, with an air of helplessness that unexpectedly tugged at her heart strings. ‘I thought with me being back from the dead you’d do anything for me.’
She felt a similar helplessness. ‘I’m really glad you’re alive, Frank, but it’s a shock. I need time to get used to it. I’ve built a whole new life for myself now. I’ve had to.’ She placed one hand gingerly on his arm. ‘Let’s take things slowly. Not rush into anything.’ His expression froze.
‘And what’s that supposed to mean? You can’t stay here.’
‘Why not?’ She laughed. ‘You’ll be going back to sea soon. What difference does it make to you where I live while you’re away?’
‘I can’t believe this!’ He looked like thunder as he kicked up a pile of sand. ‘Where am I supposed to sleep when I come home? In the nursery with you and this Mr Collins’s child?’ He flung the words at her. ‘Get this, girl. I don’t want my wife in service. I may not have much money at the moment but I’ll get some.’ He seized hold of her wrist. ‘Come on, we’re going.’
‘No!’
He stared at her. ‘Have you forgotten you’re married to me?’ His voice was heated.
‘I won’t live with Ma. I’ve got money. We can find somewhere else to live while you’re home.’
He took a deep breath. ‘I don’t want your money. For now you’ll have to make do at Ma’s.’ He headed for the road, dragging her behind him.
‘No, no, no! Frank, wait!’ She tried to free her wrist but he was too strong. Molly sought another way to get round him. ‘If we go and live with Ma she’ll be listening for every squeak of the bed!’ she rattled on, tripping over the kerb. ‘I’ll never be able to let myself go at your mother’s. And think of living with your sisters.’
‘It won’t be forever.’
‘Frank, sweetheart, listen to me,’ she said, determined to have her way and struck by what she thought was a brilliant idea. ‘If you’ll take the money I’ve saved we can find somewhere else. Doris the maid lives by Athol Street near Scottie Road. There’s a refreshment house there and I’m sure they let out furnished rooms. We could stay there.’
‘Why the hell should we? And if you’re talking about a seamen’s lodging house, it’s not a fit place for you.’
‘I’m not. It’s nothing fancy but I can find somewhere else once you’re back at sea. This is just a temporary measure. We need to be on our own, Frank.’ Her voice was gently persuasive as he stopped and looked at her. She ran one hand down his chest and brought it to rest on the top button of his trousers. ‘We could go there tonight. The Rotunda Theatre’s only walking distance. We could see a show, have a fish supper and then go home together. I could get the money right now. You just have to mention Jack Fletcher’s name. Say you’re an old friend of his and I’m sure they’ll give us a room.’
‘I don’t know the man.’
‘But he knows me.’
Frank was silent, staring at her in a way that made her feel uncomfortable. ‘It was him who gave you the lift to Burscough.’
‘What’s wrong with that? Think of living with your sisters… we’ll be better on our own.’ Molly kissed him but he did not respond.
‘It’s all right to kiss me now, is it?’ His voice was cool. ‘Doesn’t matter if anyone’s looking now. Think you can twist me round your little finger just because you know I want you.’
‘I’m not so sure about that. You stayed away so long. Do you still love me?’
‘I’d be a liar if I said I didn’t – and you know how I hate liars.’
‘Then be patient with me, Frank. Do what I ask. Take the money I’ve saved and get us that room.’
He hesitated. ‘I’m not happy but I see you’re going to get in a state if I force you to go to Ma’s. Perhaps we do need to be alone. Get the money then we’ll go.’
She kissed him, this time in gratitude. His lips tasted salty and cool from the sea breeze. ‘Wait here. I won’t be long.’
Molly ran all the way up the drive and round to the back of the house,
thinking to pick up Jessica and explain to Frank once she had her. It was quiet and there was no sign of anyone. She avoided the kitchen and sped up the backstairs to the nursery, praying Jessica would be in her cradle. She had to have her daughter. Hopefully Frank would understand. But there was no sign of the baby. Molly found her savings and her hand hovered over the cache of gold sovereigns. She took two of them but hid the rest right at the back of a drawer. Then she frantically dashed downstairs to the kitchen, hoping to find Jessica with Doris.
‘Lady Muck’s taken her out,’ said her friend.
‘Why?’ Molly sank into a chair in despair.
Doris stared at her curiously. ‘What’s up? What did she want you for?’
‘She didn’t tell you?’
‘You’re joking! Tell the likes of me her business?’
‘My husband’s turned up.’
‘Holy Mary!’ Doris’s jaw dropped and she crossed herself. ‘What are yer going to do?’
‘What d’you expect me to do?’ Her voice trembled and she buried her head in her hands.
‘Oh, yer poor thing,’ said Doris, patting her back. ‘But it’s for the best, luv.’
‘What are you saying that for, you daft girl?’ said Cook, wagging a finger at her. ‘I know she’ll miss us all – especially Miss Jessica. But it’s like a miracle, her husband coming back from the dead.’
Molly lifted her head and stared at her from wild eyes. Leave Jessica! How could she leave her sweet, precious daughter? She would go to Frank now and explain and then come back for her. She rushed out of the kitchen, trying to work out what to say to her husband. Surely he would understand?
* * *
‘You seem to have been ages,’ complained Frank. ‘Where’s your things?’ He seized her hands. ‘Did that Mr Collins want you to stay?’
‘He’s not here. I’ve got to tell you something else, Frank,’ she panted. ‘Something important. But first, here’s the money.’ At the last minute she had hidden the two gold sovereigns in a pocket of her petticoat. ‘I’ve got to go back for my things. I’ve wages due and must see Mr Barnes. He’s Mr Collins’s uncle. I’ll follow on.’