Broken Angel

by Lee Heaven

  “Sure, I’ll be back in twenty with it.”

  “Thanks, Stacy,” I yell after her as she closes my door.

  Grabbing my cell from under the pile of papers on my desk, I call to double check with Shawn if he’s taking Josie.

  “What?” he answers.

  “Well hello to you too,” I chirp back at him as friendly as I can.

  “What do you want?” he barks in a short tone that makes me want to reach through the phone a choke him.

  “Ugh, why don’t you try just being nice? I was only double checking to see if you’re taking Josie tonight.”

  “Yeah I’m gonna take her. Same time, same place?”

  “Sure. I might not be there. I have a meeting and if it runs late I won’t be there in time. But Daniel and Maggie will bring her.”

  I know he’s not going to be happy with that answer. He hated the fact that I worked when I was with him, because it meant he couldn’t control me. Now he hated the fact that I worked, loved my job, had my own life, was with Decker, made a ton more money than him and mostly because he couldn’t control me anymore.

  The one thing he hated worse than that was Maggie.

  “Whatever,” he said in a short tone.

  “Don’t be such an ass.”

  “Whatever, talk to you later.” He hangs up on me. What an asshole.

  Pressing another button I call Maggie to let her know. “He’s in a mood so be careful when you go to meet him.”

  “I’ll be fine. He won’t say two words to me. He knows I’ll smack him upside the head.”

  “Ha-ha. Maggie, just be careful. I’m not sure what time I’m getting out of here but I’ll call you when I’m leaving.”

  “Make sure you eat lunch,” Maggie scolds me.

  What is it with everyone? Do they know that I won’t eat unless I’m told? Am I that easy to read? Even Decker sends me text messages reminding me to eat. I’ve already gotten two from him today and I’m sure Stacy came in because he called her.

  “Stacy’s already off getting me a salad and cheesecake.” I laugh back at her.

  “Good. Talk to you later.” She hangs up and I get back to work.

  ~~~

  Last meeting of the day is with my team. Mark Connan, Cindy James, and Dennis Wood, all three have been great with helping me with my first fundraiser. Although I had a feeling at first Cindy was a little mad since she was gunning for my position. But whatever she was feeling seems to have passed as she is usually one of the first to stick up for me when someone criticizes me saying I only got the job and is kept on staff because I was sleeping with Decker.

  Yeah that may have been why I got the job to begin with, but I have proven myself a tough worker and I will prove myself even more when I pull off this art auction.

  “All right guys, is there anything else or have we covered it all?” I look toward the three other team members sitting at the table with me.

  “I think that covers about everything on my end,” Mark says. Mark is in charge of decorations. He’s got some great ideas on centerpieces and is going over to the hotel that Cindy booked to work with their staff on place settings and take sample pictures so I can choose the one that I really like.

  “I’ve got the makeup and wording of the invitations. I’ll get a sample made and have it messenger to your apartment by Wednesday. I’ll drop the check off at the hotel for the banquet hall on my way home,” Cindy added holding the envelope with the check in it up and giving it a little wave.

  Dennis flipped through his papers, looked up and said, “Guest list is almost complete. I’ll make sure to have the final list included with the sample invitation when Cindy sends it. Besides that I’m good on everything else.”

  “Well, with that we are kicking ass, which I love. I want to thank all you guys for giving me a chance and helping to make my first fundraiser a successful one. Now let’s get out of here and go home for the weekend.”

  No faster then I said it all three were out the door calling goodbye and have a good weekend at me. I guess keeping them here on a Friday night was a little rough, but it was the only time when all three of us were available at the same time.

  Gathering my papers and folders I call Maggie, “Hey, did my little girl get off ok?”

  “Yeah Shawn saw me and didn’t even get out further then his trunk. I don’t know why he’s so afraid of me.” Maggie laughs.

  I couldn’t help laughing at her she was all spitfire and hell on wheels. Her don’t mess with me attitude I found funny but Shawn hated it.

  “He doesn’t like you because you don’t bend to him and take his shit. It scares him to not have that control. Good I’m glad she’s ok though.”

  “You still at work?”

  “Yeah, I’ll be out of here in like ten minutes no more. Want me to grab some pizza on the way home?”

  “I’ll do it. I’ll be home before you so I’ll have it waiting for you. Don’t be long.”

  “I’ll see you in a little bit.” I click off the phone and slip it into my bag and start cleaning up my papers so I can head home and work from there for the next week.

  Something doesn’t feel right as I walk to my car through the parking lot. It’s making the hair on the back of my neck and arms stand up. I keep looking behind me but no one is there. The parking lot is just about empty, it is seven-thirty on a Friday night and everybody cuts out early for the weekend. I pick my pace up just a little faster hoping to get to my car and away from whatever the danger is that I feel.

  I keep looking around, but I still don’t see anything or anyone. I thought for a second about going back inside and getting the security guard to walk me to my car, but that guy is older than dirt and I seriously doubted he could fend off any danger I could be in.

  I hit the auto start on the car and hear it start up. I don’t recognize the car parked next to mine, but then again I don’t know most the cars in the parking garage on a normal day so I really don’t think twice about it. It could be one of the security guards or even someone from another office that is working late. I hit the unlock button on the key fob and reach for the door. Just as my finger curl around the handle I feel something sharp prick my neck and a hand wraps around me and covers my mouth. Didn’t matter anyways within second’s blackness takes over and I was out unable to scream for help.

  ~~~

  Once again I wake up chained to the wall. The chain is long enough to let me lie on the bed and reach the bathroom. It wasn’t long enough to reach the shower along the back wall but it allowed me to use the toilet and use the sink. Whoever has me left a toothbrush, toothpaste, a bar of soap, wash cloth, and hair brush on my sink the first day there, so I can semi-wash daily.

  The window in the room I can reach, but I can’t see out of as there is newspaper covering it from the outside, not allowing me to rip it down and it is screwed shut. The door is always closed and locked. But every morning when I wake up there is a tray of peanut butter sandwiches and bottled water on the dresser.

  At least my kidnapper is nice enough to leave me food and toiletries. Too bad he won’t leave the damn door unlocked or unchain my foot. Or even be loud enough to wake me up when he comes in.

  I’m on my third day. At least I think it’s my third day, could be more not sure how long I was knocked out after I was taken. Three days I’ve spent not knowing where I am. I can hear an elevated subway rumble by every ten minutes or so, so I believe I’m still in the city just in one of the outer boroughs.

  I can hear a television through the door. I press my ear against the door hoping to hear more clearly, but the volume is to low and I can’t make it out. Just like the other days I try the door knob. It actually opens. Fuck!

  I slowly open the door. It’s quiet, like the hinges have just been oiled. At least that explains why I never hear the door open. I look out the slightly cracked door. I can see a chair with a man sitting in it, but I can only see the back of his head. He has short shaved light brown almost dirty blond
e hair. Nothing really to identify him with. Then I see the television.

  Decker! Decker’s on television. He’s with my parents. I try to hear what he’s saying the volume is so low. ‘Please whatever you want it is yours. Name your price, call one of us. We just want Sarah back safe and sound.’ He’s in New York! I recognize his lobby. He’s so worried, his eyes are red, he’s been crying and probably hasn’t slept much.

  An arm drops to pick up the beer bottle on the floor next to the chair. I silently gasp as I recognized the tattoo on the arm. “Kevin?” I ask quietly. The arm quickly raises and he tries to hide. “Fuck, Kevin, I know that’s you. I’d recognize that fucking devil tattoo on your arm anywhere. I was with you when you got the fucking thing. Kevin, why are you fucking doing this? Kevin, get your God damn ass up off that chair and talk to me!”

  He doesn’t move. He just sits there watching Decker and my parents plead for my life.

  “Kevin Charles Reed, you dickless asshole! You can’t sit here one minute and tell me you still fucking love me then do this to me and not even have the balls to fucking face me the next. You can’t love me. You have no fucking idea what love is. If you did you wouldn’t be fucking doing this. You would be fucking cherishing me and treating me with respect, not leaving me fucking chained to the wall. Get up you fucking asshole and talk to me.” I screamed at him.

  He reaches down and grabs his beer. I hear him take a long sip. He places the bottle back on the floor and stands up. He’s not as tall as Decker, but he’s probably just as muscular, his back and arms ripple as he stretches. He turns and pins me with a stare. I can’t decipher what the look on his face means. He stalks toward me. I back up slowly until I hit a wall.

  He walks up and presses his body into mine, officially trapping me against the wall. His cologne floods into my nose. It’s the same as years as ago, Calvin Klein ck one, it makes my knees weak. Oh please don’t show it. Be strong. Be strong.

  He dips his head and kisses my neck. Then he locks me with that stare again.

  Mustering up all my strength I look him in the eyes and say, “It won’t work. I don’t love you. I can’t love you.”

  He turns and walks from the room closing and locking the door behind him. I sink down to the ground and pull my knees up into myself. Wrapping my arms around them I drop my head and just cry.

  Two more days he does this. He just comes in and kisses me then leaves while saying nothing. He’s trying to break me. He wants me to give into him. But I never do. I never kiss him back. I never touch him. I never say a word to him. But I know what I need to do. I need to make him think he’s won. I need him to think I’ve given up.

  Can I do this? Can I kiss another man? Can I give myself to another man? Can I give myself to this man? I’m gonna have to. I have to play into his game.

  ~~~

  I think it’s my sixth day, which would make it Thursday. Six days of being trapped in here. Six days of Decker and my parents not knowing where I am. It’s raining really hard when I wake up. I can hear it pounding against the window. The window! Looking over I can see the rain has ripped the newspaper off the window. Yes I can see where I’m at! I look out the window my mouth hits the floor. There it sits just down the block, Yankee Stadium. I’m in the Bronx. I’m so close to home.

  I hear Kevin’s feet padding across the floor headed toward me. I scurry away from the window and back to the other side of the room. This is it. I need to make him think I actually want him. I need to make him think he won.

  He opens the door. He’s not wearing a shirt today. He did that on purpose. He knows that a man covered in tattoos is a big turn on for me. He’s thinking of the little things to try and break me. I notice the tattoo covering his left side chest. It’s a girl, lying on a blanket in the woods.

  “What’s that?” I ask gasping and pointing to it.

  “That is you. I put it there to keep you in my heart.” His eyes sparkle something fiery and fierce. Something I had never seen before, something that I couldn’t tell if it frightened me or not.

  Is it new? Old? How long has he had it? Did he get it shortly after he broke my heart? Did he get it seven years ago after he saw me again? Or did he get it a few months ago when I hit the news? “If I was in your heart why didn’t you come find me?” I asked, trying to put a sad and lost face on to make him think I was hurt and lonely without him.

  “Because I was stupid,” he said as he pinned me against the wall. His mouth swooped down and started on my neck. I knew what I needed to do. I had to play into him.

  This time I raise my arms and wrap them around his neck. I push my hips into his groin. I feel his chest rumble. I know he thinks I’m beginning to break down. I just have to keep playing him. He pulls back and looks into my eyes. I don’t say anything.

  Then he steps away. “You’re not here yet. You’re not completely with me. I can still feel you thinking about that baseball player. Until he’s not there, you will stay chained to that wall.” He turns and leaves the room slamming and locking the door behind him.

  Walking over toward the window I look out. I look down the street to that beautiful stadium, the place where in just over a week I should be sitting with Maggie cheering our boys on. Pressing my hand against the window I whisper, “Please forgive me, Decker, for what I need to do. Please don’t be mad for it’s the only way.”

  The sun sets and I lie on the mattress and cover myself with the thin blanket and cry myself to sleep again for hopefully the last time. For tomorrow I will lay my plan down and I will make sure I am free of this chain and of Kevin for the last time.

  Chapter 11

  I stood staring out the window. I can tell by all the people dressed in their work clothes it was still during the work week. I’ve lost track of the days. I think its Friday but I’m not sure. If it’s still Friday then I know the office staff and grounds crew will be at the stadium. Linda always gets there around seven-thirty to open it up for the rest of the staff who aren’t down in Florida. All I have to do is get this chain off my ankle and find a way out.

  I have no idea what time it is. I ate the McDonalds bacon and egg McGriddle sandwich Kevin left for me today. It was so good to have something besides the peanut butter sandwich he usually left. And there was orange juice! Oh the sweet tangy juice was gulped down in two sips. I’m sure he left both knowing it was my favorite. He used to bring them to me every morning.

  I need a shower. My hair is so greasy, my scalp itches and the soap has thinned so much I’m no longer getting a good lather to fully clean.

  I hear Kevin coming. This is my chance. The door opens and I plaster a smile so big my cheeks hurt. “Thank you so much for the breakfast. It was wonderful. I’m surprised you remembered it was my favorite.”

  “You’re welcome.” He smiled at me. “I remember everything about you. Remembering you is something I made sure that I do every day.”

  He walks toward me like he did every day. Walking till I hit the wall. But this time I made the move first. I wrap my arms around his neck. I seal my lips on his and search his mouth with my tongue. It was the first time we actually kissed on the mouth in years. Every other time he came in he just kissed the tender spot on my neck.

  I tilted my hips up, press my back into the wall and lift my legs to wrap around his waist and ground my sex into his hard groin.

  As his lips slid down my neck, I let out a moan to show him he was turning me on. I run my hands over his shoulders, scrapping my nails over his neck and back. Moaning as he hit certain spots with his tongue.

  “Kevin, mi amore, I need you to stop and look into my eyes. I need to tell you something,” I whisper, hoping calling him “mi amore” like I used to will get me somewhere.

  He nips at that tender spot by my ear, and then locks his baby blue eyes on mine. “What do you need my love?” he says as he presses a kiss to my lips.

  “I love you, mi amore. I’ve always loved you. I’m sorry for making you wait so long. But I’m scared of yo
u laughing and breaking my heart again. I love you. Do you hear me, Kevin? I love you. Mi amore!”

  “I won’t hurt you this time. I promise. I love you. Please make love to me. Let me show you how much I love you.” He said as he put his hands around my face.

  “Nothing would give me greater pleasure then to let you love me. To pleasure me with your body. But I need a shower first. I haven’t showered in a week and I need to be clean for you. I need you to trust me and take the chain off my foot and let me shower.” I kiss him deeply hoping this will prove that I won’t run if he releases me.

  He lowers me from his body. Kissing me he turns and leaves closing the door behind him. Oh God, it didn’t work. Fuck, I pushed too much. But then the door opened and he was back. He had a shopping bag with him. He pulls out a new bra and underwear, a t-shirt that looked three sizes too big for me and then pulls a flowery travel bag out.

  I gasped. “Is that what I think it is?”

  He shook his head yes at me. It was the bag that I had left at his house for when I spent the night with him. I always made sure it was stocked so I wouldn’t have to leave. He had one at my house too. It had made its way to the garbage about five days after he crushed me.

  I opened the bag and there was the shampoo and conditioner I used to use. Opening the bottles I smelled them. It smelled like a meadow blooming in spring. Tears came to my eyes. “I stopped using this after you walked away from me. Smelling it reminded me of you and I cried every time I washed my hair.” I took out the small bottle of soap and some make up. I took out the razor and removed the safety cap. It was very rusty.

  “Here, I figured that would be no good.” He handed me a new razor.

  “Thank you,” I said breathlessly. Then I saw it. The blue turquoise butterfly necklace he had given me years ago. The clasp had broken one night and I put it in my case to keep it safe. I had forgotten all about it. I grasped it and brought it to my lips, kissing it. Tears were now flowing down my cheeks.