Kade

by Knox, Elizabeth

  8

  “In the waves of change, we find our direction.”

  ~Unknown

  Ivy

  “Where on earth are you rushing me to?” I ask, not sure why Kade walked up to me like a man on a mission. He shoved my jacket at me, grabbed my arm, and started tugging me along with him out the front door. As we exit the clubhouse, he lets go of my arm long enough for me to slide on my coat and it’s a good thing he did, considering it’s snowing out here. Instead of replying, he walks up to his truck and gets in.

  I shake my head, place my hand on the handle, and open the door. “What is the matter with you? Did you not hear me talking?”

  Kade turns his head to the right, a confused look dragging across his face. “What? Shit. I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you, babe.”

  I huff, getting in the vehicle and shutting the door behind me. Grabbing the seatbelt, I pull it across my torso and buckle it. “Where are we going? You kind of just dragged me out.”

  “We’re going to head over to my friend Dean’s tattoo shop in town. I suppose that I should’ve asked you about this before, but I really can’t bear the thought of you saying no. Life is priceless, Ivy, and I don’t want to keep waiting. You and I have had undeniable chemistry from that first moment. Why should I keep putting off the inevitable? I want you as my ride or die, to be with me through the thick and thin of life.”

  I furrow my brows together and try to understand what he’s saying. “What are you trying to say?” Honestly, it sounds like some sort of proposal if you ask me. Never have I believed that Kade is the type to propose, instead, he’d do something else, a tradition that has been done time and time again in the MC life.

  “I’m asking you, Ivy, if you’d do me the honor of being my ol’ lady. I don’t think it’s a shock to you that I’m not letting you out of my life. I want this,” he points between the two of us, “We’ve got something special, babe, and no matter what comes our way, I’m not gonna let anything ruin this. I’ve done some serious thinking, Ivy. I wanted to bring it up to you soon but I think today might be the day.”

  “Alright, well . . . do you mind turning the truck on so we can get some heat pumping up in here?” I ask him, wrapping my arms around myself. Living in Montana my entire life, one thing I have always hated is how quickly the snow comes. For over half the year, we have the potential of shoveling, plowing, and staying indoors. Hard to believe it’s the first week in November and it’s already snowing. It’s not out of season, though. Who knows, we may even get a blizzard. Time will tell. “Did you already put chains on the tires?” I ask, depending on his answer, it’ll make me feel a bit better. Driving in the snow turns me into anxiety central.

  Kade quickly turns on the truck and gets the heat flowing. There’s a small bit of snow on the windows and it’ll melt it right off as it hits. “Yep, paid Bull to put them on for me yesterday considering it’s the season. Heard this small storm might combine with another. Ready for me to tell you my idea? I think it’ll really impact our relationship in a good way.”

  I pull my right leg up and set it under my butt, getting a bit more comfortable. At this point, Kade buckles his own seat belt and puts the truck in gear, reversing so we can drive down the lane. He switches to drive and then begins to speak, “I think after all this shit settles down with your Dad and the Bears that we should head down to Vegas. It’ll be different for both of us but I think it’ll give us the opportunity to flourish as a couple and we won’t have to worry about anything. Like my dad constantly hovering over the two of us and judging you.”

  As Kade turns onto the main road, I’m listening closely at what he’s saying. He’s giving us both an option to move away from the one place we’ve only ever called home. But why? Just to appease his father and for us to feel comfortable showing love for one another from afar? I’m not sure how I feel about it. If we move, it would be for us, not for Fist.

  “Do you really want to leave?” I ask, needing to hear the truth from him.

  He glances over at me for a split second before looking back on the road. “Yeah, I feel that it’s best for everyone if we do. You’re always going to be Grizzly’s daughter, babe, and I won’t have you feeling uncomfortable here. You and I are gonna be together until I croak, so my grumpy old dad just needs to accept it. Maybe it’ll be good for us to go to Vegas. It’s not like I’ll be taking the Gavel anyway.”

  He might not be taking the gavel, but wouldn’t Kade be the VP? “Are you not interested in being second in command?”

  He shrugs, “No, not really. I don’t want the extra bullshit and responsibility that comes with that. Dad always said he had plans for me to be the VP, but I don’t think it’s for me and I don’t have any shame in admitting that to him either.”

  “Have you talked to him about this?” I question, and knowing Kade, he most certainly has not.

  “Nah, but I will.”

  “Mhm,” I mumble out, thinking he sure as fuck won’t, but who am I to growl at him about the way he avoids issues. It’s his problem, not mine.

  “So, what do you say? You ready to go on the open road with me and head down to Vegas?” The way he looks at me shows a sparkle in my eye, and it makes me want to try this with him, to have this new beginning.

  “Yeah, I think we should but can I make a small request?”

  “Sure, babe.”

  “We should wait ‘til after Thanksgiving. Raven needs to heal from being shot and I can’t break the news to her that I’m moving almost a thousand miles away. Plus, I think it would be nice if you spent Thanksgiving with your brother and dad before we left.”

  Kade nods, “Yeah, you’re probably right. Who knows, with the way Raven is infatuated with Hawk, she might just tag along with us.” I didn’t think about it until now, but Kade makes a good point. She’s not with her sleazebag of an ex anymore and has talked to me about how she liked Hawk from the moment she met him. I want to laugh because the likelihood that they’ll be a blossoming romance is substantial.

  Kade turns the wheel and goes down another long road. There’s hardly any landscape beside snow-covered fields and the occasional house until we’re at the edge of town. He pulls into a parking space and parks the truck. I chortle, “I must admit. I’m relieved that the Reapers brand by tattoos and not iron.”

  He shakes his head, unbuckling himself, and takes the keys out of the ignition. I follow his lead and get out of the car after unbuckling my seatbelt, shutting the door firmly behind me. Kade grabs my hand and we both walk into the tattoo shop together and I’m thankful it’s heated. Sometimes, our heat craps out on us up here.

  “Hey, Dean!” Kade calls out to a man who looks to be in his early to mid-thirties. He has a beard that must go down to mid-stomach and looks straight up like a Viking. I’m sure if Raven saw him, she might just change her mind about Hawk.

  He comes over to us from the back of the shop. It’s a bit big, and I only see one chair and cart in here, but there is a couch and some sort of door that has a coffee cup on it. I wonder if it leads into a kitchen or some sort of break room. “Hey, Kade. How are you, brother?”

  “I’m doin’ alright, better than usual. I’ve come in hopin’ you wouldn’t be busy. I want you to tat my girl, Ivy.” Kade’s tone is filled with pride, and I don’t miss the way Dean raises a brow at him.

  “Oh, you’re gonna brand her, are ya?” Dean smirks, slapping his hands together. “What are we thinkin’ kids?!”

  “The usual location, we should do something unique.” Kade stops and gives me a look that makes me feel like he’s just thought of the best idea. “How would you feel about a skeleton being held together by ivy vines? It’ll obviously say Property of Kade.”

  “Alright, well let’s come over to my chair and just lift up the back of your shirt and I’ll start getting something drawn up,” Dean says to us, causing me to look over at Kade with nothing but fear.

  “Dean, you can cover up scars, right?”

  Dean is over
a few feet across the shop at some sort of drawing station, “In most cases, I sure can. It depends on if their extremely raised or if the scars are deeply indented. Why?”

  “Ivy has a few scars from an . . . incident and there’s a scar on the bottom of her back.”

  Dean gets up from where he’s sitting and comes over to me, putting his hand at the bottom of my shirt. “Can I take a look?”

  “Yeah,” I tell him and the cool air hits my back.

  “Jesus, do I even want to know what happened?” He runs a finger over my flesh and continues speaking, “Yeah, I can cover these up.”

  My shirt goes back down and I turn my face to look at him, “So, does that mean all of them could be covered?”

  Dean nods, “I really don’t see why not.”

  “Okay.” All of a sudden a brilliant idea hits me. Not only will being claimed by Kade potentially help me with Fist, but I’m going to show my commitment to being his woman right here and now. “Is it possible to do the linework of a Reaper spread across my back today?”

  “It’ll take time, but I can get the simple linework done. Shit. I like this!”

  Kade is sitting down in a chair on the wall a couple of feet next to me. “Are you thinking of covering up your entire body with artwork?”

  “I’m not thinking about it. I’m going to do it.”

  Covering up my scars with tattoos will help give me the ability to not look in the mirror and cringe. I see the scars, the words that are written into my flesh, and want to vomit every single morning. If I can look at myself and see art, I can only imagine how much my self-esteem will go up. I’ll admit, I’m a little bit scared, but I’m terrified of what will happen if I do nothing. Right now, I just need to take baby steps.

  9

  Expectation is a powerful force. Expect the things you want and don’t want.”

  ~Unknown

  Kade

  Ivy and I stayed in Dean’s shop for a little over seven hours before we got back in the truck and headed back. I thought Ivy was going to be the one who asked for a break, but it was actually Dean. His hand started cramping and he suggested we come back in a week to begin working on the rest. I admire Ivy’s decision, to cover her body in beautiful artwork. In my opinion, it’s very fitting. We were chatting in the shop and she wants to start with the back piece and then slowly work her way down to her right sleeve.

  “Do you have any idea what you want there?” I ask her as we turn down the lane that leads back to the club. The snow has piled up to a few inches and thank goodness I spent good money on chains and snow tires.

  “I’m thinking of having my right arm be a garden, but I don’t want color. I strictly want my entire body covered in black. I have this idea that we have a gate towards the bottom of my forearm and it leads into the beautiful flowers and brush. Maybe I can have some sort of flower at the top with a Hummingbird eating out of it.”

  “I think that would be very beautiful.” We pull into the parking lot and I can see someone standing outside of the club. As we get closer, I can see exactly who it is, shocked that the man is here already.

  Ivy narrows her eyes on him and looks over to me quickly. “Do we know him?”

  “Yes, that’s Machk. He’s an old Reaper, who’s now a chief.”

  “A chief?” she asks, obviously confused.

  “Yes. Machk is part of the Blackfeet tribe. He lives out in Western Montana on the reservation but has come here to help us with our problem.”

  “Oh,” Ivy responds, getting out of the truck after I turn it off and pull out the keys. I follow her, exiting the vehicle and shutting the door behind me. The second that fresh air hits my nose, I smell weed. Looks like the old timer hasn’t changed much to me. I remember him as a child, being around the club every now and again. For a time, I think he was a nomad. He would always whisper to me about how the spirit would guide him and tell him where he needed to be. It didn’t make any sense to me back then and it still doesn’t.

  “It’s been a long time,” I say to him as I approach, giving him a manly hug.

  Machk has a stern look on his face and nods. “Yes, it has. Your father told me that you were out and should have been home hours ago. I chose to wait and see you before I went to lay down.”

  “That is kind of you. I apologize for keeping you waiting. I was out in town with my ol’ lady, Ivy. We were out at Dean’s getting her brand,” I tell him. A small porch light illuminates the area enough to where we can see one another’s facial features. Machk looks at her a bit differently, it’s as if he’s analyzing her, or looking at her like she’s out of place. I’m not a big fan of the way he stares and says nothing. It gives me a vibe that makes me want to throttle him.

  Ivy gets a bit uncomfortable because she’s shifting on both of her legs and grabs my arm, “I’m going to go inside and lay down. It’s been a long day.”

  “Alright, I’ll be there in a little while.”

  “Okay, take your time. It looks like you both have a bit to catch up on,” she says with a smile as she walks away and places her hand on the clubhouse door. Ivy opens it and disappears behind the door as it shuts.

  Now that Ivy’s gone, I feel like I can ask him what those stares were for. “Are you doing okay, Machk?”

  “Yes, I’m fine. Why are you asking?” His voice is almost monotone, but a small heightened pitch tells me he wasn’t expecting me to ask.

  I raise a brow, crossing my arms in front of my chest. “The way you were looking at Ivy alarmed me a bit. You’re not the type of man that stares like that, not unless something’s moving around in that head of yours.”

  He’s quiet for a moment before meeting my eyes with his own. The snow continues to come down on top of both of us and he takes another hit of his weed. I shake my head, “I hate that you smoke that. Smells worse than it did when I was a kid.”

  “You must still think it is weed. It’s not, it’s kinnikinnick. You know that this is used to help keep peace between many individuals. In the old times, we would smoke this with other tribes we were at war with. Now, the world has changed and we smoke this with allies and in some situations, our enemies to attempt and keep peace. Things are not as simple as they were in the old days. I wish they could be as simple. Would you like some? The great spirit may cast his shadow over you and provide protection, Kade.”

  I think about telling him no, but what the hell. It’s not like a little extra protection can hurt me right now. I take the blunt from his hand and breathe in the spicy concoction. It’s earthy, smells like sandalwood but has a kick to it. Without any doubt, I think there is some marijuana in this. “A combination of plants make this up, right?” I ask him, searching his expression for answers. It’s a shame he’s mastered the poker face so well.

  “Yes,” he chuckles lowly for a moment before his expression shifts back to what it just was, “Fist told me that Ivy is Cora’s daughter, but she doesn’t look anything like the rest of her family.”

  “Personally, I think it’s a good thing she doesn’t look like them. It’s hard enough on her here as it is. If she were to look identical to her father, she and I would’ve left a long time ago. I’m sure my dad hasn’t left anything out when it comes to his attitudes or opinions towards her.” Every day I still struggle to accept how he’s acting. I only want for him to like her, to see the fact this woman makes me happier than I’ve ever been before.

  “Everyone in her family has blonde hair and blue eyes, her mother, father, and even her brother,” Machk states, more like he’s talking to himself than to me.

  All this does is cause me to question things. Dad said that Machk was close to Ivy’s mother, but how close were they? “You and Cora were friends, weren’t you?”

  Machk’s eyes meet mine, staring at me in a way that makes me feel he knows what I’m insinuating. I hope he doesn’t try to change the subject and will just answer me honestly. “Yes, for a time, we were good friends.”

  “Were you close?” I shift my s
tance and bring my arms back down to my sides.

  “Yes, we were very close.” He takes in a deep breath, grabbing the blunt from my hand and takes a hit. “I know what you’re thinking, but it’s not possible. Yes, she has dark features but I’m not her father. Grizzly is.”

  He’s so quick to shove my thoughts away, but I’m not buying it. “If you want to think that you two aren’t related, fine, but we both know that’s only possible if you never fucked her mother. I think we both know that’s not likely. Bikers and blondes go together like cheeseburgers and fries. When’s the last time you and Cora were around one another?” If he answers this last question, it’ll be the end of it. Depending on his answer, that’ll tell us if it’s even a possibility.

  “I don’t know, Kade. Maybe twenty-four or twenty-five years ago. I know what you’re thinkin’ and it’s not possible. I can’t biologically have my own children. The three that Agnes and I have now were all adopted from the reservation. We tried for years and nothing worked. Fuck, you know why.”

  I remember hearing a story about how Machk went on a run and got shot. He didn’t just get shot in any place, it was straight in the kahunas for him. I don’t know the specifics, but I know he was rushed to the hospital. Things just aren’t adding up for me.

  Machk starts to speak but stops and looks at me for a moment. “How old is she?”

  “She’ll be twenty-four in two weeks,” I say, watching his eyes go wide.

  If my thoughts are right, his accident happened after he was with Cora. I wonder if they were in a relationship before Grizzly was in the picture, or if Cora was cheating on him with Machk. Regardless, I think we’ll find out sooner or later. I just have this feeling that Ivy’s entire life has been nothing but an elaborate lie.

  10

  Your mind is a battlefield, be it’s commander, not it’s soldier.