Imperfect Chaos

by York, Marie

  The GPS directed me to a brick building that luckily was the nicest looking thing on this block. I pulled into the parking lot and made my way to 5B.

  The hall smelled like curry and mildew, a vile combination. I came up to her door, and laughed at the welcome mat beneath it with flowers and butterflies. It was the brightest thing in this dingy hallway.

  I banged on the door, expecting I’d have to do a lot of coaxing to get her to actually open it, but within seconds, it flew open.

  A big guy with a crew cut and dog tags hanging around his neck stood there. “Can I help you?” he asked.

  I looked down the hall then back at the number on the door. This was it. 5B. “I’m looking for Brooklyn. She home?”

  “Who the fuck are you?” the guy growled. Like that would fucking intimidate me. He crossed his arms over his chest, staring me down. I didn’t care how big his fucking arms were. I could take him down with one hit.

  “Who the fuck are you?” I demanded back.

  “Her husband,” he barked.

  His words hit me harder than any hit I’d ever taken. I stumbled back like I just took a direct blow to the chest.

  Shock exploded inside me and I needed to get out of there before I put my hand through something. Without another word, I took off, swearing to all that was holy that I would never look at a girl as more than a body and a hole ever again.

  Chapter 14

  Brooklyn

  The door slammed shut with enough force to knock the picture of me and my family off the wall, and the knot in my stomach tightened in fear. I couldn’t hide. He’d find me. He always did and when he did… it was always worse. So, I slipped back into the kitchen, and continued washing the dishes, pretending like I didn’t hear Nix on the other side of that door. Like I didn’t want to run to him and have him save me from the biggest mistake of my past. Nix didn’t need to be involved. It was my burden to bear, not his.

  “Brooklyn!” Karl bellowed, sending dreaded goosebumps down my spine. I knew he was pissed because he called me by my name, instead of the ridiculous nickname he usually had for me.

  I continued washing the dishes, praying that he’d be too tired from his trip, and would let it go. Who was I kidding? Karl never let anything go. I knew what was coming, but denial had become my defense mechanism of choice, so I continued to pray for the best as I heard his footsteps coming closer. His hand slapped down on my arm, the familiar sting rendering me breathless for a moment as his fingers dug deep into my skin. He whipped me around, causing the plate in my hand to slip out, and shatter on the floor.

  “Look what you did, bitch. Clean it up!” He shoved me down to the floor, my knees slamming into the hard tile of the kitchen, bits of the shattered mess, embedding themselves into my kneecaps.

  I bit back the cry that was pushing its way up my throat and picked up the broken pieces of ceramic. I tried desperately to keep my hands from shaking. The last thing I wanted was for Karl to see my fear. The sick bastard fed on it. He found pleasure in intimidating me. I learned a long time ago that the minute he’d see an ounce of fear in me, he’d cling to it, and continuously torture me until I was cowering in a corner.

  That girl, the one he could manipulate, I thought I left her back home. Hundreds of miles away from here with him. I never thought he’d find me. Foolishly, I’d begun to feel safe, comfortable here. I should’ve known.

  The words he always threatened echoed in my mind. The only way you’ll get away from me is over my dead body.

  I thought about killing him in his sleep, poisoning his dinner, but no matter how badly I wanted it, I could never bring myself to do it. I didn’t have it in me to take a life. So, while he was deployed, I got a job he didn’t know about, and saved everything, until I had enough money to leave. I got in my car, made sure I covered all my tracks, and never looked back.

  I thought I was free. I should’ve known better. He was a cruel possessive bastard with contacts in the upper crust of the military, thanks to daddy. Of course he found me. How could I have been so stupid to think I could just run away?

  I had to. In my mind, I had no other choice. I was at my breaking point and just couldn’t bear the thought of another beating. Another rape. He, of course, didn’t think he was hurting me or raping me. Karl thought he was entitled to do with me as he pleased, all because of a piece of paper showing we were married. To him, that meant nothing more than ownership, possession. I had been just so tired of it. I contemplated suicide, but decided I would not give the bastard that much power over my life. He had already taken enough from me, so I took the first opportunity I could find to try and change things for myself.

  Look where it got me. Like the pathetic girl I was, I crawled to the garbage, and disposed of the mess. Maybe if I wasn’t at eye level, he wouldn’t hurt me. I had learned a few tricks over the years to help minimize his tirades. Things like not making eye contact with him and keeping my mouth shut as he raged. My submission and acceptance of what was to come always seemed to lessen his anger. So, I closed my eyes, didn’t utter a peep, and once again prayed for the best. My wishful thinking quickly dissolved as he grabbed me by my hair, and yanked me up from the floor. I took in a deep breath as the pain emanated through my head, and I willed myself not to cry.

  His green eyes that I once thought were the most beautiful things in the world, turned dark, displaying his true colors that I had grown all too familiar with. I could see the rage and disgust building with each passing breath, just waiting to release itself on me.

  “Who the fuck was that?” he demanded, flinging his arm toward the front door.

  “I…I don’t know,” I stuttered. I forced myself to look him in the eyes as I desperately fought to maintain my composure. I needed him to believe me, and looking down or averting his gaze was one sure way to let him know I was lying.

  His hand tightened on my arm, his nails cutting into my flesh. He pulled me close to him. “Don’t you lie to me.” Spit flying from his mouth. I shrieked and tried to cover my face, but it only fueled his anger. His harsh hold became deadly, bruising my skin, and his nostrils flared. “You know what happens when you lie. Don’t tell me you forgot?”

  “No,” I squeaked. “I didn’t.”

  “You didn’t lie, or you didn’t forget?”

  I didn’t forget, and because of that, I needed to really think about my response. If I admitted I lied, he’d have me over his knee, and the type of punishment he’d deliver was nothing like those erotic books and movies portrayed. There would be no pleasure to follow. Only pain and raw swollen skin. I needed him to believe that I only knew Nix casually, and he meant nothing to me.

  “He’s a customer at my job. Probably just wondering why I haven’t shown up in a few days.” I hoped it would be enough to appease him for now.

  Karl’s grip loosened and he ran a finger down my cheek. Suddenly, the terrifying man disappeared, and the sweet, caring boy I fell in love with returned. “I’m here now, kitten. I’ll take care of you. You don’t need to work anymore.” He pulled me tightly against his hard chest, squeezing to the point of pain. “You know I love you, right?”

  I nodded, trying to hold the tears back, as he hugged my head to his chest. His moods changed at the drop of a dime, and if I didn’t go along with it, he’d snap right back to heartless. I was once again caught in this vicious cycle that had become my life.

  The freedom that was in my grasp only hours ago faded away and I was trapped.

  Again.

  Chapter 15

  Nixon

  My fist landed, blow after blow, on the bag. I hadn’t bothered to put gloves on since as soon as I walked in, my mind jumped on a one-way track, and I couldn’t get to the bag fast enough. My knuckles should’ve been screaming, but I couldn’t feel anything through the anger.

  Fucking married! I couldn’t even comprehend it. Was that why she swore me off on day one? Why she panicked every time I got to close? She suddenly became riddled with guilt.


  Whatever. I didn’t fucking care. She was nothing to me now. The only problem was, no matter how many times I hit the bag, no matter how hard I tried to force out the vision of her beneath me, her lips on mine, I couldn’t. Those perfect tits and stupid curls that I just wanted to touch wouldn’t leave my damn mind.

  I landed another punch, causing the bag to sway. I stepped into it, pulled back my arm, and gathered all the anger into my fists. I swung again, but this time I gave it all that I had. The chains rattled, and the bag broke free from its restraint, falling to the floor.

  I kicked the bag and ran my hands through my hair, trying to control the anger devouring me. Usually a few rounds on the bag helped, but tonight it wasn’t fucking working. I needed something else.

  I hit the showers, and even though I was trying to forget Brooklyn, the word husband kept popping into my head. Why didn’t she fucking tell me? Why the hell did she lead me on?

  “Dammit!” I yelled and punched the tile wall. I rested my forehead against the cold porcelain. Blood ran down my fingers, dripping and mixing with the water at my feet. I flexed my hand, wishing I punched Brooklyn’s husband in the face. Smug bastard he seemed to be. At least then I’d have some satisfaction.

  I pulled on the extra pair of clothes I kept in my locker and headed out to the local bar. Smitty’s was a shithole down the block, infested with drunks who should’ve been spending their nights at AA meetings, and whores with no respect for themselves. It was just what I needed to take mind off Brooklyn.

  The scent of cheap beer and even cheaper perfume greeted me as I opened the door and stepped inside. A few drunks sat at the far corner, snacking on bar pretzels, and a group of couples who looked like they belonged on “People of Walmart” were huddled around the only pool table. Two girls wearing skimpy dresses that I’d seen here a million times before swiveled in their stools. The brunette giggled as her bleached blonde friend gave me a wink.

  The blonde had hit on me in the past, but I always blew her off. Tonight, was her lucky night. I decided to finally give her what she’s always wanted, and what I needed at the moment. A quick hard fuck to release some of this pent-up shit, and help me get a certain somebody out of my system once and for all. I had more important things that I needed to focus on like my career and the upcoming fight. This little diversion was just what I needed to put me back on track.

  I didn’t immediately go in for the kill. Didn’t want to seem fucking desperate or pathetic like she looked, so I casually walked to the middle of the bar, pretending like I didn’t even notice her. I was a master at the game of cat and mouse, and she’d be begging for my cock in her pussy in no time.

  The bartender approached, and I ordered a beer. Before I could even glance over my shoulder and make a move, the blonde approached me, pushing her tiny tits in my face as she pretended to reach for the bowl of pretzels.

  “Hungry?” I asked as she purposely leaned closer and smiled. There was a gap in her teeth, wide enough to fit a chicken wing in, but I tried to focus on the things that mattered, and lowered my gaze to her tits. There was a handful there. Just enough, and she had a nice tight ass. Perfect for pounding against.

  “Always,” she purred.

  I turned into her and whispered against her ear. “How hungry are you right now?”

  Her overly glossed lips curved upward. “Famished.”

  I turned on the stool, snaked my arm around her, and pulled her tight against my thigh. She rubbed against me like a goddamned dog in heat. I usually had to put a little more work into a hookup, but this whore seemed ready to spread her legs. So, instead of wasting both of our time, I cut to the chase. “Meet me in the men’s room,” I suggested, and stood from my stool, downing my beer.

  She wrapped her fingers around the bottle before I could pull it from my lips, and she placed it on the bar. “Come on.”

  I narrowed my eyes, staring down at her hand, before I dragged them back up to her face. “Nobody tells me what to do,” I growled. “I make the rules.”

  Her gap teeth slipped over her bottom lip and she bit down. She clearly liked to be dominated. I bet she was already wet. Only one way to tell. It was time to get this show on the road.

  “Let’s go,” I said, and walked toward the bathrooms without even looking behind to see if she was following.

  The back of the bar was dark and dingier than the front. I opened the bathroom door and only then did I turn around. As I expected, she was right up my ass. I rested my hand against the frame, and let her duck under me to enter. She passed, and I slapped her ass, hard, resulting in a deep intake of breath on her part. I grabbed what little there was, and pushed her inside, pulling the door shut with me.

  Her scrawny arms wrapped around my neck, and her lips went right to mine, making me think about the only lips I ever cared to have on mine. Brooklyn’s.

  Dammit. Get out of my fucking head.

  I grabbed the girl’s hair, and plunged my tongue into her mouth without any warning. She tasted like cheap beer, and smelled like cheap perfume, but I pushed those thoughts to the back of my mind. She was a willing body and I needed to fuck. She’d have to do.

  She moaned, her body falling into mine. “I’ve wanted you for so long, Viper.” That’s what they all said, like I was some prize.

  “Stop talking,” I demanded. The last thing I wanted was to have a conversation with her. I tightened my grip on her hair, and pulled her away from my mouth, spinning her around, and bending her over the sink. I wanted to fuck her, not look at her face, or make out with her. I ran my hand up her leg and flipped her dress up over her ass.

  “Mmm, I like it rough,” she cooed.

  “I said, stop talking.” I slapped her ass, leaving a red handprint on her tanned skin. She let out a squeak then a moan. Her hand reached back, latching on to the waistband of my jeans, and she pulled me tight against her. She rubbed my cock through my pants and pressed her head into the crook of my neck, running her tongue along my skin.

  I pushed her head forward. We weren’t here to be all touchy feely. Her fingers crept to my zipper, and I grabbed them, placing her hands on the sink. “Stay,” I ordered before I tugged on my zipper and freed my dick. She reached back and stroked me. For a second, I let her, before I snatched her wrist, and situated it back on the sink.

  “I want to play,” she whimpered, but I ignored her request. This wasn’t the time for fucking games.

  I hooked my finger in the bottom of her thong, and yanked it off to the side. I ran my finger along her pussy, and just as I suspected, she was soaking wet and dying for me. I didn’t make her wait another second. I rolled a condom on and plunged my cock deep into her with one hard thrust. Her body jerked forward and her knuckles turned white as I relentlessly pounded into her.

  I knotted my hands in her hair and drew her back to me. “You do like it rough, you little slut.”

  She answered with a squeak, and I let my fingers fall free from her hair. Her hand smacked against the mirror, and I watched her face contort. “Rub my clit,” she begged. “I’m so close.”

  “Rub your own fucking clit,” I barked into her ear.

  She moaned and tightened her hold on the sink with one hand while the other reached down. Within seconds, she cried out, begging me to fuck her harder, and I was more than happy to oblige.

  I continued to plunge in and out of her, but I was getting bored, and so was my dick. The thrill and the rise in power I always felt when banging some random chick was gone, blocked by one fucking word: husband.

  Anger coursed through my veins, so I latched my hands on the girl’s shoulder, and used her as leverage as I fucked her into oblivion. I glanced up into the mirror, and watched as her eyes rolled into the back of her head. At least someone was enjoying this.

  I closed my eyes, thought about Brooklyn, and all the things I wanted to do to her before I found out she was fucking married. Finally, my balls tightened as the pressure began to build. My hand tightened on the girl’s hip as
I imagined Brooklyn’s curvy ass, bare and waiting for me to take her from behind.

  The pressure exploded, and I came with a vengeance. The girl fell against the sink gasping for air, and I pulled out. I didn’t feel better though, if anything I felt worse. I felt like a piece of shit.

  The girl laughed. “Viper, you do not disappoint.”

  I fixed my pants, tossed the condom into the garbage, and forced a smile. She wrapped her arms around my neck and kissed me. I jerked away and held my hand up. “Um…”

  “Sarah,” she said as she blushed. A little late for that.

  “Sarah, that was fun, but I have somewhere to be.”

  “Of course you do.” She reached into her bra, and retrieved a piece of paper, handing it to me.

  “What’s this?” I asked, staring down, not bothering to unfold it.

  “My number. Call me.”

  I glanced back at the paper and laughed. Did she keep it in there for moments like this? I held it up to her. “I’m just going to throw it in the garbage when I leave here, so keep it, and give it to the next guy.”

  Her eyes widened, and I had a feeling if I didn’t get out of there soon, she’d slap me. So, I flung open the door and headed out. I stopped at the door and looked back at her. “Thanks for the fuck,” I said with a wink.

  “Anytime.”

  I closed the door and headed home to Sassy, still full of tension, and out of ways to release it.

  Chapter 16

  Nixon

  Johnnie Walker was my best friend last night, but this morning he was an absolute shithead. I stumbled out of my bedroom in search of water and aspirin. I came upon the half empty bottle first and tossed the whole thing in the trash. Didn’t know why I was holding onto it anyway, since it was a gift from Beckham the last time he was here. Too bad I didn’t bring it with me on my trip to see him. I could’ve used it to throw at his double-crossing sister-fucking head.