Bean's Heart (Hearts of ICARUS Book 7)

by Phillips, Laura Jo

  “We certainly did a good job of impressing her,” he said after closing the door all the way. “She thinks we’re bullies. I despise bullies and it makes me sick to think our behavior was such that she thinks that of us.”

  “After the way we treated her--mostly me-- I can’t say I blame her,” Zach said.

  “I agree,” Zain said. “I almost can’t believe that we didn’t ask a single question about the people we’re supposed to save, but we didn’t.”

  “No, we didn’t.” Zander’s head went back, his eyes fixed unseeingly on the ceiling. “I wonder what it is she’s supposed to do that’ll save the Thousand Worlds.”

  “I wonder what threatens the Thousand Worlds,” Zach said.

  “I wonder why she won’t be on this ship for the return trip,” Zain said.

  “I think we’re going to have to prove to her that we have more honor and manners than she thinks,” Zach said. “If we do, in fact, have more than she thinks.”

  “Why would you say that?” Zain asked in surprise.

  “Because, as you just pointed out, she’s right. Everything she said is right. All we’ve thought about since Prince Trey told us about this mission is how great it will look on our record, how fantastic it is to get a field promotion and higher security clearance, how far we’ve come in such a short time. Tell me you wondered why those Kinahns need to be saved? Even for just one moment.”

  “No, I didn’t,” Zain admitted.

  “She’s right to call us bullies, too. I tried to intimidate her, though I honestly don’t know why. I’ve never treated a woman that way in my life. We were inexcusably rude to her, too, and we’ve never done that to a woman, either. We were raised better than that. I don’t even want to imagine how our parents would’ve reacted if they’d seen us.”

  “She’s also right that we should have paid more attention to the fact that we needed higher security clearances,” Zander said. “I kept trying to rush her along like this is a routine freighter run or something. I didn’t understand the looks I kept getting from her, but I sure do now.”

  “She doesn’t think we can handle this mission, and after our treatment of her, I agree. I think we should bow out of this, Zander,” Zach said.

  “I agree,” Zain put in quickly. “We obviously don’t have what it takes for something of this magnitude. We’ve already failed several of Prince Garen’s orders and we haven’t been on this ship two hours yet.”

  “You may be right, but I gave my oath that we wouldn’t change our minds, and I’m not breaking it. If we lack what it takes to get this mission done, then we best start digging until we find it. And we best start using some of those manners our mother taught us, too. From the way XO Sark and the other officers on the bridge were looking at us, I don’t think it’d be a good idea to treat Lady BreeAnna with disrespect again.”

  ***

  That evening Bean left her stateroom, locked the door behind her, and headed up the corridor to the elevator bay. She pressed the call button just as the sound of doors closing down the corridor reached her. The thought of coming face to face with the Falcorans again made her want to cry, and she’d done enough of that while in the shower earlier. Without a moment’s hesitation she opened the stairwell door and stepped inside.

  “What are you doing?” Iffon asked.

  She glanced down at her hand and shrugged as she started up the stairs, feeling half foolish and half relieved. “I don’t want to share an elevator with them so I’m taking the stairs instead.”

  “Understandable,” Iffon said as he began unmelding. She held her arm motionless, waiting for him to finish.

  “Climbing two flights of stairs to avoid the Falcorans feels foolish. And cowardly. I’m just not up to facing them tonight.”

  Fully free of Bean’s skin, Iffon shook his feathers and hopped up onto her shoulder. “You needn’t explain yourself to me, Bean. I understand how you feel since I feel the same way.”

  Bean gave him a little smile and finished her climb. She left the stairwell in time to see the Falcorans entering the cafeteria. She hung back a little, watching through the plasti-glass wall that fronted the cafeteria. When she saw them crossing to the back she went inside, chose a small table next to the wall and sat down. In less than a minute a waiter approached.

  “Good evening, Bean, Iffon.”

  “Hello Rich,” Bean said, offering the older, silver haired waiter one of her rare, genuine smiles. “How’s your day going?”

  “Pretty good, thanks. Yours?”

  “Long.”

  Rich smiled. “Drinks?”

  “Iced tea for me, please.”

  “I’d like some cool water, please, no ice,” Iffon said, allowing the waiter to hear him for the first time.

  Rich stared at the big red and blue bird in surprise. Then he looked at Bean, eyebrows raised. “Did I just…did he just…was that…real?”

  “Yes, he’s real, Rich, and intelligent. He also talks, and is capable of choosing who he allows to hear him.”

  “I see,” Rich said. He looked at Iffon again and shrugged lightly. “In that case, it’s good to meet you for real, Iffon.”

  “Thank you, Rich. It’s good to meet you, as well.”

  “I’ll just go get that water, no ice, and your iced tea while you decide what you’d like to order.”

  While Rich went to get their drinks Bean and Iffon discussed what they wanted for dinner. After they each gave Rich their order, Bean reached into her pocket and removed Iffon’s water dish and a food dish with a deep rim that he preferred to use because it prevented his food from sliding away the way it did on a plate. She unfolded a paper napkin and set the dishes on top of it in front of her place setting.

  “What do you feel like doing tonight?”

  “I don’t know,” Bean replied. “Nothing that requires much brain power.”

  “You’re tired.”

  “I am,” she admitted. Before she could say anything else, Kyrus Bearen approached their table.

  “Hello, Bean, Iffon,” he said in a deep, rumbling bass.

  “Hi Kyrus,” they both replied at the same time. Bean wondered at the serious expression on the usually jovial Bearen’s face. “What’s wrong?”

  “Sark told me about the first few minutes of your meeting with the new Commanders this morning.”

  “I don’t think the Falcorans and I hit it off very well. It’s not important.”

  “Did they insult you or say anything inappropriate?”

  “No, they didn’t,” Bean said. They’d insulted her a couple of times, but not in the way he meant. Even if they had, she doubted she’d tell Kyrus about it. Bearens were generally the slowest to anger, but when they did get angry, it wasn’t pretty. She’d had more than her fill of drama for one day. “There’s nothing to be concerned about Kyrus.”

  “If there is, you need to tell me, Ausreba.”

  “I will.”

  “Iffon?” he asked, arching a brow at the large bird.

  “Don’t worry, Kyrus. I’ll tattle if I need to.”

  “Excellent,” Kyrus said, satisfied. He saw the waiter approaching with their food so he nodded, told them to enjoy their dinner, and left.

  “That was fun,” Bean said with a sigh before Rich reached their table. He set a steaming plate of food in front of Bean, and hesitated before setting Iffon’s beside hers. Bean smiled and thanked him even though her appetite had suddenly vanished.

  “That smells good,” Iffon said while Bean loaded his dish.

  “Yes, it does,” Bean agreed half-heartedly. She waited until Iffon was busy eating before sneaking a quick glance at the Falcorans near the back of the cafeteria. They sat alone, their heads down as they ate their dinners. As far as she could tell they weren’t even talking to each other which seemed odd to her for some reason. They looked so alone, which made her sad. When Zander lifted his head she immediately dropped her eyes to her dinner and kept them there.

  Even though she didn’t
look in their direction again for the rest of the evening, she never stopped thinking about them for a moment. She tried to, but they just wouldn’t get out of her head no matter what she did. When they got up and left the cafeteria she felt them just a little as they crossed the room. Once she could no longer feel them, she looked up through the transparent wall and watched as they went through the doorway, walked up the corridor, and entered the stairwell.

  She looked at Iffon, not surprised to find him watching her. “I wish there was a way to turn this off.”

  “Is that possible?”

  “No,” Bean replied with a sigh as she pushed her barely touched dinner aside.

  ***

  “Is it just me or are we getting dirty looks from everyone, particularly the other male-sets?” Zain asked as they made their way down the stairs after dinner.

  “It’s not just you,” Zander said.

  “Is it because of Lady BreeAnna?” Zain asked. “Maybe she told everyone how rude we were to her.”

  “No, that’s not it,” Zander said. “If she had, I’m sure several male-sets would have challenged us by now.”

  “We weren’t that rude to her,” Zain said dismissively.

  “Yes, we were,” Zander said, his tone brooking no argument. Then he sighed a little. “This is the other thing.”

  “Oh,” Zain said. “I’d forgotten about that.”

  “Since everyone on the Shadow knows the truth, or enough of it, we haven’t had to deal with this for a long time now,” Zach said. “Looks like we’re going to have to start all over.”

  “Any suggestions as to who we start with?” Zander asked.

  “The Bearens in charge of security, and our new XO,” Zain replied reluctantly.

  “That should do it,” Zach agreed. “Do we have that memory crystal with us that we used the last time?”

  “Yes, I have it,” Zander replied. He pushed the stairwell door open and started up the corridor, pausing outside the room they all knew belonged to Lady BreeAnna. “I wonder why she hasn’t reacted to us?”

  “I’ve been thinking about that,” Zach said. “Doc told us we’d have to wait for our medication to wear off before we’d react to her, and since we had no idea she’d be here, we already took it this morning. I think that might have something to do with it. Maybe we’re not putting out any pheromones for her to react to.”

  Zander looked at Zach in surprise, wondering why he hadn’t thought of that. He turned and went to the door of his room across the corridor, gesturing to his brothers to follow him. Once they were inside and the door was locked, he went to the closet for his duffle bag and carried it to the table.

  “I think you may be on to something, Zach, but since Doc mixes it up specifically for us, we can’t look it up on the vid terminal to see if you’re right.” He unzipped the bag and reached inside, then paused and turned to face his brothers. “We should send Doc a message and ask him, but we have to do it soon. Tomorrow we’ll be jumping to Marrazo and it’ll take too long to get a response after that. Assuming this jump line ever moves.”

  “Good idea,” Zach said. “I’ll do that before I turn in.”

  “It sounds like the two of you have already decided to stop your meds,” Zain said quietly.

  “Yes, we have,” Zander said with some surprise. “Do you object?”

  “It’s not that I object. I just think we should get to know her a little before we take a step that will change all of our lives, hers included.”

  “She’s our berezi, Zain. The one woman meant for us, as we are meant for her. If not for the meds we take, we wouldn’t even have a choice to make.”

  “Maybe not, but the fact is that we do have a choice, luckily, and I think we should take advantage of that.”

  “Why luckily?” Zander asked.

  “You saw how cold she was. I’ve seen warmer ice cubes.”

  “You said that before,” Zach pointed out. “I’m not sure why you think that, though. She was insulted, she was hurt, and she was deeply disappointed, all for very good reasons. But she wasn’t cold.”

  “I disagree,” Zain said mildly.

  “You don’t like her?” Zach asked.

  “I don’t know her, and neither do you.”

  “I understand your hesitation,” Zander said, turning back to his duffle bag and pulling out a small leather case. “It was your name more than ours that got dragged through the mud. But you can’t blame all females for what one did.”

  “I don’t blame all females for what happened,” Zain said defensively. “I never have, either. I’m just wary of them now that I know what they’re capable of.”

  Zander frowned as he studied his youngest brother. Then he sighed. “You’re still angry that we didn’t release the truth to the public.”

  Zain took time to search his feelings before shaking his head. “No, I don’t think that I am. I admit that, at times like this, when we’re forced to relive the whole mess again, I can’t help but wish we’d chosen differently.”

  “I can’t blame you for that,” Zach said. “I wish the same thing sometimes. Don’t you, Zander?”

  “No, I don’t,” Zander replied. “I think our honor would have taken a worse hit had we released that recording publicly than it did without it. She wasn’t well in the head, which was obvious. She was sent to a mental health facility where she remains to this day.”

  “I know,” Zain and Zach both said at the same time.

  Zander opened the small bag in his hands and dug around inside before pulling out a memory crystal. “This is it.” He set the bag aside and put the memory crystal on the table next to it.

  “Give me the crystal, Zander,” Zain said. “I’ll make copies and give one to Kyrus and one to Sark tonight.”

  “It doesn’t have to be done now,” Zander objected. “It’s been a long day.”

  “It has, but I’m not going to sleep for a while anyway.”

  Zander nodded and handed him the memory crystal. After both of his brothers left he locked his door and looked around, too preoccupied to take pleasure in the large, beautifully furnished room. After a few minutes he went into the bathroom to get ready for bed.

  ***

  Zain placed the memory crystals he’d just made in one pocket and left his stateroom. He passed the door to Lady BreeAnna’s room, unable to prevent the quick thrill that ran through him. He pushed it down. Hard.

  BreeAnna Lobo was beautiful, he couldn’t deny that. She also appeared to have the saddest eyes he’d ever seen in his life. Key word; appeared. He’d been wondering ever since their morning meeting if it had been a well-practiced expression, or a trick of the light. He rejected the possibility that her sadness was sincere. There was no reason he could think of for a woman like her to truly be sad.

  He knew his brothers were already convinced she was their berezi. But he wasn’t so sure. He’d sensed the emotions behind the cold, empty mask she presented despite what he’d told his brothers. But he didn’t know why she hid her emotions, or why she’d been chosen to brief them, or why she knew as much as she did, or why she was even on the Askara.

  There were far too many questions, and far too few answers. The fact that the answers to those questions were most likely none of his business didn’t alter his concerns in the slightest. Until they knew a lot more about her than they did, he wasn’t going to allow her to sink her hooks into him.

  He was surprised and troubled by how easily she’d ensnared Zander and Zach. They’d always been more cautious than him. That they were acting so differently about this one woman only made him more determined to hold himself back. He was, in truth, glad to do it. He owed his brothers that much, at the very least.

  He left the stairwell and approached the transparent wall of the cafeteria, relieved to see that the Bearens were still there. Even better, Sark was sitting with them. He entered and walked straight toward them.

  Kyrus looked up, a wary look in his dark eyes. When he started to stand up in or
der to salute as protocol demanded, Zain shook his head. He reached into his pocket and removed the memory crystals.

  “You have questions,” he said, setting one crystal in front of Kyrus and the other in front of Sark. “There’re your answers.”

  Kyrus looked from the crystal to Zain, but instead of skeptical, he looked thoughtful. Zain took that as a good sign.

  “This is appreciated, Commander.”

  “All I ask is that you watch all of it.” Kyrus dipped his head in agreement, and Sark did the same.

  “I take it that you’d like us to share this afterward?” Sark asked.

  “We have an important mission ahead of us,” Zain said. “If we need to spread our business around in order to settle people down and get on with it, then that’s what we’re willing to do.” Zain shrugged. “I’m not saying we like it, but we do understand it. In your places, we’d want answers, too.”

  “I appreciate this, Zain,” Kyrus said. “This says a lot.”

  “Thanks, Kyrus,” Zain said. “If you have questions after seeing that, let us know. We’ll answer them as well as we can.”

  “We’ll do that,” Kyrus said with a deep nod of respect. Zain returned it, bid them goodnight, and left the cafeteria. He felt good about how well that went. Hopefully, things would be different by morning.

  Chapter 12

  37 days to deadline…

  The next morning the Falcorans went to the rec deck, looking forward to using the weapons sparring room. Like the Askara herself, it was big and brand new. It also had a great floor with just enough give.

  Zander was surprised when Kyrus Bearen approached them as soon as they left the stairwell. “Good morning, Commanders. I’d like a few moments of your time, if you don’t mind.”

  “Good morning Kyrus,” Zander said. “Lead the way.”

  Kyrus nodded, then moved up the corridor to one of several martial arts training rooms. They stepped inside, not surprised to find Kasper and Kashton as well as Sark already inside. Kyrus closed the door and the shutters over the viewing window.

  “The first thing we want to do is apologize to the three of you for jumping to the wrong conclusions,” Kyrus said. “We did you a disservice.”