Wildest Dreams

by Rosanne Bittner

  She had been helping Mae bake this afternoon, and she noticed she had flour on her cheek. She brushed it off and tucked a strand of hair back into a comb, then hurried out to the front of the house, where several Double L men had gathered to stare. Tyler drove a rickety wagon packed in the back with supplies, upon which sat two dark-eyed children. Their long, black hair blew in the hot summer wind, and their eyes were wide with curiosity. Lettie felt sweet joy at the sight of the two grandchildren she had never seen. Now there were five. Katie had had her third child in June, a boy named Robert Bradley. Three grandsons and two granddaughters! Not only had God brought back her Nathan, but a whole family with him, and she wondered when she had been happier.

  She rushed down the steps to greet them. The woman sitting next to Nathan was beautiful, needing not an ounce of color or creams or fancy clothes to bring out that beauty. It was a simple beauty, her dark skin clear and looking smooth as satin. She wore her long hair in a bun, like a white woman, and Lettie was surprised to see she was wearing a yellow calico dress. Somehow she had expected Nathan's Indian wife to arrive in a fringed deerskin dress, her hair in braids. She took hold of the woman's hands as soon as she climbed down from the wagon. "Hello! I am Lettie, Nathan's mother. I'm so very, very happy you've come!"

  The woman looked apprehensive. "I am Leena," she said quietly. She turned to the wagon. "These are your grandchildren, Julie and Luke. Julie is four summers, Luke is two."

  "Oh, they're so beautiful," Lettie exclaimed with tear-filled eyes.

  "I take it we're at the right place, ma'am?"

  Lettie had hardly realized that three soldiers had accompanied the wagon. She turned at the voice to look up at a bearded man in a blue uniform. "Yes. This is my son and daughter-in-law. Why are you here?"

  The man scratched at his beard. "We were assigned to come along to make sure they got here all right. Some people still don't like the sight of Indians, if you know what I mean. Without us along, some folks might not have believed they had a right to be off the reservation. I'm Sergeant Reeves, and these two are Private Dillon and Private Frazer, from the Standing Rock reservation. You're Mrs. Luke Fontaine then?"

  "Yes, I am. Thank you for accompanying my son. Please stay for something to eat and drink. We can put you up in a bunkhouse for the night so you can rest your horses before you start back."

  "That would be right nice, Mrs. Fontaine." The sergeant scanned the lovely Fontaine home, its well-manicured lawn, flowers blooming everywhere, ivy growing on the house. It didn't seem fair that any Indian should get to live this way, but it wasn't his business. If the Fontaines were crazy enough to take them in, they could have them.

  Lettie turned back to help lift down the children, her heart bursting with love at the sight of their beautiful, round faces. Little Julie smiled, revealing dimples, and Lettie hugged her close, feeling an instant bond. She was hardly aware of a second Indian woman, but Tyler noticed her right away when he walked around to the back of the wagon to open the gate. She rode behind the wagon on a pinto. Although she wore a white woman's dress, rather plain and a little too big for her, he noticed her feet were bare, and some of her bare leg showed from straddling the horse. She rode bareback, the horse's bridle made from simple rope. Her long, dark hair hung loose. He had been seeing more of Alice Richards lately, but neither Alice nor any other girl in town was as exotic looking as this one. She must be Nathan's step-sister, Ramona. Considering his resentment of Nathan, he knew he should also resent the intrusion of this full-blooded Sioux girl, but there was something exciting about her. Perhaps it was because he thought she ought to be forbidden to any white man, maybe not even worthy of one... or could it be the other way around? The proud look in her eyes made him realize she might think he was unworthy. He remembered that she was only sixteen; but she had a provocative beauty that made her seem older, and the breasts that filled out the bodice of her dress looked full and firm. There was a soft, free look about them that made him wonder if it was true Indian women never wore anything under their dresses. She didn't appear to be wearing a white woman's stiff undergarments.

  He quickly chastised himself for the thought. The girl sat there unsmiling, and he nodded to her. "Hello. I'm Tyler, Nathan's half brother." He still did not like admitting to people in town that his "Indian" brother was coming home; but for the moment he was glad, for one reason. That reason was sitting on a pinto horse looking back at him.

  "I am Ramona," she answered in a small voice. Ramona wondered if the young white man watching her knew what she was thinking—that she had never seen a white man before who stirred odd new urges deep at her insides. What a fine-looking man this Tyler was, with eyes much bluer than Nathan's, and such a handsome smile! He was big and strong looking, a fine specimen of a man, for being white.

  "Welcome to the Double L," Tyler told her. "My pa had a house built for you and Nathan and his family." He pointed to a log cabin about a half mile down the hill from the main house.

  She glanced at the cabin, seemingly unimpressed. "This is my own horse," she said. "Her name is Star." She patted the horses's neck proudly.

  "Looks like a fine horse," Tyler told her, looking the animal over. His eyes kept going back to her own slender calf and bare foot. He finally moved his gaze to meet her stirring dark eyes. "We've got plenty of horses here on the Double L. If you'd like to try riding any of them, I'd be glad to show them to you, take you out riding and show you the Double L."

  "The Double L?"

  "That's what we call the ranch—for my pa and ma— Luke and Lettie."

  She held her chin proudly. "I see. Two L's. I know all my letters, you know. I have had some of the white man's schooling at the reservation, but Nathan would not let them send me to the Indian school in the land of the rising sun. Many children go there and never come back."

  They were interrupted then by a round of introductions by Lettie. She told one of the men to ride and get Katie and Brad and tell them to come for supper if possible. "Katie has a new two-month-old son," she told Nathan, "so now there are five grandchildren! Luke had a house built for you. Oh, I wish he was here, but he's in Helena meeting with the territorial legislature. We've petitioned the government to make Montana a state, but they say it could take up to five years."

  She wondered why she was rattling on about something for which Nathan probably didn't give a damn. Why was she so nervous? She still held Julie, and Nathan picked up little Luke and handed him over. "I will take Julie so you can hold your grandson for a moment."

  Lettie took heart from the fact that Nathan was smiling. He seemed genuinely happy to be here. She handed Julie to him and took Luke into her arms. "Oh, Nathan, they're such beautiful children!" She asked Sven to unhitch the wagon and put up the horses.

  "Them horses belongs to the army, ma'am," Sergeant Reeves said, dismounting. "The only thing White Bear owns is the wagon and what's inside it."

  It seemed strange to hear Nathan referred to as White Bear. Apparently on the reservation he had continued to use his Indian name. "Well, we'll still put them up for you. You can take your own horses to the barn and get them brushed down."

  Ramona spoke up firmly. "This horse is mine. I will take care of her myself."

  Lettie looked up at the girl. She had not even had a chance to talk to her yet, but she realized it must be Ramona. She saw the defensive look in the girl's eyes, knew she was a little bit afraid. She handed Luke to his mother and walked up to Ramona, putting out her hand. "I am Nathan's mother. Welcome, Ramona."

  Ramona looked down at her hand, finally deciding to grasp it for a quick handshake. "This is my horse," she repeated.

  For some reason the girl seemed very defensive of her small pinto. Lettie let go of her hand and petted the horse's neck. "And a fine horse it is, Ramona. You are welcome to ride down to the barn and take care of her yourself. Anything we have is yours to use." She glanced at the Double L men standing nearby, reading their thoughts. No matter how beautiful Ramona was, the
y still resented having Indians on the Double L. "I want my son and his family all treated with respect," she warned them. "Show them around. Help them find what they need. They have free access to anyplace on the grounds. Please make them welcome."

  Some of them seemed chagrined. "Yes, ma'am, we'll do that," Billy Sacks replied. They all knew what this meant to Mrs. Fontaine, but most of them would abide by this new intrusion because they had their orders from Luke himself. None of them cared to go against those orders. There wasn't a better ranch to work on than the Double L, and none of them wanted to lose their jobs.

  "Unhitch the horses then, Sven," Lettie was ordering. "Nathan, bring the family inside. We have so much to talk about. I want you to eat supper here tonight. Katie and Brad will come. Oh, I wish Luke could be here," she repeated. "And Pearl. She would be so excited about this."

  Nathan set Luke on his feet and the boy toddled off to chase one of the many puppies that roamed the ranch. Nathan caught his mother's arm before she could go inside. "Be patient with Ramona," he told her. "She is afraid."

  "I can tell." She covered his hand with her own. "She'll be all right, Nathan."

  His eyes showed a haunting sadness. "They took so much from us. She lost her whole family, and the army took most of our horses. That is why she is so protective of her own." A proud but hurt look came into his eyes. "I once had many horses myself. They are all gone now. I feel bad coming here with nothing to offer."

  Lettie felt her throat constricting. "Just bringing yourself and two grandchildren we never knew we had is the most wonderful gift you could bring, Nathan. And there are hundreds of horses on the Double L. You can have any of them you like, or you can go riding after the wild ones. There are still plenty of those left, too."

  His eyes suddenly teared. "It has been a long time since I was free to ride and hunt that way."

  Lettie squeezed his hand. "Well, now you are. You're home, Nathan, and no one can take any of this away from you."

  Tyler was close enough to see and hear, and his chest burned at the remark. He turned away to take hold of Ramona's horse. "I'll show you where to take her," he said with a frown.

  Ramona slid off the animal and walked beside him. "You are jealous, Tyler Fontaine." He scowled at her. "What?"

  "You are jealous of Nathan. I can see it in your eyes."

  "I am not!" he said grumpily.

  "Yes, you are. You do not need to be."

  "What would you know about it?"

  "I know because Nathan told us everyone welcomed us to come, except he was not so sure you would. Do you want us to leave?"

  He stopped walking and looked at her, damned if he could control his curiosity at how she must look stark naked. She was so pretty, so perfect. "No," he answered. He stormed off to the barn, and Ramona hurried after on bare feet. She covered her mouth and smiled.

  May 1885

  Lettie opened the letter from Pearl. She sat near the hearth in the library, Luke sitting nearby smoking a thin cigar. "'Dear Mother and Father,'" she read. "'Things have gone so well that I am going to play in a concert with a local orchestra in July. I can hardly believe two years have already gone by since I left the Double L, and I miss you so; but I have never been happier, and Professor Bansen says he is amazed at my progress. I could have come home last summer or this year, but I have been so involved in concerts and my lessons. However, that is not the only reason.'"

  Lettie paused, frowning and reading on silently. "Oh, dear," she commented, glancing at Luke.

  He cast her a worried look. "What does that mean?"

  She sighed. "I'm not sure. I just never know how you'll react to some things, and apparently Pearl doesn't either."

  "What does the letter say? Let's hear it."

  Lettie looked back at the letter. "She says T hope Father won't be angry and that you will both trust my judgment. I am in love.'"

  Luke let out a sigh of disgust. "Pearl, too?"

  "'His name is Lawrence Bansen,'" she read on, "'and he is Professor Bansen's son. Lawrence is twenty-six years old and was studying music overseas when I first came here. He came home about a year ago, and I knew from the moment I met him that I loved him.'"

  "Don't all young girls think that way?" Luke grumbled.

  "I did," Lettie reminded him.

  He rubbed at his eyes. "You'd defend these kids if they committed murder."

  "Being in love is not exactly comparable to murder," she answered with a grin. She turned back to the letter. "'Lawrence is an accomplished pianist as well as harpist and violinist. He is also a conductor and composer, with a brilliant future. We are so happy together because we share all the same things. Our world is music, and when we marry—'" Lettie hesitated, realizing Pearl had said when, not if, as though there was no doubt about it, and her parents had no say in the matter. She glanced at Luke again, saw the disgust in his eyes. "'When we marry,'" she continued, "'we will live right here at the Bansen mansion, where other students stay. Someday I plan to help Lawrence write music, and also to teach piano. We both want to perform with the symphony in Chicago.

  "'Please be happy for us. I love and miss both of you so much, and I miss my brothers and Katie. I wish I could meet Nathan and his family. Maybe someday soon I will. I have told Lawrence so much about the ranch and our life there. He is quite fascinated by it all and wants to visit someday. He imagines Father as a big, rugged pioneer, fearless and daring, like the westerners we read about here in the dime novels.'"

  Luke chuckled in spite of being upset by the news.

  "Well, you are rugged and fearless and daring," Lettie told him.

  He just shook his head. "Finish the damn letter."

  "'Lawrence and I would like you, Mother and Father, to come to Chicago in July for our wedding. Both of us will be playing in the orchestra concert the night before, so you will be able to attend that also. I want so much for you to see Chicago. It is not like anything you have ever seen back home, I assure you. It has been so long since Mother went to the theater and such. You are so beautiful, Mother. I want the Bansens to meet you. I am sure they are picturing a weathered, pipe-smoking old pioneer woman. They will be so surprised to see how elegant and refined you are, and how handsome Father still is. They were quite impressed to learn Father had been voted into the territorial legislature, and I have told them I believe Father will be governor of Montana when it becomes a state.'"

  "She's really buttering us up, isn't she?" Luke sighed. "She's only eighteen. This Lawrence is eight years older than she."

  Lettie scowled at him. "'Luke, I was eighteen when I married you, and you're ten years older! Why do you insist that it all has to be so different for your own children? It sounds as though they are very happy and certainly well suited to each other."

  He puffed quietly on the cigar for a moment. "If I had been your father, I would have kicked me off that wagon train and taken you to Denver with me."

  "Oh, you would not, and you know it."

  He stared at his cigar. "Our Pearl left here a little girl and now she's become a woman without our seeing it happen." He rubbed at his eyes. "When is the wedding?"

  Lettie scanned the letter. "July eighteenth. She has sent us a map and address to get to the Bansen home."

  "I'll feel like an idiot around people like that."

  "I have a feeling they will be much more impressed by you than you will by them."

  "What the hell will we talk about?"

  "You'll probably be busy just answering questions." She rose and came over to kneel in front of his chair. "Be happy for her, Luke. Her life has been leading in this direction for years. And we can use the trip to accompany Robbie partway to Michigan. That is just about the time he's supposed to go off to school, so he won't have to make the whole trip alone. The school found a good family to look out for him, so both Robbie and Pearl will be just fine."

  He studied her, setting the cigar aside. "When did it get so easy for you to turn your children loose?"

  S
he smiled sadly. "When I realized it's impossible to hang on to them. At least we have Katie and Ty with us, and all our grandchildren, Luke. We know Robbie will come back here someday, and we don't have to wonder anymore about Nathan. We have him back with us."

  Luke frowned. "Things still aren't quite right between Nathan and Tyler. Tyler has acted as if he has a burr between his butt and his saddle ever since Nathan came back, and it's been over a year now. I've never shown one ounce of favoritism to Nathan, at least not that I'm aware of."

  She sighed deeply. "Ty just can't seem to get used to Nathan. It's partly because in some ways Nathan outdoes him without even intending to do it. Ty about had a fit when Nathan tamed that wild stallion Ty caught. Ty spent two weeks with that animal, and in one day Nathan had the horse following him around like a baby. I think that embarrassed Ty."

  Luke rubbed at his chin. "Some people have a better way with horses than others, that's all. Ty knows that. Tex used to be our top man when it came to taming the wild ones."

  "Luke, it hurt Ty's pride. It's all right for an outsider like Tex to show him up. But his own brother is something different, especially when it's a brother who replaces him as the oldest, and one who never had a part in building the ranch in the first place. He is very possessive of you, you know, and of his station here on the ranch."

  "He knows damn well his importance here isn't threatened." He shook his head. "I don't know. There's nothing I can do but let the two of them work it out."

  She put a hand on his knee. "We can't make decisions for any of our children anymore, Luke. They're very determined, every one of them in their own way, just as you were. Pearl is going to marry her musician, Robbie is going to be a doctor, Katie married a sheep man, and Tyler is determined to be in charge of this ranch. He's just protecting his territory, like a wolf. Things will get better as time goes on."

  "That thing over the horse opened some old wounds. Things were going pretty well until then."

  "He'll get over it. Just remember that no matter what you do, one of them will think you're playing favorites." She rose and looked at the letter again. "We can go to Chicago, can't we?"