Up in Flames

by Kira Sinclair

  These were her people, and she couldn’t discount how amazing it was going to be to raise her son or daughter alongside these men and women. She’d have been lying if she said she hadn’t felt a burst of fear the moment she found out she was pregnant. She had no idea how to do this. It was times like those that she missed her mother so much. That hole felt like it went straight through her soul. But she had great examples in the women around her. She and her baby would be okay.

  One of the twins tripped. Without even hesitating, Evan reached out and caught the back of her shirt before she could connect with the ground. As he swung her up into the air, the little girl’s laughter pealed through the noise. He dropped her down and blew a raspberry on her belly before saying, “Be careful, precious.”

  “I will, Unca Ev,” she promised with her little girl lisp as he set her back down. They weren’t actually related, but that didn’t matter. Evan had been a part of the child’s life from the moment she was born.

  Erik wandered over to Dev and Evan, easily slipping into their conversation. He’d only met them both during this trip, but they all seemed like old friends. Lola eyed him for several moments, but his body language clearly said he was relaxed.

  Gage and Blake joined them, and within a few minutes, Lola found herself surrounded by their wives and bombarded with questions.

  “How are you feeling?” Willow asked.

  “Colt told Dev that you’re cutting back your hours a bit for the next couple months. That’s smart.”

  “So, what the heck is going on between you and Erik? You both seem pretty comfortable with each other.” Tatum drawled.

  The natural noise of five women carrying on simultaneous conversations ground to a halt as every pair of eyes zeroed in on her, waiting for an answer to the last question, which she wasn’t prepared to give.

  “Um...nothing,” Lola said, though she was sure they could see through her and they weren’t going to let her get away with it.

  “He had his hand on the small of your back as you both walked up.” Hope pointed out.

  Lexi chimed in, “He opened your water.”

  “And according to the Sweetheart rumor mill, his truck has been outside your house several nights this week. All night.” Tatum’s eyebrows waggled suggestively.

  Lola couldn’t fight the blush that heated up her skin. Yeah, it wasn’t the first time she and Erik had been grist for that rumor mill but... She shifted uncomfortably in her seat.

  “Woo-hoo, someone’s getting laid!” Hope exclaimed.

  Exasperation finally surfaced, trumping the chagrin she shouldn’t have felt in the first place. She and Erik were both adults, dammit. “Don’t give me that, Hope Harper. You make it sound like I’m the only one in the entire city having sex. I know for a fact you all get laid on the regular.” She pointedly let her gaze sweep across the crop of kids surrounding them.

  Willow gave a soft, serene smile and then blew them all out of the water with, “I can’t speak for the rest of you, but Dev and I had to pull over on the way here.”

  Hope grumbled. “Darn kids old enough to ask questions. Enjoy the days of quickies while you can,” she said, pointing at Willow with a lemon square from Lexi’s bakery.

  “Oh, there was nothing quick about it,” Willow drawled, flashing a satisfied grin.

  “But we’re getting off track here,” Lexi said, pulling everyone’s attention back where Lola didn’t want it. “Seriously, we know that things with Erik are complicated, and we’re just worried about you. What’s going on?”

  Lola’s gaze traveled over to the knot of guys. She couldn’t keep her gaze from trailing down Erik’s body, taking in the curve of his tight ass and the broad expanse of his shoulders along the way. Lust, strong and insistent, rolled through her, leaving a pleasant buzz deep in her blood.

  “Oh, yeah, she’s lost.”

  Shaking her head, Lola forced herself to look back at her friends. “I don’t know. Really. The attraction and chemistry have always been there, and we just decided to stop fighting it.”

  “That’s good.” Lexi nodded.

  “No, that’s bad,” she countered. “Because he’s leaving in a few days. We’re just...” Lola looked up at the stars, fighting the sting at the back of her eyes. “...playing house for the moment. I can’t count on him. I learned that lesson the hard way once already.”

  There. She’d said it out loud. Voiced her biggest fear and her truest reality.

  “Oh, sweetheart,” Hope murmured. “Maybe that’s not how it will go down. Is there any way he might decide to stay?”

  Lola wasn’t going there. Couldn’t allow herself to wish for something that wasn’t on the table. Shaking her head vigorously, she said, “No.”

  Because it wasn’t happening.

  Wrapping her arms around her, Hope pulled her into a rough hug. “I’m so sorry. You know we’re here for you, anytime, any way.”

  Yeah, she did know that. “I’ll deal when I need to. Until then, I’m going to enjoy whatever this is because I know the next few months—and years—are going to be hectic.”

  Hope squeezed her shoulders. “You’re not wrong, but it’ll be totally worth it.”

  The conversation turned to other things—life, kids, jobs and businesses. Lola stayed a part of the chatter, but on the outskirts as she let the comfort of it all wash over her. Somewhere in the middle of a musical number with a snowman, Lola looked back over to the guys and had to do a double take to make sure she was seeing correctly.

  Erik held Bradley, Dev and Willow’s four-month-old son. Erik cradled him against his chest, his hand moving rhythmically across the child’s back. He rocked on the balls of his feet, back and forth, even as he continued whatever conversation he was a part of.

  Willow leaned over to Lola. “He looks good holding Brad.”

  Yeah, he did. Lola had always known he’d be a good dad, if for no other reason than that he was determined not to make the mistakes his own father had. But seeing him like this...he seemed so comfortable and capable.

  When had that happened?

  Lola was up out of her chair before she could process her intentions. Crossing the space, she slipped behind Erik, letting her hand trail across his hip even as she peered around his shoulder.

  Looking down at her, he smiled. “Shh, he’s back asleep.”

  An angelic little face, scrunched in sleep, greeted her. Brad was one of the cutest babies she’d ever seen.

  “How’d you learn to do that?” she asked, her voice low so as not to wake him.

  “Put a baby to sleep? One of my friends back home has triplets. When they were born a year ago, it was all hands on deck, including mine. I really wasn’t interested in learning how to diaper and bottle-feed. My plan had been to contribute by buying wipes and meals and shit. But the first night I showed up after shift, Wes greeted me at the door with a squalling bundle in each arm and this save me expression on his face.” Erik shrugged.

  “So you stepped up.”

  A stain of color spread up his neck and across his cheeks. That was almost as endearing as the story he’d just told her. “I guess.”

  “Boys or girls?”

  “Two boys and a girl. All a handful, although she’s the worst. Already knows how to flash those big, bright eyes and get what she wants out of everyone around her, even me.”

  Lola had to laugh at the mental image of some cherubic toddler wrapping a big, bad firefighter around her little finger. “Do you want a boy or a girl?”

  Lola hadn’t meant to ask the question. It just popped out. She wasn’t even sure that she knew what she wanted yet.

  Erik’s expression was bright and fathomless as he craned his neck to look at her. “I’ve always wanted a little girl, with your gorgeous chocolate eyes, warm skin and larger-than-life laugh. One
with the same spark of attitude, even though I know it’ll drive us both crazy while she’s young. Totally worth it if she grows into half the woman her mother is.”

  Aww, hell. Twisting, Lola pressed her face against Erik’s arm and drew in a deep, steadying breath.

  She was in trouble. So much trouble. She could feel her heart trembling with joy and fear. She wanted so much to believe they could find their way back to what they’d had before. But putting her faith in that...

  She wasn’t ready to take that risk. Not again. It had left her spinning for months. Years. If she was honest, she’d still been spinning when Erik showed up here all those weeks ago. She’d been unable to give any other man a chance because none of them measured up to him. Even with all his flaws, even after walking away from her and her brother when they needed him most.

  Erik was dangerous and she was in over her head.

  * * *

  THE EVENING HAD been great. He really liked Lola’s friends. He’d known a few of them, but since he was a couple of years older, they’d never been close. She’d gathered a great group of people around her, and that made him happy.

  He liked knowing there were people who had her back when and if she needed it. She had that in her family, too, but friends were different and just as important. Sometimes more so, since they usually were right alongside you for the fun and trouble.

  He loved watching her laugh. There was something about the sparkle in her eyes that just made his entire chest tight and open at the same time.

  At one point, she’d crawled onto the ground to play with the twins. She was a natural with the kids, but that didn’t surprise him.

  What did was the way she’d leaned against him, wrapping her arms around his knee and placing her head in his lap. It was a comfortable gesture, one neither of them would have thought twice about six years ago.

  Tonight, it was a symbol that he took to heart. Weaving his fingers through her thick hair, Erik massaged her scalp down into the long column of her neck.

  “Mmm,” she murmured, arching into his touch like a cat.

  The movie played on the screen across the park, but none of them seemed to be paying it any attention. Slowly the kids lost the fight with sleep, and before long they were all out. The twins were adorable, arms wrapped around each other, foreheads pressed together, like they’d nodded off midconversation.

  The adults drifted together in pairs. Hope climbed into Gage’s lap, curling up and resting her head on his shoulder. Dev, lying on the blanket he’d spread out, wrapped a hand around Willow’s calf and urged her down beside him, tucking her body into the curve of his own. Evan plopped his butt onto the grass in front of Tatum’s chair and wiggled backward until she opened her legs and let him lean against her, threading her fingers through his hair. Lexi and Blake sat side by side, but their heads were leaned together as they murmured softly to each other.

  Erik’s chest seized with jealousy at the sight of all these couples surrounding them.

  This was what had been missing in his life. He’d watched the same thing with the guys he worked beside, never admitting it bothered him to be the single guy among the couples when they held family barbecues or invited him over to watch a game. Their wives and girlfriends had tried to set him up with friends, coworkers and—in one really bad blind date experience—a dog groomer.

  None of the women had worked out because none of them had been Lola. Without meaning to, he’d compared each and every one of them to her. None had her exuberance or confidence. Her soft hair or warm eyes. Her ability to call him on his bullshit because she’d known him forever.

  Resting her head on his thigh, Lola rolled so that she could look up at him. Light from the screen flickered across her face, and in that moment she’d never looked more beautiful. She hadn’t bothered with makeup or fancy clothes. Her toes, tipped with red polish, wiggled in the grass, her feet bare because she’d tossed her flip-flops underneath his chair.

  She was perfectly Lola and he loved her.

  It was that simple. He always had and he always would.

  “Take me home?” she asked, staring up at him through sleepy, sultry eyes. It was a strange combination that stirred in him a need to kiss the hell out of her and scoop her up into his arms to protect her at the same time.

  “Anytime, gorgeous,” he murmured.

  Quietly they gathered their things and whispered farewells to everyone.

  He grasped her hand and pulled her close as they weaved their way through the scattered people back to his truck. The drive to her place was quiet and cozy. He kept hold of her, stroking his thumb across the back of her hand because he needed to touch her.

  Lola started to unpack everything from the back of his truck, but grasping her gently by the waist, Erik pulled her away. “Leave it. It’ll be here in the morning.”

  “But...” Lola turned slightly, ready to protest, but as she got a good look at him, something hot flared in her eyes. “Okay,” she said, twisting fully into him.

  Her hands landed on his chest and her face turned up to his, expectant, waiting. He wondered if she could feel the erratic beat of his heart beneath her palms.

  Laying his own over hers, Erik kept her right there as she backed slowly up the walk to her front door. He had to release her to unlock it and let them in, but the minute they were inside, Erik pressed her against the wall.

  She sucked in a sharp breath but never took her gaze off him. He wanted to devour her. Instead, he leaned down and settled a soft kiss against her lush lips. The vibration of her moan was his reward.

  He teased and savored, gradually deepening the kiss until her sighs and his low groans melded together. Her fingers found him, skimming up and down his body in an unhurried need to explore.

  This slow exploration was what he wanted tonight. They’d been blinded by passion for days, but this felt like a reawakening, a thorough rediscovery and building of so much more. Something had changed tonight—with him or with her, Erik wasn’t certain. But right now, they had no need to hurry. He wanted to learn every nuance of her. He wanted to remember.

  Slowly she bunched the hem of his shirt in her hands and dragged it over his head. Dipping close, she let her mouth trail lazily across his skin, laving and worshipping in a way that drove him insane even as it freed something deep inside him.

  “You’re unbelievable, Erik. So perfect and strong. You constantly amaze me.” She peppered his body with kisses and words of praise that soothed wounds he hadn’t even realized still reverberated with pain and remorse.

  Wrapping her hair through his fingers, he used his hold to pull her head back so he could look into her eyes. “No, you’re the amazing one. Lola, you’re fearless and always have been.”

  A shaky laugh burst through her parted lips. “Hardly. I’m scared every single day. I’m scared right now. But that doesn’t matter anymore.”

  He wanted to ask her what she was scared of but didn’t want to lose the moment. And wasn’t sure he was ready to hear the answer.

  Shaking her head, she said, “Maybe we should move this mutual admiration society to the bedroom.”

  A burst of laughter shot through him. “Whatever the lady wants.”

  Lola grinned and wrapped her arms around his neck when he swung her up into the air. “Erik,” she said in a breathless voice, but he wasn’t sure if the single word was an admonishment or delight. He wasn’t sure Lola knew, either.

  Crawling across the bed, he deposited her into the center, pushing off the mound of pillows she insisted on using.

  Knees bent, feet flat on the bed and propped up onto her elbows, Lola watched him shrug out of his clothes. The heat from her gaze set his body on fire, a roiling need that he wasn’t sure could ever be extinguished. Did he really want it to be?

  Never.

  Reaching for her an
kle, Erik slowly trailed his fingers up the soft line of her legs, dipping just beneath the hem of her shorts. A hiss slipped between her teeth even as she arched into his caress, silently asking for more.

  Taking her clothes off was like unwrapping the best Christmas present, the one he’d spent years asking for. Only he got to do it again and again, filled with that giddy excitement each time.

  He flicked the button on her waistband, tugged at her zipper and then pulled her shorts and panties down her legs. He followed the trail back up with his mouth, enjoying her soft sighs of pleasure. But he didn’t touch the close-cropped mound of curls at the top, not even when her hips pulsed up in silent demand.

  Instead, he moved his attention to her loose, flowing shirt, not bothering to open the row of tiny white buttons, just pulling it off. Urging her shoulders up off the bed, Erik pressed his palm to the middle of her back to support her even as he flicked open the clasp of her bra. He flattened his palm just below the band, spreading his fingers to keep the cups in place.

  Latching his mouth onto the sensitive curve of her neck, Erik licked and sucked his way across her collarbone until he reached the strap settled against her shoulder. With his lips, he nudged it down, following it with nipping kisses and his trailing tongue. He stopped to suck on the inside of her elbow and again at her wrist, enjoying the way her pulse fluttered beneath his mouth.

  He paid the same attention to the other side, finally lifting his hand and letting her bra fall away. “Erik, you’re killing me,” she whispered.

  “No, love, I promise I’m not.”

  He, on the other hand, might die from sheer loss of blood to his brain. Erik was pretty sure every drop in his body had gone south to his pounding erection.

  When she was finally naked, Erik pushed back onto his heels. Kneeling between her open thighs, he had the perfect view of Lola, spread out like a banquet before him. He wanted to taste every inch of her. Know every part of her.