Lost In You

by Remmy Duchene

  “And we’re all entitled to our opinions.”

  “But you’re still offended.”

  “No.” Ko took a sip from his drink and set the glass back on the table. “We have a meeting tomorrow with Priya at my place. After she leaves, why don’t I show you just how vanilla I am?”

  Jackson’s Adam’s apple danced.

  “Like I said, you have your opinions and you’re entitled to them. The questions now become—are you all talk, Jackson? Or can you put your body where your mouth is?”

  Chapter Nine

  Being at the airport on any day was a pain. But as Jackson stood at the glass window of the Bathsheba International Airport and stared out at the Boeing cruising toward the gate, his heart raced. He was about to be a grand uncle in his twenties. But that wasn’t what scared him. Once this little boy made it into Darius’ and Feng’s arms, Jackson’s life would be changing for the better—he hoped. He found it strange how much he loved a child he hadn’t even met yet. Though Darius and Feng had traveled back and forth between Bathsheba and China numerous times in the adoption process, Jackson had always been too busy to join them.

  He turned to look at Darius who was pacing one way then the next.

  “Uncle…”

  “Mmm?”

  “You’re wearing a path into the floor.”

  Darius laughed. “I’m sorry. I’m nervous.”

  The reunion between Darius, Feng and their little boy, Oliver, was a beautiful one that left Jackson smiling so hard he thought his face would be stuck that way. He hugged the ten-year-old tightly, for though they had yet to meet face to face, the two had played numerous games of chess online. That had been Feng’s idea to get the two acquainted.

  Afterward, though Feng and Darius invited him over so they could have dinner, Jackson declined. He figured they needed time as a family and he should go home and get some work done, anyway.

  On the ride to his place, he wondered if he’d ever be as happy as he had seen his uncle that day. Sure, he was content with his life at the moment, but his future looked lonely and dreary, and that sent a cold tremor through him. Jackson entered the lift and pulled the doors closed and locked. The freight elevator took him and his motorcycle up to his penthouse and he rolled the cycle into the sunroom. He’d had it tricked out so he could have a place for his bike.

  Once parked, he made a sandwich and reported to his office in order to start working on his new game. But after a couple of hours, he had nothing.

  Jackson crumpled another piece of paper and chucked it behind him. He couldn’t concentrate on building his third game. Sure, the second game still had to be released, but he couldn’t wait until then to begin the third and final game in the series. First the title wasn’t coming to him. Together We Rise. Together We Stand, and now what? Together We Fall—not encouraging. Together We Die—morbid. Together We— What the fuck?

  Nothing made sense.

  Frowning, he gave up and walked away from what was left of his notebook. Maybe he needed alcohol. Some singers couldn’t write great tunes unless they were drunk or stoned off their asses. That could be his issue.

  Lost in his thoughts that had gone from the video game to his impending meeting with Ko, Jackson made his way into the kitchen and began prepping dinner. Though he wasn’t sure what he was in the mood for, he began making an omelet. Breakfast for dinner and there was nothing anyone could do about it.

  “That’s right. That’s how I roll.”

  He laughed out loud to himself and reached for the ground pepper when his doorbell rang. Jackson shrugged, dumped some pepper into his palm and tossed it onto his eggs. He only answered the door after he covered the pepper and set it back on the rack. Charlie hugged him and walked into the condo.

  “Hey, brother!” Charlie said. “You haven’t answered your phone all day. What is going on?”

  “What do you mean? I’ve been working.”

  “Uh-huh.”

  The two entered the kitchen and Jackson went back to cooking.

  “And now you’re making breakfast for dinner.”

  “I’m an adult. If I want to rim a man for dinner, I’m allowed to.”

  Charlie laughed. “Whatever, man.” Charlie grabbed water from the fridge and climbed onto a stool. “So, the reason I’ve been calling you nonstop all day is to find out how things went with Mr. Takao at lunch yesterday.”

  “I told him everything,” Jackson said, whisking the eggs with the spices. “He was okay with that. Then I put my foot in my mouth.”

  “How did you do that this time?”

  Jackson pressed his lips into a thin line as he poured his egg mixture into the hot skillet. He chopped up some onions and chives and dropped them in then turned to face Charlie. “I kinda insulted his sexuality—well, his prowess, I guess you can say.”

  “Hoo boy.”

  Jackson laughed and refocused on his food. Once he had it on his plate, he began a second omelet for Charlie. Though his friend had to be talked into it, soon both of them were seated at the dinner table eating and sipping on wine. They ate in silence and Jackson was happy Charlie didn’t ask him any more questions about Ko. They subject switched to video games, something that wasn’t as dangerous as the things he wanted Ko to do to him. A few times he almost blurted out what Ko said. But each time that soft, husky voice flowed over those words inside his head, Jackson spent most of that energy trying not to moan.

  ‘Can you put your body where your mouth is?’

  That had been Ko’s question, hadn’t it? Did that mean Ko wanted him?

  Long after Charlie headed home and Jackson was alone, long after the night passed into morning, the question still vibrated through Jackson’s head like a mantra. He tried clearing it by going for a run but an hour and a half of hoofing it brought no peace. When it was time to head to Ko’s, Jackson toyed with the idea of bringing a gift bag with lube and condoms but decided against it. He was still a little on the fence about Ko’s flirting.

  When he arrived at Ko’s, he noted that the house was beautiful. The front had a perfectly kept and healthy garden. Jackson pulled off his helmet to get a better look around. The street seemed quiet as if the loudest thing to ever pass along its banks was Jackson’s Suzuki. A part of him felt bad but another part shrugged. They needed a little noise to shake the demons.

  “Jackson?”

  He turned toward the voice and found a smile. “Hi, Ko. Sorry. I was just taking in the surroundings.”

  Jackson climbed off the cycle, and with his helmet under his arm, he jogged up the front steps and passed Ko into the house. After removing his shoes, he followed a feminine voice with Ko close behind him. Ko’s eyes were on him. He moved his hips a little more than usual, straightened his back a little more and made sure his posture was correct.

  “Jackson Stark as I live and breathe!” Priya cheered, dumping her cell into her pocket.

  He grinned and extended a hand to her but she hugged him instead. Since she’d started working for Ko, Jackson could hear her English had gotten much better. “How are you?”

  “I am well. A little tired from vacationing with Abhay, but I cannot complain.”

  “I’ll bring out some snacks and something to drink,” Ko said.

  “Let me help you,” Jackson offered.

  “That’s all right,” Ko said. “I got this.”

  He nodded and returned his attention to Priya “So we’ll be working together.”

  “Yes. Isn’t it amazing?” Priya asked, her eyes bright with promise and wonder. “I’m excited. It has been a while since I have had a co-star. I am happy it will be you. You did accept, right?”

  “Haven’t signed anything yet, but yes.”

  “Good.”

  Ko returned then and set a tray on the table. Though he had declined help before, Jackson reached over to assist in unloading the tray. Once they were all seated, juice and cookies in front of them, the three got down to business. Jackson was stunned to hear that Tasha woul
d be shooting the campaign due to an emergency with the other photographer, but he wasn’t going to complain. Tasha was an amazing photographer and he loved working with her. Honestly, he’d declined the Men Tower shoot until they’d mentioned her name.

  After a while, Ravinder arrived to get Priya—and then there were two. Silence flowed between them, periodically shattered by a dog barking in the distance. They stared across the table at each other and after a bit, the heat was too much and Jackson had to look away.

  “I know what you’re thinking,” Ko said finally.

  “You do?”

  “Yes.”

  “Okay. I’ll bite.” Jackson lounged back in the chair, hanging one arm over the side. “What am I thinking?”

  “You’re thinking that because I gave you a challenge yesterday that we must have sex today. But that’s not what it meant. I was only half-serious about that. You don’t have to be scared we’ll do anything you don’t want and right now I can see that is not what you want.”

  Jackson flushed. “And you’re sure that’s what I’m thinking?”

  Ko said nothing. He simply tilted his head, his brown gaze burning a sweet hole into Jackson.

  Unable to stop himself, Jackson reached across for the side of Ko’s face but Ko pulled away. Jackson was disappointed until he saw the look in Ko’s eyes as one full of mischief. Not wanting to give up, Jackson lifted one foot to drag his toes up Ko’s legs beneath the table. Again, Ko moved back out of reach.

  “Are we really still playing this game?” Jackson asked.

  “A game?” Ko asked, pushing his chair back and rising. “No, I don’t play games. But you will earn what I give to you.”

  Ko walked away then, leaving Jackson speechless at the glass table. For a moment, all Jackson could do was sit there staring in the direction Ko had gone. Eventually, he managed to pry himself up and stalked after Ko. He found him in the living room, back pressed against the wall. Jackson leaned his shoulder into the doorframe and watched Ko.

  “Whatever happens,” Ko said, “don’t leave that spot.”

  “Ko I…?”

  “Are you running? Do you want to leave?”

  “No.”

  “Then do as I say.”

  Jackson inhaled a sharp breath. The change in Ko surprised him, yet turned him on. He folded his arms across his chest.

  Slowly, Ko moved his right hand up to drag the palm over his chest up to his neck then down to his nipples. Jackson’s mouth watered, for though Ko still wore clothes, when he released the buds, they tightened and protruded against his shirt. It was hard to obey Ko, for all Jackson could think of was rushing forward, holding Ko to the wall and chewing on those nipples until they both climaxed. He dropped his arms and dug his nails into the sides of his thighs.

  But he licked his lips and kept his gaze fused to Ko, watching the way Ko arched into his own touch, the silent parting of Ko’s lips, the fire in his eyes. Everything in that moment left Jackson weak and trembling. He needed to touch Ko, to see if his skin was as hot as Jackson’s was quickly becoming.

  “Ko…”

  Ko slipped a hand beneath the waistband. He was fondling himself. Jackson could tell by the way Ko’s fingers bulged in the front of his pants.

  “I’m so jealous right now.”

  “Of?”

  “Your hand.”

  Ko laughed softly but turned away to hide what he was doing.

  “Come on, now.”

  “Touch me, Jackson.”

  “Is this a trick?”

  “A trick?” Ko arched his ass outward and moaned. “No trick.”

  Jackson darted forward and slipped to his knees. For a moment, he merely stared at Ko’s ass, wondering if he was worthy to be that close to it.

  “It’s not going to bite you,” Ko whispered.

  “I’m actually…” Jackson’s voice cracked. He cleared his throat, reached around Ko’s body to undo his belt, button and zipper. Holding his breath, he slid the pants away from Ko’s muscular body. He caressed down Ko’s thighs even as he pressed his face forward, inhaling Ko’s scent and feeling the heat of Ko’s flesh through his boxers. “You are so sexy.”

  “You think so?”

  Jackson didn’t reply until he pulled Ko’s boxers down and almost swallowed his tongue. He knew Ko had a hot body, but seeing Ko’s bare ass was something else altogether. He caressed Ko, sliding his palms over Ko’s body, loving the soft hairs. Unable to stop himself, Jackson licked at Ko—up his crack to his back. He wiggled his tongue against the flesh and groaned with the wildness that one action caused in him.

  “Jackson…”

  In reply, Jackson spread Ko before his eyes and unleashed his tongue. He feasted on Ko and every hard, yet sexy sound to escape his prey’s body, teased the beast waiting just beneath the surface of Jackson’s soul. Ko reached out and pressed the back of Jackson’s head. Jackson took that to mean Ko wanted more so he plunged his tongue past Ko’s ring. He loved the sensation tongue-fucking Ko sent through him.

  “Oh, damn,” Ko whispered. “That’s it. If you keep that up you’re gonna make me…”

  Jackson backed off. He scooted to his butt, spread his legs and drew them up to plant the soles firmly on the floor. He glanced up to see Ko watching him intently over his shoulder.

  “You wanted me to watch you, Ko. Turn around and stroke that cock for me.”

  Ko opened his mouth but he said nothing.

  “What’s the matter, Ko? Thought you were the only one with a little freak?”

  “I never expected you to be this…”

  “Shhhh.” Jackson licked his lips. “This is no time to talk, unless you want to stop.”

  Ko said nothing and Jackson smiled.

  “Give me what I want,” Jackson said.

  Ko moaned but rested his back against the wall. He wrapped is fingers around his beautiful cock, and to Jackson’s pleasure, tugged.

  Chapter Ten

  Ko’s orgasm cursed through him like a tidal wave. Who knew having Jackson watch him jerk off would leave him so wild and yearning? Even as he slipped to his knees and crawled forward, Ko was weak. Still, he couldn’t deny that Jackson, seated on the floor, naked with his beautiful cock hard and ready wasn’t enough to make him strong again.

  Without speaking, he pulled the tip of Jackson’s dick between his lips. He lashed it with his tongue then sucked. Jackson growled and buried his fingers into Ko’s hair. Sighing, Ko allowed Jackson to push more of his cock in until Ko gagged a little. Still, he merely adjusted by breathing through his nose.

  “Yes,” Jackson whispered.

  With that encouragement, Ko milked Jackson, loving the way Jackson seemed to melt on his tongue. Jackson’s body contorted under him even as Jackson’s fingers tightened in his hair. He gave up what Jackson’s body asked for, enjoying every gasp, every moan, every sweet, tangy drop of pre-cum.

  “Ko…”

  He lifted his head to meet Jackson’s eyes.

  “Ko?”

  “I’m right here. Tell me what you need, Jackson.” He punctuated his words by dropping a kiss along the head of Jackson’s cock.

  Jackson whimpered. “Fuck me.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Come on, Ko. You’re holding my hard cock in your hands. What do you think?”

  “Our bodies lie.”

  Jackson sighed and began pulling away from Ko. “This was what you wanted, right?” Jackson asked. “To make me like this just because you can.”

  “Jack…”

  But Jackson merely shoved him away and pushed to his feet. He scrambled for his clothes and had them bundled in his arms as he headed for the back door. “I need to get dressed.”

  Though Ko couldn’t see Jackson’s eyes, he knew the man was embarrassed. He stopped long enough to haul on his pants but then rushed after Jackson. He caught Jackson, wearing his pants and no shirt, heading down the steps into the backyard.

  “Jackson!” Ko called. “Jackson, wait.”


  “For what? This is obviously a joke to you—teased the little boy until he begs for it then watch him burn.”

  “Is that what you really think?” Ko paused. “I can fuck you, Jackson. I can give it to you better and harder than you’ve ever had it. That’s not the problem. Want isn’t the issue either. Make sure you know what you’re asking because once we cross that line there’s no going back!”

  Jackson whirled to face him. “That’s the line you’re worried about crossing? Sucking me off in your living room, wasn’t it?”

  “Shit! I don’t know! I’ve never done anything like this before.”

  A silent eternity passed between them even as Jackson pulled on his shirt. He walked toward Ko and stopped a mere inch away from him. For a long time, their eyes met and Ko wanted nothing more than to take Jackson into his arms and kiss him until Jackson was breathless and climaxing. But he didn’t see passion in Jackson’s eyes, just anger and confusion.

  “Let’s get something perfectly clear.” Jackson’s voice was hard. “I’m not a child. I’m a grown-ass man who knows what he wants. If I say I want to be fucked, that’s what I mean. Don’t second-guess it. Don’t judge it. Just do it. If you have an issue with that or if you’re hesitant, then that’s on you.”

  Ko moaned.

  “Now. We’re going to try this again.”

  Jackson walked around him and into the house. He followed behind Jackson, watching the way he navigated the stairs then found the master bedroom as if he had done so before. Standing at the door, he waited while Jackson got naked again.

  “Condoms and…” Jackson asked.

  “Bedside table, top drawer.”

  Jackson gathered what they needed and turned to face him.

  “Ask me again,” Ko said, his voice cracking. Watching Jackson’s dick harden made Ko tremble. “Ask me again.”