Always Enough

by Elliott, Kelly

  Even in the dim light, I could see her cheeks had turned as red as a tomato, and I couldn’t help but laugh.

  “You wish,” she spat back.

  “Probably for the best, since your boyfriend wouldn’t like that, now would he?”

  Her mouth opened to say something, but then she shut it. A slow smirk moved across her face. “Are you jealous of Channing?”

  The fact that she hadn’t denied she was seeing him did something to me. A painful squeezing sensation nearly took my breath away. I grabbed my sweats and pulled them on.

  “Are you not putting underwear on?” she asked, complete shock lacing her voice. God, I was enjoying this little encounter more than I should.

  “No,” I said as I reached into my bag and pulled out a T-shirt. I slipped it on before I reached for my jeans and the other shirt and stuffed them into the bag. As I walked out of the bathroom, I stopped and looked at her. “And to answer your earlier question, no, I’m not jealous of Channing. You make a good couple.”

  Her mouth opened slightly; then she licked her lips and pressed them tightly shut. She stepped out of my way.

  “If you need help using the bathroom, let me know.”

  I headed into the living room and dropped my bag at the front door, then reached for my phone on the coffee table and pulled up Tanner’s number. I sent him a quick text, thankful to see it went through.

  Me: Do you think you could get into the plow and make a road for me to get the fuck home?

  Tanner: Dude, have you seen it outside? It’s a blizzard. Where are you?

  Me: Stuck at Kaylee’s house.

  The bastard sent me a text back that was six or seven laughing faces, and maybe a GIF—or ten—of different people falling over in laughter.

  Me: You’re dead to me.

  Tanner: Man, I needed that laugh. Well, if you two can’t work out the shit between you now when you’re stuck together in a storm, you never will.

  Me: Did I mention you were dead to me?

  Tanner: Yes. You did. But I’m still laughing my ass off. Stay warm. I’m sure you can think of a few ways to do that.

  Me: Fuck you, Tanner.

  I turned off my phone and dropped it onto the coffee table. Kaylee walked into the living room, and it was then I realized she had changed into sweatpants and a sweatshirt. I knew it must have hurt like a bitch for her to change on her own. I couldn’t help but wonder if she would rather suffer and do it alone than ask me for help. The idea hurt more than I wanted to admit. She was holding the ice pack.

  “This sofa actually pulls out into a bed. I mean, we could put the sofa pillows down the middle, to keep to our own sides.”

  “Don’t worry about it. I’ll sleep on the floor in front of the fire so I can keep it going all night. If you want the bed pulled out, I can do that for you, though.”

  She shook her head. “No, the couch itself is more comfortable. I put the soup into a container and in the refrigerator.”

  “I was going to do that. You didn’t hurt yourself doing all that walking, did you?”

  “No, it’s fine. I needed something to do so I wouldn’t feel completely helpless.”

  I nodded and then walked over to the fire, moving the logs around and adding another one.

  “I was thinking we could watch a movie, then remembered that wasn’t possible.”

  “Definitely need power for that.”

  Her cheeks turned a slight pink, or maybe it was from the chill in the air. “Ty, I . . . I just wanted to say thank you for helping me.”

  Standing, I turned to her. She was making her way over to the sofa. I quickly followed and helped her sit. She was able to get the ice pack situated as she lay down, which sort of disappointed me. That meant I couldn’t touch her, and touching her was one of my new favorite things to do.

  “Let me get the pillow under your legs,” I said.

  “I brought down another pillow and some extra blankets. They’re on the bench by the stairs.”

  Facing the bench, I saw the blankets. “I’ll grab you another one.”

  I walked over and picked up the three blankets. Dropping two on the floor, I took the other one and draped it over Kaylee.

  “Thank you,” she whispered, her eyes looking at me as if she was trying to tell me something but didn’t know how.

  I turned away from her and dropped the one pillow on the floor, then lay down, pulling both blankets over me.

  It was going to be a long fucking night.

  Chapter Ten

  KAYLEE

  I had no idea what time it was. All I knew was that I’d woken up and I was freezing. The more I shivered, the worse the pain became in my tailbone. Ty was sleeping on the floor, and the fire was slowly burning out.

  I thought about getting up to put more wood on, but at that very moment, Ty stirred and quickly stood. He grabbed the poker and moved the wood around, causing a big flame to shoot up. He placed three more pieces of wood into the fire and then turned. I was positive my teeth were chattering.

  “Sorry, I didn’t mean for it to get that low.”

  “S’okay,” I managed to get out.

  Ty reached down and grabbed another blanket and walked over to me.

  With a shake of my head, I said, “N-no. I just need it to warm up a bit and . . . and . . . I’ll be fine.”

  He frowned. “Jesus, Kaylee, your lips are practically blue. Do you have any quilts?”

  I nodded and pointed upstairs. Ty moved quickly up the steps and soon reappeared with the quilt from my bed and one from the other bedroom upstairs. When he draped one over me, I pulled it over my head.

  “Do you need me to warm you up?”

  Every inch of me stopped moving. I think even my heart paused for a moment.

  Say no. Say no. Say no. Say no, for Pete’s sake, Kaylee!

  When I didn’t answer, I felt the quilt and covers move down. “Can you move forward and get on your side? I’ll slip in behind you.”

  I was so cold, I couldn’t even argue with him. The idea of any kind of heat was something I cared more about at the moment. I carefully moved, placing a pillow between my legs as I turned to my side.

  Ty placed the now-warm ice pack on the coffee table and carefully climbed over my body and slipped down onto the sofa. He wrapped his arm around me, bringing my body flush against his.

  My heart raced in my chest and my teeth chattered, but I wasn’t so sure it was from the cold anymore, because my body instantly heated at his touch. At the feel of him against me. His dick was pressed into my ass, and I could feel it better than I should have thanks to his going commando.

  Ignore the large penis pressed against you. He’s not even hard. See, you don’t do anything for him. Not. A. Thing.

  My mind went back to a few hours ago, when I’d walked into the bathroom and found him butt-ass naked. The man had a body to die for. His abs had abs. He was toned in all the right places. His chest was broad, and his muscles . . . I was getting warm just thinking of them.

  Let’s not forget his dick—Lord Almighty, he was thick and long. The way it got so hard, so fast, and then jumped against his stomach had my panties instantly soaking wet. It had been a long time since I’d been with a man, and I’d wanted to drop to my knees and taste him so badly, I hadn’t been able to think straight. Good thing my tailbone hurt like a bitch and I hadn’t totally lost all my senses in that moment, or I might have.

  “Are you okay? Lying like this doesn’t hurt you, does it?”

  The concern in his voice caused tears to fill my eyes. I forced myself to keep my voice calm and steady as I answered him. “I’m good—it doesn’t hurt.”

  He held me a bit tighter, and this time a tear did fall. Then another. I squeezed my eyes shut and wished more than anything that Ty felt the same way about me as I did him.

  “Good night, Kaylee,” he whispered in the softest voice.

  Determined not to let him know I was upset, I spoke clearly. “Night, Ty.”

&nbs
p; He soon drifted off to sleep, his breathing slow and rhythmic, me in his arms, tucked nicely against his body. It was a terribly romantic moment, one you would read about in a romance novel. It might as well have been fiction.

  I cursed myself for being so foolish. There was a man out there willing and ready to have a relationship with me, yet I couldn’t seem to let go of my feelings for Ty.

  I willed myself not to cry again. Instead, I closed my eyes as sleep overtook me and soon got lost in a dream.

  A dream that would soon turn into a nightmare.

  John stood before me, a gun held in his hand.

  “I’m not happy, Kaylee. I haven’t been for a long time.”

  Tears streamed down my face. “John, please, we can figure this out.”

  He shook his head. “No, it’s too late.”

  I wrapped my arms around my body and cried harder. “It’s never too late. Please don’t do this. Please!”

  The sound of the gun firing caused me to scream. I covered my eyes and prayed it wasn’t real. I hadn’t just seen my fiancé take his own life. It was a dream. Please, dear God, please let this be a dream.

  “Kaylee? Kaylee, wake up.”

  My eyes shot open and I gasped for breath. Ty was crouched in front of me, concern etched all over his face. His beautiful blue eyes were looking directly into mine.

  “You had a nightmare. A very intense one. Are you okay?”

  I reached out and placed my hand on the side of his face. Was this a dream still? I was so confused. Pain engulfed me. Both physical and emotional. My head, my lower back, my heart. It felt all consuming.

  When his hand covered mine, tingles zipped through my body, and I knew in that moment that I wasn’t dreaming.

  “I haven’t had that dream in a long time,” I finally said.

  “Do you want to talk about it?”

  Normally my answer to that question was no. But I was tired of saying no. Tired of keeping it all inside. Tired of being alone and pretending that my life was completely normal when it was so far from normal.

  I slowly moved to sit up, my lower back still hurting something fierce, but it wasn’t as bad as it had been earlier. Ty moved back, still crouched down, now looking up at me.

  “I have this dream that I’m in the room with John.” Ty had a confused look on his face at the mention of him. “John was my fiancé. He took his own life a few years ago. Anyway, I’m in the room when he kills himself. It’s so vivid, and there are moments I can’t tell if it’s a dream or a memory. It’s really odd, because I wasn’t there when he killed himself. But in the dream, I’m right in front of him, begging him not to pull the trigger, and it feels so real. It’s unnerving.”

  Ty took my hands in his but didn’t say anything, which, oddly, I appreciated. I hated when people said they were sorry or that it wasn’t my fault. I just wanted someone to listen. Someone other than the therapists.

  “I had been out of town when John shot himself. My parents had this benefit dinner in the Hamptons, and they had asked me to fly to New York. I had no idea John was so tormented. So unhappy. A few months before he took his life, he had mentioned splitting up but then changed his mind. I didn’t see any signs. No one did. For the longest time, I blamed myself. My thinking was that I wasn’t good enough for him, didn’t pay him enough attention. Maybe he’d met someone else, someone who loved him better than I did. I still don’t know why he did it, because he didn’t say much in his note. Not knowing has been the worst kind of torture.”

  My eyes met Ty’s. “I was pretty fucked up after it happened. I didn’t want to leave my apartment; I didn’t want to see anyone who was connected to him in any way. I lived in seclusion until Lincoln forced me out of the house one day and took me to see a therapist. She saved my life . . . truly, she did. I haven’t had that dream since I moved to Montana . . . until tonight.”

  Ty looked down and then back up at me. “Do you think it was because I was here?”

  My eyes widened in shock. “No. Not at all.”

  Honestly, I had no idea if his presence had anything to do with the dream’s returning, but I certainly wouldn’t put that on Ty.

  “Is it because you’ve moved on?”

  “I haven’t moved on with anyone, and even if I had, I wouldn’t feel guilty. I know now I deserve happiness, and I know John would’ve wanted that.”

  “But you have moved on. You’re with Channing.”

  Laughing, I rolled my eyes. “I’m not with Channing. For fuck’s sake, Ty, I went out to dinner and to a bar with him. Did a bit of dancing, and that was it.”

  Something that looked like anger flashed over his face.

  I studied him, narrowing my eyes. “Did Channing tell you something happened between us? Because nothing did.”

  “You kissed him.”

  I jerked my hands out of his, causing a sharp pain in my lower back. “How do you know that?”

  He shrugged. “I saw you kissing him; then he followed you into your house.”

  “Are you stalking me or something? Oh my God, was that you on the horse that night?”

  Ty rubbed the back of his neck, then stood and walked over to the fire. “I happened to see you that night when he brought you home—that’s all.”

  “Well, you obviously only saw part of what happened,” I said, slowly getting up from my sitting position while I ignored the pain and walked over to him. He put a few more logs on the fire. “What you didn’t see was him leaving a few minutes later, after he used the restroom. Nothing happened.”

  “You don’t owe me any explanations, Kaylee.”

  I stared at him. Confusion whipped around my head, making me feel dizzy. I wanted to hit him. This man was going to drive me insane. One moment he acted jealous; the next he acted like he didn’t care. Which one was it? Because I was sort of getting whiplash here.

  “Then why did you bring it up, Ty?”

  “I was only trying to help, by telling you it’s okay to move on.”

  With a scoff, I grabbed his arm and made him turn around to face me. “I don’t need you or anyone telling me that. I know it’s okay to move on. The only problem is, the guy I want to move on with has zero interest in me.”

  Ty’s blue eyes turned dark with lust, and a bubble of desire flitted through my stomach. I wanted him to kiss me more than I wanted my next breath.

  Something in the air changed between us, and I knew he felt it as much as I did.

  He took a step closer, his lips parted slightly, his eyes focused on my mouth, then up to my eyes and back to my mouth.

  Kiss me, Ty! For the love of all things, kiss me!

  Right as he leaned in closer, there was a loud cracking sound on the front porch.

  Ty and I both turned to look. He moved away from me and walked to the front door while I closed my eyes and cursed internally. The universe was trying to tell me something. Maybe it was time I actually listened to it.

  “Holy shit!” he gasped.

  “What? What’s wrong?” I asked, making my way over to him.

  “I don’t know how much snow has fallen, but the weight of the snow on your porch roof caused part of it to collapse.”

  “Collapse!” I shouted, looking out the window. He was right: the steps were now blocked with part of the porch roof and more snow than I had seen in a long time. “Well, shit, it’s a good thing I haven’t bought the place from Lincoln yet.”

  Ty turned and looked at me, a smile on his face. He looked so young and carefree in that moment that I couldn’t help but smile back. Then we both laughed. Actual belly laughs at the absurdity of our situation.

  It felt so amazing to share this moment with him. It reminded me of when we had found out Lincoln was pregnant. Ty had hugged me and spun me around, both of us giddy, knowing that we knew something neither Lincoln nor Brock knew yet. Lincoln had been only a few weeks pregnant and had fainted in the hospital after Brock had been hurt when a bull charged him after a ride for a charity at a local rodeo.
They’d run a pregnancy test, and it had come back positive. I might have told the hospital a little white lie that I was Lincoln’s sister. That was how Ty and I found out about the baby.

  I had so much fun with him that afternoon. We talked about the baby and came up with different ideas of how to break the news to Lincoln. We went on about how excited we were to see Lincoln’s shocked face. I had felt that connection between us and thought Ty had as well. It didn’t take long before he was pushing me away from him as he fell back into the routine of making his silly insults and pretending we hadn’t had another amazing connection.

  Just like then, I knew it wouldn’t be long before he returned to his normal behavior and I became the annoying girl whom he couldn’t stand to be around.

  I turned away and walked over to my phone to check the time. I had a message from Lincoln I’d somehow missed.

  “Lincoln wants to make sure we haven’t killed each other.”

  “Why is she up so late?” Ty asked, making his way toward the kitchen. Our little moment appeared to be over.

  “Probably the baby.”

  I typed back that we were fine and I was feeling better. She didn’t reply, which told me she had fallen back asleep.

  As I slowly made my way to the kitchen, I took in a deep breath to prepare myself for things to go back to the way they were only hours ago. Things between Ty and me were civil, and I wanted to keep it that way. I wasn’t in the mood to argue or spit back and forth with him. I was cold and tired. If he wanted to pretend that he hadn’t almost kissed me only minutes ago, then so would I. I’d continue to play the avoidance game like a master.

  “Do you want some tea? I saw you had some in your pantry.”

  I rubbed the sides of my arms to warm myself up some. “Hot tea sounds good. How are you going to light the stove?” I asked.

  He held up the candle lighter I had bought from Etsy and winked at me. My breath stalled in my throat, and I gave him a nod. The light from the lantern cast a glow that made him look even more handsome than he was. It wasn’t fair. I probably looked like shit, and he still looked deliciously hot in the shadows.