Lessons of the Heart

by Jodie Larson

  “Sweetheart, this is amazing. Full academic scholarships? Wow, I just can’t even put this into words. I’m so proud of you.” Our lips touch and a tingle runs through my body.

  When we pull back, we’re both smiling like idiots. “Sorry to drag you out of the house when it’s snowing like this but I needed to tell you in person. I couldn’t wait until tomorrow.”

  James moves his hand to the back of my neck, pulling my body closer to his. Our feet intertwine and I cling to his shoulders, not willing to let him go.

  “You know I would do anything for you. Your happiness is my happiness. Your pain is my pain.” James kisses me gently and I sigh. He plays with my hair, twirling it around his finger. “You look so beautiful right now with the snowflakes sticking to your hair. An angel sent from above. My angel. My girl.”

  There is no way I could not have fallen in love with this man. Everything he says, everything he does, is perfect to me. My gloved finger traces his jaw before reaching around and pulling his head forward. The moment our mouths lock it’s nothing but a burst of light, dimming the stars and moon with our powerful glow of love.

  His tongue touches my lips and I open for him, basking in the joy as he shows me by his actions how much he loves me.

  We walk backward slowly until I’m pressed against a tree, never once breaking contact with his lips. Our hands roam over our bodies, separated by layer after layer of clothing. Oh, how I would love to get rid of these layers so I can finally see James.

  “Tomorrow we’ll celebrate properly,” he says. His mouth moves down my throat and I tilt my head to the side, giving him better access to the delicate skin.

  “Yes.”

  “You taste so good right here.” The tip of his tongue grazes the hollow dip of my throat and I moan in response.

  “James.” My voice is breathy, floating in the air like the falling snow around us. He brings his head back up and cradles my face again while his thumbs gently stroke the arch of my cheek.

  “I love you,” he says, sending me spiraling toward the heavens again.

  “I love you too.”

  “What time can you come over tomorrow?”

  My hands run up and down his coat, playing with a few buttons along the way. “After dinner. My parents think I’m going away for the weekend with Penny. Liam has volunteered to keep her busy so no one will question it. Anything in particular you want me to bring?”

  “Just you.”

  I laugh. “Well, are we going out? Are you making me dinner at home? I kind of need more to go on than that.”

  “Yes, we’re going out to dinner. I’ve made us reservations a couple towns over so I can take you out properly without suspicion.”

  “Sounds great.”

  With a final scorching kiss, James backs away and pulls me toward our parked vehicles. Somehow I was able to still hold onto my acceptance letters, although I’m not entirely sure how.

  “Tomorrow,” he says, opening my car door for me.

  “Tomorrow,” I repeat with the smile still plastered on my face.

  With a quick peck on my cheek, he closes my door and stands next to his truck, watching me as I drive back toward my house.

  “This can work,” I mumble to myself. It worked for my parents; it has to work for me.

  I’M NERVOUS FOR THE FIRST time in what seems like ages. I double check everything in my overnight bag, just to make sure that I haven’t forgotten anything. Not that it would be an issue if I did. We could always just go out and buy whatever it is I need, but that means more sneaking around and James is still having issues with that. But circumstances being what they are, our actions are pretty much dictated for us. Lies, deceit, and covert operations are the beginnings of our relationship. That’s normal, isn’t it?

  “You ready?” Liam asks from my doorway. I turn to face him and smile, knowing it doesn’t quite reach my eyes.

  “I think so.” I walk over to hug him tightly. There’s so much gratitude I want to convey with this one simple gesture. “I can’t thank you enough for doing this.”

  He hugs me back then grabs my bag off the bed. “No need to thank me. This weekend is for me as well so we’re both getting what we want.”

  I swallow hard and shift on my feet. “Just please, please be careful with Penny. I know how you feel about her and I know how she feels about you. I just don’t want you both to rush into something before it’s ready to fully blossom. Deep in my heart I know you two could be epic. The timing just needs to be right. You know what I mean?”

  Liam smiles and ruffles my hair, making me rush back to my mirror to see the damage. “Relax, I didn’t mess it up. And I do know what you mean. I know that we are meant to be together. As painful as it is, I’m going to take it slow because I don’t know what’s going on through her mind and I don’t want to scare her off. We’re both still so young, but it’s hard to ignore the little voice in my head that says grab her before someone else does.”

  “You’re such a good man. I’m proud to be your sister.” We smile and walk out my bedroom door and down the stairs. Our parents are in the living room, cuddled together on the couch with a book between them.

  “Stay safe, Britta,” my dad says. “We know you think you can take care of yourself but remember, you’re still just a young girl.”

  I walk over and hug them both so they don’t have to leave the couch. “I will, promise.”

  Mom turns her attention to Liam and eyes him carefully. “And what are your plans for the weekend?”

  He smirks and kisses her on the cheek. “Shenanigans.”

  She rolls her eyes and sighs. “Of course. You are your father’s son after all.”

  The look my dad gives her has me snickering to myself. She replies with a kiss on his cheek. “Take it as you will. I’ve heard the stories of your younger years before we met.”

  “And where did you hear those from?” he asks.

  “Your mother and I do talk to each other, dearest, along with Tom and David, who were with you when said shenanigans took place.”

  “You can’t believe anything they said.”

  Mom shakes her head and shoos us out with her hand. “You two have fun and we’ll see you on Sunday, preferably by dinnertime?”

  “Yes, Mom,” we both chime out in unison. We close the front door as my dad’s lips falls onto hers. Liam and I both would like to retain whatever contents are in our stomach before we get into his car so we couldn’t get out of there fast enough.

  He drives the short distance to James’s house. We don’t really say anything but then again there’s nothing left to say. He’s spending the weekend with Penny to keep her occupied and I’m spending the weekend with James. We both get what we want in a roundabout way.

  “I’m walking you to his door,” Liam states with a quasi-authoritative tone. I roll my eyes and follow him to the front door as he carries my bag for me. My nerves are scattered everywhere and I don’t think I’m going to have any skin left on my bottom lip as I chew on it incessantly.

  “Stop it or I will take you home. You don’t have to worry about me beating him up or threatening his livelihood in the event he hurts you. We’ve been talking quite a bit and have actually become friends. James is a good guy and really cares about you. I know I’m leaving you in good hands.”

  I turn and hug him again, trying to keep the tears at bay. “Thank you for understanding.”

  “Just don’t go and get pregnant. I can’t help you out with that one.”

  I smack his chest as James opens his front door. He looks positively sexy in just his jeans and cotton shirt. It was hard not seeing him all day today, but he thought it would be difficult to contain himself if we were together at school so he avoided me like the plague. Not that I could blame him. The anticipation of waiting for this moment ate at me the entire day, making it so I could barely focus on anything other than him. I had to be slapped back to reality a couple of times in the form of cold water on my face between classes
since a cold shower wasn’t really an option.

  “Thanks again for this. We really appreciate it.” James and Liam shake hands with knowing smiles.

  “Just do me a favor and don’t give me any details on what you two did over the weekend. As far as I’m concerned I’m dropping her off with a friend and then never looking back.”

  They laugh and I shift on my feet, half anxious to ditch Liam and half nervous to be left alone with James. He must sense my nervousness because he grabs my hand and pulls me to him. My arms wrap around his back and I bury my nose in his neck, drawn to his masculine smell that captivates me with ease.

  Liam clears his throat and my face flushes with embarrassment. I almost forgot he was still here. “Sorry.” He responds with an over-exaggerated eye roll.

  “I’ll be back to pick you up around four on Sunday. Have fun.” He pauses. “No, wait, I don’t want to know.”

  The two shake hands again before Liam quickly retreats back to his car. He’s anxious for his weekend to start as well. So is Penny because she hasn’t stopped chewing my ear off about it since she found out on Wednesday. At least she bought the lie of me wanting to stay home for the weekend to study instead of joining them at the ski lodge.

  James shuts the door and removes my coat. He hangs it in his front closet and I place my boots on the rug nearby. I gasp when a pair of strong arms wrap around my waist and pull me into him.

  “Hey,” he says with a twinkle in his eye.

  “Hey,” I whisper back.

  Our lips meet and whatever fears were present have vanished at the sweet taste of his mouth. My fingers find their way into his hair and glide through the thick silky strands. James’s hands have a mind of their own as well, gripping my waist tighter and pulling me flush against him as my back hits the wall with a soft thud. My heart beats a pounding rhythm in my chest, with a matching pulse between my legs, as I feel his hips press into my own.

  “I’m so glad you’re here.” He nuzzles into my hair, breaking the hold he had on my mouth. He gently sucks my earlobe into his mouth. My hands run down his back, feeling each and every muscle flex and move as his hands continue their exploration of my body.

  “Me too.” Higher brain function does not exist for me. The only thing my scattered mind can focus on is the need to remove the barriers between us until we are connected in every way possible.

  A moan escapes me when his mouth latches onto the curve of my neck near my shoulder and samples the skin with his tongue. Goose bumps erupt across my body and I dig my nails into his back. We haven’t even left his entryway and I’m ready to throw us both to the ground.

  He pulls back and strokes the messy tangles away from my face. I smile at him and blink several times as he draws me in deeper to his spell.

  “We should move inside. As much as I enjoy my front entryway, I’m sure there’s a more comfortable spot for us to say hello.”

  I nod as he threads his hand into mine, pulling me gently into his house while carrying my overnight bag in his other hand.

  “I’m just going to go ahead and put this in my room. Make yourself comfortable anywhere you’d like. Are you thirsty?” he asks, heading toward the hallway that I assume leads to his bedroom.

  A sudden rush of need pulses through my bloodstream. If he’s going to his bedroom, I have to follow. I slowly shake my head and take several cautious steps toward him. “Nope. Not thirsty.”

  James licks his lips and my body reacts with pure carnal instinct. Putting one foot in front of the other, I slowly make my way to him from across the living room. The air changes around us, crackling with a white hot intensity of need and lust. It’s been months since I’ve envisioned this scenario, being alone with him without fear of being caught. Months of longing and wanting from a distance, wondering if he’s felt anything remotely close to how I feel about him. Now with the knowledge that he does, I can’t wait any longer to be with him, join with him in every way possible.

  “You want the five cent tour?” he asks huskily. I nod and give him a lascivious grin. He looks around the living room, gesturing with his hand. “Living room.”

  I laugh quietly. “I’ve seen this room before. Take me somewhere I haven’t been yet.” My soft footfalls close the distance and find myself standing next to him. I place my hand in his. James kisses the corner of my mouth, creating another flurry of emotions to run wild through my system.

  With a jerk of his head and a tug of my hand, I follow him down the hallway in silence. It’s quiet and clean with several pictures adorning the walls. Black and white stills of various larger cities with the occasional family portrait hung in between.

  I stop at a picture of him with his parents and sister when he was younger. I run a finger along the photo and smile at his cute, cherub face. He stands beside me and watches as I take in the scene captured in time.

  “How old were you in this picture?”

  “About seven, I think. It was our first trip to New York and I desperately wanted to see the lions at the Central Park Zoo. My mom and dad had initially told me there wasn’t much time to sightsee because we were so busy with everything else, but then they surprised us with a whole day at the zoo. We walked around for hours to see each and every animal and they bought me as much junk food as I could possibly stuff in my face.” He smiles as the memory flashes in front of his eyes.

  “I’ve never been to New York,” I murmur. He squeezes my hand and wistfully smiles at me.

  “I’ll take you one day. Just you and I, and it will be the best day of your life.”

  “Promise?” I ask.

  He nods. “Promise.”

  “You know if we keep promising things to each other we should maybe write them down.”

  James laughs and taps his head. “I’ve got them written down right here. I’ll remember all of our promises and make sure each and every one comes true.”

  My fingers trace his jaw and he leans into the contact. “You’re too good to be true, you know that? Sometimes I have to pinch myself to make sure you’re real or that what we have is real. I don’t want to wake up one day and have it all vanish without a trace.”

  “I ask myself those same questions and come up with the same answer every time. You are real. What we have is real and no one is going to take it away.”

  “Five more months,” I breathe. He nods and kisses the corner of my mouth.

  “Less than five months until we’re free,” he corrects. Our foreheads touch and the heat of his breath beats against my lips.

  “This weekend, I want you to show me what we’re going to be like after this whole mess is done with.” I bite my bottom lip and look up at him through my lashes. Heat explodes through my veins when our mouths connect and seal over each other.

  My bag drops to the floor and he picks me up with both arms, cradling me against his chest. I throw my arms around his neck as he carries me down the hall and into his bedroom, kicking the door closed behind him.

  “We’ll finish the tour in the morning. Tonight I want to just focus on you.” He sets me down at the edge of his bed. There’s moonlight streaming in through his bedroom window, casting a soft, romantic glow into the room. Only I can’t focus on anything other than the intensity behind his eyes as he looks at me, peeling away every worry or fear that may lie dormant inside me. No one else will exist this weekend. It will be just the two of us finally getting the chance to be ourselves without judgment or repercussions.

  James grabs the hem of my shirt, his knuckles trailing across my heated skin as the material is removed from my body. Every sense is heightened, every nerve on edge as we stand in his room, basking in each other’s presence.

  Not wanting to be the only one shirtless, I run my hands up his taut stomach, letting the shirt bunch above my wrists as I run up the full length of his torso. He lifts his arms to help me pull it off him altogether. Smooth skin covers his extremely toned body and the hints of a defined six pack tease my fingers as they continue their journey
around the newly exposed flesh before me. His biceps and forearms garner my attention, leaving nothing untraced by my curious fingers.

  “You like what you see?” he asks. Even in the dark I know his brow is raised and a smirk is gracing his lips.

  “Very much,” I reply, not feeling the need to elaborate anymore.

  His fingers trail between my breasts and down to my fluttering stomach then move around behind me, exploring my back before working the clasp of my bra free. It falls effortlessly to the ground, leaving my full, aching breasts exposed to the cooler air.

  “So beautiful,” he murmurs before trailing his lips down the column of my throat, licking and sucking a path to the swell of my breasts. My head falls backward, exposing more skin to the ministrations of his lips and tongue as he pays rapt attention to every inch of me. I pull him closer, wanting the skin on skin contact until it feels like we are a single person instead of two individual ones. For he is my match in every way and I was made especially for him.

  Once we’re fully naked, our eyes travel over the planes of our bodies between deep kisses and soft caresses. James lifts me up onto his bed, guiding me to the middle as he climbs over me, taking his time to admire my body beneath him.

  “I’ve waited a long time for this moment,” he says, trailing his lips down the column of my neck again.

  “Me too.” I run my fingers through his hair. I can’t get enough of it and he seems to enjoy it by the soft moans and gasps I hear as I play and pull at the silky strands. But my grip loosens as his fingers run between my legs, finding the warm and wet heat of my aching core. The first contact steals the air from my lungs and with each retreat and entry into my body with his skilled fingers, a new pressure builds inside me. My fists clutch his sheets as the first wave rolls through my body, causing my legs to tense and release as I soar high into the atmosphere then gently fall back down from the clouds.

  He leans over to open a side drawer on his nightstand and tears into a new box of condoms. With the foil wrapper in his hand, he leans over me again and runs his nose along my jaw line.