After Always (Always Series Book 5)

by Lindsay Becs

  Her hands meet where her eyes are, and she goes to open my jeans. I can’t keep my mouth off of her when her hands push my pants down over my hips. I step out of my boots and pants, pushing her forward with my body to walk her farther into the house.

  We aren’t moving fast enough. Gripping her by the ass, I pull her up until her legs wrap around me and carry her up to her bedroom, never taking my mouth off of hers.

  Setting her down on her bed, she lands on her knees with me standing in front of her. Bending, I nip at one of her hard nipples through the fabric of her shirt. Her head tips back as she moans. I need more of her. I need her skin on mine. I want my mouth on her. I want inside her. I want it all.

  I rip the shirt from her body, and my hands can’t feel her soft skin fast enough, my mouth going back to her pert nipples, needing to taste them over and over. My hand goes to the back of her pants and slides inside to grab her ass. Surprised to find she’s not wearing underwear, I look up at her with a smirk. “No underwear? Dirty girl,” I tease, pulling a laugh from her.

  Her laughter soon stops when I pull her against me and my erection presses to her center, lining us up through the fabric of what clothes we still have on. I don’t know what I want to do first, next, now; I want it all and can’t do anything fast enough. The sounds she’s making just from this is enough to cause me to blow in my boxers.

  I push her cotton pants down over her round hips and ass, helping her remove them completely, leaving her fully naked before me. I take my time letting my eyes enjoy seeing her like this for the first time.

  She’s so beautiful. Creamy soft skin, curves for days with a small waist and the perfect size breasts. She is the definition of a beautiful woman. “You are so beautiful, Tilly,” I tell her as my fingers lightly trace across her collarbone, over her breasts, over the curves of her body, her hips until finally dipping between her legs.

  She gasps when my finger slides through her slick center and into her. Her lips stay parted as my fingers work in and out of her. I add another finger, making a scissor motion with them as my thumb presses to her clit. I watch as red begins to creep down her skin. Her head falls back, mouth open as she lets the most erotic moan escape. She picks her head up and opens her eyes to look at me with an expression of impending pleasure right on the cusp. She keeps her hooded eyes locked with mine as I bring her to orgasm. She cries out, letting her release take over and falling into me. Her labored breaths fan across my chest and go straight to my cock.

  Lifting her chin to make her look at me, I kiss her lips. “Beautiful,” I say against her mouth.

  Her hands drag down my chest, and I jump when her fingers brush against the head of my cock peeking out of my boxers. “Sensitive?” she asks with a smirk.

  “Cookie, I haven’t had sex with a woman in fifteen years. I think if you just look at my cock, it might explode.”

  “You haven’t…” she starts to ask, surprised by my revelation. I shake my head with a smile playing on my lips.

  She starts to push my boxers down and I help her, kicking them to the side, not taking our eyes off one another. Then, her eyes drop and she licks her lips, making me groan. Looking back up at me with another smirk, she says, “Well, it didn’t go off yet.”

  Gripping her hips, I toss her back onto the bed and crawl up her body. With each move upward, our bodies touch more and more, and it has me going crazy. Her legs spread for me, and when my bare cock touches her, I let out a primal groan.

  “I’m about to embarrass myself. Tilly, I’m so sorry, but I’m not going to last long, baby. I promise I’ll make it up to you later.”

  “I don’t care about that. I just want you,” she assures, reaching up to take my hand in hers.

  “Condom?” I ask while I still have a little of my senses about me, surprisingly.

  She shakes her head. “You told me you haven’t been with anyone in a long time. I haven’t either. And you already know I can’t have…” she trails off, turning her head to the side.

  “Hey.” I pull her face back to look at me. “Don’t look away from me. We’ve waited too damn long to not be right here together. Stay here—right here—with me.”

  She nods as tears start to glisten in her eyes. Wanting to soothe any pain from her, I kiss up her body until her sounds of pleasure take over again. Ending at her mouth, I kiss her. I kiss her with all the words I can’t bring myself to say yet but can put into this one kiss.

  Pulling back, I look into her eyes as I nudge her center. I run my length up and down on her, slicking myself in her arousal and making us both go crazy. We’re both already panting, and I haven’t even been inside of her. I look down to where we’re touching before gripping my cock to line up with her entrance again.

  My eyes run back up her body , locking with hers as I push inside. I go as slowly as I can, my body shaking and her trembling below me. Once I’m all the way in, I pause and keep my eyes on hers. “You OK?” I ask, my voice shaking, my resolve crumbling.

  She nods. “Yes. Fuck, yes,” she moans as she rocks her hips ever so slightly, making my eyes shut from the pleasure of feeling her around me.

  I hold her hips still and look at her again as I pull back out and push back in, achingly slow. “Fuck,” I growl, pushing back inside of her. Not able to hold back any longer, I quickly pick up the pace and thrust faster, harder, deeper. Her back arches when I reach down to rub her sensitive flesh around my cock as it’s buried inside her.

  I don’t know what I want to watch more: her face as it twists in the pleasure I’m giving her, her beautifully bouncing tits as I move our bodies, or our union as I thrust in and out of her.

  “Tilly,” I groan, feeling my balls pull tight, needing to release. I really wanted to give her another orgasm before mine, but I might have to show off later. I try to slow my pace to hold off as I work her clit faster. Her moaning increases and she reaches to her nipples and twists them in her fingers, and it’s hot as fuck to watch her. I can’t hold back any longer, coming with a loud groan as I spill inside of her.

  Falling over her, I pant trying to catch my breath before rolling to the side and pulling her leg over mine. I push my fingers inside her for a second time, wanting to give her the second orgasm I just robbed her of. In seconds, she’s moaning her own release.

  I capture her lips with mine and swallow her moans, wanting to take all she is giving me right now. I want more of her. I want it all and then some.

  I’m already getting hard again. “You good to keep going?” I ask her, wanting more. I just had my first full taste of my cookie, and now I’m like a starved man.

  She smiles, and I pull the hair sticking to her sweat-lined skin. “Damn, Travis. I don’t know why you apologized earlier. I’m pretty sure you’re a unicorn.”

  I laugh. “Well, my horn is hard, and I’m ready to make you fly with me again.”

  “Oh, cheese!” she giggles.

  I soon turn her giggles into more moans when I turn her over, slap her ass, and pull her hips up to meet my waiting cock.

  After we shower together, she makes us dinner while we wash the sheets. I can’t keep my hands or lips off of her as the rest of the night plays out. We both fall asleep in a tangled web of limbs in her bed.

  It’s the best sleep I’ve had in fifteen years.

  It’s the first night I’ve slept with a woman in fifteen years.

  It’s the first night I held a woman while I slept in fifteen years.

  It’s the first morning I woke with a smile in fifteen years.

  And it was all because of Tilly Lane.

  TILLY

  Minutes After Sleeping with Travis

  Oh, I’m going to feel all of that in the morning.

  But, oh, will it be worth it.

  Travis Gellar is a fucking sex machine!

  And he’s mine.

  He is the sexiest man I’ve ever seen, been with, known.

  And he is just as sweet and caring as he is hot and sexy.

&n
bsp; I can’t believe he chose me.

  Am I actually going to get my happy ending?

  TRAVIS

  “Hey, you alright?” I ask Tilly as we walk into to our hotel room.

  We’re in Texas for Jesse’s graduation from basic training. We finished at the base and took him out to dinner. He and Penny haven’t spoken much since they left, but she wanted to come surprise him. Tilly and I just left them alone to talk. Lord knows they need to.

  She leans into my side more where we’re sitting on the bed together. “Yeah. It’s just so weird seeing him like this. So… responsible and structured,” she laughs.

  I chuckle with her. “It’s good for him.” I squeeze her, kissing her on the head. She’s been an emotional mess all day.

  “I miss him so much,” she sighs. “And Penny too. I didn’t realize how much I missed them and their crazy until we saw them together today. You think they’ll work out whatever they have going on?” she asks.

  I shrug. “I hope so. I think they’re both being stupid, but they need to do this their way.”

  “Hopefully they figure it out faster than we did,” she says, sounding exasperated.

  I tickle her side, making her laugh harder and harder until I’ve got her pinned under me on the bed. “It’s been so hard not to touch you how I want since they’ve been around. I’ll be glad to say goodbye.”

  “Travis!” she yells, hitting my shoulder.

  “What? Not like you haven’t thought about having my face between your legs since we left yesterday.”

  “I didn’t say that,” she grumbles.

  I kiss her neck, laughing as I do. We just start kissing more and more when we hear someone at the door. I jump up and grab a pillow to put on my lap to conceal my erection as Tilly sits next to me, with more space than I’d like.

  One look at my daughter’s face has my mood instantly changing. “Oh, baby girl, what happened?” I ask, patting the space between Tilly and me for her to sit.

  Kicking off her shoes, she climbs between us on the bed, leaning her head on my shoulder.

  “You wanna talk about it?” I ask her.

  “Nope,” she answers shortly. She’s like me when she’s upset. She clams up, needing to work it out on her own.

  I hand her the TV remote. She flips through the channels until she finds something she likes… Friends reruns.

  My brows furrow at first, and I think Tilly notices. I give her a wink and a reassuring smile, but I don’t feel so sure in this moment.

  Wrapping an arm around Penny, I pull her in for a hug and kiss the crown of her head. “Love you, LP.”

  “Love you too, Daddy.”

  Tilly smiles at us with tears shining in her eyes.

  Please don’t let me ruin this.

  Chapter 17

  Travis

  Sixteen Years After Josie

  The race season for Penny is almost finished, which means she’ll be back home in Graves and under my roof again soon. I miss my little girl, even if she isn’t so little anymore.

  But. I also have to admit that days like today, when Tilly and I can lie in bed together and not have to worry about anyone walking in or seeing us are pretty great. We’ve found a good routine with each other, but soon it’ll all be over and we’ll be back to sneaking around.

  As much as I don’t like sneaking around with Tilly and hiding what we have from everyone, I’m not ready to hear what they’ll say about it. I like when it’s just us in the nice little cocoon we’ve formed together.

  I feel wetness on my chest where Tilly’s head is resting as we lie here in silence, listening to the rain outside.

  “Cookie, you alright?” I ask, grabbing her chin to tilt her face up so I can look at her. When I do, I see the tears swimming there. “What’s wrong?”

  She buries her face in her hands, leaning back down against my chest. Sobs fall from her, making her sound like she’s in anguish, and I hate that I don’t know what’s wrong or how to help her right now.

  I run my hands up and down her back and arms, trying to soothe her as best I can, letting her cry as much as she needs to, hoping that it isn’t anything I did. I’d never want to hurt her in any way, and maybe all the hiding is catching up to her and she doesn’t want this anymore.

  When my thoughts are at the worst possible scenario, she sits up and smooths back her hair, wiping the tears from her face. “I’m sorry,” she whispers, sounding embarrassed.

  “You have nothing to be sorry for. Talk to me,” I urge, pulling her back to me so I can wrap my arms around her.

  “Today, my baby would be thirty years old. Can you believe that? I’d have a full-blown adult child. I’d have a son the same age as Tatum. Maybe have grandkids by now. Maybe more, if you count the children who could have come from that single life. I let it go all so selfishly. How could I do that?” she asks on a mournful whisper.

  I press a kiss to her head and hug her tighter, knowing she needs to feel loved and cared for right now.

  “I can’t begin to understand everything you were feeling that day,” I start, and she tenses in my arms. “But, look at the second chance you got with Jesse. He doesn’t look much like you, so if you and your sister looked alike, I have to think he looks like his father. You’ve treated him as your own since the day he got here. I’m sure that was hard at times to look at him and wonder what his brother would look like or act like. You could have been angry and taken all of your hurt and pain and resentment out on him, but you didn’t. You chose to love him and care for him and raise him to be an incredible man. You can’t change the past, but you can look to the future. You can see where life will take Jesse. Watch him as he serves his country, marries, becomes a father, provides for his family as a respectable man because you taught him how. That’s what you should be focusing on. Not the ugliness of the past that can’t be changed.”

  She shifts to look at me, tears still shining in her eyes, but she doesn’t look so pained now. “Thank you.”

  My lips find hers and I kiss her, wanting to take any more pain that might still be weighing on her. I want to swallow it all down and hold it inside so she doesn’t feel that anymore.

  “I love you,” she whispers across my lips. I freeze, not knowing what to say. “You don’t have to say anything, but I can’t hold it in anymore.” She sits up further and looks deep into my eyes until I feel her reaching inside me and grabbing my heart. “I love you, Travis.”

  Pulling her into me again, I crash my lips to hers. I show her how I feel about her in the only way I know how right now. Responding to her words the only way my mind and body will allow.

  What started as a soft and seductive kiss quickly turns deep and passionate. My whole body is on fire from her words and how they impacted me. Flipping her to her back, I lay over her and devour every part of her skin with my lips, hoping she understands what each kiss represents. That each press of my lips is one closer to me admitting my love for her.

  I start to make love to Tilly. As much as I wish I could say those words back to her, I just can’t. Not yet. No matter how much I care about her. And I do. So, I make love to her. This time it isn’t just sex. It’s not fucking. It’s more than the sexual tension between us being fulfilled. No, this time, I love her body and hope it reaches into her heart and soul and shows her. I hope she understands what I’m telling her without words.

  TILLY

  Minutes After Travis Makes Love to Me

  I knew telling Travis I loved him would change things. I wasn’t lying when I told him I didn’t expect him to say it back to me. I know each change in our relationship is hard for him. What he told me without words was better. He made love to me, and I felt every ounce of his love pour out of him.

  Travis Gellar has loved me longer than he’ll ever admit, but I’d wait an eternity to hear those words leave his lips. In the meantime, I’ll let him tell me any way he’s able to because it still feels like more than I deserve.

  TRAVIS

  E
ach year that Tilly and I get closer, things shift and change. Not just between us, but inside me. With how I view my life now without Josie, with how I picture my future, with making a life with someone else. I don’t know how. But I know I’m getting closer and closer to being ready to give Tilly all of me.

  I chuckle to myself when I pull out a letter I’ve been dreading and have put off reading for a while. “Get Jiggy Wit It” is written on the unopened envelope. It’s a strange thing to read words from your wife telling you to get it on with another woman. I’ve avoided this letter since Tilly and I first started sleeping together. I couldn’t bring myself to read it, but now, after the other day of making love to Cookie, it’s time.

  Please tell me you’re singing Will Smith right now! If you aren’t, it’s a good thing I’m not there because I’d pummel your cute ass!

  OK, now are you?

  Travis! Sing the damn song!

  I laugh and put the paper down and start singing the stupid song, or at least the little bit of it I know. “Fuck, Josie, what are you doing to me, pretty girl?” I ask the empty room, laying my head back with a smile before I keep reading.

  Thank you! Now, we can continue…

  So, since you’re reading this, I’m guessing you are either about to or already have. (Bleh! I just puked a little in my mouth.) I know you’re probably missing me and all my jiggly bits. I mean, how could you not? BUT, I’m glad you’re getting some. Whoever she is, she’s pretty lucky too, because you are exceptional. Just saying.

  If you thought this was going to be me giving your pointers, you are greatly mistaken. What I am going to say is, go forth and prosper. Gosh, this is weird… Maybe I’ll throw this one out… You’re hot and young and a man and can fuck like a lion. Go do it! Literally. No shame, baby. Go get yours!