Wickedly Ever After

by Tegan Maher

  I blinked, shocked by the sudden change. “What in the name of Hades is that?” I asked as my heart rate slowed to a safer pace.

  Ari grinned when the dog got up and leaned back on his haunches, tail wagging as he tried to get Tempest to play. “Funny you should put it like that. That’s the angel of mercy’s house. She’s watching Spike while Hades is on vacation in Greece with Hestia and Hera.” He reached across the fence and scratched the ears on the demon dog’s middle head. He lolled his giant tongue out and gave Ari a sloppy lick.

  “Who’s a good boy, huh?” Ari crooned as the dog flopped over on his back to get a belly rub.

  Tempest rolled her eyes in disgust. “I have no idea how anyone ever mistakes me for a dog. They have no pride whatsoever.”

  “Sure they do,” I said, reaching a tentative hand over to give Spike the scratch he was begging for. “They just take pride in different things.”

  “There’s no reason to be proud of fetching a stick,” she said, her nose tipped up. “Especially when it’s not even the right stick half the time.”

  “Don’t be a snob,” I said, smiling as Spike stood up and shook the grass from his back. Six-inch claws dug little divots into the ground as he braced himself then leaned back in a stretch. Between those and his wicked-looking fangs, I was glad he was eager to be buddies.

  “Hades is gonna be irritated when he gets back,” Ari said, giving the dog a final pat on one of his milk jug-sized heads. “He always complains that we ruin Spike for months after he leaves him here.”

  Colin laughed. “I can see where a friendly hellhound would make his life a little rough. Not great for his tough-guy image.”

  “Meh,” Ari said as we turned and continued up the street. “Hades needs a little softening if you ask me. He’s way too intense.”

  We’d stopped at the gate in front of a large, rugged-looking A-frame when some guy I could only describe as a popinjay exited from the pink split-level next door, straightening his pink cravat and smoothing his green pantaloons. Even from there, I could see the run up the back of his black tights when he turned around. I snickered.

  Ari heaved a disgusted sigh when the dude caught sight of us and gave me an arrogant once-over. I resisted the urge to give him the one-fingered salute he’d have generally gotten for being such a pig, but only because I was using my guest manners. Still, I couldn’t hide my look of contempt, and his eyes narrowed and hardened. The coldness in his gaze only lasted for a split second before he masked it, but it was definitely there. Unless I missed my guess, the guy had a mean streak.

  “Ignore him, Des.” Ari said, placing his hand on the door and pausing as it recognized his magic. “He’s a prince of a small nation. Big fish, small pond, and he thinks the sun rises and sets on him, but he plays an important role in history. Or rather, his progeny does.”

  “Him?” I asked in disbelief. “How? By changing the entire tone of men’s fashion by serving as an example of what not to wear?”

  Colin snorted. “If that’s who I have to thank, then let me shake his hand.”

  “No,” Ari replied. “Believe it or not, he’s the great-great, however many greats, grandfather of the guy who invents the roller ball used in modern ink pens.”

  I raised a dubious brow. “And that got him an invite to the ball?”

  A ditzy-looking woman wearing a frilly pink negligee complete with a fuscia boa and feathered kitten pumps opened the door again and twinkled her fingers at him, her long, fake lashes batting.

  I curled my nose and made quiet gagging sounds while Ari gave a tired sigh.

  “No. That got him an invite to the ball. I really wish I would have paid more attention to who was gonna be beside me when we picked our lots.”

  “Who is she?” Colin asked as her door snicked shut.

  “Aphrodite’s great-great-granddaughter, Mitzy,” he replied, pushing the door open.

  “Mitzy?” I asked in disbelief. “Aphrodite—the Goddess of Love—has a grandkid name Mitzy?”

  Ari held up a hand. “I’m not even going there. I thought I’d lucked out when I found out it was Aphrodite because she’s not one to stay in one place too long, plus we have the whole water-guardian thing in common. Then when she started procreating, and her progeny ended up with her ... proclivities but not her selective tastes, I tried to put the place up for trade. No takers, though.”

  “So Mitzy does what ... just sorta jet sets on her grandma’s name and dime?”

  “Pretty much,” he said, motioning us into a large open living area. The place was definitely a bachelor’s pad, but a tasteful, classy one. Lots of wood and cast iron, with a full chef’s kitchen visible in one quarter of the area. Big screen, overstuffed leather sofa—all the good stuff without any of the fluff that would indicate a female presence.

  “Huh,” Colin said. “I met Aphrodite once. She’s sorta terrifying, so that surprises me.”

  “Yeah, it does everybody,” Ari said. “The rest of her offspring are strong, intelligent women just like her. Mitzy’s just proof that even celestial blood can still run sour.”

  He changed into a toga then introduced us to Flannigan, who was much smaller than I thought a phoenix would be.

  “Is that what you’re wearing to the ball?” I asked. I’d never seen him in anything other than board shorts and polos or tank tops, and I had no idea what to expect from this ball.

  He smiled. “Uh, no. This is just something to beat around in while I’m giving you the tour of the city. It’s comfier than pants.”

  I eyed the bedsheet-like garment and bit my lip, doing my best not to ask the obvious question. Colin laughed and Ari looked heavenward, amusement lighting his features. “Just let me answer it upfront so that you’re not wondering about it the whole time. Yes, I’m wearing something underneath it.”

  My face warmed, but I’d be lying if I said that wasn’t the first question that had shot through my mind. I’d always wondered the same thing about kilts until I’d finally asked a group of Scottish werewolves that were regulars at the resort. To my credit, I’d had the good taste and manners to ask their wives rather than the men.

  We spent the next few hours touring the city, and the sense of history amazed me. They had some of the world’s most hallowed artwork on display, many of which were pieces mankind thought long lost. I was grateful to see they weren’t, and also glad they were somewhere safe. We didn’t exactly have a history of preserving treasures.

  “Okay,” he said once we were standing in front of the castle gates again. “The feast starts in a couple hours, so I’ll give you time to freshen up and get ready. If you need anything, just ask your attendant and she’ll take good care of you.”

  “I have an attendant?” I asked.

  “Of course, goofy,” he said, giving me another of his famous duh looks. “You’re a guest in a celestial castle. We don’t expect you to lift a finger unless you want to. If you need more than just her assistance dressing, just ask her. She’ll make sure your needs are met.”

  “Thanks,” I said as Colin opened the door into the same courtyard we’d left through a few hours before.

  Ari smiled then snapped his fingers, disappearing.

  “Can you find the way back to our room?” I asked as we stepped into the cool interior of the castle. I’d been paying more attention to the absolute excess than to the path we’d taken to get to our suite earlier.

  “I’m sure I can,” he said, snaking his arm around my waist and pulling me closer to him.

  “Don’t worry—I’ve got this,” Tempest called over her shoulder, dashing ahead of us with her fluffy white tail twitching. “Follow me.”

  “Lead on, Your Majesty,” I replied, smiling up at Colin.

  I wasn’t sure, but I thought I heard her say, “That’s more like it.”

  We were almost to our room when Mitzy’s squeeze strolled around the corner and stopped in front of the door next to ours. He gave me that gross, disrespectful leer again, obviously i
magining me naked and subservient, and Colin growled. Werewolves were notoriously territorial. He was much more civilized than most, though, plus he knew I didn’t have time for all that chest-thumping crap. I was perfectly capable of taking up for myself.

  However, I did understand his instincts, and also that the man in front of me came from a time when women were property, so I nudged him. “Go ahead. You know you wanna.”

  A smile flitted across his face when he glanced at me, but then the warm chocolate color flickered into a deadly golden glitter in a split second, and I shivered. There was no doubt the man beside me was lethal.

  He gave a low growl and stepped into the man’s bubble, towering over him by a good four inches.

  “That’s twice you’ve disrespected her. If it happens a third time, I’ll pluck your eyes out and eat them.”

  He lifted his left hand in front of his face and twisted it, letting just his fingertips transform into the long, deadly claws of his paw.

  The guy’s Adam’s apple bobbed and his eyes were wide as saucers. “What are you?”

  “Something you’d rather steer clear of,” was all Colin replied.

  Prince Dingdong’s gaze flickered to me and he swallowed again. “My apologies. She’s not worth it.”

  That was sorta the wrong thing to say, but it went to point that the guy had no respect for women whatsoever.

  Colin tilted his head and ran his claw down the guy’s cheek. “That’s where you’re wrong. She’s well worth it to me. She’s worth way more than your life, and you’d do well to remember that.” He gave him just the tiniest nick on the chin before retracting his claws and straightening the guy’s cravat. He paused and gave the guy a feral smile. “Are we in accord?”

  “We are, sir.”

  That feeling you get when somebody’s behind you tingled and I shifted to see who it was. Another man dressed in similar but much more tasteful fashion was approaching. The man was stunning. Tall, with dark hair and broad shoulders and chest that tapered to what I was sure would be a full six-pack of abs. His hosiery clung to well-defined leg muscles.

  His full lips turned up into a good-natured grin.

  “Making friends again, Albert? You seem to do that everywhere you go.”

  He turned to Colin and I. “Pardon my brother. No matter how many times he finds himself on the wrong end of a knife or fist, he doesn’t seem to learn. Allow me to introduce myself. I’m Prince Alexander.”

  I’m not the swoony type, but if I were, I surely would have when he picked up my hand and kissed my fingertips. I noticed his gaze held no lechery—it was just friendly.

  Colin and I introduced ourselves.

  “Your brother is treading dangerous waters,” Colin said. “He can only mess with the lion so many times before he gets the teeth.”

  Alexander bent his head. “As I’ve told him more times than I can count. He’s my younger brother. So far, I’ve managed to save him from himself, but I fear his day will come.”

  Albert snorted. “I suppose I should try to be more like you, big brother. Always the hero.”

  There was an undertone there that gave me the feeling there was more to the statement than what was obvious on the surface, but that was the way it always was with siblings. I didn’t figure it mattered which time period you were from.

  Alexander’s eyes darkened and disgust flitted quickly across his features. “Perhaps life would be easier for you if you learned some discretion.”

  That easy smile returned, but I couldn’t help but wonder what I’d glimpsed between them.

  “It was a pleasure to meet you both,” Alexander said, “but I’m sure you’re in as big a rush as we are to prepare for the ball. Perhaps we’ll see you there.”

  Colin returned his smile, but not with nearly the same level of enthusiasm. “Perhaps.”

  With that, he pushed open the door to our suite and waited for Tempest and me to enter first.

  “Well that was certainly interesting,” she said as she hopped onto my bed. “I think I’m glad we don’t live in those times. You’d spend half your time cursing people, and I’d spend half mine keeping you off the stake.”

  I spotted a silver serving tray covered by a domed lid sitting on a side table and lifted the lid. A wide array of fruits, veggies, and cheeses sat on the tray, and I plucked a grape from the middle.

  “You’re probably right,” I said, popping it into my mouth. “Plus I’m not sure the biome could support that many frogs.”

  “That’s so cliché,” she said, jumping onto my shoulder so she could see what all was on the platter. “I don’t know why it’s your go-to threat. You’re so much better than that.”

  I lifted the shoulder she wasn’t sitting on as I handed her a chunk of pineapple. “It’s what people understand. No need to rock the boat.”

  “Maybe,” she said, her tone distracted. In the presence of food, her stomach tended to override her brain, not that I could say much.

  “Well do me a favor, at least,” Colin said. “Avoid him. We don’t need to go looking for trouble.”

  And yet, it always seemed to find us, anyway.

  Chapter 7

  Since we still had almost two hours before the feast started, we decided to take a power nap. Before I knew it, somebody was knocking at the door. Colin was instantly awake and on his feet before I could even sit up. I stumbled over to open it and was surprised to find a pretty woman wearing what appeared to be a uniform of sorts even though it was more elegant than anything I owned.

  “Hello,” she said, smiling at me. “My name’s Althea. I’m here to help you dress.”

  “Uh, hello, Althea,” I replied, yawning and stepping back to let her in. “I’m Destiny and this is Colin.”

  “It’s a pleasure to meet you both.” She looked around the room expectantly. “Where’s your dress?”

  “Oh,” I said, frowning and motioning to the settee where I’d tossed the bag. “It’s over there in my bag. I forgot to take it out and hang it up.” I worried my lip. Satin was notorious for wrinkling, and the last thing I wanted to do was show up looking like I’d just stepped out of an envelope. Lucy would kill me if word got back to her.

  “No worries,” she replied, waving a dismissive hand as she strode toward the settee. “I’ll set it to order in no time. Do you require assistance too, Mr. Colin?”

  He shook his head. “No, thanks. I’ll get out of your way, though. Des, can you dig my clothes out for me?”

  Althea was gazing at the settee, her brow furrowed. “I’m sorry, Miss, but where’s the dress again?”

  I smiled and picked up the well-worn backpack. “It’s in here. Let me get his stuff out, since I packed it last.”

  “You have everything both of you need for a formal ball in there?”

  “Sure enough,” I said, shoving my arm into the backpack clear to the shoulder. “I hate carrying luggage.”

  Her eyes widened as I pulled out his tux and shoes, then his cosmetic bag, and handed them to him.

  “That’s ... impressive.” She stepped closer and tried to peer into it as I pulled out the garment gag that held my gown and draped it over the back of the settee.

  I pressed my lips together and furrowed my brow, digging around for my shoes. I really needed to put some shelves in there.

  “Ah, here they are.” I tossed first one ballet flat then the other onto the floor, then reached back in for my makeup caddy.

  She shook her head. “I’d pay good gold for one of those. I’ve worked here for almost a millennium and have never seen the like.”

  I shrugged and smiled at her. “If you bring me a bag, I’ll gladly spell it for you. I don’t know how I ever got by without it.”

  “Let’s get you dressed first, but I’ll surely do that. I’ll just leave it here for you while you’re at the ball. I’ll be the envy of all my coworkers!”

  Happy to have made her happy, I pulled the gown from the garment bag. Surprisingly, there wasn’t a single wrinkle
in it, and it still shimmered with magic.

  She gasped. “That’s one of the most beautiful creations I’ve ever seen. Surely you must be royalty.” Her eyes flew to mine and she dipped into a curtsy. “I’m sorry, Miss. They didn’t tell me.”

  “Not even close,” I said, touching her on the arm. “I’m just blessed to have a generous, extremely gifted friend.”

  “That you are,” she said, running her hand down the skirt of the gown in awe. “Now let’s get you ready. I think we should do your hair and makeup before you put that on.”

  “Oh, I don’t think I’ll need more than just some lip gloss,” I said. “My mask takes up most of my face.”

  I took a seat on a small chair in front of a vanity and spread out everything I’d brought for my hair. She twisted and curled my long, unruly red curls into what I could only describe as a work of art. She managed to get it to do exactly what she wanted, whereas on a good day, the best I could do was try to tame it into something that didn’t resemble a bird’s nest, even using magical products Mila made for me.

  Within twenty minutes, she had it piled high on top of my head with the length of it spilling down my back. She left a few ringlets to frame my face, somehow making it look accidental rather than contrived.

  “I know you said you didn’t need any makeup,” she said, “but let me do just a little.”

  Considering the magic she’d worked on my hair, I figured she knew much more than I did. She rubbed something similar to foundation onto my face, but it was clear, then followed that up with something I assumed was blush or bronzer. To finish, she glossed something onto my lips.

  When she turned me around to look, I was amazed. I couldn’t tell exactly what the difference was because there was no obvious color, but my skin shimmered, giving me a glamorous, magical appearance that I could have never achieved myself. Even the annoying freckles that dusted my cheeks and nose were covered—a feat I’d never been able to accomplish.