Finding Hannah

by Fiona McCallum

  ‘I thought we’d lost you.’ Hannah frowned again as she tried to figure out what he was talking about.

  ‘You look well,’ he said, holding her back and scrutinising her. She blushed a little more.

  ‘I think you have the wrong person,’ she said. ‘I’m Hannah Ainsley – we have met a couple of times, with your dog, but …’

  ‘At the park. Yes, I know. Though, I didn’t know your name. Hannah, that’s nice.’

  ‘Er, thanks.’ What the hell is going on here? ‘I’m here for a checkup. Well, not me exactly. Are you Doctor Walker?’ she said, lost for something else to say.

  ‘No, that’s my colleague. I’m Doctor Shaw, Pete,’ he said, holding out his hand for her to shake. ‘Sorry, you must think I’m really weird,’ he said as if he’d just noticed her perplexed expression. He’s really quite cute, she was startled to find herself thinking.

  ‘Let me explain.’ Oh please do.

  ‘We’ve discovered Charlie here seems to have a knack for detecting people suffering from terminal cancer – reacting just like he did with you those two times. So, you see, I was really worried for you.’

  ‘I’m fine. And not suffering from cancer – terminal or otherwise,’ she said brightly.

  ‘That’s great to hear. He must have just taken a shine to you for some reason, then.’ He frowned slightly as if thinking that was odd.

  ‘Maybe he gravitates towards non-animal people too.’

  ‘That’s right, I remember you saying you’re not an animal person. So what are you doing at a vet clinic? And if I’m not mistaken, that’s the sound of a cat and kittens,’ he said with a laugh, pointing at the carry box that was now emitting various squeaks and meows.

  ‘Yes, well, I’m new at all this. I’ve never owned a pet before in my life and have never wanted to. They turned up looking wet and miserable and I took pity on them because it was Christmas Day.’

  ‘And after two days you couldn’t think of your home and life without them in it, right?’

  ‘Yes, I’ve been well and truly suckered in,’ she said with a laugh.

  ‘Lucky kitties, and I’m sure you’ll have lots of fun and happy times together. Thank goodness Charlie got it wrong and you’re okay.’

  ‘You know, maybe he didn’t – well, not completely. At the time I did feel like I was dying – from grief,’ Hannah said quietly, sitting down again. ‘Perhaps he was picking up on my sadness.’

  ‘Oh?’ Pete sat down next to her.

  ‘I had recently lost my husband and both parents in a car accident.’

  ‘God, that’s terrible. Um, not the accident involving the truck? On Christmas Day last year?’

  ‘Yes. That’s the one.’

  ‘I’m so sorry.’

  ‘Thanks. It took quite a while to pick myself up, but I’m doing much better now,’ she said. ‘And these guys are certainly helping by giving me a new focus.’

  ‘Yes, there’s nothing like needing to care for someone else to drag you up out of the doldrums. I lost my wife six months before you lost your family – cancer.’

  ‘I’m so sorry.’ God, she must have been very young.

  ‘Thanks. You learn to muddle through, don’t you?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘I have a patient to see now, and I have no idea if it’s too soon for you, or if you’d even be interested, but I’d really like to get to know you a little better, Hannah. Would it be okay with you if I got your details off the system and gave you a call sometime? Perhaps we could go out for a coffee, or a drink, or a meal. Sorry, I’m clearly terrible at this. It’s been a long time since I …’ he said, wringing his hands together.

  ‘I know what you mean. Me too. And, okay, yes, since I’ve already had your dog slobbering all over me, it would be nice to get to know you too,’ Hannah said, smiling at him.

  ‘Great. Brilliant.’

  The next moment they were interrupted by the sound of a door opening and then a female voice.

  ‘Holly and Lucky and Squeak?’

  ‘Yes,’ Hannah said, getting up. ‘I look forward to seeing you again,’ she said to Pete, gave him another beaming smile, touched his arm and rubbed Charlie’s ears briefly before picking up the box and walking towards where Doctor Walker stood waiting for her.

  Hannah couldn’t wipe the grin from her face and the warm feeling from her heart. Though she also felt a little jittery as she waited to find out if there was any formal record of Holly’s existence.

  She held her breath as the scanner was passed over the perfectly well-behaved cat, and then her day became even better when she learned there was no microchip implanted. Hannah was free to keep her, along with her kittens – discovered to be both little boys. Even better, all three were declared fit and healthy.

  Pete was nowhere in sight when Hannah paid the bill for the consult and bags and tins of cat and kitten food and a few cat toys and booked Holly in to be de-sexed in a few weeks when the kittens were weaned. The little boys had to wait a bit longer for the snip. She’d taken her time, but couldn’t hover any longer without it looking odd, so she left. She was just in her car and about to turn her key in the ignition when her mobile dinged. The number was unfamiliar. She read the text.

  Hi Hannah. Really looking forward to catching up again sometime. Let me know when suits. Cheers, Pete (& Charlie)

  ‘Oh,’ Hannah said, staring at the message. ‘What do we think about this, Holly girl?’

  Hannah sat staring at the phone trying to think of how to reply. Thanks, I’ll let you know, didn’t seem at all adequate. But it was what came to mind. She sat for a few moments longer. And then a strange feeling came over her.

  ‘Sorry, guys, change of plans.’ She stuffed her phone back in her handbag and threw it over her shoulder as she got out. She collected the carry box from the passenger side and went back inside the vet clinic.

  Pete was standing at the reception desk looking at something on the computer. He glanced up.

  ‘Hannah. Hi.’

  ‘Do you have a minute?’ she said, beginning to blush under his gaze.

  ‘Sure, come on back here,’ he said, standing aside. ‘Have a seat,’ he said when she was in what looked like the staff tea room. Hannah was glad to, suddenly her legs were beginning to shake. He closed the door and sat with his hands loosely in his lap. ‘Is everything okay?’

  ‘Yes. Good. Sorry, I’m getting flustered.’

  ‘I sent you a text.’

  ‘Thanks, yes, I saw it.’

  ‘And …?’

  ‘Well, the thing is … God, this is really hard.’

  ‘It’s okay, Hannah, take your time. Just tell me what’s on your mind,’ he said kindly.

  ‘I’m not going to be calling or texting you to catch up. I’ve changed my mind and I wanted to tell you in person.’ Shit, too harsh, Hannah. She took a deep breath. ‘You see, the thing is, I’m not ready to start dating. You seem nice, you really do and it’s lovely to have met you, but … Sorry.’

  ‘You don’t have to be sorry, Hannah. If you’re not ready, you’re not ready. Only you can know. But, I’d be happy to take things slow, get to know each other as friends and see where it leads. There wouldn’t be any pressure.’

  ‘But I think there would be. As you said, you’re that bit further along than me. Every time we met you’d be wondering if I’m ready or when things are going to change between us. God, I’m rambling like an idiot. The truth is, and I never thought I’d hear myself say this in a million years, but I need more time on my own. It just hit me, really. Anyway, I wanted to tell you in person,’ she added with a shrug and got up. ‘I’m sorry.’

  ‘It’s okay, Hannah, really,’ he said, standing up too. ‘I admire your strength. It took some serious guts to come in here and tell me to my face. I appreciate that.’

  ‘Thanks. I wish you all the best. I really do.’ Hannah was surprised to find herself leaning in and giving him a kiss on the cheek.

  ‘The same goes from m
e. I hope one day we’ll meet again, Hannah, and you’ll feel differently. But I promise I won’t be sitting around hoping or waiting for your call,’ he said, smiling at her.

  ‘Great. Thanks.’ Hannah smiled at him and went to leave. She knew she’d done the right thing, but still she ached a little with disappointment.

  ‘Um, Hannah? I think you’ve forgotten something,’ Pete said. She froze and turned back. He had his eyebrows raised and was smirking and pointing at the carry box sitting on the floor.

  ‘Oh my god. Fine pet owner I am!’ she said with a laugh and blushed furiously. ‘Sorry, kitties,’ she said sheepishly to the box as she reached down and grabbed the handle. ‘Bye, Pete.’

  Chapter Thirty-two

  Hannah’s doorbell rang at eight o’clock on New Year’s Eve.

  ‘Auntie Beth, it’s so good to see you,’ she said. ‘How was the trip?’

  ‘Wonderful, but very similar to the last one. One cruise is very much like another – good, but still … More to the point, how were your travels?’

  ‘Great. I really enjoyed it. I’ll tell you all about it, but first you’ll never guess what has happened. Come in.’

  ‘Is everything okay? I got your note on my door asking me to come over. I’m sorry I’m so late – the ship was delayed coming into port and then a few of us went out for a bite to eat before heading home. I hope I haven’t held you up.’

  ‘No, not at all. I’m still talking myself into going out to Caitlin’s party, actually. Anyway, come through. Cup of tea? I’ve just boiled the kettle.’

  ‘Oh, yes, please.’

  ‘I’m not sure if you’ve caught up with how much rain we’ve had. Sam came by and checked we weren’t being flooded and I’ve been keeping a close eye on everything,’ Hannah said as she organised the tea.

  ‘That’s very thoughtful of you both, and very much appreciated. Did my outside drain hold up okay?’

  ‘It was blocked when I first checked, but it’s been fine since.’

  ‘Thank goodness for that.’

  ‘Here we are,’ Hannah said, putting down the mugs of tea. ‘I also have some melting moment biscuits if you’d like one.’

  ‘Oh, that would hit the spot. It’s wonderful to see you so chipper, dear. And you’re practically glowing. Now, what is it you’re so keen to tell me. But do please sit, you’re making my head spin.’

  ‘Sorry,’ Hannah said, and settled on a stool. ‘You’ll never guess what happened here on Christmas morning. I got back to find …’

  ‘Hang on, you were meant to be in New York for Christmas.’

  ‘I came home early. I’ll tell you all about that in a bit, but the thing is …’

  Right at that moment Holly walked in and went straight over to Beth and rubbed on her leg.

  ‘Oh. Hello there.’

  ‘Auntie Beth, this is Holly,’ Hannah said, getting off her stool and picking up the cat.

  ‘Hello, Holly,’ the old lady said, reaching over and stroking the cat. ‘Aren’t you just lovely?’

  ‘She is – and so are her two darling little kittens.’

  ‘Don’t tell me you’ve agreed to do some pet sitting.’

  ‘No. You’re looking at a newly crowned pet owner.’

  ‘Golly. Really?’

  ‘Yes. Don’t look so startled.’

  ‘Well, it is quite a turn up for the books.’

  ‘I’ve been reformed, thanks to Holly. She appeared at the door completely soaked through and bedraggled, and with two of the tiniest kittens in tow. You should have seen the state they were in. I just couldn’t say no.’

  ‘Good for you, darling,’ Beth said. ‘Yes, it’s very hard to resist when they choose you.’

  ‘I understand that now – I never did before. But it’s such a powerful force. This really was meant to be. She’s a huge comfort and has given me such a boost. You know, I think she’s done more for me in a few days than I could ever do in a lifetime for her.’

  ‘You really have seen the light, haven’t you?’

  ‘Yep. Scary cat lady in one fell swoop,’ Hannah said with a laugh.

  ‘I think you’re far from that, dear. At least she’s small. Can I have a hold?’

  ‘Of course. You don’t mind, do you, Holly?’ Hannah kissed the cat on the head and handed her over.

  ‘Aren’t you just the sweetest thing?’ Beth said as Holly snuggled into her chest. ‘Oh, I’ve so missed having a pet.’

  ‘I know you have. Auntie Beth?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘You know how you’ve said before that you can’t get another dog because you’d hate for it to be taken away if something happened to you?’

  ‘I couldn’t bear it. At my age, there’s every likelihood a pet will outlive me or I might end up having to move somewhere I can’t have one. Sadly, these are the realities of old age, my dear,’ she said with a sigh.

  ‘If you want to get another dog, Auntie Beth, I promise it will have a home forever here with me if anything happens.’

  Beth peered at Hannah.

  ‘I mean it.’

  ‘That’s a very generous offer.’

  ‘And a genuine one. I’m serious, Auntie Beth.’

  ‘But a dog would mean picking up poo in public, Hannah.’

  ‘I know. I never thought I’d be cleaning out a litter box either, but I do now. And I haven’t gagged once!’

  ‘You have a lovely purr, Holly,’ Beth said.

  ‘Auntie Beth, the offer is there.’

  ‘Thank you, darling. I have to admit I have been pining quite of late for a furry companion. You know, maybe I’ll go to the RSPCA tomorrow if they’re open and see what they have. But right now, Holly, you have to show me your kittens – I just know they’re gorgeous. Maybe you’ll turn me into a cat person too.’

  ‘My offer would still stand. Come on, then,’ Hannah said, getting up and leading the way.

  ‘Oh, I think my heart just melted,’ Beth said, bending down to look at the kittens nestled in the box as Holly rubbed against her legs. ‘I don’t think I can leave them. They’re just so darned cute.’

  ‘Exactly. Why do you think I’m still here and not off at Caitlin’s fancy dress party?’ Hannah laughed.

  ‘Oh. Yes. That’s right. I forgot about it being New Year’s Eve there for a moment. You go. I’ll stay and babysit.’

  ‘Would you? I know it’s silly of me to be so attached to them.’

  ‘Darling, it’s quite all right. And the pleasure would be mine.’

  ‘It would only be for a few hours – just long enough to see the New Year in. I really would like to go, actually.’

  ‘Well, that’s settled, then. Do you have something to wear? I hope you’re going to dress up.’

  ‘What do you think about me going as a black cat? Black leggings, black t-shirt and ballet flats, with a tail and ears that I’ve made.’

  ‘Perfect.’

  ‘I’ll wait and pin the tail on when I get there – it would be too uncomfortable to wear while I’m driving – but can you help with my ears?’

  ‘Of course. And you’re going to need a black nose and some whiskers. I can do that for you with eyeliner, but we’d better get cracking. Oh, what fun!’

  ‘You know, Auntie Beth,’ Hannah said, looking at the old lady in the bathroom mirror, ‘I think I’m going to be okay. I didn’t think so there for a while, but now I’m sure.’

  ‘I know you’re going to be okay. You are okay. You’ve survived, now you’re going to thrive,’ Beth said. ‘Oh, darling, I’m so proud of you.’

  ‘I’m even a little excited to see what the future holds.’

  Acknowledgements

  Many thanks to Sue, Annabel, Adam, Cristina, Michelle, James, and everyone at Harlequin Australia for turning my manuscripts into beautiful books and for continuing to make my dreams come true. Huge thanks also to editor Bernadette Foley for her kindness, valuable insights and guiding hand to bring out the best in my writing and Hannah’s stor
y.

  Thank you to the media outlets, bloggers, reviewers, librarians, booksellers, and readers for all the amazing support. It really does mean so much to me to hear of people enjoying my stories and connecting with my characters.

  Many thanks to the members of the South Australia and Victoria police forces who very patiently answered my many questions and helped make procedural aspects as authentic as possible. Any errors are my own or down to taking creative liberties.

  Finally, huge thanks to Carole and Ken Wetherby, Mel Sabeeney, NEL, and WTC for continuing to provide so much love and encouragement, and for being the best friends a person could ever hope to have. I am truly blessed.

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  First Published 2017

  First Australian Paperback Edition 2017

  ISBN 978 148922060 8

  FINDING HANNAH

  © 2017 by Fiona McCallum

  Australian Copyright 2017

  New Zealand Copyright 2017

  Except for use in any review, the reproduction or utilisation of this work in whole or in part in any form by any electronic, mechanical or other means, now known or hereafter invented, including xerography, photocopying and recording, or in any information storage or retrieval system, is forbidden without the permission of the publisher.

  This book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, resold, hired out or otherwise circulated without the prior consent of the publisher in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

  All rights reserved including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.