Ethan (Alluring Indulgence)

by Edwards, Nicole

  Once his truck was parked, he sat with his hands gripping the steering wheel, his mind settling as the adrenaline drained from his body. God he was tired all of a sudden.

  A tap on the window had him slowly turning his head. Ethan was standing outside the truck, the wind gusting around him. He made a motion for Beau to roll down the window, but Beau opened the door instead. Rather than getting out, he turned slightly to face Ethan, another shot of adrenaline tearing through his already emotionally drained body.

  Ethan.

  He was there. Not two feet away from him. The man’s calm mask was solidly in place, but Beau could sense the tension in his body. He had to wonder whether he was the reason for the way Ethan’s shoulders bulged against the black button down shirt he had on over a dark gray t-shirt. Or maybe Ethan was still riled from Ricky’s foul mouth.

  “Where’re you gonna put this?” Ethan asked, looking around as though he were trying to find the secret place Beau might stash a fully stocked mechanic’s toolbox.

  Apparently Ethan was back in business mode.

  Shit. He hadn’t thought about that. It wasn’t like he could get the damn thing up to his apartment on the third floor. Shrugging, Beau didn’t take his eyes off of Ethan. “Hadn’t thought that far.”

  Ethan actually smiled and Beau found himself frozen in place. The man was so fucking handsome. Blue-gray eyes that darkened to a deep, cobalt blue when he was angry; a stern, angled jaw covered with at least a week’s worth of beard, along with a slightly crooked nose that looked as though it’d been broken at some point, although Beau couldn’t for the life of him remember when that could’ve happened. And when he smiled, Beau wasn’t sure he’d ever seen anything quite like it.

  He had the urge to touch him, to reach out and run the backs of his fingers down Ethan’s stubbly cheek. To grab him, crush his mouth to Ethan’s and take everything he’d desired for months. The memory of the night he’d kissed Ethan hit him like a surprise blow to the head.

  Great.

  Now he seriously wanted to kiss him.

  Chapter Six

  ♂♂

  Ethan found himself staring at Beau, watching every nuance of his expression, even the way his chocolate brown eyes stared back at him as though he weren’t actually seeing him.

  Was he still in shock maybe? Or just reliving what had just happened?

  Unable to look away, Ethan tracked Beau as he climbed down from his oversized truck, a fire red GMC Sierra 3500HD – the kind of truck chicks went crazy for and threaded a ribbon of jealousy through the cowboys who got close enough to witness its power. As far as Ethan was concerned, it suited Beau to a T, but would be a colossal pain in his ass to work on for its sheer size alone.

  When Beau climbed down to the ground just a few feet in front of him, Ethan let his gaze rake over him, hoping he wasn’t being quite as obvious as he felt. He couldn’t help himself. Something about the man, the way he carried himself, had Ethan’s entire body taking notice. He was absolute perfection.

  Beau lifted his ball cap from his head and ran his hand through his disheveled blond hair and looked around, like he didn’t realize where he was. When he turned to face Ethan, he felt the passion in his gaze dart across his entire body like a physical caress. Beau obviously didn’t try to hide his attraction the way Ethan hoped he had. If he would have to guess, Beau was still a little stunned by the scene back at Dillinger’s, which was probably part of the reason he appeared to be confused.

  Ethan had been down that road before. The one that led to anger so explosive, he feared what he’d do. Now… well, now he treaded lightly because showing the hurt or the anger only made things worse.

  Remembering the incident, the word that had come out of Ricky’s mouth, had his hands trembling with lingering anger. Shoving his hands in his pockets, he looked down at the ground for a minute, trying to catch his breath.

  Ricky’s reaction wasn’t something Ethan had to deal with on a daily basis – anymore – but that was because he kept himself holed up as often as possible. He had certainly handled his fair share of harassment over the years. More so when he was younger, too confused to understand that he wasn’t like everyone else, and too stupid to realize he should just keep his mouth shut.

  Not that Ethan could do anything to change how Ricky reacted, or anyone else for that matter. It wasn’t the first time someone would take a stab at him, and it wasn’t – by a long shot – the most he’d had to endure. It didn’t matter that he never flaunted his lifestyle, nor did he talk about it, but there was always someone who thought they could antagonize him. It was a small town. Rumors existed. That was life and Ethan had accepted long ago that the only thing he could do was keep his mouth shut, his eyes forward and try his best to ignore them.

  Ricky Dillinger was a prick. Always had been and always would be. His “faggot” comment hadn’t surprised Ethan in the least. In fact, he was surprised it hadn’t come sooner than it had. There was no love lost between Ethan and that little bastard. But what had surprised him was Beau’s reaction. If the guy was going to get all up in arms about bigots like Ricky who spewed filth when they opened their mouths, he was in for a world of hurt in the future.

  “You ok?” Ethan found himself asking, unable to hide his concern for Beau, even if he knew the guy was going to have to get tougher skin if he expected to live his life openly.

  Beau shook his head as though to shake out the cobwebs before looking at him, his eyes seeming to clear somewhat.

  “Good. Sorry.”

  “No need to apologize to me. You’ll have to get used to assholes like Ricky mouthing off like that. Trust me, that was tame compared to what I’ve heard before.”

  Beau stood up straight, the muscles in his shoulders tensing, his brows furrowing as he looked at Ethan. “I don’t have to get used to shit.”

  Ethan hadn’t expected Beau’s defensive response, but, as usual, his own defenses locked into place. “Well, tough guy, if you’re gonna come out of the closet, you’ll have to get used to people sharing their opinions. Right or wrong, they aren’t nearly as accepting as you want them to be.”

  Ethan turned to walk away, wanting to find a way to busy himself so he could get the hell out of there. He didn’t make it two steps before Beau’s hand was on his arm, successfully spinning him back to face him.

  “You think that was because I give a fuck what that spineless little prick thinks about me?”

  Beau’s statement forced Ethan’s irritation level even higher. He took a step closer, getting right up in Beau’s face.

  Fuck.

  If there was any difference in their height, it was maybe an inch at most – in Beau’s favor – which put them nose to nose. Beau’s shoulders were wider, his chest too, but aside from that, from where he stood, they were a pretty good match.

  Ethan wasn’t quite sure whether it was Beau’s intimidating stance or whether he actually was bigger than he was giving him credit for, but Ethan felt… smaller. And he liked the fuck out of it for some strange reason. There weren’t all that many men who could make him feel that way.

  But that wasn’t the only thing Ethan noticed as he stood so close to Beau. How was it the guy could still smell so damn good when he spent the day rummaging around in a greasy engine? His scent was potent; a fresh clean smell interspersed with that sexy cologne he wore and a hint of engine grease.

  “Well, I know it damn sure wasn’t because you were defending my honor.” Ethan laughed without mirth, remembering why he was standing so close as he pulled out of Beau’s grasp.

  Attraction or not, he damn sure didn’t like the idea of Beau coming to his rescue. He didn’t need anyone fighting his battles for him.

  “Well, I hate to disappoint you, but that’s just who I am,” Beau said, turning away from him.

  “No, uh-uh,” Ethan growled, grabbing Beau the same way he had him seconds before. “Don’t you dare walk away from me.”

  Tempers were high, evident when Beau too
k a step closer, coming nearly nose to nose with Ethan again and forcing him back against the door of his own truck.

  “Why?” Beau inquired. “You want me to stand here so you can tell me to mind my own business?”

  Yes. That was exactly what he wanted to tell Beau.

  A gust of wind whipped around them, a chill racing down Ethan’s spine. He wasn’t sure whether he was more affected by the cold bite of the air or the glacial look in Beau’s eyes.

  “You can’t fight my battles,” Ethan said forcefully, trying to grab hold of the last remnants of his control. He tried to ignore the flex of Beau’s arm beneath his hand, or the intensely sexy scent of that cologne Beau favored. Or the fact that they were nearly chest to chest.

  He damn sure wasn’t interested in letting Beau see how fucking hot he made him. Not to mention, he didn’t want to fight with Beau. Hell, he didn’t want to talk to Beau period. He was here as a favor to Zane. That was the only reason he would’ve signed up for this shit.

  “That wasn’t your battle to fight,” Beau said seriously. “But I can tell you one thing…” Beau shoved his finger in Ethan’s chest, and the simple pressure had Ethan sucking in a breath, and it wasn’t because it hurt. No, quite the opposite. “I won’t stand back and let anyone talk shit about those I care about.”

  Ethan released Beau’s arm and shoved the hand stabbing at him away. Hard. He wasn’t going to stand there and listen to Beau spout bullshit about caring about him. He might want to fuck him, but that was about all there was to this.

  “I’m not your business,” Ethan said lethally.

  Beau didn’t move an inch, but Ethan felt as though he were pressed fully up against him. The heat from his colossal body somehow forced away the icy February breeze and warmed him from the inside out.

  Not a good thing.

  “I want you to be my business.”

  Ethan shook his head. “You don’t know what you want. If you’re smart, you’ll stay as far away from me as possible.”

  He had wanted to warn the man off of him for too long. Now that he had the opportunity, Ethan almost wished he could take the words back. Only they were the truth. Beau deserved better than what Ethan had to offer him or any man for that matter. It was hard enough to engage in relationships that were strictly sexual in nature, but that’s all Ethan had to offer. That was all he wanted to offer.

  Before he could say anything more, Beau was closer, the warmth of his chest seeping through the thin layers of cotton that separated them.

  “I know exactly what I want. And you’d be smart to give in because I can tell you, I don’t have any intentions of giving up.”

  And just like that, Beau’s warmth disappeared as he took a step back. Ethan was gearing up to give Beau a piece of his mind when a truck door slammed, and Ethan jerked to see who it was. Beau growled, low and intimidating. Something Ethan had gotten familiar with. It was Beau’s possessive response he’d noticed. And, damn it all to hell, he liked the sound way too much.

  “Son of a bitch,” Ethan groaned, his eyes locking with Blake’s over the hood of the wrecker.

  “What the hell is he doing here?” Beau growled from behind him, the deep, gravelly sound of his voice causing an influx of heat to build inside of Ethan.

  “He doesn’t know when to give up,” Ethan muttered as he walked away from Beau. “What do you want, Blake? I’ve got shit to do today. I don’t have time for this.”

  “But you have time for him?” Blake asked, his green eyes narrowed to slits as he stared past him at Beau.

  The guy looked like shit. And that was saying something because Blake had always looked good. Always put together. A metrosexual, Ethan thought they were called, Blake was known for his attention to detail when it came to his appearance.

  Not today. Blake’s scruffy beard made Ethan’s normal disregard to his appearance look stylish. His dark hair was a mess, obviously not combed that morning. His long-sleeved, navy blue Henley shirt was wrinkled and untucked and as Ethan moved around the truck, he noticed that one of Blake’s pants legs was tucked into his boot as though he’d gotten dressed in the dark.

  “This is work, in case you haven’t noticed.”

  “The hell it is.” Blake’s anger seemed out of place, especially since Blake had insisted on having the last word two weeks ago. “Work would be dumping that shit off. What I saw when I pulled up wasn’t work.”

  Ethan had no idea why he felt the need to explain himself, but he had to catch the words before he went any further. He didn’t want to intentionally hurt Blake, but their time together had run its course, and Ethan did want to move on. Having Blake show up every time he turned around was starting to seriously piss him off.

  “Look, –” Blake promptly cut him off before he could finish his sentence.

  “He’s been talking shit about me, hasn’t he?” Blake asked hysterically. “Is that why you don’t want to see me anymore? Are you listening to his lies?”

  What the fuck? Ethan felt like he was in an alternate universe, one where Blake had the ability to rewrite history and change what had happened.

  Glancing over his shoulder, Ethan noticed that Beau was watching them closely. He turned back to Blake, trying to see what part of this that he’d missed. It wasn’t like Ethan had any contact with Beau. Well, aside from one kiss that had rocked his world and now this… today. But this was business, nothing more.

  Ethan had known Blake for a while. Spent a lot of time with him and was privy to numerous sides of his personality. He certainly was extremely self-centered, insistent that everything revolved around him, but this seemed a little much, even for Blake.

  Ethan had no idea what Blake was rambling about. None whatsoever.

  He turned again to see Beau still staring at the two of them, his biceps bulging through the tight sleeves of his short sleeved t-shirt as he crossed his arms over his chest. How the hell wasn’t he cold? It probably wasn’t more than thirty-five degrees outside, and that didn’t include the wind chill factor.

  Turning back to face Blake, Ethan mirrored Beau’s defensive stance, crossing his arms over his chest and keeping several feet between the two of them. He raised an eyebrow, signaling Blake to continue. If he knew anything about Blake, the guy would ultimately end up putting his own foot in his mouth before it was all over. He never had learned when to shut the hell up.

  “I helped him move his stuff,” Ethan explained, gesturing toward the hulking toolbox still sitting on the flatbed, although he had no idea why he bothered to say anything. He didn’t owe Blake any explanations.

  “Are you dating him?” Blake asked, not seeming to have heard a word Ethan said.

  Ethan leaned in closer to Blake, lowering his voice so only he could hear. “That’s not any of your damn business.” Ethan knew he should’ve just denied it, but he didn’t. He wasn’t dating anyone, hadn’t ever dated anyone, in fact. But more accurately, there wasn’t anything between him and Beau.

  Blake met his gaze, his green eyes glittering like emeralds. He was pissed, but Ethan wasn’t sure why that was.

  “You fucker,” Blake yelled at Beau over Ethan’s shoulder. “You should learn to keep your fucking mouth shut. What happens between us is none of your goddamn business.”

  Ethan grabbed Blake’s arm, pulling him around the side of the truck and out of Beau’s line of sight. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

  “I know he told you. But he’s a fucking liar.”

  When Ethan stared back at him, trying to catch up to the crazy that had obviously infiltrated Blake’s brain, Blake stopped talking. Ethan spurred him on when he said, “What exactly did he lie about?”

  “I wasn’t really with that guy that night. But I knew he’d lie about it so you wouldn’t want to see me anymore. He was just a friend. Nothing happened.”

  Ethan’s heart did a strange misstep in his chest. He felt his face warm as the ever-present anger that simmered on low inside of him roared to a full boil. The biting
cold wind had nothing on the fire that suffused his face as he stared back at Blake. Of all the crap he had expected of Blake, being a cheater hadn’t been it. But obviously, based on the story he was telling, that’s exactly what he was. And Ethan had no room in his life for that shit.

  “You cheated on me?”

  Shit. Why did he ask that? It sounded like they’d actually been in a relationship. They hadn’t. It was just casual sex. Friends with benefits. Ethan didn’t do relationships. And he damn sure didn’t have a relationship with Blake.

  “I didn’t. Beau’s lying,” Blake retorted defensively.

  “Well, then, why don’t you explain your side of the story.” Crossing his arms over his chest again, Ethan tried to contain his temper.

  Sure, Ethan was now being manipulative, but he deserved the full story. Part of him wanted to rip Beau a new one for keeping something like that from him, but if he honestly thought about it, it wasn’t any of Beau’s business. Still wasn’t Beau’s business.

  “It was one date. A long time ago. The guy wouldn’t leave me alone, so I met him at a restaurant, but I was very clear up front that I wouldn’t sleep with him.”

  Narrowing his eyes at Blake, because honestly, he didn’t believe a single word that came out of his mouth, he waited for him to continue.

  Blake looked down at the ground, then back up at Ethan. “I only slept with him once.”

  Ethan’s throat closed, he couldn’t swallow.

  It didn’t matter that what he and Blake had before wasn’t serious. Never had been. However, during their time together, Ethan thought it went without saying that they wouldn’t be with anyone else. Cheating was one thing Ethan didn’t tolerate.

  Yanking his ball cap off of his head, Ethan shoved his hands through his hair, he turned his back on Blake, making sure not to look at Beau. How the hell had this happened? And why did Beau have to be witness to this? Why the hell did Beau have to be anywhere around him?

  He felt like an idiot. He’d kept Blake around because he was convenient, but that wasn’t something Ethan would’ve ever shared with Blake. He wasn’t that guy. He didn’t get off on hurting people.