Love Everlasting

by Jerrica Knight-Catania

  “Ever had one?” he asked me.

  “Never. And now I feel as if I’ve been deprived my entire life.”

  Liam laughed and we walked to the counter together. “Two fried Oreos, please.” He paid again, and I started to wonder if he was just being nice or if he expected something in return. Should I be offering to pay? “Prepare to have your mind blown.”

  Thoughts of the money flew from my head, and all I could do was smile goofily at him and say, “Okay.”

  “Hey, lover boy! Here ya go!”

  Liam spun around and retrieved the paper basket of Oreos from the vendor. We started walking slowly down the boardwalk again while our treats cooled a bit. No one said anything, but the silence was comfortable. I knew I was being a romantic, but this really had turned out to be a great night after all. The moonlit walk, the carnival ride, the fried Oreo, which was heavenly. Maybe now he would take me out to the beach and kiss me passionately under the moon.

  “That moan must mean you like the Oreo.”

  I snapped from my daydream. Oh, God. Had I really moaned out loud? Sure the Oreo was amazing, but the moan was a result of something else entirely. “Um, yeah. It’s incredible!”

  “Wanna go down to the beach?” he asked, and I wondered if he had been reading my mind.

  “Sure. Sounds great.” We tossed the paper basket and made our way to one of the short, wooden staircases that led to the beach. I slipped off my sandals and Liam kicked off his sneakers before we descended to the sand.

  I felt like I was in an episode of Saved by the Bell all of a sudden—one of the melodramatic scenes between Zack and Kelly during their summer at the beach club.

  We slowed as we approached the shore and then stood side by side, staring out at the water.

  “You excited to start rehearsals tomorrow?” he finally asked.

  “Yeah, I think it’s gonna be a great show.”

  He turned to me and moved a little closer. “Me too.”

  Oh, God. This was it. He was going to kiss me!

  “There you two are!”

  Damn it! I opened my eyes to see Liam had backed up and turned toward Kelly, who stood right behind us on the sand.

  “It’s getting late,” she said. “We’re all heading back.”

  I looked at my watch, saddened to see just how late it was. Almost midnight. I’d be lucky to fit in six hours of sleep before rehearsal in the morning. But if Liam had asked me to, I would have stayed there all night, talking to him and kissing him. Unfortunately, I was the DD.

  “Yeah, we’re coming,” he said, and then turned to me. “Mind if I ride with you?”

  “Not at all,” I said.

  “I call shotgun!” Kelly shouted.

  I wasn’t sure if I should be annoyed or not. Was she trying to sabotage Liam and me before anything even started? Or was she simply oblivious that anything was going on? Or maybe she was just incredibly drunk. I didn’t know her well enough to tell the difference, but I was certain I’d be able to figure it out more easily in the light of day. Unless she was one of those annoying people who didn’t get hangovers.

  Kelly chattered on the entire way back to the theater housing, and when we pulled up in the parking lot, everyone was congregated there, saying goodnight. I had hoped to linger behind and say a more private goodnight to Liam, but Kelly grabbed my arm and led me up the stairs before I had the chance. From the third floor landing, I looked down to see Liam was staring up at me. I smiled and waved, and he gave me a wink. I fell asleep that night feeling giddy for the first time in a very long time.

  *

  Morning came way too early the next day. By the time Kelly had exhausted her tongue, it was one-thirty in the morning, but I had to get up at seven-thirty to make sure I was warmed up in time for rehearsal. I didn’t want to sound like a bullfrog on the first day.

  The theater was on the other side of the pool, and I headed there with fifteen minutes to spare. Liam sat at the far end of the front row of chairs that had been set up in front of the piano. I headed toward him, but was intercepted by the music director.

  “Hey, Melissa,” he said. “I was hoping we could take a look at Moonshine Lullaby for a quick minute.”

  Oh, no. Was he really going to make me sing solo this early in the morning with Liam looking on? I thought I’d have a bit more time and maybe some ensemble numbers first. But of course, I couldn’t say no.

  “Sure,” I replied. I shot a glance at Liam as I walked toward the piano. He smiled and sat forward in his seat.

  My palms sweat as I opened my musical score to the correct song. The music started, and my heart accelerated as I waited for my entrance. Then the music stopped.

  “Melissa?”

  Damn! “Sorry,” I said, realizing that I’d missed my entrance. When he started again, I focused my attention fully on the music and tried to block Liam from my mind completely. I came in this time, and thankfully, I didn’t sound like a cat in heat.

  Halfway through the song, the music director stopped and closed the score. “Great,” he said. “That’s all I needed. Okay, everybody, let’s warm up.”

  I went to the seat next to Liam and sat down. While we sang a series of la-la-la-la-las, he gave me a little nudge. I looked at him, and he gave me the thumbs up sign. I smiled back, feeling really good about myself. But it didn’t last long.

  “Alright, everyone! Good morning!” The director stood before us, his glasses perched on the end of his nose as he scanned the room. “Most of you are going to work on the opening number with the choreographer this morning, here in the theater. I’m going to take Frank and Annie with me.”

  Liam and I stood in response to our characters’ names and followed the director to the rehearsal space next door. Once we had tossed our stuff into a corner, we waited to find out what we’d be working on.

  “Hey, guys,” the director said. “I wanted to start with the last scene of the show, actually.”

  Oh, no. I didn’t dare look at Liam.

  The director continued, “I want to make sure we solidify your on-stage chemistry, and there’s no better way to do that than to force you into the romantic scene first thing.”

  Little did he know that chemistry would not be a problem for us. Still, I wished we had gotten to share that kiss the night before. Now our first kiss would be a part of our scene work.

  “From the top of the scene.”

  We started running the lines. The director interjected here and there with a little stage direction, but not much was needed. We mostly spent the entire scene in an embrace. By the time we reached the kiss, I was a nervous wreck. Somewhere in the course of the scene, I’d started to wonder about whether or not I had brushed my teeth well enough that morning. Did I have coffee breath? Was there a blueberry in my teeth from my muffin? But it didn’t really matter. We would have to kiss no matter what.

  Liam reached his hand up to my cheek and searched my face. He looked first into my eyes, then dropped his gaze to my lips, before leaning in for the kiss. Our lips had barely touched when the director stopped us.

  Damn! Why were we always being foiled?

  “Sorry, Liam. Can you take a little less time getting to the kiss? I’d like to see it be a little more urgent.”

  Liam smiled and turned to me. “I’m sure I can handle that.” Then, without preamble, he grabbed the back of my head and gently, but urgently, pressed his lips to mine. It was nothing short of magical. I wasn’t sure how long the kiss should go on, but it seemed neither one of us wanted to stop. Our tongues mingled in a decidedly non-stage kiss, and when we finally came up for air, we both turned to the director with sheepish expressions.

  “Well,” he said. “Clearly chemistry is not an issue here.”

  *

  We never made an official statement, but Liam and I carried on what I liked to refer to as a torrid love affair during the run of the show. Everyone else called it a “showmance.” I was loath to call it that, though, because showmances rarely
worked out, and I didn’t want to think about the day that Liam and I might part ways. I knew how unpredictable the life of actors could be, and until I decided to give up the Broadway ghost, I probably wouldn’t be able to maintain a steady—and certainly not healthy— relationship.

  But I didn’t care to think about that then. All that mattered in the world was Liam, and I was quickly falling in love with him. I tried not to, but it happened anyway. I supposed part of it had to do with my character falling in love with him every night.

  *

  “Can you believe we only have two more shows left?” Kelly asked as she packed away some of her clothes in her suitcase.

  It was Saturday afternoon. We had a show that night, and a matinee the next afternoon. Then it would be over, and we’d all be headed back home. Back to the grind of grueling auditions.

  “Yeah, crazy,” I said as I did a bit of my own packing.

  “So, are you and Liam gonna try to keep things going in New York?”

  I had wondered the same thing many times. We hadn’t talked about it, and I knew we probably should. But part of me was afraid of his answer. What if he had only seen this as a showmance? What if he had no intention of continuing our relationship once we were home? I couldn’t face that reality, so it was better to be non-committal.

  “Oh, I don’t know,” I said nonchalantly. “I guess we’ll see what happens.”

  After the show that night, we all went back to the bar in town that had become our main hangout during the run of the show. Spirits were high, and everyone let loose, knowing we only had one more performance to go. I was having more trouble than the others letting loose, though. This could mark the end of one of the happiest times of my life.

  Liam and I hung close together that evening. Even when we were talking with other cast members, we remained attached at the hip.

  “I’ve gotta run to the bathroom,” he said to me at one point. “I’ll be right back.”

  “Don’t fall in!” I joked, and then let go of his hand.

  I finished my beer while he was gone and realized I could use a bathroom break myself. I headed toward the little hallway that housed the grimy one-seater toilets and collided with a couple caught in a lip-lock. I started to apologize for interrupting their moment when I realized who I had run into.

  “Liam?” I stared at him dumbfounded as he pushed frantically away from Kelly.

  “Melissa, it’s not how it looks,” he said, coming toward me.

  I backed away. “It never is, is it?” I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. All I knew was that I had to get out of there. “Don’t follow me.”

  I left the bar, and hopped in my car. I knew it wasn’t safe to drive yet based on my alcohol consumption, so I only drove across the street to Walmart and sat in the parking lot. I tried to fight the tears, but it didn’t work. Sobs wracked my body as the hurt set in. How could I have been so blind? Had they been seeing each other behind my back this whole time?

  I wanted to hit something or kick something, but I didn’t. I just sat in my car and cried until I was sure the alcohol had worn off. When I got back to my room, Kelly wasn’t there. I figured maybe she was staying in his room now that they didn’t have anything to hide. And that brought on another round of sobbing. I cried myself to sleep, and when I woke up, I could barely talk. Great. Way to go out with a bang.

  Liam came to the door several times in the morning, but I refused to answer. And during the show, he tried to get the girls to talk me into leaving the dressing room to go and talk to him. I refused that as well, of course. Kelly attempted to approach me, but I did my best at scaring her off with my evilest of eyes. Kissing him at the end of the show was perhaps the hardest thing I had ever had to do in my life. I could tell he tried to let it linger, but I didn’t allow it. I couldn’t, or else I’d end up a blubbering mess on stage in front of everyone.

  I didn’t hang out after the show. I knew there would be a closing-day cast party, but I didn’t want to be a part of it. I said goodbye to my friends, threw my stuff in the car, and headed back to New York without ever once looking back.

  *

  A week later, I was completely over Liam. Okay, not really, but that’s what I kept telling myself. I figured if I said it enough, it might eventually be true. Either way, it still hurt like the dickens. I hadn’t slept since I got back to the city, and it had nothing to do with noisy neighbors or sirens outside the window. It had everything to do with Liam. Whenever I closed my eyes, all I could see was him with Kelly, kissing her in that dingy hallway.

  I still couldn’t quite believe how it had all played out. I felt like I was in an episode of Sex and the City. Jaded girl finally falls in love, only to discover her boyfriend has been messing around with her best friend the whole time. Not that Kelly and I were anywhere close to being best friends, but still … I thought she was my friend.

  I turned my attention back to the task at hand. The fall audition season was in full swing now that it was September, and I scanned the listings on Backstage.com, jotting down all the ones I wanted to attend in my day planner as I went. I was just finishing up when the phone rang.

  “Hey, Melis! It’s Samantha.”

  “Hey, Sam!” She was one of my cast mates from Annie Get Your Gun. “How’s it going?”

  “Great,” she said. “A few of us are getting together in the city tonight and wanted to know if you could join us.”

  A reunion already? “Um, maybe,” I said with a shrug, even though she couldn’t see me.

  “If you’re worried, you don’t have to be. Neither Liam nor Kelly will be there.”

  I gave a little laugh. “Word traveled fast, I see.”

  “Well, we were all there, Melis. We saw it go down.” There was a pause, and then, “Are you okay?”

  I sighed. “Yeah. At least, I will be. Time heals all wounds, right?”

  “Sure,” Samantha replied. “So, are you in?”

  “Why not?” I took down the name and address of the place, a little Italian restaurant in the West Village, and then hung up the phone. I willed myself not to cry, but it didn’t work.

  By the time I had to start getting ready for the cast outing, my eyes were a red, puffy mess. I did my best to cover them up, but I was pretty sure I still looked like I’d spent the afternoon crying. I wouldn’t let it keep me home, though. It would be good to get out and be social. Maybe I would even meet a guy. If Liam could move on so quickly, why couldn’t I?

  Forty-five minutes later, I stepped off the train. It took me a minute to orient myself with my surroundings, and then I headed in the direction my map app on my phone had indicated I should go. After a few blocks, I could see the red awning and bright neon sign of the restaurant. I slowed down a bit, wondering if I was really up for a dinner with my former cast mates. It could be fun, as long as they stayed away from the topic of Liam … or Kelly … or the combination of the two.

  I trudged on through the people that crowded the small sidewalk until I stood before the restaurant. There were tables set up outside, since it was still fairly warm out. But no one was there. Apparently, the group had opted for the indoors.

  The restaurant was dim with only candles lighting the small dining room. There were no big parties there, so I assumed I was the first one to arrive. Until I saw him. Liam stood beside a table for two in a tuxedo, a large bouquet of red roses in his hands. My jaw dropped, and I stood there, completely speechless, wondering if this was some kind of cruel trick. Shouldn’t those roses have been for Kelly?

  “What are you doing here?” I asked, my mind and heart still reeling.

  “Hoping for a chance to explain,” Liam replied, and I nearly melted at hearing his voice again. I had missed him so much. “Please,” he added for good measure.

  What could it hurt? I had traveled all the way from Harlem, I might as well hear what he had to say. I sat down in the chair he held out for me and then he took his place opposite. He grabbed my hand, and I could feel him lookin
g at me, but I just couldn’t meet his eyes.

  “I know you’re angry, and you have every right to be,” he started. “But only because of what you saw, not because of what really happened.”

  I looked up, confused. “What do you mean?”

  “It was Kelly,” he continued. “She cornered me, I swear. She was drunk and practically threw herself at me. I never kissed her back. As a matter of fact, I was trying to push her off of me when you walked up.”

  I stared at him, wondering if I could trust him. I thought I had known him, but then that had happened and … I was so confused. “How do I know you’re telling the truth?”

  He shook his head. “You don’t. Sadly, there’s no way for me to prove that’s what happened, and I hate that more than anything. But I can tell you this: I love you, Melissa. I think I fell in love with you that first day when we ran lines on the beach. And every day, I fell more and more in love with you. You are the most beautiful, most talented, most incredible woman I’ve ever met, and I will do anything and everything in my power to prove my love to you and show you that you’re the only woman I want to be with.”

  Much to my surprise, I could feel the tears welling in my eyes. I really thought I had dried them all up that afternoon. Nonetheless, I started blubbering like a baby right there in the middle of the restaurant.

  Liam dipped his head down so he could see my eyes. “Does this mean you’ll take me back?” he asked.

  I nodded, unable to speak, and he pulled me by the hand so I was sitting next to him in the booth. He held me and stroked my hair while I cried.

  “I’m sorry,” I said when I finally could speak again. “I’m just so happy.”

  We both laughed at that, and then Liam turned serious again. “I mean it, Melissa. I love you.”

  “I love you, too,” I returned.

  *

  As I twisted my hair into pin curls on top of my head, a light knock drew my attention away from the mirror. Liam stood at my dressing room door, a big bouquet of flowers in his hand. “I am so proud of you, honey.”

  “Hey, who let you up here?” I jokingly replied. “I thought I had security now that I’m a big Broadway star.”