Tempting Sydney

by Corbett, Angela

  My hurt quickly morphed into anger. “This is another one of your deflecting mechanisms. You’re not ready to deal with your own issues, so you turn things around and make other people feel bad instead. You get pissed at the revelations about yourself, and deal with it by making snarky comments—downright rude in some cases—to push people away so you don’t have to face the hard shit.” I turned on my heel and shoved the car door open. This hadn’t gone as expected, and had definitely taken a horrible turn from the potential angry sex. Angry sex was the last thing on my mind. I couldn’t even stand to be in the same air space with Jax for one more minute. “Well, congratulations. You’ve accomplished your goal. Consider me effectively pushed out of your life. I hope I don’t see you around. Ever.”

  I slammed the car into gear and left a good amount of tire tread on Red’s concrete. I refused to look in the rearview mirror to see if Jax was watching me. I couldn’t handle it if he was, and I definitely couldn’t handle it if he wasn’t. I took a heaving breath, and almost made it to the end of the street before I started crying.

  I’d spent a long time in my room that night nursing my tears, and then drowned my sorrows in romantic comedies, chocolate, and french fries. I’d told Brynn what Jax said, including Jax’s accusations and my secret fears. Like a good best friend, she’d tried to make me feel better and said I absolutely wouldn’t end up alone with a house full of animals. I wanted to believe her, but wasn’t sure if I could. Still, she’d been pretty pissed that Jax had hurt my feelings. She said she’d go over and twist his balls off, but that seemed a little extreme. It did make me feel better that she’d offered, however, and I knew who to go to if I ever needed any ball torture done. With her research skills, I felt like she’d probably excel at knowing exactly what would cause pain in that area.

  The sulking had lasted all night and most of the morning…until Brynn mentioned a Halloween party at Ice—a bar in town. I desperately needed to blow off some steam, and let’s be honest, after Jax’s breakdown of what he clearly thought was my pathetic life, I now felt like I had something to prove. Maybe he was right, and maybe that’s why I felt so bad. I’d decided to take charge and make some changes. My goals were still important to me, but I could reach my potential and experience life, too. If my Halloween costume was any indication, my first experience would be a draft around my rear area, and the threat of catching a cold.

  “Where in hell did you get this costume?” I asked Brynn, pulling down my skirt. I hadn’t worn something this short since I was a toddler.

  She shrugged. “I thought you’d like it! It matches your car!”

  She was right about that. The She-Ra costume was pretty authentic, complete with a white dress that fell a few inches below my ass, a gold belt, gold feather-like head band, gold lace-up boots, and a red cape. Thank the goddesses for the cape. It was the only thing keeping my butt cheeks off display. Oh, and there was a plastic sword. I really liked the sword.

  Brynn, who promoted ass displaying as often as possible, used the Halloween holiday as an excuse to wear a mostly see-through red and black corset with frilly red panties in public. Someone asked her what she was and her response was, “Sexy.” That pretty much summed it up. Halloween wasn’t about authenticity or actual costumes for Brynn, it was about attracting the biggest specimen for research.

  Ice was full of college students dressed in every costume imaginable. Well, most of the girls were dressed up, but not as many of the guys. And in general, most of the girls had taken Brynn’s approach to costume picking, and just grabbed something from their lingerie drawer instead of something with a meaning. I was glad Brynn knew me well enough to pick a costume that mattered instead of another corset and panty pair. I was open to being a little more spontaneous and having more fun, but I drew the line at wearing lingerie in public.

  We walked into the dark club, bright lights pulsating as music pounded and bodies flailed around the dance floor. Everything in Ice looked like ice. Decorated in hues of light blue and white, there was an entire wall of water. The wall must have been cooled because as water ran over it, it created an ice formation that was actually really pretty. We were sitting on light blue benches when the server came. Brynn quickly ordered something with enough alcohol to disinfect several wounds. The server turned to me, “What do you feel like, sugar?”

  Maybe it was the “sugar,” or it maybe it was Jax’s words about me being too uptight to have any fun running through my head. But I did something I hadn’t done since sophomore year of undergrad. I ordered a mixed drink. Brynn’s mouth dropped so far that I actually looked around to see what she was so surprised at.

  “You’re drinking?” she asked as the server left.

  “You bet I am.”

  She stared at me like I’d just grown two heads. “Are you sure that’s a good idea? You haven’t had hard liquor in years. You can barely handle a glass of champagne on New Year’s Eve.”

  I waved her off. “You’re overreacting. I’ll be fine. I just want to have a little fun.”

  We sipped our drinks, got up to dance, and came back to drink some more. I’d never enjoyed being dry-humped so much in my life. So this was what it was like to be Brynn. To have fun and not worry about the next test, or how grades during the first year of law school were more important than any other year, since law firms recruit during second year and are most interested in students who finished top of their class in year one.

  The alcohol warmed and calmed me in a way I hadn’t been relaxed in years. I took another sip of my yummy fruity drink—the good kind that are so sweet you can’t even tell how much alcohol is in them. I gazed out across the room and noticed a guy who looked a bit like Jax. That pissed me off. And I didn’t want to be pissed. Drinks were fun! I was having fun! And I was not going to end up alone with only a dog as a companion. Nope. Nope. Nope. I was going to start letting loose, and Jackson West could go to hell.

  “Hey, hot stuff,” Collin said, coming over and smacking Brynn on the ass. There were so many panty frills in his way that I doubted she could even feel it. Collin was wearing a giant cow costume, complete with udders hanging in the area around his waist.

  “What’s with the cow costume?” I asked. “Sudden interest in farm animals—not that it would surprise me.”

  He grinned. “Asking a girl to milk me is a great conversation starter.”

  Brynn thought that was hilarious. She was also probably drunk. I might be a little bit drunk, too.

  “That’s so stupid,” I said, taking another drink.

  “What? It helps me see their technique so I don’t waste my time with girls who have no clue.”

  I rolled my eyes. No wonder he and Brynn kept each other around for booty calls. They shared similar completely inappropriate methods when it came to picking partners. “I can’t believe you’ve been successful getting a woman to even talk to you, let alone take her clothes off for you.”

  His lips curled up. “Believe it, baby.”

  “‘Baby’ from you always sounds wrong, but it sounds even worse when you’re using your cow costume as a sexual audition.”

  He came over and started giving me a cow lap dance. I pushed him off, mildly amused by it. Collin was funny, I’d give him that. Funny, but annoying.

  One of Brynn’s favorite songs came on and she got up, shaking her hips and ass as she curved her index finger at Collin in a ‘come here’ motion. He was up before she even had to pull out her “screw me” eyes. She gave me the same finger wiggle. I laughed, and followed her and Collin onto the dance floor.

  We were dancing in a big group, though I was mostly focused on Brynn—like most of the guys dancing around us. I was so caught up in the moment, that I wasn’t paying attention to anything but having fun. Collin was an ass, but I knew he and his friends wouldn’t let anything happen to me or Brynn. I felt safe with them, unlike our previous club experience with the strangers Brynn had picked up.

  We repeated the cycle of dancing, taking a bre
ak for drinks, and dancing again for hours. I felt a little light headed, but nothing too crazy, and I’d been alternating my mixed drinks with water so I wouldn’t have the hangover from hell in the morning. By last call, I was sweaty, exhausted, and didn’t have a care in the world. It felt fantastic!

  Brynn and I walked out to She-Ra. She stumbled, but Collin held her up and helped her into the car. “Are you sure you’re okay to drive?” Collin asked me.

  “Drive?” I said, “Oh yeah! I’m totally fine!” Even as I said it, I felt a little fuzzy. Maybe I’d had more alcohol than I thought. Driving probably wouldn’t be good. We probably needed a cab instead. I started digging through my purse for my phone. I could find a cab company there. My head was down, so I didn’t see it coming.

  And by it, I mean Jax’s fist. It slammed into the side of Collin’s face so hard that I actually heard cracking. What the…?

  “What the hell are you doing?” I yelled, pushing Jax. His sudden appearance was a shock, and his attitude was helping to clear my mind of the alcoholic haze.

  “Stopping you from making a huge mistake,” he said. Collin was rolling on the ground, writhing in pain. Jax turned to me, grabbing my purse. He reached inside and found my keys, palming them into his pocket. “Get in my truck.”

  I was leaning down, checking on Collin. “Who the hell do you think you are? You get in your truck, and leave me alone! And give me my damn keys back!”

  His eyes were blazing with fury. “There’s no way in hell that’s happening. You won’t be getting your keys until you can stand, and see, straight.”

  Collin sat up, rubbing his jaw. “That hurt, man!”

  “You were about to let two drunk women drive home. I hope to hell it hurt, and if I could make it hurt worse, I would.”

  “I wasn’t about to drive, you asshole!” I shouted. “I know I had too much to drink. I was looking for my phone to call a cab.”

  Surprise crossed Jax’s face, and then something that looked like relief. “Well, now I’m here. It will save you the cab fare.”

  “We don’t need your help.” I wasn’t in the mood to argue with him. We’d had a rough couple of weeks, and I didn’t imagine spending any time together would make things better. And riding home with him when I was drunk and more likely to speak my mind was an even worse plan. No. That wasn’t happening. I looked around and noticed a few idling cabs at the front of the club that I hadn’t seen before. “Will you help me get Brynn, Collin?”

  He stood up, moving his jaw back and forth. It would probably be sore, but it looked okay. Collin lifted Brynn out of She-Ra, and then I locked the car and set the alarm. I didn’t like leaving my car in a parking lot in the middle of town on a weekend, but I didn’t have another choice. We started walking toward the waiting cabs.

  “Where are you going?” Jax asked, falling into step next to me. He still looked angry, but he seemed to be maintaining a semblance of control.

  “To get a cab, you jerk.”

  “I told you, I’m taking you home.”

  We got to the cab and Collin opened the back door, helping Brynn inside. “And I told you I don’t need your help.”

  He scrubbed a hand over his face. “Going out to a club and getting drunk like a teenager was really mature.”

  I laughed outright. “You’re the one who told me I needed to stop being so uptight. Remember?”

  His expression went rigid. “I didn’t mean do something that could have gotten you killed.”

  Lines formed across my forehead. “That’s kind of a worst case scenario, don’t you think? I didn’t drive. I just didn’t realize how much I had to drink until we got out of the club. When I did, I was going to call a cab until you came over and assaulted my friend.”

  He pressed his lips into a thin line.

  “What the hell is your problem?” I yelled. “You won’t open up to me, you haven’t contacted me in weeks, and you have a wife and a love-child! Why don’t you go be with them and leave me alone!”

  His brow pinched in confusion. “Wife? Love-child? What in the world are you talking about?”

  “The model and kid you were sitting with at the pizza place!” I yelled. “You didn’t even call to explain why you’d decided to use me to cheat on her, and at Red’s you refused to answer my question about her. You’re a douchebag of the highest order, Jackson West. And you can go to hell!”

  I pushed Collin out of the way and got in the backseat of the cab. I was about to tell the cab driver our address, but Jax leaned down through the passenger seat window and told him instead, then handed him twenty bucks. He looked back at me, holding my gaze, his expression full of determination. “This isn’t over,” he said, then backed away and the cab took off.

  I spent the next morning nursing a wicked hangover. The water trick hadn’t helped as much as I thought it would. Brynn, who was used to this kind of liquor consumption, recovered much better than me, and brought some special hangover cure potion to my bedroom. I nursed the unpleasant tasting drink for a couple of hours, but it did the trick. By mid-morning, my head and stomach were feeling significantly better; my heart was another issue entirely.

  Jax had been at Ice. How did he even know I was going to be there? It seemed a pretty big coincidence for him to show up out of the blue at the same club as me. Maybe that’s all it was, though, a coincidence.

  After my shower, I made my way down to the kitchen and found Brynn sitting at the table with her laptop and books. It was rare to see her actually doing homework. “There’s a mocha coffee from your favorite café . You might need to warm it up.”

  “Thanks,” I mumbled. I grabbed the coffee cup off the table and put it in the microwave. It came out piping hot and perfect. I sipped it as I crossed my legs under me in the chair across from Brynn. “Thanks for the coffee.” I was grateful one of us was capable of functioning this morning, and considering how much Brynn had to drink, it probably shouldn’t have been her. Then again, I wasn’t actually sure how much I’d had to drink.

  “Don’t thank me,” Brynn said, highlighting something in her textbook. “Thank your boyfriend.”

  I furrowed my brow. “What boyfriend?”

  She gave me an exasperated look. “Jax. He was outside this morning and brought us breakfast. He sat there all night.”

  No. Way. “He did not.”

  She nodded her head. “He did.”

  I couldn’t believe he’d really sat outside like some sort of security guard. What? Was he afraid I was going to try to walk back to Ice and get my car? “What the hell? Why?”

  “Because he’s in love with you. Why else?”

  I rolled my eyes. No. He wasn’t. He had a wife and child. “That’s ridiculous. He does not love me. He doesn’t even like me.”

  She looked up at me from under her brow. “Listen, I love you, but if you really think that, you’re a complete idiot.”

  I scowled at her. “Are you forgetting about the woman and kid at the pizza parlor?”

  She shook her head, grabbing a piece of dried fruit from a bag on the table and popping it in her mouth. “You’re making assumptions. You have no clue who they were.”

  “I’ve asked him about it twice now, and twice he’s refused to explain. I’m pretty sure that means it’s someone he doesn’t want me to know.”

  Brynn frowned. “I don’t think he’s the type to have a kid and leave them high and dry. He seems overly cautious and responsible…like he’s constantly looking out for people—including us. He wouldn’t bareback it. I bet he has a Costco sized box of condoms.”

  I took another sip of the delicious coffee. Not too bitter, or sweet—perfect. “You know, the other day when he hurt my feelings, you offered to twist his balls off. Now you’re defending him,” I pointed out.

  “Because he made you feel bad. But that doesn’t mean he’s a bad guy, it just means he made a mistake.”

  “So now you suddenly think you know him?”

  “Better than I did when we met
him in August.”

  I shook my head, lips tight. “No, you don’t. That’s the trick. He keeps everyone at arms-length and doesn’t let anyone get close. No one knows Jackson West. Not me, you, or anyone else.”

  She paused and took a drink of her detox lemon water. She set the glass down slowly and said nothing for a while, like she was using the time to collect her thoughts. She rested her arms on the table, folded over each other, and looked at me. “I’ve watched you with him on a couple of occasions, Syd. I’ve seen how you’ve changed because of him, and I think he’s been changing, too. Do you really think he’d be so protective of you if he didn’t have feelings for you? He cares about you, and the things that are important to you—me included. Honestly, of everyone who has ever been in his life, I think you were getting the closest to knowing him.”

  I stared at her, dumbfounded. “That’s ridiculous. I told you what happened on the fall drive, and then at Red’s garage. He doesn’t want anyone to know him. He won’t open up enough.”

  “He wanted to get to know you. He was seeing if you’d be vulnerable first. I think he’d started to open up with you—“

  I gave a derisive snort.

  “—or at least, he was trying. When you’ve been one way for most of your life, it’s difficult to immediately change—especially when it’s something that’s ingrained in your psyche, and has become such a big part of who you are as a person. You should understand that more than anyone. You’re trying to change and become—“ she paused, searching for the word, “more spontaneous. It hasn’t been easy for you, and it probably won’t be easy in the near future. You have to understand how hard this is for him, Syd. You’re asking for a lot more than some personal information. You’re asking for the key to who he is. I get the feeling it’s not a key he gives many people—if anyone.”

  I stared at her for a long time. Something was up…and I thought I might know what it was. “Is this you playing psychotherapist, or is this something he told you while he was hanging out on our front porch delivering coffee and apologies this morning?”