Always Enough

by Elliott, Kelly

  Once he had the stove going, he poured some of the bottled waters into the teapot and put it on the fire.

  “When do you think the power will come back on?”

  “I don’t know,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck and trying not to look worried but doing a piss-poor job of it. “Probably not until at least midmorning.”

  I sighed and looked at the chair. The thought of sitting again made me wince.

  “You need help sitting down?”

  I shook my head. “No, it’s feeling better. I’m sure I just bruised it. It’s just tender.”

  He nodded.

  Then the silence returned, before Ty broke it just as the water started to boil. “So you’re going to buy this place, huh?”

  Smiling, I replied, “Yeah, Lincoln clearly doesn’t need it. I thought maybe I could turn the little room in the barn into a workroom.”

  “For editing?” he asked, clearly puzzled by that.

  I laughed. “No, for setting up my painting studio and such.”

  Ty paused for a moment and turned to me. “So it was you who painted that painting in the bathroom?”

  “Yeah.”

  His brows pulled in some, and he regarded me for a moment or two. “Kaylee, I didn’t know you could paint.”

  With a shrug and a half-hearted chuckle, I replied, “I can’t. That’s just something I’ve always dabbled in. A little hobby, if you will. I like staying busy.”

  Ty poured the water into the two mugs he had gotten out and handed me one. I wrapped my hands around it and groaned in pure delight.

  “So warm.”

  He grinned and did the same. “How long have you been painting?”

  “I don’t know—since I was around ten, maybe? Once my parents saw I was interested in it and that it kept me busy for hours, they had an entire room set up with easels and paints of every different type. It was a good way to keep me out of their sight.”

  He tilted his head as he tried to read my expression. “Did you take lessons?”

  Laughing, I shook my head. “Hell no. I just painted what I saw. Sort of like authors who write what they see in their minds. They use words; I use pictures. It’s an outlet for me.”

  “Has my mother seen that painting?” he asked.

  I thought about it. “No, I don’t think so. I just finished it a few weeks back and hung it up. It’s a picture of you, Brock, Tanner, and Beck. I’ve seen pictures of him at your folks’ place. Your mom was telling me a story about you three older brothers riding out one day toward the mountain range, and how Tanner had begged y’all to let him go. She said the three of you pretended not to notice him behind you, but it was clear you knew he was there.”

  Ty’s breath hitched. “I remember that day like it was yesterday.” He looked into his tea, his smile fading just a bit. “I’m surprised my mom talked about Beck. She normally doesn’t.”

  “I asked her about him.”

  Ty’s eyes snapped up to mine. “You did?”

  Taking a sip of the tea, I let the warmth slide down my throat and heat my entire body. “Yes. I know what it’s like to hold something inside, to fear talking about it, because then it becomes too real again. It didn’t take me long to see that your mom never spoke about Beck. Your daddy does when it’s just him. He’s mentioned Beck a few times, and I see the hurt in his eyes. Tanner talks about him too. You, Brock, and your mama, y’all keep it all inside. You both take after her in that sense. Keeping your feelings inside, locked up nice and tight where they’re safe. Where the vulnerability can’t get to you.”

  Ty stared at me for the longest moment. Then he chuckled.

  “I think there’s just something about you, Kaylee, that makes people open up. You have something very special inside of you, and they see that.”

  “What about you?”

  He huffed. “What about me?”

  “That day, in the kitchen . . . you wouldn’t have taken them. You know that, right?”

  His entire body went stiff. His blue eyes turned sad, but he never broke the contact his gaze had with mine. “I’m not so sure you’re right. I almost did, but you did a helluva good job at distracting me.”

  I smiled, feeling my cheeks heat as I glanced down at my tea and then back to him. My smile faded, and I could practically feel my heart beating out of my chest. “You wouldn’t have taken them, Ty.” My voice was barely a whisper.

  In that moment, he looked so lost and confused. A million different emotions swept over his face before he finally swallowed hard and shrugged. “I know my desire to not take them was stronger than the urge I had to take them.”

  The corners of my mouth rose slightly, and I nodded.

  He took another drink of his tea and then stood. “I think I’m going to go stoke the fire and climb back under the covers. You need help going to the restroom again? I wouldn’t mind taking another peek at those cute little lacy panties of yours.” He waggled his brows before walking over to the sink.

  “I think one peep show is plenty for you in a twenty-four-hour period. I’m fine. But if you want to sleep on the sofa with me, you can.”

  He looked like I had just jabbed him with the hot poker he used on the firewood. “Um, I mean, if you’re cold I can. Otherwise, I’m fine.”

  “It’s freezing in here, and I’ll be honest: I slept better with your body next to mine.”

  Oh. My. God. What had I just done? I could practically feel my cheeks turning six shades of pink. I lied—okay, maybe it wasn’t all a lie. I had slept better in Ty’s arms.

  I’m pathetic, I thought. I can’t seem to let this man go. It looked like I was ready to use any excuse to have him near me.

  “Um. Okay, yeah.”

  I slowly stood; the pain in my tailbone was easing up. “Maybe I’ll take a few more ibuprofen also.”

  Ty quickly got a bottle of water from the refrigerator and handed it to me, then a couple of pills.

  “Do you need me to put the ice pack between us?”

  Oh, man, I really could’ve come back with a smart-ass answer about him needing to have it there to keep his dick down, but I let it go. I swallowed both pills and shook my head. “We didn’t put it back in the freezer, but I think I’m okay.”

  He nodded and gave me a befuddled, possibly anxious look. Why did sleeping with me on the sofa make him so nervous? Maybe Ty really did have feelings for me, and he didn’t know how to deal with them? It wasn’t a secret he had been a player, but from what I’d seen the last few months, he’d hardly gone out with anyone.

  There was the girl from the bar the other night, though. That memory caused my stomach to feel a little sick.

  I followed him into the living room and watched as he messed with the logs and got the fire going again. He put two more on the fire and then looked back at the sofa. Was that hesitation?

  “You get on first—that way you don’t have to crawl over me,” I said. I couldn’t help the small smile that was tugging at the corners of my mouth. I was rather enjoying this side of Ty Shaw. Unsure. Nervous. Scared, maybe? From what I’d heard from other women in town, the man knew his way around a woman’s body, but the thought of being near me seemed to make him want to run out into the snowstorm.

  I frowned at the thought. Hadn’t he almost kissed me earlier? And what about his issues with Channing? Because thinking I was with another guy had clearly bothered him.

  Ugh. I needed to stop with all of this. Why did I let my emotions get so out of whack around this man?

  “I mean, if it makes you uncomfortable, then you don’t have to. I understand,” I said, giving him an out, although reluctantly.

  He frowned at me and released an exhale before turning away. That was the Ty I was used to. The one who frowned, scoffed, rolled his eyes. He was back. It had taken a bit longer for him to show up, but I knew eventually he’d be here.

  I moved toward the sofa and carefully sat down, wincing at the pain. I tucked the pillow between my legs and lay on my side so
that I could feel the heat of the fireplace on my face. I willed my breathing to be normal and steady. I didn’t hear any movement from Ty, and I wasn’t about to open my eyes and look. For all I knew, he’d taken me up on my offer and was on the floor already, sound asleep.

  It seemed like an eternity before I finally heard him move. My curiosity would be the death of me: I opened an eye to peek, only to see him sitting in the chair, gazing into the fire. He looked as lost and confused as I felt.

  I closed my eyes and prayed that when morning came, Tanner or Brock would have cleared a path and Ty could leave right away.

  I needed him to leave. For my own sanity, I needed him gone.

  Chapter Eleven

  TY

  I knew the moment she finally fell asleep. Her breathing slowed and evened out, and her body relaxed. I could see her perfectly, the light from the fire casting a beautiful glow that seemed to make her even more stunning, if that was possible.

  My gut ached as her words replayed in my head.

  “I mean, if it makes you uncomfortable, then you don’t have to. I understand.”

  I hadn’t said anything in reply. Not a damn word. I watched her get settled on the sofa and stood there like a complete idiot. I’d almost kissed her earlier and then pretended it hadn’t happened. Then again, so had she. But what had she meant about the guy she wanted to move on with not wanting her? I knew she wasn’t talking about Channing; I saw the way that asshole looked at her. He’d climb into her bed in a heartbeat if given the chance.

  My fingers jerked through my hair as I took in a deep breath and then slowly blew it out. I focused on the fire, unable to sleep. The early morning was knocking on the door, and I prayed like hell that Brock or Tanner would be making his way to Kaylee’s place once the sun came up.

  Kaylee moaned, causing me to look over at her. She pulled the quilt up farther, then trembled.

  “Fuck,” I whispered as I stood and put another log on. Then I carefully made my way onto the sofa, making sure I didn’t bump her tailbone.

  It was like she knew I was there. Once I was lying down, I started to pull her body to mine to warm her up. She rolled over, facing me on the sofa.

  Why in the hell did she have such a deep fucking couch?

  Her hands went to my chest, and I stilled. The corners of those pretty little lips of hers rose into a smile, and she whispered my name.

  “Ty.”

  It sounded more like a plea than anything else. Then she nestled in closer, her body pressed against mine. She was still asleep and had no idea what she was doing to me.

  My cock instantly reacted when she threw her leg over mine. If I pulled her closer, my dick would be pressed against her pelvis. I closed my eyes and prayed for strength, or prayed for her to realize what she was doing and put some more distance between our bodies.

  Her hand gripped my T-shirt, and she moaned.

  I closed my eyes and fought for breath. This woman had no fucking idea how hard it was to keep my hands off her. One touch, one kiss, and I knew I would lose all self-control.

  Then she moved closer, and my cock pressed into her, making her hips move against me. I was seriously regretting my decision to not put my boxers back on. I fought to stay still, to not press into her heat.

  Then she moved again.

  Holy shit. She was trying to get on top of me.

  “Kaylee,” I whispered. “Please wake up.”

  The feel of her body pressed to mine was seriously fucking with my mind. I wanted her like I had never wanted anything in my entire life.

  “Mmm,” she said, moving more, grinding her pussy against my hard dick.

  “Fuck it,” I said as I moved, pulling her body on top of mine.

  Her eyes opened and our gazes locked. She was on me, her legs straddling me, her pussy pressed down on my hard-as-fuck cock.

  I swallowed hard, not sure what in the hell I should do. Then she did the one thing I so desperately wanted her to do, and the one thing I so desperately needed her not to do.

  She pressed harder against me, rocked herself on my dick, and pressed her mouth to mine.

  Fucking hell.

  My heart slammed against the wall of my chest. Her lips were as soft as I had remembered. She tasted like mint tea and honey. Our tongues moved slowly at first, until I lost control and laced my fingers in her blonde hair, deepening the kiss. Kaylee rocked faster, causing my cock to throb with the need to push inside her.

  I pulled my mouth from hers. “Your tailbone.”

  “Hurts like a bitch. Please don’t talk. Just keep doing what you’re doing.”

  Her mouth was back on mine; then her hand trailed down my chest and slipped inside my sweatpants.

  If she touched me, so help me God, I was flipping her over and fucking her.

  Then I heard a truck door shut and voices outside.

  I pulled my mouth from Kaylee’s. “Someone’s here.”

  Her hand instantly came out of my pants, and I carefully moved her to the side as I got off the sofa and went to look out the front window.

  Fuck me. I was hard as a steel beam, wearing sweatpants, and my family was outside, interrupting our moment.

  I wasn’t sure if I was pissed or happy as hell. I was leaning toward the first but knew the latter would be the better outcome. My father and Tanner were there, both of them looking at the part of the porch roof that was covering the steps.

  I moved to the door and opened it, letting in a blast of cold air. “Well, if it isn’t the rescue squad!” I said, trying to make my voice even. On the inside, I was a fucking mess, though. I knew it would take months for this to fade from my memory, if it ever did.

  With a quick look to my left, I saw Kaylee sitting on the sofa, a blanket wrapped around her body and a look on her face that nearly made me fall to my knees. She slowly stood. Our eyes met, and I couldn’t tell if what I was seeing was regret, embarrassment, or hurt. All I knew was, I was the cause of it . . . again.

  I’d let my weakness for her take control and nearly made a decision I knew we would both regret. Or at least one of us would. The moment she found out how wrong I was for her, she’d wish it would have never happened.

  “My dad and Tanner are here.”

  Kaylee forced a smile and nodded as she walked past me, still in obvious pain, and up the stairs, not saying a word.

  If I had thought that night at the bar had been hard, this was a thousand times worse, because in my heart, I had wanted to be with her more than I had ever wanted anything in my life.

  Chapter Twelve

  TY

  One month later

  I stood in the middle of the pasture outside the high school with fifteen high school students, all of them focused completely on me. I was grateful for the mild weather today, a balmy sixty degrees, which meant the kids were all out here in jeans and T-shirts, and I still had on a jacket.

  “Bull management and nutrition is essential in the development of bulls, especially bulls being bred to perform in the PBR.”

  Hank Williams raised his hand. I liked this kid—he was named after one of my favorite singers, after all—but he was starting to wear my patience thin today.

  “What about fertility?” Hank asked. “The bull has to play a major role in that?”

  I nodded. “Yes, but today we are talking about nutrition. Not the bulls . . .”

  My voice trailed off.

  “Having sex?” Katelyn Murphy added with a giggle.

  That made them all laugh. Crossing my arms over my chest, I couldn’t help but notice that two of the girls, Missy and Gina, were staring at me. I was pretty damn sure they’d signed up for this class only to ogle me. I was really hoping they would move their attention to Ron, the ripped senior football player who I knew for a fact had a thing for Gina but was too shy to ask her out.

  “Are you all done going through puberty? Can we move on?”

  The timer on my phone went off right then, alerting me that it was time to send th
em all back to the campus. This was an off-site program. Once a month I met with the kids during their last period, which was their 4-H class. I knew Mr. Haven appreciated the break, and I was pretty positive he and Ms. Perry, the senior English teacher, were hooking up and taking advantage of the forty-minute time slot with no students. It was, after all, Ms. Perry’s off period.

  “That’s it for today. I’ll see you guys Saturday morning, and don’t be late. You know how much it pisses me off.”

  “You’re not supposed to swear in front of us,” James Walker said, a smile on his face.

  “That’s not a cussword. Now get the hell out of here. Tell Mr. Haven I’ll get the bulls put back up in their pens.”

  “Bye, Mr. Shaw!” Missy and Gina called out.

  I waved but didn’t look at them. “Later.”

  It was the same reply I gave all the kids.

  Once I had the two bulls our ranch had donated to the school put up and away, I made my way back to the school parking lot. I took my time, since I knew the kids took a while to file out of school and get to their cars.

  My phone vibrated with a message. I pulled it out to look at it. My stomach dropped a bit.

  Kaylee.

  I hadn’t talked to her since the morning of the snowstorm. She’d gone to the doctor, and it turned out she’d only had a bruised tailbone. I’d found out from my mother, who had been over to her place a few times since that morning. I hated that I was avoiding her, and everyone knew I was. Kaylee included. I normally saw her around town, but I had purposely avoided the places I knew I might run into her. I had let myself get dangerously close to giving in to my need for her that morning, and I couldn’t do that again. Not when I knew I wouldn’t be able to give her more, and Kaylee deserved more.

  I drew in a deep breath and opened the text message.

  Kaylee: A package came to my place addressed to you, it’s too big for me to bring it over to you.

  With a frown, I stared at her message. A package? I hadn’t ordered anything.

  Me: Who is it from?