Keeping Him

by Kennedy Fox

  “Okay,” I give in. “But you’ll only be encouraging your own blue balls.”

  “Fuuuuuuck.” He groans, tilting his head back. “Okay, so there’ll need to be some rules.”

  “This is sounding less appealing by the minute,” I quip, laughing when he gives me a death stare.

  “No being a cock tease,” he says, arching a brow at me. “You can’t be a temptress and then stroke my dick and walk away. No playing dirty.”

  “Then you can’t be touching my ass, looking at my tits, or making inappropriate comments about my body.”

  “That’s been a part of our conversations since we were teens.” He bursts out laughing when I give him an unimpressed expression. My lips in a firm line, not amused by him not taking this seriously. “Alright, alright. No teasing and tempting each other until we agree it’s time.”

  “Thank you.” I smile, victoriously. “Look at us; already making compromises like a real-life couple.”

  “Yeah, well, you’ve always been the one person I can’t argue with or deny. No taking advantage, though.” He winks, and I mold to his sturdy frame again, kissing his eager lips.

  His hands cup my cheeks, holding us in place. I fist the shirt under his vest and pull him closer until it feels like I could climb inside him. Soon, his hands are sliding down my backside, and when he grips my ass cheeks, he hauls me up until my legs wrap around his waist and my arms around his neck.

  His mouth against mine is desperate and heated as his tongue slides in and out with mine. I’ve waited years for this, and there’s no way I’ll ever be able to stop now. His movements are so calculated, and the way his lips move effortlessly over mine makes my entire body shiver with eagerness. It makes me second-guess this whole waiting thing and wanting to succumb to him right now.

  Jackson walks us to the back of Evan’s truck, and pulls the latch one-handed, so the gate falls down in one smooth motion. I chuckle against his lips as I cling tighter to his body, so he doesn’t drop me. He turns and sits down, positioning me to straddle his lap.

  My dress ruffles around my knees and hangs down Jackson’s legs. He tightens his grip on my ass and pulls me roughly against him, showing me exactly how aroused he is right now.

  “Jackson…” I murmur against his lips. “You aren’t playing fair.”

  “I know, baby. Never said I was a saint, and I live to break the rules.” He moves his lips down my jaw and neck.

  I laugh against him and press my palms to his chest, putting distance between us. “Then I better get off your lap.”

  Jackson helps set me down, and before I can suggest something else, he’s walking away toward our secret spot. Moments later, he returns with a blanket, and I watch as he fans it out on the back of the truck. Luckily, Evan has a smooth surface, so lying down won’t be painful. Jackson helps me back up, and soon we’re lying down with his arm around me and our bodies molded together.

  We lie in silence for a while, enjoying these stolen moments before reality has a chance to pull us apart again. Looking up at the sky, I think back to all the times we spent out here as kids.

  “Do you remember when we were like thirteen or so, and we snuck out here at like two in the morning, and there was that raccoon…”

  “Ricky!” Jackson blurts out. “Ricky the raccoon…that bastard. Nearly bit me a dozen times.”

  We’re both laughing, remembering the incident. He visited us so much, he eventually got a name.

  “I think he thought this was his spot,” I say. “He chased after us so many times, I lost count.”

  “Pretty sure Dad shot him that summer.”

  “Oh my God!” I squeal. “Why would he shoot a poor, innocent raccoon?”

  Jackson grunts in response, knowing damn well Ricky wasn’t innocent. “Kept getting into the trash and Dad had enough of it being scattered all over the yard. Grabbed his shotgun and—”

  “Okay, I get the picture,” I cut him off. “Poor Ricky. Rest in peace.”

  Jackson snorts, rolling over to face me. There’s a smile plastered on his face—one I haven’t seen on him in years—so genuine and happy. “That’s one of the reasons I fell in love with you. You were always so compassionate about everything. Animals and people. Also why I wanted to impress you with my awesome riding skills.” He lifts the corner of his lips and smirks. “Turns out I was smitten by you before I even knew what those feelings meant.”

  “Who knew it’d take almost two decades for you to figure it out?” I tease, getting a laugh out of him.

  He leans in slowly, cupping my cheek, and when he brings our lips together, he kisses me with such tenderness, I melt against him. “Thank you,” he whispers against my lips.

  I open my eyes and stare at him. “For what?”

  “For giving me a chance to prove to you I can be the guy you deserve.”

  Jackson and I lie in the back of the truck for the next few hours, watching the clouds while reminiscing about all the stupid things we did as kids. Eventually, I get the courage to head back to my parents’ and face everyone.

  “I think I should go back, so they don’t get overly worried,” I say, leaning up on my elbows and glancing down at my wedding gown. It’s such a gorgeous dress too.

  Jackson sits up, pushing his messy hair out of his face. I’ve always secretly loved when he does that. He has amazing messy hair.

  “Do you want me to go with you? I can drive you back in Evan’s truck, and I’ll grab mine later,” Jackson offers.

  I give him a sad look, wishing I could have him by my side for support, but I know I need to do this alone. “No, I have to do this on my own. Apologize to my family and explain why I couldn’t go through with it. I’m sure Trent is waiting to hear from me, too. If you’re with me, they’re going to think it’s your fault, and I don’t want anyone blaming you. They need to know this was my decision because Trent just wasn’t the right one.”

  “I’m sorry…” he whispers. “I know this isn’t going to be easy for you. I wish I could be there to hold your hand and give you the comfort and support to get through it.” He kisses my knuckles again, and I already love this new side to Jackson that I know has only ever been for me.

  “I’m sure people are going to assume, but I’d rather the whole town not form their own opinions based on us driving back together. So I’ll tell them I was having second thoughts and didn’t go with my gut, but when it came down to it, I just couldn’t marry him. And that’s the truth.”

  “You were having second thoughts?” he asks, furrowing his brows. “And you were going to marry him anyway?”

  “You’re seriously not going to judge me right now, are you?” I pin him with a glare.

  “No, I’m just askin’.”

  “There were some signs I ignored, and then when the truth came out, I forgave him too easily. I can explain it to you later because it’s a long story. But ultimately, the past few months have been rough between us. I figured all couples go through rough patches and that was one of ours. He kept making promises and vowed to never lie or keep things from me again, but when it came down to it, I didn’t fully trust him.”

  “So if I had shown up and walked down that aisle, you would’ve gone through with it?” he asks.

  “I don’t know…I want to think I wouldn’t have. You kissing me and your note aren’t the reasons Trent and I weren’t working out, but it was what I needed to realize I was marrying the wrong person. I didn’t want to disappoint my family so close to the wedding after all the money and effort they’d put in, and I think that’s part of the reason I overlooked so many of our issues. Then when I walked down the aisle, something didn’t sit well in my stomach. It was supposed to be the happiest moment of my life, and as soon as I looked at John for confirmation on where you were, he just shook his head and shrugged as if he knew I was making a mistake. Trent wanted a trophy wife, but he kept secrets from me, and ultimately, his actions are what broke us apart.”

  “Wow…I wish you’d felt c
omfortable enough to come to me during those times, but I know I haven’t exactly been a good friend to you. That’s my fault one hundred percent.”

  “It probably wouldn’t have mattered. I was naïve and living in a fantasy world. Love makes you blind, and when I finally opened my eyes, the signs were clear as day. I just want to be able to explain that to my family and Trent before they all point fingers at you.”

  “I understand, baby. Just know I’ll be supporting you from afar. Call me anytime, night or day, and I’ll be there. And if you need me to come punch Trent in the face for you, I’ll do that too.” He grins, but there’s a hint of sadness in his tone. I know this isn’t easy for him either, considering he needs to stay on the sidelines for now.

  “Thank you.” I kiss him. “I’ll call you as soon as I can, okay? I need to get home and get out of this dress, though.”

  Jackson helps me off the tailgate and walks me to the driver’s side before pinning me to the door for one last sensual kiss. “Good luck.”

  My heart pounds as I drive down the gravel driveway to my parents’ house. I see the large, white tent in the distance and notice several trucks are still parked nearby. A quick glance tells me neither Trent nor any of his family are there, and I exhale with relief. I know he deserves an explanation, but I’d much rather do it after I speak with my family.

  I park Evan’s truck in the first open spot in front of the house and turn it off, but don’t get out. People are in the tent, probably eating the food so it doesn’t go to waste. Music echoes in the distance and a part of me is happy that they continued with the reception. Knowing my family and the Bishops, they’re drinking and having a good time while they wait for me to return.

  After a few minutes, I decide to step out and walk up the porch. Through the screen door, I can see no one’s in the kitchen and figure it’s safe to enter. As soon as the door slams behind me, my mama comes walking in from the living room.

  “Oh thank God.” She rushes toward me and wraps her arms around me. “I’ve been so worried. Emily said you took Evan’s truck to go find Jackson but wasn’t sure where you went. You didn’t answer your phone.”

  “I’m sorry, Mama. I didn’t have my phone. I found Jackson. He’s fine, too.”

  She squeezes me tightly before pulling back to study me. “Are you okay?” She’s inspecting me to make sure I’m emotionally okay.

  “Mama, I’m fine. I promise. For the first time in the past few years, I’m thinking clearly.” I flash her a smile, so she knows I’m being truthful. “I just couldn’t marry Trent. He wasn’t…the one.”

  The corner of her lips tilts up into a relieved smile. “I know, baby.” She pats my arm. “Let’s get you changed, and we can talk.”

  Mama helps me out of the dress, and I change into something much more comfortable. I grab my phone and see it’s almost dead from all the missed calls and text messages—most of them from Trent. He’s left me five voicemails and guilt surfaces as I contemplate on how I’m going to face him.

  Kiera: Can I come over and talk? Please let me explain.

  I don’t bother listening to his messages, knowing they’re probably full of anger and hate. While I wait for his response, I head out to the tent with my mama and brace myself for what’s to come.

  Emily spots me immediately and rushes over. She wraps her arms around me and inspects me similar to how my mama did. “You okay?”

  I nod and smile. “Yeah. I’m great.”

  She grabs my hand and pulls me to where the other Bishops are sitting and drinking. They look just as relieved to see me, but they don’t berate me with questions right away, which I’m grateful for.

  Members of my family stuck around, and I decide to go to them and apologize for the events. They ask if I’m okay and why I left. I give them a quick, condensed version about Trent and me not being right for each other and how I couldn’t go through with it when I wasn’t one hundred percent sure about our relationship. They listen and nod, though I’m certain most of them are skeptical. Even though that’s the truth, I purposely leave out the parts about Jackson kissing me and the note.

  An hour later, I check my phone and see Trent’s message pop up.

  Trent: Fuck off, Kiera. Your shit’s on the lawn. Might want to come get it before it burns just like the Bishop barn did.

  My eyes widen in shock, and then all my suspicions are confirmed.

  He was always a monster. I just didn’t want to see it even when the signs were there.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Kiera

  I feel as if a black cloud is hanging above me. This isn’t over yet, and the dread of going to Trent’s to grab my shit off his lawn is causing panic. I thought I’d have a little time away at least, or he’d have time to calm down. But that’s not how Trent does things. It’s usually to the extreme. I understand how mad he is, and how he wants me out of his life, so now is as good a time as ever to move all my shit out, I guess.

  If I were left at the altar, I’d be just as hurt, but going through with the wedding would’ve hurt us both a lot worse. Having to go through a divorce and a possible legal battle while being fed lies–it’s almost frightening what could’ve happened. We didn’t sign a prenup, and I’m not so sure he wouldn’t have fought to take half of everything I worked for over the past decade. I’m so unsettled and mad at myself for not standing strong a month ago when I told him I couldn’t marry him. All this could’ve been avoided, but he wouldn’t let me go. And a part of me didn’t want to.

  I should’ve figured it out sooner or actually listened to the internal alarms that’ve been going off, but I didn’t, so here I am. The girls circle around me and notice something’s wrong. I tell them what Trent’s message says, minus the reference to the Bishop barn. The wound is still too fresh to discuss that. The silver lining in the storm clouds is Jackson. I think I’m still in shock from it all.

  “You’re not going alone,” Mila tells me. She looks over her shoulder at Evan, John, and Alex who are drinking and laughing at Colton as he makes a fool of himself on the dance floor. I’m actually glad none of the food or beer is going to waste and that some people are still enjoying themselves. As soon as John sees the look in Mila’s eyes, he takes it as his cue and walks over.

  “Round up your brothers, you’re all going to be Kiera’s bodyguards.” Mila doesn’t give John a choice.

  “Is everything okay?” he asks, looking back and forth between us.

  “Trent threw all my stuff in his yard, so I need to go get it.”

  John shakes his head. “He’s such a damn baby. I’ll get everyone together.”

  “I know. And it doesn’t help that he’s mad either.” I let out a deep breath, happy Mila volunteered them to join me. It makes me feel a lot safer knowing they’ll all be there.

  John walks across the dance floor and tells them all what’s going on. Within moments, I’m surrounded by four big guys, and I know they’re enough to keep Trent straight.

  “I’ll drive, considering I’m the only one who’s sober,” Evan states, holding his palm out.

  “I owe you one for letting me take your pride and joy,” I tell him, handing his keys over. I actually forgot I still had them.

  He lets out a hearty laugh and pats me on my back as the posse follows. We all load up in Evan’s truck. My mind races as we pull out of the ranch and travel ten minutes down the road. It’s almost as if time is standing still as we turn onto the country road that leads to Trent’s land. I’ve driven down this road every day for a little over a year, and it’s almost bittersweet to know I’ll have no reason to come down here again.

  Alex leans forward in the seat. “So, you and Jackson?” he asks with a grin.

  “Leave her alone.” John elbows him. “Don’t you think she’s gone through enough today?”

  “There were just too many red flags I couldn’t ignore any longer,” I admit truthfully.

  “Impeccable timing, though,” Colton says with a laugh. “At
least you didn’t go through with it. Could’ve been a huge ass mess. Oh, speaking of, I think that means Jackson owes me a shit ton of money.”

  I laugh, remembering the stupid bet and turn to look at him. “How’d you know it wasn’t going to happen? I’m pretty sure you’re the only one who thought that.”

  He shrugs. “Just a gut feeling. I saw the way you looked at Jackson. There’s no way you’d go through with that wedding when I could see your burning love for someone else.”

  Alex lets out a big aww, and it’s followed by laughter.

  “Well, at least I don’t have to say I’m divorced now.” I try to make light of what happened, even though it’s a messy situation. I should’ve listened to my gut, but that’s easier said than done, and I now realize how naïve I was. The man I fell in love with wasn’t the same man I was going to marry, and the thought alone sends shivers down my spine.

  Soon we’re pulling up to Trent’s place, and as promised, my shit is thrown on the front lawn. My clothes, toiletries, basically everything. He’s had hours to do this, so it doesn’t surprise me that everything’s there.

  I let out a deep breath and unbuckle. Evan gets out of the truck, and I follow him. As I’m walking past all my stuff, I notice photos that were taken of Trent and me together torn in half, and only my half is there. I shake my head and look around at my things on the ground. This is so damn disrespectful and childish, but I know this is his way of lashing out, to somewhat try to get me back for what I did to him.

  The guys pick up my things and place them in the back of the truck just as the front door swings open. Trent’s face is red, and I can tell he’s been drinking and crying. The way he looks breaks my heart, and I’m truly sorry I let it go this far.

  “Trent…”

  “Shut the fuck up, Kiera. Don’t say a goddamn word to me.” His voice is full of poison, and by the way he’s looking at me, I know I’m the last person on this planet he wants to see.