Trusted (Club Indigo Book 2)

by Karen Nappa

  "Okay, guys. You did wonderfully. I want you to settle down a bit, so we can go on to the next activity." The other adults looked in astonishment at how quickly the children listened to his command.

  "How does he do that?" Suzie whispered to Laura. Laura's lips quirked and her eyes twinkled mischievously as she lifted her shoulders slightly.

  Mary chuckled. "Don't play innocent, dear. I think you know exactly why." She winked at Laura. Both Laura and Suzie gaped at Mary. But the older woman gave a self-satisfied smile and turned to join Dan, who had been setting the table for lunch.

  Suzie wanted to ask Laura about Mary's statement, but as the children went over to the dining table, she focused on getting out lunch. She had prepared pancakes and bacon for them and the three women went to help the children with their food. There were both maple and blueberry syrup available and Suzie had added several other choices as well. There were Nutella and a variety of prepared bowls with fruits. One held pieces of apple and crunchy cinnamon sugar, another was filled with strawberries. The last bowl held slices of banana with diced pecans and honey. Additional toppings included chocolate chips, coconut flakes, and whipped cream. It was fun to watch how some kids stuck to the more traditional toppings and others tried everything they were offered.

  Dan and James served milk, lemonade, or orange juice.

  After the children had eaten their fill, it was time for some free playtime and the grownups cleaned the dining area and took care of the dishes. The five of them settled down where they had a clear view of the children and enjoyed a salmon and asparagus quiche Suzie had whipped up for them. Suzie was dying to talk to Mary about her remark, but she was afraid the children might overhear. She settled for listening to the conversation, which focused on Laura and James' upcoming wedding.

  Suzie was pulled out of her musings as Laura stated, "I won't be signing away my identity again, James." Suzie frowned and looked over to her sister and brother-in-law to be in puzzlement.

  "It doesn't matter if you choose to use my name or not, honey. It does matter to me why you make the decision," James replied in a tone of voice that sounded like they were discussing their next meal. Suzie narrowed her eyes. At first glance, James looked relaxed. Turned sideways from the table, he had his legs stretched out in front of him, his arms leaned on the armrests, and hands clasped over his stomach. As Suzie took a closer look, she realized he wasn't as relaxed as he wanted the others to think. His hands were clasped so tightly that his knuckles were white. There were lines beside his mouth that showed how tense he was.

  Laura looked like a cornered animal, and while Suzie knew she wouldn't harm anyone on purpose, Laura had a sharp tongue and could hurt involuntarily.

  Before Suzie could say anything, Dan intervened, "I agree with James. Taking on his name wouldn't be giving away your identity, and you'd still be married, even if you're called Laura Turner."

  Suzie gaped at her father. The pre-Mary Dan would have never interfered or given his opinion. Live and let live had always been his motto. She turned her gaze over to Laura and discovered her sister was looking as perplexed at their father as she felt.

  Dan shrugged. "I know it's not my style to meddle, but James is right, honey. You're thinking about this decision with your eyes on the past rather than focusing on the future." He scratched his head and added a bit sheepishly, "If you don't mind me saying so."

  Without a word, Laura launched herself out of her chair and into James' arms, sobbing incoherent words.

  Suzie looked in awe at their father, and Mary patted Dan's hand proudly before taking his hand and addressing Suzie, "Let's get these dishes sorted and give them some privacy."

  The three of them took everything to the kitchen, but Laura and James didn't seem to realize. In that moment, only the two of them existed.

  Laura came walking into the kitchen with a red nose and red rimmed eyes, but she was wearing a smile and the tension had left her shoulders.

  Suzie heard James say, "Now follow me to the yard for some Quidditch." He had rearranged the children in two neat lines and they marched out of the house and into the garden.

  "All right, you all know soccer, don't you?" James asked and the children nodded.

  "Well, our Quidditch is a bit like soccer but there are some differences," James explained. "Each team has five players, all in the field and no one at the goal. Mr. Turner and I will be acting as Bludgers. We'll be standing at the sideline, using these foam balls to try to hit you. If you're hit, you aren't allowed to move until the Seeker has freed you."

  Abby stood jumping up and down, with her hand in the air. "Yes, Abby, do you have a question?"

  "Yes, Uncle James. Who will be the Seeker?"

  James smiled at her enthusiasm. "That, Abby, is a very good question. As a team, you appoint a Seeker, but Mr. Turner and I mustn't know who it is. Otherwise, we'd aim for the Seeker and your teammates won't be freed."

  "That makes sense."

  "You can score points by kicking the Quaffle," James pointed at the soccer ball in the middle of the field, "into the goal."

  A small girl with glasses and a curly mess of hair raised her hand.

  "Yes, Emily?" James asked.

  "What about the Golden Snitch, sir?" she asked shyly.

  James had to smile again. "You all know your Quidditch, don't you?" The girl nodded with a tentative smile on her face. "As you know, the Golden Snitch likes to hide." All the children nodded. "The little golden ball is hiding somewhere in this yard, so besides scoring goals and avoiding Bludgers, you need to find the Golden Snitch to win 150 points and end the game."

  After she had cleaned up with Mary and Laura, Suzie watched the game from her window and prepared for the last activity of the afternoon. She was glad for the small reprieve she'd gotten by the game the men were playing with the children. Her mind wandered to other times she had been looking out of the window. It had been before her new and fragile relationship with Connor had crumbled. She missed the man, even his gruff attitude and blunt remarks. A tentative smile tugged at her lips and she shook her head, when she thought back on their first meeting when he asked her, 'are ye gay?' What a way to start a conversation.

  Laura stepped in behind her. "Thinking about Connor?"

  Suzie turned her head so she could make eye contact with her sister. Tears were dancing in her eyes and she sighed, closed her eyes, and nodded. Laura hugged her. There was no need for words, and Suzie relished the comfort Laura provided. Even as kids, they had been close, and the illness and early death of their mother, combined with the depression Dan had suffered after that, only solidified the bond between them.

  Laura gestured to the garden. "Looks like they're coming back inside."

  "Okay, that was a great match. Well done to both teams and congratulations to Slytherin," Suzie told the children. "Does anyone need to use the restroom? Be sure to wash your hands." Almost all needed that, and it took some time, even with three toilets in the house.

  As they came back, she told them, "You can fetch something to drink from the counter."

  "Is it time for the cupcakes, Mom?" Abby asked with big eyes and a bright blush on her face, when everyone was back.

  Suzie hugged her girl to her and addressed the whole group, "For the lesson on 'Transfiguration,' I've made cupcakes. You can use anything on the table to transform your cupcake into the most wonderful creation you can manage. But don't eat your cupcake right away. We'll be judging them, and this will be the last points you can gain for the house and yourself."

  The children went to work eagerly. Suzie, Laura, and Mary assisted them and soon all were turning cupcakes into individual masterpieces. Meanwhile, Dan and James cleared away the evidence from the Quidditch game.

  At the end of the party, the points were added and Slytherin had won by only fifteen points. Each member of the winning house got a special goodie bag to take with them and there were different bags for the runners-up. The individual winner was Abby's friend, Emily, and
she was awarded a stuffed horse that looked to be a twin to Rainbow Dash. As the children left, Abby leaned into her mother and said, "I had a wonderful birthday." She stifled a yawn. "Thank you, Mom."

  Suzie felt good in that moment. Almost.

  "Are you okay, sis?" Suzie quietly asked Laura, after the children had left. She continued wiping the surface of the already clean table. Laura was kneeling to pick up a stray marker.

  Laura looked up at her sister. "Yes, I am. Jake really did a number on me and I seem to keep holding that against James. We've talked for a while and both decided it's best I keep going by Laura Turner."

  Suzie's brows raised and her eyes widened. "You are?"

  Laura chuckled. "James isn't hung up on me taking his name. His problem was the main reason I didn't want to take it."

  "Okay, I get that," Suzie acknowledged, "so why do you still want to stay Turner?"

  Laura rose to her feet and dropped the marker in the box of art supplies. "James reminded me that the two books on computer science I've published are under Laura Turner. We both think it's good to keep it this way, because I'm working on a new one about the Spring framework."

  Suzie squealed, "You're writing again, but that's amazing!"

  Laura smiled and the lines beside her eyes crinkled. "Yes, James gave me the confidence to start writing again. And he doesn't mind the time I spend on it, as long as it fits in with my other activities."

  Suzie walked over to her sister and embraced her fiercely. "That man is wonderful."

  Laura hugged her back. "You're right about that. Although I'll probably end up over his knee for today." She grimaced. "Then again, I might not. I think I'd prefer a paddled ass over some of the other punishments he comes up with."

  Suzie threw her head back and laughed. Laura looked at her sister a moment and then joined in her amusement.

  After their laughter subsided, Laura looked at Suzie in silence.

  "Oh, oh, you're looking at me like I'm some computer code with a bug in it," Suzie teased, feeling a bit uncomfortable under Laura's scrutiny.

  Laura hummed non-committedly at that remark. "How are you doing?"

  Suzie sighed. "To be honest, I miss Connor, and I might have been a bit harsh. I never really gave him the opportunity to explain why he did what he did." She shook her head. "Talking to James, that day," she didn't have to tell her sister she meant after the breakdown at The Savory Table, "I realized I have a choice to make when it comes to Connor. Forgive and trust him or lose him like I lost Richard."

  There was a long silence and Laura prompted, "And?"

  "I haven't come to a conclusion," Suzie confessed. "Yet."

  Connor sat at the bar at Club Indigo nursing his scotch. It tasted like old socks anyway. He had finished his DM duty half an hour ago. He wasn't sure why he was still here, but he didn't want to return to his empty home. The house kept reminding him of a small but strong brunette with a liking for pain.

  "You look like shit." Jim Cagney accompanied his statement with a slap on Connor's back.

  Connor ignored him. He hadn't seen much of Cagney since he'd uncollared his slave, Monica, and didn't want to see him now, either.

  Cagney settled on the barstool next to him. Asshole couldn't take a hint.

  "I'm not in a very sociable mood, Jim," Connor warned.

  Cagney chuckled. "As if you're ever the chatty kind of guy." He sobered. "No, you aren't talkative, but you've been a bear lately. One that woke up from hibernation with a splinter that's been festering in his paw for three months."

  Connor scowled and didn't react. Jim Cagney wasn't dense. He wouldn't be one of the youngest major crime detectives in Kansas City if he was. He would leave him be.

  "Pining for a woman?"

  Oh, fuck this! Connor turned toward the man beside him with murder in his eyes. But did the man back off? No.

  Jim Cagney didn't flinch or react. He braced his arm on the bar and leveled Connor's scowl with a stare of his own. Connor closed his eyes and shook his head. The man wasn't going to get a rise out of him. It wasn't worth it. Connor started to turn back to the drink he had no intention of drinking. He was halted by a hand on his upper arm. What the fuck? Was the man suicidal? Connor charged at Jim and found himself pressed against the bar with his right arm in a painful hold at his back.

  "I don't want to hurt you, Connor, but I will if I have to. Starting a fight will get you evicted," Jim growled in his ear. "Besides, I was an MP for five years and I know every fighting trick in the book." He paused. "And plenty that aren't."

  Connor conceded and slumped against the bar. What had he been thinking?

  "Fuck, man." Jim pushed away from him. "Defeat doesn't suit you. Talk, buddy."

  To Connor's own astonishment, he did just that. He talked about Suzie and their trust issues. How he kept part of himself hidden from her. Jim sat there and listened. He didn't interrupt or show any emotion. Connor rubbed his hand on the back of his neck and ended his monologue. "I've hurt her and hurt her badly. I'm so sorry about that, and I have no idea how to make amends. I fucking adore that woman."

  "Have you told her that you love her?" The question was innocent enough, but it felt like a punch in the gut. "Fucking idiot," Jim grumbled. "From the look on your face, I don't need an answer to that. Moron!"

  Aye, he was all that and then some.

  "From where I sit, that's the easiest of your problems." Connor's head snapped up at that statement. "You woo her, tell her you're sorry and that you love her. That'll do the job."

  "That's all?" Connor didn't hide his incredulity.

  Jim chuckled. "It might also involve groveling, foot rubs, and bribes. Or maybe with the two of you, a nice long whipping will do." He grunted at the well-placed punch to his upper arm. His hold on Connor had come by surprise, but Jim didn't want to get into a real fight with the man. Even with all his dirty tactics, he might not come out on top, and Connor probably had some tricks up his own sleeve.

  "You mentioned one of the problems is your war history. You were career, right? Did you ever do the counseling thing?" Jim wanted to know.

  "What good would it do?" Connor scoffed. "Taking about shit with some asshole who's never seen action won't bring the guys back or make my dreams less real or let me forget."

  Jim nodded. "I know it won't bring anyone back. But talking can help with some of the other things. A lot." A meaningful silence fell over them.

  Connor frowned. "You went through counseling?"

  Jim nodded. "Yup, every week for almost a year. I did two tours in Iraq, and I was a mess after." They went silent again. Jim signaled Bob, who came over with two beers and cleaned away Connor's forgotten drink. Bob didn't speak but also didn't leave them, and Connor caught a slight nod and eyebrow lift. No fucking way!

  "You counseled him?"

  Bob chuckled. "How do you think Jim found his way to the club?"

  If he wanted to have a chance with Suzie, he had to get control of these demons, didn't he? He straightened and looked Bob in the eye. "When do you have time?"

  Bob took a look at his watch and grimaced. "How about we meet for lunch later today?" Connor looked a bit puzzled; he'd already had lunch. "It's 2:00 am already." Bob chuckled and gave him a card with contact information before he sauntered to the other end of the bar.

  Jim downed the last of his beer and slid off the stool. "Let's clean up the club and head home."

  Connor followed his lead and let the drudgery of cleaning and straightening the rooms take his mind off his sorrows and troubles.

  Bob pushed the plate away and stretched his legs in front of him. For a guy of average height and weight, he sure took up a lot of space. "So you want to talk."

  Connor scowled at the bearded man, who was totally at ease. Bob had eaten his lunch with vigor, so it had probably been good. Connor wouldn't know. He couldn't even tell if he had eaten meat or fish. Hell, it could have been vegan for all he knew.

  "I don't want to, but it looks like maybe I
need to."

  Bob held up his hands in mock surrender but stayed quiet.

  Connor scowled some more. "Fine, ye bastard," he grated. "Yes, I want to talk. I've got issues, and they ruined the best thing I have ever had."

  Bob nodded slowly. "Your relationship with Suzie. I gather you were seeing her outside the club?"

  "More than that. We were eating, sleeping, and almost living together. All that was missing was a collar and a ring." Bob arched an eyebrow, and Connor realized what he had said. "Well, fuck!"

  Connor slumped in his chair. Fuck, indeed. How had he gotten in this deep, this fast? More importantly, how had he been so stupid as to throw it all away? For what? And the most important question of them all, how was he going to make amends?

  The corners of Bob's mouth moved slowly into a smile. "I can see you've found your purpose again."

  "What?" Connor mind was still reeling.

  "You've gone from 'I've fucked up and my life is over' to 'I've fucked up and now I'm going to figure out how to make it right,'" Bob clarified.

  "So what's the next step?"

  "Let's set up a couple of appointments and you talk for a while, and then I'll tell what I think you might do to get yourself straightened out."

  "Just like that?" Connor snapped his fingers.

  "I think you'll find it more challenging than that. Therapy is hard work, but I think you'll find the results worthwhile. You're not afraid of hard work, or you wouldn't have been career army. How many tours did you do in Iraq and Afghanistan?"

  "Eight. Four each. But I don't want to talk about it here in public."