No Love Lost

by Lynn Bulock

  “So fill in the rest of us on what happened with the two of you so far. Linnette certainly didn’t tell us anything,” Paula said, stirring her coffee. She’s a slight Asian woman whose job as a Realtor means she’s usually dressed to the nines and on her cell phone closing a deal. Paula and I didn’t always see eye-to-eye with each other but today she looked genuinely concerned.

  I fortified myself with the rest of a cookie and a few sips of my coffee, then told the group what had been going on since Friday night. Lexy stayed silent until I got to the part about Nicole still being missing last night. “So in the middle of everything with Ben you drove him over to Hal’s place and back?”

  “Going to Hal’s place was the only way to have Ben’s father participate in the discussion. And this was one of those situations where we needed to be together.”

  “And did he say what you expected him to say?” I didn’t know quite where Lexy was going with this but there was no point in not answering. Besides, my friend the entertainment lawyer always wore one of those expressions that made me want to answer her questions. How anybody could combine the looks of blond cheerleader and a legal shark like Alexis Adams did was beyond me. She pulled it off, though. Someday I want to see her in a courtroom.

  “He said about what I should have expected. That doesn’t mean it was what I wanted him to say. He tried to talk Ben out of this engagement but for all the wrong reasons.”

  “Then what are the right reasons?” Heather asked quietly. Of everyone there I would have expected her to back me up the most. As a single mom following a disastrous engagement to my late husband, I thought she would be on my side. Especially since she taught people Ben and Cai Li’s age at the local community college. Today she let me down. “And couldn’t there be as many right reasons why Ben and his girlfriend should be engaged?”

  “But they’re so young. And there are so many other things they should be doing instead.” I tried not to sound too strident. It gave me a start to realize how much I sounded like my mother had twenty years ago when she’d tried to argue me out of marrying Hal.

  “Let me ask you a question, and take a moment to think about the answer first. Are all those things you think they should be doing things they couldn’t do while engaged to each other?” Dot tilted her head, ready to listen just like everyone’s favorite silver-haired aunt. With her sparkling eyes questioning me over the half-glasses she wore for reading, I felt as though my books were overdue at the library.

  I did as she’d asked and thought about things. My heart sank as I considered my answer. “Not all of them. I want Ben to finish school, and for that matter I’d want anybody he married to finish school if that was what she intended to do. These days there aren’t many worthwhile jobs that don’t need a college degree.”

  “Or more.” Lexy piped up, reminding us all of her extra three years to get that law degree. “Steve and I waited until after we finished law school to get married, but I don’t know if that was the best idea.” Her expression told me she was reminded of their problems having a baby—problems that probably weren’t helped by waiting until their late twenties to marry and even later to start a family. After four years of trying to have a baby, Lexy still yearned for a child.

  “Okay, maybe some of you have a point. There are still so many questions I want to ask somebody. I want to make sure they really think this through. And they’re both scholarship students.”

  Paula made a sour face. “Well, I’d hope a Christian school that preached purity outside marriage would welcome their scholarship students marrying. It wouldn’t make much sense otherwise. If they have penalties for getting married while in school, they don’t know young people very well.”

  She had a point. This whole conversation had been nearly the reverse of what I’d expected. Paula appeared to be on the same wavelength I was on, Lexy and Heather seemed to be arguing for early marriage, and Linnette limited her activity to pouring coffee. At least nobody voiced speculations about the kids’ reasons for marriage as Hal had started to. But then, everyone here knew both of them; many of the group saw Cai Li lead the contemporary praise band every Sunday.

  We sat in silence for a little while, several people concentrating on cookies. Paula set down her coffee cup. “Okay then, if that’s anywhere near settled, I want to hear about the runaway bride,” she piped up. Now this sounded more like the Paula I knew and loved as a sister in Christ even when she drove me crazy. I didn’t have to like Paula Choi all the time, but I did have to try and love her. Someday perhaps I will understand the mystery of God’s sense of humor on instructions like that one, but today isn’t the day.

  Why are so many people out there that are prickly so difficult to love? And why did those folks seem to show up in my life in bunches? Maybe there would be a phone message on my machine when we got home from church that would alleviate one difficult bunch of people from my life. I really hoped that Nicole had made her way home overnight. It still might be an uncomfortable sort of wedding after the bride going AWOL for a little while, but at least I’d have a lot less contact with Hal and his family in the next two weeks.

  Despite my wishes, I got home and the machine just wasn’t blinking. Hope springs eternal, though, and by noon I’d convinced myself that Hal must be so busy now that Nicole returned that he had no time to call.

  Of course when I called, that didn’t seem to be the case. Hal still sounded panicky and stressed as he told me Nicole was still missing. “Did you sleep at all?” I asked him.

  “A little. On the sofa.” The mental picture I formed of my lanky ex-husband on the sofa I’d seen yesterday made me think that he must be awfully sore by now.

  “Have you filed a missing person’s report?”

  There was silence for a while. “Not yet. Ellie thinks it’s a bad idea.”

  “Why would that be a bad idea? Doesn’t she want to find Nicole as quickly as possible?”

  Hal sighed. “I’m beginning to wonder. She’s more worried about the embarrassment if the report became public than looking for Nicole right away. Besides, I’m not sure how to do this.”

  The implication appeared to be that I did know how to file a missing person’s report. I held my breath, trying to convince myself that I should just be quiet and let Hal come right out and ask for what he wanted instead of hinting. Still, I had an idea how to file the report, having intended to file one when my former mother-in-law, Edna Peete, went missing after her son’s murder. That time I’d stepped back and let her blood relatives do the filing instead, which turned out to be a bad idea. If I’d pushed ahead and reported her missing right away, things might have turned out differently.

  Remembering that mistake made me change my mind about helping Hal. “Let me hang up and make a few calls. In about twenty minutes I can probably tell you what to do.”

  “Thanks, Gracie Lee. I owe you one.” The relief in his voice was palpable. Temptation to tell him to work off his debt by talking to his son at length rose instantly but I pushed it away. No matter what went on with Nicole and Hal, Ben and I would more than likely be the ones to work out our own problems. His father’s tendency to avoid serious issues had been a problem when we divorced, and nothing had changed on that front.

  Before I could voice any of these thoughts Hal had hung up. Calling Ray would be more pleasant than listening to Hal anyway.

  Surprisingly, Ray picked up his cell phone after only two rings. “Hey, there. Tell me you missed me so much you just had to call to say hello.”

  I sighed. “Hi, Ray. I do miss you. And I do want to say hello.”

  “Aha. But I bet there’s more.”

  “You are getting to know me way too well, mister.”

  He laughed. “Not nearly well enough for my tastes. But I won’t start that argument now. What’s on your mind, Gracie?”

  “How do I file a missing person’s report? No, wait, before you worry, let me rephrase that. How does somebody file a missing person’s report?”

&nb
sp; “Good. I’m glad it’s not Ben you’re asking about. Tell me it’s not something to do with Linnette.”

  That made me smile. It felt good that Ray showed that much concern for a mutual friend. “You can breathe easy. Linnette’s fine and Ben’s been home about twenty-four hours. Now, he thinks he’s engaged, but that’s a story for when we get together.”

  “Aw, you can’t spring that on me and not expect me to want to see you now. Coffee at Starbucks?”

  “Sure. Which one of the seven locations between your house and mine should we choose?” He picked one, told me to give him half an hour and I hung up to get ready myself. Seeing Ray required a bit better attire than the shorts I’d changed into after church.

  While still getting ready I realized I hadn’t gotten a firm answer on how to file the report. I hesitated calling Hal back, because I knew he was waiting for a phone call, just not mine. Once I talked to Ray, I’d call him back and let him know what he needed to do. It was time that Ellie got over her qualms and took some action, or at least let Hal take some instead.

  *

  Telling Ray about Ben’s weekend was almost as unsatisfactory as telling the Christian Friends at church. He let me talk for quite a while, not interrupting but just sipping his Americano. Despite wearing a bit of a frown while he listened he looked as gorgeous as ever. Instead of his usual work “uniform” of jeans and a sport coat with a white shirt, he had on khakis and a nice short-sleeved silk shirt in a tan-and-green print that accentuated the slight hazel tint to his golden-brown eyes. He’d settled me at the table with a kiss on the cheek and gotten our drinks before he sat down.

  Mine was still largely full in front of me, the ice beginning to melt in my latte. While I seldom drank fancy coffee drinks at work at the Coffee Corner, I enjoyed them when somebody else made them. Once I finished telling Ray about Ben and Cai Li, with verbal detours to explain what was going on with Hal and Nicole, and what my friends had said this morning, I ran out of steam. Sipping the cool drink, I waited to hear what he’d say.

  “Wow. That’s a lot of information to digest at one time. And I hardly know what to tell you about Ben. Not having any kids myself, I don’t know that I can make any pronouncements on somebody else’s. I mean, he seems like a mature, solid kind of kid “

  “Whom you suspected was capable of murder just last fall,” I put in, knowing it wouldn’t earn me any points but still having to say it anyway. Suspecting Ben when Dot’s contractor cousin was murdered during our apartment remodeling job was the one thing I held against Fernandez, and probably would for some time to come.

  “I didn’t suspect him seriously for any length of time, if you’ll remember. You have to know that I was almost as relieved as you were when it turned out he wasn’t a suspect. But he was close to the scene of the crime, and fit the description I had.” If Ray ever gave up police work, he could definitely make it as a lawyer or a college lecturer, the man was so infallibly logical.

  “But you did suspect him. And now you’re saying that he’s solid and mature. He’s also not quite nineteen.”

  “Hey, when I was not quite nineteen I was almost finished with my associate’s degree in criminal justice and on my way to the police academy as soon as they’d have me. If you would have asked me then, I’d have said I was ready to get married.” His smile said he meant it, too.

  “Yes, but you would have had the same problems Ben does now. No job, no place to live unless you wanted to bunk in with family, and dramatically lowered prospects to improve your situation unless one of you quit school and went to work.”

  “Wow, you’ve really thought this through, haven’t you.” He looked more serious now.

  “I’ve thought it through because it’s so familiar. I’ve lived it, Ray. And the last thing I want for my son is for him to make the same mistakes that his dad and I did.” I fought back tears now, stinging behind my eyelids in equal parts of anger and frustration.

  “Hey, nobody makes the exact same mistakes their parents make. They may make similar mistakes that are just as painful, but every generation puts its own unique stamp on their mistakes.”

  “Now that sounds like the voice of experience, too,” I said, drawn away from my own problems for a moment.

  “Yeah, kind of. I didn’t make the same mistakes my parents made, but I’ve made some dandies. And to add to my own mistakes, in my line of work I see just about everybody’s worst decisions. Nobody involves the Major Crimes Division because they made a good choice in life.” He looked sad enough that I reached over and squeezed his hand.

  “And that would lead us into our next topic of conversation. How does Hal file a missing person’s report on his fiancée if she went to her bachelorette party and never came home?”

  He grimaced. “Running away would be a particularly costly mistake, unless your ex is a lot worse than you’ve indicated. Has he already talked to the people she went out with?”

  “Both of her bridesmaids say she got in her car about one and left. And her car is back at the house, so technically she came home but just didn’t stay there.”

  “Has Hal talked to her family? Maybe they know something.”

  I shook my head. “No, and her mom and sister have already come for the wedding and are giving Hal grief about filing a report. Can he do it if they object?”

  “If she’s an adult who’s capable of looking after herself, they can’t do much about it. He’d have as much right as they would to file the report. Why would they object, anyway?”

  “I think they’re afraid that somehow somebody will catch wind of this and then Nicole will slink home and be embarrassed by it all.”

  Ray made a sound that was remarkably like a growl. It certainly didn’t sound like approval. “More likely they’re afraid of embarrassment themselves. And if her dad’s paying for some elaborate wedding, he’s probably blowing a gasket by now.”

  That made me stop for a moment. “He’s the one person in this whole mess who I haven’t seen. Nobody says much about him, even. I know her mom isn’t widowed or divorced, but where Mr. Barnes is, I have no idea.”

  “He’s probably in the entertainment business somehow then, or a doctor. Or maybe he’s part of my favorite profession, a lawyer. Something too busy to be bothered with the details of a daughter’s wedding, anyway.”

  Ray was probably right. I made a mental note to ask Hal more about Nicole’s dad. For that matter Ben probably knew far more than I did. Ray took another drink of his cooling coffee, which probably had reached a temperature by now where I would have insisted that it get warmed up or put over ice, one or the other. How anybody drinks lukewarm coffee is beyond me, but Fernandez says he’s so used to bad police department coffee that he’ll drink better stuff at any temperature he can get it.

  “So, filing a missing persons report, huh? First off, what you think you know about it is probably wrong.”

  I know I bristled a little. “Now why assume that?”

  “Don’t get huffy. Let me ask one question and see if you answer it right. If you do, go ahead and chew me out.” I nodded agreement, not trusting myself to say much. “Okay, if you’re filing on a voluntary missing adult like Nicole, how long do you have to wait?”

  I tried not to look smug. “Twenty-four hours, right?”

  He grinned. “Wrong. You’ve been watching too much TV again, Gracie. There’s no waiting period anymore. If you’re sure someone close to you is missing, you call the department dispatcher and she or he will send a patrol car, right then.”

  Okay, he had me there. “So when I woke up yesterday morning and found Ben’s bed empty, I could have filed a report then?”

  “You could have, not that it would have made you real popular with your son.” Ray looked at his watch.

  “Do you have to do a night shift or something?” He hardly ever checked the time when we were together.

  “No, just dinner at my mom’s.” His smile was a bit weak. “I’d ask you to join me, but I don’t want
to get her hopes up. I’m old enough that if I take somebody to Mom’s for dinner we better be talking about what to name the kids, or at least whether she prefers gold or platinum jewelry.” The warm gaze that met mine had volumes of questions, almost all of which I wasn’t ready to answer.

  We talked for a few more minutes, he walked me to my car with a brief but warm hug and he drove away. I got into my car and sat in the parking lot for a minute, pondering my own long-term goals before I called Hal to tell him how to solve his short-term problem. In the end I decided I had too much to tell him, and pointed the car in the direction of Tuscany Hills one more time.

  SIX

  Halfway to Hal’s my phone rang, and for a change I answered it in the car. Usually it takes an emergency for me to talk and drive at the same time, and I have a real problem with folks who do. When I saw that it was Hal I breathed a silent prayer that maybe Nicole had ended the drama and come home.

  “Hal? Is she home?” I asked, trying to focus as much as I could on the road and not the phone and still listen to him while I drove.

  “No. And you didn’t call me back. No matter what Ellie says, I’m going to report Nicole missing.”

  “That’s probably a good idea, as long as she’s been gone. All you need to do is call the regular number for Ventura County Sheriff’s Department, not 9–1–1, and Ray says they’ll dispatch a patrol unit to your house as soon as possible.”

  “Okay. For a change having you date somebody in law enforcement is a plus. I’ll let you know when they’ve taken my report and I know something. Thanks, Gracie Lee.”

  I felt a wave of relief. “Does this mean you don’t want me to come over?”

  “Not now, at least. If anything happens, I’ll call, okay? Right now I’ve got enough women to deal with as is, and sometime in the next two hours I’ll add my mother to the mix.” We said our goodbyes and I closed the phone, not anxious at all to go over there now. Dealing with Lillian has never been my favorite sport. Watching her take on Ellie Barnes could get rather ugly.