Defect

by Danielle James

  Clearly, Ezra learned how to do backstrokes first when he lost his virginity. He left me gasping for air and aching in all the right places. I thought I was going to come instantly when I felt his hand around my throat. “Can I choke you, Solana? Do you trust me?”

  “I trust you,” I squeaked out. That’s when he tightened his grip and propped my leg up on the table so he could dig even deeper inside of me. With his free hand, he wrapped his fingers firmly around my waist. The way they dug into my skin would definitely leave bruises. I didn’t care. I’d take all of his bruises. He made me feel so good. Nothing in the world compared.

  Pleasure and pressure filled me up like spools of silk ribbon unraveling. They piled so high I couldn’t handle anymore. I needed to release. When I told Ezra I was about to come, he slowed his strokes and fucked me like he was trying to touch my soul.

  Involuntary tears welled up in my eyes, burning until I let them fall and splash on the table beneath me. I shook when my orgasm rolled over me and I finally released. Ezra came after I did and I felt his heat surge inside the condom.

  God, I hated those things.

  All that cum should have been inside of me.

  You can’t handle a baby right now, Solana.

  “I think I’m going to sleep for ten days when I get home. You’re wearing me the fuck out,” I panted once Ezra pulled out of me.

  “I had a lot of sexual frustration bottled up inside of me after I met you.”

  “Clearly. I thought I wanted you bad…damn, Ezra.”

  “I was dying without touching you. I’m going to make up for it every chance I get.” He leaned over and kissed my lips. I giggled at how soft his touch was compared to how brutally he just fucked me.

  A knock at the front door made both of us straighten up quick. “You stay back here and sage, I’ll see who’s at the door,” I told him rushing to the bathroom. I had to make sure I looked presentable and not like I had the last ten years of my life fucked away.

  I fluffed my hair a little and straightened my crooked dress then I walked over to the door with a smile only to be greeted by Mrs. Fredericks. The smile fell from my lips like a pile of bricks. “Hi, Mrs. Fredericks, how can I help you?” I stood in the doorway so she couldn’t barge inside the studio.

  “Where is Ezra?” She asked, tipping her nose in the air.

  “He’s in the back cleansing the Reiki room.”

  “I need him to come with me. I got off work earlier than I expected and I want him to go to church with me.” I almost laughed in her face but I held myself together.

  “I’ll go get him,” I said politely. Before I turned to walk to the back, Mrs. Fredericks spoke.

  “I don’t think it’s appropriate for you to spend so much time alone with my son.”

  I halted in my stride and turned to face her with my eyes narrowed. “We work together. What are you implying?”

  “I said what I said, Miss Monroe. Ezra is young and impressionable. The only reason he took this job was because he thinks you’re pretty. I don’t think anything about this is appropriate. He spends all his time with you.”

  “Uh huh. Is that all? Are you done?” I asked. It was getting increasingly hard to bite my tongue around this woman.

  “I’m done. I think you need to start looking for someone else to help. I’m not sure I want my son working here much longer.”

  “Isn’t it lovely that Ezra is an adult who can make his own decisions?” I rolled my eyes and went to the back to let him know the warden was looking for him.

  “Why the fuck would she think I’d want to go to church with her. I keep telling her I don’t want to.”

  “Well, you need to go tell her again because she’s standing in my damn studio like she thinks she has power here.”

  “I got it,” he sighed heading to the front. I went with him in case he needed a little push to tell his mother to fuck off. “Ma, what’s up? I know you didn’t think I was going to church with you just because you showed up at my job.”

  “That’s exactly what I think. Let’s go. If all you’re doing is cleaning up, you can spare some time.”

  “I’m working on my tea blends too. I don’t have time to go with you.”

  “Tea? Ezra, what in the world does this woman have you in here doing?”

  “I’m not going,” he said, lifting his eyebrows.

  “I didn’t give you a choice. Let’s go. You need to get from up under her.” She gestured to me.

  “Are you under the impression that something is going on between us?” I asked.

  “I don’t think Ezra understands his little crush isn’t going to get him anywhere. He thinks he can have a normal relationship. He doesn’t understand his limitations.”

  “Look, you can go home. I’m not going to church with you.”

  “I’m not leaving until you come with me.”

  “I’m sorry, you can’t loiter in my studio. You’ll leave or I’ll have the police escort you off my property.” I put my hands on my hips and she glared at me like an angry feral cat. I dared her to stay in my studio against my wishes. I would call the cops in a fucking heartbeat.

  “Ezra, let’s go!” She snapped at him angrily. Every one of my hackles rose in defense of him. I stepped in front of him but he gently moved me to the side.

  “No. I’m not going. You can go. Goodbye.” His voice was strong and unwavering. He stared at his mother for a few beats then he walked back to the Reiki room.

  “Goodbye, Mrs. Fredericks.” I forced a smile but venom dripped from it.

  “I’ll be back after service to pick my son up.”

  “That’s nice.” I waved her out the door and locked it behind her. I gripped my amethyst pendant in my palm and squeezed tight. I was going to need all the fucking strength in the world to deal with her ass.

  …

  EZRA

  I made sure to get up extra early so I wouldn’t be late to Sun Goddess since Solo had a bunch of shit for me to do. I got in the shower and played some old school R&B. Tamia thumped through my speakers while I got ready. It had been so long since I listened to music. It felt good. I didn’t realize how much of myself I lost after the crash. I found pieces of myself along the way though and it made me feel whole.

  I pulled a t-shirt over my head when my bedroom door trembled under my mother’s fist. She walked in and frowned at me. “Turn that mess down, Ezra! Why are you listening to music so early?” For a minute, I had flashbacks of times before the crash when Mom would bang on Everett’s door demanding he turn his rap music down.

  That was before she changed into the woman she was now. Now, I didn’t recognize her. I didn’t want to anymore. “I’m getting ready for work. We’re doing all new inventory so I’m working overtime.” I told her as I grabbed my phone and airpods. Her scrutinizing brown eyes raked over me with disproval in her stare.

  “Overtime? I don’t like all the time you’re spending with her. No matter what you do, she’s not going to be interested in you. Someone like you can’t have a normal relationship. I keep telling you that. Besides, she’s way too old for you.”

  “I’m just trying to go to work, Ma. I don’t have time for this extra shit.” Little did she know, Solana was more than interested in me. She was falling in love with me and I damn sure was falling for her. Shit, I was already in it. There was no more falling for me. Solana was everything.

  She thought I was scared of being in Malachi’s life. She thought I cared about missing out on something. If I wasn’t with her I was missing out. Nothing else came close to her.

  “You need to stay away from her, Ezra. She can’t possibly see anything in you.”

  “Yeah, okay,” I chuckled and moved past her and down the steps. I walked out of the door and across the street when I noticed Solana’s car was still in the driveway.

  “Ezra!” Mom called from the other side of the street. I ignored her and knocked on the door. Solo opened up with a fresh smile and sparkling eyes. Her cocoa
skin glowed in the yellow dress she wore. Her long black hair was braided to one side and hung over her shoulder. She looked like a goddess.

  I knew my mother was watching but I didn’t give a fuck. I wasn’t going to hide the way I felt in front of anyone. I bent down and hugged her tight.

  My sunflower.

  “You okay? Your vibe feels tense.”

  “Look across the street,” I sighed. She stood on her tiptoes and looked around me then rolled her eyes.

  “You know how to make that go away, right?” She closed the front door and put her hands on her hips. “See? Problem solved. Doesn’t she have to go terrorize the people at her job?”

  “Yeah, she’s about to leave.” I pulled Solo into my arms and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “You look beautiful. That’s not what you usually wear to work though.” I slid my hand down her back until I was cupping her ass.

  “We’re not going to work today.” She tossed me the keys to her car and motioned to the door.

  “What are you doing?”

  “I’m giving you the keys to my car. We’re playing hooky. I’ll teach my class at the school later on today and you’ll go to your GED class. It’ll be fine.”

  “What about your classes at the studio.”

  “Ezra Fredericks, don’t worry about my classes. I said we’re playing hooky. I planned this yesterday.”

  “What the fuck?” I muttered, shaking my head. It was always something with that woman. I’d follow her anywhere though. I’d follow her into the sun. “You know I can’t drive.”

  “I don’t know that. You know that. So show me you can’t drive and I’ll take over for you. No problem, no pressure.” She held her hands up and I examined her slender fingers. Something was missing from that fourth one on her left hand.

  I shook the rogue thought from my head and looked down at the keys in my hand. “My mother is going to run after your car on foot if she sees me driving off.”

  “Well, let’s get you in the driver’s seat because I want to see this shit,” Solana’s laugh lit up the entire living room. I couldn’t help leaning down to kiss her. She stroked the side of my face and then she smiled at me.

  Nerves took over my stomach and built a home that reached up to my chest. I hadn’t driven since before the accident and I knew the part of my brain that made decisions was fucked up, which would make driving nearly impossible. In order to drive you had to make one choice after the other.

  “Solo…I don’t know.”

  “Come on, baby. You got this. If you can’t do it, I’ll take over but you’re going to try.” When she pressed her palm to my back, I felt her hand heat up and I shut my eyes. She was always rearranging my energy so that I felt calm.

  “I hope you’re not attached to your car,” I told her as we headed outside. My nosey ass mother was still out there, standing at her car and staring at Solana’s house from across the street. The minute she saw me, she stormed over, stopping in Solana’s driveway. I thought Solo would pop a fucking gasket.

  The way she got angry wasn’t like everyone else. She was still amazingly calm. I felt the frustration pouring off her though. Somewhere along the line, I picked up her ability to read energy like a book. Maybe I just knew her really well but I could tell she was pissed.

  “What are you doing?” Mom snapped when she saw me unlock Solo’s car.

  “I’m going to work,” I lied, getting in the car.

  “You can’t drive, Ezra! I told you that! The doctors told you that!” She looked at Solana and pushed out a puff of air through her flared nostrils. “You can’t let him drive your car. He’s not capable of driving.”

  “Can you please get out of my driveway?”

  “I’ll get out of your driveway when my son gets out of your car.”

  I started the engine and gripped the steering wheel with one hand.

  “No, you’re going to get out of my driveway now.” Solana almost raised her voice. Almost. I knew if my mother was pushing her to that point, it was serious.

  “Yo, Solo, get in the car. Don’t argue with her.” Solana looked at me then looked at my mother. “In the car,” I boomed. She didn’t say another word. She got in the passenger side and looked at me.

  “I know this isn’t the right time, but you’re sexy as fuck when you tell me what to do.” That glint in her pretty eyes was going to get her fucked later on. I loved the way we slipped into our own world no matter what storm was raging outside of us.

  Mom hit the roof of the car and I looked at Solana. “I’m gonna back out. She’s not that stupid.”

  “Go for it.” Solana shrugged. She locked her fingers between mine and gave my hand a squeeze. I threw the tiny yellow tin can in reverse and backed out of the driveway with ease. Mom moved to the side waving her arms in the air. Solana turned to look over her shoulder as I drove down the street then she looked at me with a smile.

  “Well, would you look at that? You’re driving, Ezra.” She was right. I was driving. My brain wasn’t short-circuiting. I didn’t have headaches or fuzzy thoughts. It was like I’d never stopped driving.

  “Shit. I am.”

  “How do you feel?” She rubbed my shoulder.

  “Nervous as hell. Being in cars makes me nervous anyway though.”

  “I understand that.” She leaned over and kissed my cheek. “You’re doing an amazing job.”

  “Can I ask you where the hell we’re going, Solo?”

  “Oh, yeah. We’re going to Inglewood.” We came to a stop at a red light and I used the opportunity to look at her like she’d lost her mind.

  “What the hell do you mean we’re going to Inglewood?” She didn’t respond she just put the GPS on her phone.

  “Starting route to Centinela Hospital, Inglewood.” I blinked at the GPS and then looked at Solana again.

  “That’s where I was after the accident.”

  “I know. Drive please.” She rubbed my arm and I followed the GPS’s directions.

  “Are you gonna tell me why we’re going to the hospital?” I asked after a few silent minutes passed.

  “Nope. Drive, please.” I learned not to push her when she got like that. She was never rude but when she dug her heels into the ground she was stubborn as hell. I loved it but it got on my damn nerves.

  We arrived at Centinela Hospital thirty minutes later and I felt more nerves spring to life in my stomach. I didn’t want to see that place anymore. It brought back too many memories. It was where I found out Everett was dead.

  “Come on, Ezra,” Solana touched the back of my neck and I shook my head.

  “I can’t do this shit, Solo.”

  “You can. Let’s go.” I wouldn’t budge though.

  “Ezra, hold this.” She took her amethyst necklace off and placed it in my hand then laid her hands over my heart. I waited to feel the warmth. When I felt it, I was able breathe normally. She moved down my chest until she got to my stomach then she moved back up. She repeated those motions until her hands went from warm to hot and the fog in my brain started to lift. The storm clouds cleared and I felt calm.

  “Better?” She glowed even though I knew she was pulling energy from herself to give me. I nodded and she smiled at me. “Let’s go. We have an appointment. It was hard as fuck to get, so let’s keep it.”

  “An appointment for what?” I was still clueless. I looked back at the yellow bug when I got out, amazed that I drove all the way from Radcliff to Inglewood with no issues.

  “Come on.” She pulled me by the hand and we walked into the building. The smell hit me hard. Antiseptic and astringent. My chest ached with painful memories. I wanted to turn around and leave without looking back. The only thing that kept me grounded was Solana’s hand on mine.

  The energy that sparked between us kept me levelheaded. It kept me walking with her through the lobby and over to the elevators. Once we were alone behind closed elevator doors, she laid against me and I kissed the top of her head.

  “I don’t know wha
t the fuck you’re planning and it’s making me nervous.”

  “Don’t be nervous.” She wrapped her arms around me and I hugged her back.

  The elevator let us off on the neurology and brain trauma floor. My heart slammed against my chest and I looked down at this tiny woman walking beside me.

  What the fuck was she planning?

  We finally came to an office and Solana knocked on the closed door before looking at me. I realized she was waiting for me to notice something. I read the plaque on the door and saw that we were there to see Dr. Chin.

  “Ezra, nice to see you again. At least you’re not being admitted this time, right?” He grinned and shook my hand then welcomed us into his office.

  “Nice to see you again, Dr. Chin,” I nodded. I had to get over the shock of seeing him quickly because I knew exactly what Solana’s aim was.

  “So, your beautiful girlfriend asked for an emergency meeting. She said you’d been having some issues related to your injury. Honestly, I’m surprised. You’re about two months out. You should be healing well. Granted, you’d be healing much faster if you ever came to the recovery therapy sessions I scheduled for you but that’s beside the point now. What’s the matter?” My brain tried to process everything he threw at me but it was hard. I tackled the thing that stood out the most.

  “Did you say…recovery therapy?” I asked, leaning forward in my seat.

  “Yes. When you left the hospital, I sent you home with a sheet that had eight follow up appointments listed. I needed to take more pictures of your brain to see how the healing process was going and to help you further recover.”

  “Dr. Chin, I didn’t know anything about that. My mother handled all my paperwork. She never mentioned it to me.” Dr. Chin’s dark eyes narrowed a little then he typed in a few things on his computer. Solana reached over and held my hand for support and I gave hers a squeeze.

  “My office has called several times to reschedule but never got an answer. I explained to your mother that you’d need recovery therapy to speed along the healing process.”

  “Healing?” I said rubbing my forehead. “I’m able to recover from the brain trauma?” I was starting to get a headache but not because there was an overload of information. I was getting a headache because I was livid with my mother.