Bean's Heart (Hearts of ICARUS Book 7)

by Phillips, Laura Jo

  “I don’t think she’s comfortable with stressful or emotional situations. The more you pushed her, the more tense she became.”

  “I wasn’t pushing her,” Zain said. “I just asked a few questions.”

  Zander turned to face his youngest brother. “We’re no stupider than she is, Zain. You attempted to command her. We all agreed before she arrived that we wouldn’t do that again. Not just because it’s rude, but also because we don’t have the right. You broke our agreement, which doesn’t sit well with me. In addition, we’re attempting to make up for our treatment of her yesterday, which makes your behavior even more unacceptable.”

  “I know, and I apologize. I just got…frustrated.”

  “Don’t do it again, frustrated or not. Too much is at stake here for any one of us to cater to personal whims.”

  Zain nodded. “Understood.”

  Zander stared at him for another moment, then nodded. “Back to her tension. You didn’t sense it?”

  “No, I didn’t.”

  Zander turned to Zach. “What about you? Did you feel her tension?”

  “Wait, you felt her tension?” Zain asked.

  Zander nodded, his eyes still on Zach who was thinking carefully about his answer. “I didn’t consciously feel her tension. But I did feel as though we needed to go a little easier on her.”

  “I apologize, Commanders,” Kyrus said, approaching from behind Zach. “I didn’t intend to eavesdrop, but I couldn’t help hearing what you just said, Zach. If you’re talking about Bean, then I’d like to say that yes, you should try to go easy on her.”

  “Why?” Zain asked, earning frowns all around. “I don’t mean it like that. I just wonder if there’s something wrong with her.”

  “I’m not sure what you’re implying, Commander, but there is nothing wrong with Lady BreeAnna Lobo,” Kyrus said stiffly.

  “I apologize, Kyrus, I didn’t mean it like that, either.”

  Kyrus nodded just enough to accept the apology, then turned to Zander. “What do you know about her?”

  “Her name,” Zander replied. “We also know who her parents are. That’s about it. Oh, and that she’s telekinetic and has a very interesting companion. Guardian. Bird creature. Whatever he is. We tried to find more information, but her profile is security locked.”

  Kyrus wasn’t at all surprised by that. He thought a moment, then nodded toward the conference room. Zander immediately turned, opened the door, and led the way back inside. This time they all stood in a small circle rather than sitting. They couldn’t take too much time since everyone was waiting to create their first Door.

  “She helped a lot with the preparations for this mission and in the process, most of us got to know her,” Kyrus said. “Because of that, I know a few things about her.”

  “What did she do to help?” Zain asked, trying hard not to scoff.

  “Whatever needed to be done,” Kyrus said, eyeing him coolly. “She helped make up about four thousand beds, and worked with a team stocking the bathrooms and kitchens. She’s good with computers, so she helped program some of the security protocols, and she spent a couple of weeks weeding through mountains of job applications for service personnel. She also worked closely with Captain Reynolds, our Princes, the council, and the man who rebuilt and modified the Jumper on this ship to plot our course.”

  “That’s a broad range of tasks,” Zach said, impressed. “What else can you tell us?”

  “She’s not a fighter or protector like most Lobos. She teaches third grade on Sheara 3.” The Falcorans were obviously surprised at that. “That doesn’t mean she’s a delicate little flower who’ll wilt at the first sign of trouble, though. She’s as brave as they come and cool under pressure, though for some reason she doesn’t recognize that in herself. She’s also smarter than anyone I know.” He shrugged. “I’ve heard that Vari’s the smartest of them, but I don’t know her.”

  “During yesterday and today’s meeting she kept her eyes down a great deal of the time,” Zain said, being a lot more careful with his words and tone now. “Initially I thought she was shy, but from some of the things she’s said I no longer think that’s the case.”

  “Yes, I know what you mean, and no, she’s not shy,” Kyrus agreed. “I’m not sure why she does that, though I strongly suspect that there’s a specific reason for it. She isn’t comfortable in social situations, and it takes her a while to warm up to people, so maybe that has something to do with it. She also avoids conflict and drama whenever and wherever possible.”

  “You mentioned that she’s brave,” Zach said. “Since she’s a schoolteacher, and a non-combatant, I’m curious as to why you’d say that.”

  “If not for her, the Nomen attack would have had far different results.” Kyrus looked at them, but they could only stare blankly back. “You don’t know about that, obviously.”

  “No, we don’t.”

  Kyrus told them about the attack. When he mentioned Nomen with blue skin, the Falcorans were surprised.

  “Why would a Nomen have blue skin?” Zander asked.

  “It’s a genetic enhancement that gives the recipient some of the Doftles’ qualities, like skin that can’t be penetrated with anything we know of other than Kunian steel.”

  “Merde,” Zander said.

  “Exactly,” Kyrus said, nodding. “Unfortunately, none of us bothered to bring Kunian steel weapons to the bridge with us. Except for Bean.”

  “She was armed?”

  “She’s always armed, Commander,” Kyrus said. “It’s not obvious, but never doubt that she has several weapons at hand at all times.” He finished telling them about the Nomen, and how Bean had killed the second one.

  “Is that the attack Captain Reynolds died during?” Zach asked.

  “Yes,” Kyrus said. “Dr. Gregg said it was a stroke caused by a rise in blood pressure. I think when he saw that last Nomen heading for Bean, and knew he had no way to stop him, it caused a spike that killed him.” He shook his head slowly. “Bean was fantastic. You could tell she wanted to bawl all over the place, but she didn’t. She handled the situation with all the dignity that man deserved. No one else on the bridge could have done it better.” Kyrus grinned. “Then she asked if we’d mind retrieving her weapons for her, minus the eye gunk.”

  “Eye gunk?” Zach asked.

  “Yeah,” Kyrus said with a chuckle. “She definitely lightened the mood a bit, and we still get a kick out of it, but only in the fondest way. And we did return her weapons to her minus all traces of eye gunk.”

  “What weapons did she use?” Zach asked.

  “I’m afraid that’s her secret to tell, Commander. Not mine. She asked us to keep it to ourselves and we all agreed. One thing I will tell you is that she doesn’t get how brave she was, or how extraordinary it was that she stood fast in the face of that Nomen’s charge. I don’t know why, but I know it’s not false modesty on her part.”

  Chapter 13

  After breakfast the next morning Bean met with the Falcorans to tell them the true story of what happened to Princess Rayne. The first thing she noticed when she entered the conference room was that the tingling sensation running from her neck to the base of her spine was a little bit stronger. The second thing she noticed was that there was something different about the Falcorans. She tried to identify it, but it was so subtle and elusive that she couldn’t.

  Whatever it was, it took all of her concentration to ignore it while she spoke. She kept to the facts, didn’t elaborate, and didn’t reveal anything they didn’t need to know, or that was above their security clearance.

  The next day she told them about Princess Salene finding the Doftles’ storage planets, and the hybrids, filling them in on information that hadn’t been generally released. The tingling sensation was no stronger than the previous day, but the elusive something she’d sensed the day before was. She still couldn’t identify it, but not long after the meeting ended she realized that she’d been a bit more relaxed in their p
resence than the previous day, and that confused her.

  After running five miles on the treadmill at a faster speed than usual, and spending an hour soaking in the bathtub, all the while trying to figure out why, it finally came to her. She’d been more sensitive to Zander’s and Zach’s feelings. Not a lot, but enough that it gave her insight into some of the things they said that had initially bothered her.

  The phenomenon was limited to Zander and Zach, though. Her feelings toward Zain did not improve. In fact, each time he spoke to her, usually slipping in a thinly veiled barb or challenge, her dislike and distrust of him increased exponentially.

  The third day of being in the conference room with them was the worst because from the moment she walked in the door, a shiver ran down her spine in place of the tingling sensation. And it was far too pleasurable for her peace of mind.

  Her sensitivity to Zander’s and Zach’s feelings, though still faint, was noticeably stronger as well. That was the day she told them about Vari, and she felt their surprise, their anger, and their concern as she spoke. It required all of her skill to hide her own emotions and reactions from them which, all by itself, was surprising. But she still sensed no more of Zain than she had the first day she’d met him.

  The gradual increase in her ability to feel her Rami over a period of several days would’ve been unusual enough for her to wonder about it. But it wouldn’t have really mattered all that much in the overall scheme of things. That she only felt two of them was what troubled and confounded her.

  It was a puzzle that nagged at her increasingly over the course of those three days, but one she couldn’t find an answer to. The night before their fourth and final meeting she found herself pacing her room instead of sleeping. She mentally reviewed each meeting with them as close to moment by moment as she could remember, but it wasn’t helping any more than it had the other dozen or so times she’d done it.

  “You need to get some sleep, Bean,” Iffon said from a swinging perch hanging from the ceiling.

  “I can’t. Each day the feelings I get when I’m around them get stronger. Since I don’t feel anything until I’m within about ten feet of them, I won’t have any idea what’s coming until I get hit with it. I don’t want to step into that meeting room tomorrow until I have at least some idea of what to expect.”

  “Let’s talk through it then.”

  “All right, maybe that will help.” She thought a moment. “I know that I’m their berezi. I know it. But the first day I met them, I got nothing from them. I didn’t sense their emotions, and I had no physical reaction to them at all. I could feel their presence so long as they were within a few feet of me, but no more than that.

  “Now, each time I’m with them, I sense Zander and Zach a little more strongly. I feel them a little more strongly. I still have no physical response though, and what I do feel comes only from them. Not Zain.”

  “Physical response?”

  Bean’s face heated, but she answered the question. “I’m talking about a sexual response. Arousal or physical attraction.” She frowned. “Actually, that’s not exactly true. I felt a faint tingling sensation the first day which has grown stronger each day.”

  Iffon nodded, not even noticing her embarrassment. “You told me about pheromone suppressants the other day. Is it possible they could be taking them?”

  Bean stopped pacing and turned to stare at Iffon without moving for a long time. Iffon remained still and quiet, knowing that she was sorting through her memories and what knowledge she had on the subject, and that movement from him would interrupt the process.

  “I think that might be it, Iffon,” she said finally. “Sort of. They couldn’t be taking the same suppressants since men and women have different body chemistries. But, if a pheromone suppressant can be made for young Klanaren women who aren’t ready to be claimed, why can’t a similar suppressant be made for males?”

  “I suppose,” Iffon said doubtfully.

  “You suppose?” she asked in surprise. “It was your idea.”

  “That’s when I thought they could take the same drug already made for females. It makes no sense to me that a separate drug would be created for males.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because it’s my understanding that Clan males want to find their berezis.”

  “Older males who’ve been waiting centuries for their berezi usually feel that way, it’s true. But younger males, like the Falcorans, might find the idea of being saddled with an Arima less than desirable.”

  “Why wouldn’t they?”

  “For one thing, having an Arima would restrict their ability to accept long term missions unless they could take her along, which I can’t see them being happy about. Dangerous missions wouldn't even be offered to them.”

  “Why not?”

  “Over the past twenty years a large number of male-sets have found their Arimas and had children. But there were very few Klanaren left by the time the Princes found Aunt Lari. Even though human women were able to have male children, Klanaren were growing closer and closer to extinction by the year.

  “Many children have been born since then, but we still have a long way to go. A soul-linked male set capable of fathering both male and female children would never be put at risk under less than dire circumstances.”

  “You believe the Falcorans would want to take on dangerous missions which could put their lives at risk?”

  “Absolutely,” Bean said. “They’re exceptionally young to have risen so far within the military, so we know they’re ambitious.”

  “Wait,” Iffon interrupted. “Why within the military, specifically?”

  “The skills and experience that a male-set needs to rise in the military are much more stringent than outside of it. For example, Princess Salene’s male-set, the Gryphons, are only about one hundred and thirty years old. Practically teenagers for male Klanaren. They spent time in the military when they were younger, but they’re not in the military now. They have their own ship and, until after the Doftles got hold of them, they worked for their Clan. I seriously doubt that any male-set that young would have their own command in the military.”

  “I see,” Iffon said. “Please continue.”

  “The Falcorans are older than the Gryphons, but they’re still young. It’s clear they intend to rise as high as they can, as quickly as they can. I’m not implying there’s anything wrong with that because there isn’t. In fact, it’s impressive. My point is simply that the restrictions a woman and family would place on them at this stage of their careers would bring their rapid rise to a grinding halt.”

  Iffon considered what she’d said for a few moments, then nodded his head slowly. “Your theory seems sound to me, Bean. Assuming you’re correct, how does that fit with the feelings you’ve been experiencing, and those you haven’t?”

  “Good question,” she said, frowning as she began to pace again. “What if they are taking a suppressant, and they know I’m their berezi. If I know it, I see no reason they wouldn’t. And what if, because of that, Zander and Zach decided to stop taking them.”

  “If they wish to rise in their career, why would they stop taking them?”

  “Because there is a big difference between the idea of an unknown hypothetical female standing in the way of your future plans, and an actual flesh and blood berezi standing right in front of you.”

  “Excellent point,” Iffon said. “If you’re right, it means that Zain didn’t stop taking his suppressants.”

  “That’s right.”

  “Wait, there is a flaw in your logic.”

  “Which is what?”

  “You said you’ve had no physical reaction to them. But if Zander and Zach stopped taking suppressants, then shouldn’t you have a response to them, at least?”

  “Yes, I should,” she said. “But if I’m right, and they’ve stopped taking a suppressant, that would explain the gradual increase in my ability to sense them. Maybe a physical response will occur once their suppress
ants wear off a bit more.”

  “What about them? Will they have a response to you?”

  “No,” she replied. “Or maybe yes. I don’t really know enough about their biology or what they may be doing or taking to answer that. I do know that they can only have a sexual reaction to their berezi after their mating fangs descend, and that the mating fangs can’t descend in one of them if they aren’t all three capable of having the reaction.”

  Once again Bean stopped her pacing as a thought blossomed in her mind. A thought that hurt so much that it took her breath away for a few moments.

  “Bean? What’s wrong?”

  Bean tried to swallow but found that her mouth was too dry. She went to the chiller, removed a bottle of juice and struggled with shaking hands to get the cap off. She poured some into a glass, then sipped it while fighting for her composure.

  “Do you remember what I told you about young Klanaren males and their ability to have sex with whoever they want before they mature?”

  “Yes, I remember.”

  “Well, another little fact that goes along with that is that until they mature, a male-set can’t identify their berezi.”

  “I’m not sure I understand.”

  “When a mature male-set catches the scent of their berezi, or more specifically, her pheromones, their mating fangs descend. But there’s no reaction at all in males who have not matured. They could have sex with the woman who would one day be their berezi and neither she, nor they, would ever be aware of their destined connection.”

  “All right,” Iffon said slowly. “Since I can’t see how that applies to this situation, I assume there’s more to this.”

  “I’m not a doctor or scientist and I’m certainly not an expert on male Klanaren physiology,” Bean said. “But, what if taking suppressants causes a male’s body to revert to the state it was in before maturation? And what if that made it possible for them to have sex at will, just as any young immature male-set can?”

  “That would certainly explain the rumors concerning their sexual exploits.”

  “Yes, it certainly would,” Bean said, hating that she felt like crying. She reminded herself firmly that none of this, true or not, had anything to do with her. It wasn’t helping very much though.