Secrets

by Shannon Pemrick

  “Everyone spread out, and help whoever you can,” Laz ordered. “Once we get the odds evened out, we can regroup and push forward. Understood?”

  “Yes,” we all replied.

  “Good, now move.”

  We acted quickly. It was hard not to when Laz was leading. Calm and confident, she thought with a level head and thought of us over the mission even if it meant losing.

  Argus and Blaze veered right, into an alley, and Laz kept running straight, with Raid and Raikidan, not surprisingly, following her. Raikidan still interested me. I couldn’t tell if he was just taking this battle partner thing very seriously, or if he willingly followed Laz blindly into any situation like a lovestruck puppy.

  Rylan tugged my arm to follow him down a side street, heading to the left side of the battle. I complied and followed. If Raikidan was a lovestruck puppy, I could totally relate. It was hard not to try to please someone when you cared enough.

  Rylan and I ran through side street after side street, avoiding direct contact with the military and helping those we could. It just didn’t feel like we were helping much. It felt like for every one person we helped, five more needed it.

  “We’re losing the right flank!” someone called in through the communicators.

  “Left flank isn’t looking that great either,” someone on our end called in. “How is the center holding up?”

  “Peachy,” Laz muttered.

  I refrained from laughing. This was too serious to turn into a joke. Rylan pulled me into an alley, and when we came out on the other side, I froze. No, can’t be… Laz and Raikidan fought the military in front of us. We had been pushed into the center.

  “They’re corralling us!” Rylan yelled into the communicator. “We need to push forward if we have any chance of winning.”

  “It’s too late,” someone rang in. “We’re out-manned and out-gunned. There’s no way we can push forward unless we want heavy losses.”

  “We can’t afford any heavy losses,” Laz said. “Our numbers are too few as it is.”

  “We need to fall back.” The sound of Xantar’s voice surprised me, though I knew it shouldn’t have. There were so many of us fighting, it was only natural for more from our team to have been pulled to handle this.

  “I agree.” Laz didn’t sound happy, but who would? “Fall back.”

  No one argued with her. There was no point when the truth was right there in front of us. We’d lost, again.

  We began retreating, but I stopped running when I realized not everyone was moving. Laz and Rylan weren’t with us. I turned to see them facing the military as if Laz had never called for the retreat to begin with.

  “Laz, Rylan, what do you think you’re doing?” I yelled.

  This caught the attention of others, and they stopped to figure out what was going on, even though the military hadn’t ceased their fire.

  “Everyone keep going,” she ordered. “Rylan and I will hold them off as long as we can.”

  “But you can’t!” Raid argued.

  “They’ll kill you!” I screamed.

  “They’ll follow us if we leave with you now, and that will put more people in danger.” Laz wasn’t going to budge on this, and I couldn’t believe they were going to do this. How could they do this to us?

  “We won’t die,” Rylan promised. “We’re just going to distract them long enough for you guys to get out of the radar and disappear into the shadows.”

  “Promise?”

  I thought I heard him grin. “Promise.”

  I wanted to argue some more, but Raikidan tugged my arm. How could he go along with this? But when I looked him in the eye, I could see this wasn’t something he was doing too willingly.

  “We have to trust them,” he whispered. “If they believe this to be the only way, then we have to believe it too.”

  I nodded and ran as fast as I could away from the approaching military. I looked back to see Rylan shifting to his wolf-dog form, and that scared me. He wasn’t putting up a fuss like he usually did, and he looked much more serious than I was used to seeing.

  “Please don’t die…”

  I bit my lip and resisted the urge to start crying. Seda told us they were still alive, but it had been two hours since we had gotten back to the house. I was on the verge of a panic attack.

  Some of our teammates and others from other teams had come with us to wait, and even Azriel had come over, just in case. Danika held a cooling cup of tea but she had yet to touch it. I had a feeling she was using it to keep her from freaking out and I wished I had something like that myself. It didn’t help that Raikidan’s and Raid’s rising anxiety levels slammed into me every passing minute. Raid, I could understand, being Rylan’s bother. Since close family was hard to get when you are a created soldier, it’s hard to accept you might have lost one.

  But Raikidan I couldn’t fully justify. He was naturally protective of all the women in the house but Laz held a greater weight with him, and I couldn’t figure out why. Neither would admit there was something between the two, but here he was, about ready to have a heart attack from worry.

  My ears twitched. Did I hear something in the basement? For a second, I thought I was hearing things, but then I heard it again and this time, Raid and Raikidan noticed as well. The sound came again and it sounded weird. It sounded like a sloshing, smearing sound, or even… my brow furrowed. Or even a dragging sound. The dragging and smearing became louder and thumping was added into it, catching everyone else’s attention.

  I jumped when something collided with the door. Everyone was on edge. Some even readied a gun to ease themselves. The door of the basement jiggled and flew open. I gasped as two bodies crashed to the floor.

  “By the gods!” Danika shrieked. “Azriel, help me with them.”

  The two of them weren’t the only ones to run over to Laz and Rylan as they lay in a crumpled, bleeding heap. I helped Azriel roll Rylan off of Laz, and I begin to shake as I got a good look at their injuries. How had they made it back in this condition?

  Raikidan cradled Laz in his arms and looked absolutely horrified. Tears welled up in my eyes and I tried to hold them back. They promised they wouldn’t die. My eyes widened when Laz coughed and then stirred.

  “Laz, dear?” Danika held Laz’s hand. “Laz?”

  “El–Elarinya… fix… fix Rylan first. P–please.”

  Danika’s brow furrowed. “W–what?”

  “P–please…” Laz’s eyes shut and her body relaxed.

  I gulped and fought back tears. “L–Laz?”

  “C’mon.” Azriel hauled Rylan onto his back. “We need to get them downstairs now, or we’re going to lose them both.”

  Danika nodded and stood up. Raikidan cradled Laz better and stood up. I went to follow them as they headed for the hidden infirmary, but Danika stopped me. “You need to stay up here.”

  I shook my head. “No, I’m going with you.”

  “You are to stay.”

  She was firm, but I was stubborn. I wasn’t just going to sit up here and wait for some sort of bad news. I was going to help. “I’m going down with you to help.”

  “Someone make sure she doesn’t leave this room,” Danika ordered.

  Argus grabbed onto my arm and attempted to coax me to sit back, but I ripped my arm out of his grip and tried to follow Danika. Argus grabbed a hold of me and attempted to pull me back, but he wasn’t as strong as me. Blaze and Zane tried to give him a hand, slowing me down quite a bit, but it still wasn’t enough.

  “No, I’m going to help!” I argued.

  “You’re just going to be in their way,” Blaze insisted. “You need to stay up here so they can get Eira and Rylan fixed up without any issues.”

  “No!” Their grips began to fail as I fought them. “I’m not going to
sit and do nothing while my friends are dying.”

  “I told you to hold her back!” Danika yelled.

  “You try holding back a train,” Blaze muttered.

  “Seda?”

  “You need to get downstairs,” Seda said through gritted teeth. “I can’t hold back the bleeding forever and between the two of them, that is taking all of my concentration.”

  “Oh for the love of Le’carro!” Danika stormed over to me and pressed two fingers against my forehead. “Everything is going to be fine, Ryoko. Now rest.”

  I tried to struggle, but the moment Danika’s eyes began to glow, a wave of peace rushed through me. It felt like nothing was wrong in the world—like I could sleep forever. Then, darkness overtook me.

  Chapter 37

  (Eira)

  Gunfire was heavy in my ears. The ground exploded all around me, but there was no fear in my body—only the lust for blood. The ground exploded in front of me, and blood flew everywhere.

  It smeared all over the walls and dripped in pools as I dragged myself along the wall. My vision was weak, but I kept moving. Something that resembled a door blocked my way until I found the part that moved it. My body gave out and I hit the ground. Blood filled my view, and then darkness took over that…

  My eyes fluttered open, only to be blinded by a bright light and overwhelmed by the heavy smell of medicine. I didn’t like, it so I closed my eyes in hopes it would disappear.

  My eyes didn’t open again until a familiar, light chuckle hit my ears. “About time you came back to us. You’ve been out for a few days.”

  I smiled. “Good to see you too, Az.”

  “I was afraid you were actually lost to us. It took us a while to get you stable, and even then, that was a tentative status.” I grunted, which sent searing pain through my body. “Hey, take it easy. You’re better, but not back to normal.”

  “How’s Rylan? Is he okay?”

  Azriel nodded. “Thanks to you, yes. If you hadn’t carried him back here and told your friend to tend to him first in your weakened state, I don’t think he would have made it. I had no idea you knew real healers.”

  “You’re a real healer.”

  “Medic, not healer,” he corrected.

  “Same thing,” I argued.

  “I use modern medicine, not natural healing abilities and herbal remedies. That makes it different.”

  “Whatever.”

  Azriel knelt down next to me. “How are you feeling? You looked like you were on your way to another plane by the time I was able to get you in here and tend to you while your friend helped Rylan.”

  “To be honest, I’m feeling really numb. I only feel pain when I make sharp movements.”

  Azriel nodded. “I figured as much. Between my medicine and your friend’s healing, it was assumed that would happen.”

  “How bad is it, Az?”

  Azriel looked away. “I don’t think you want to know.”

  “I need to know.”

  He sighed. “I thought Ryoko was distraught after seeing you when you stumbled through that door, but when she came in here to see you after we had you stable, she broke down. Raikidan took one look at you and left. He was barely able to stay calm enough to bring you down here. You still have all your limbs, so that’s a plus.”

  “I’d like to see for myself.”

  Azriel sighed again and stood up. “Very well.”

  He walked over to a table and came back with a small mirror in hand. He held it up so I could take a look at the damage. My heart stopped at the sight of the face looking back at me. Is that really me? There were so many bruises and scars, and even cuts still trying to heal naturally. An alibi was going to be near impossible to come up with. I looked like I had come from war.

  I took a slow breath. “And the rest of me?”

  “About the same. Some areas are worse, but not many. With our biggest concern being Rylan, we had only been able to get you stable before having to tend to him again. It put your healing process at a standstill and caused scars to form when we finally got around to progressing your healing.”

  “All right. I’ll think of something that’ll throw off any suspicion.”

  “How do you do it, Laz? How do you face such burdens without any hesitation or regret?”

  “If I don’t, who will?”

  “It doesn’t always have to be you who does something. Why can’t you let someone else take that burden?”

  “Tell me, Azriel, who else would take that burden? Who else would protect those who deserve it with no worry about their own life?”

  Azriel sighed. “Only you.”

  “And that is how I do it. Someone has to take the burden, so I might as well elect myself instead of waiting for it to be thrust upon me. I don’t have as much to lose as others, anyway.”

  He knelt down beside me again. “I wish you wouldn’t say things like that.”

  “The truth hurts sometimes.” I leaned my head into his touch as he rested his hand on my head. “It hurts…”

  Azriel wrapped himself around me in a tight hug, but I didn’t fight it. Instead, I pulled a bandaged hand over his back and returned the gesture. Azriel didn’t come into my life too long after Ryoko and the others did. He came in at a time I was the most suspicious of other’s intentions, but somehow he wormed his way in, and the two of us had been capable of forming a certain type of bond that made him feel like a brother, but also like a father. A bond similar to the one I made with Shva’sika, and the one Valene had formed with me.

  Azriel pulled away. “I’ll leave you to rest. Will you be up for visitors?”

  “Sure.”

  “All right. I’ll let the others know you’re up for a few. Rest, and I’ll come and check on you in a little bit.” He opened the door of my temporary room and then looked at me. “And, Laz, please don’t do something so reckless again. I don’t want another heart attack.”

  I chuckled. “I’ll do my best, but can’t promise anything.”

  Azriel nodded and left, leaving me alone to think, which was rarely ever good. I lifted a bandaged hand and unwrapped it, even though I knew it wasn’t the best idea. My hand looked as bad as I thought. Large scars crossed everywhere, and scabs covered areas the scars had yet to touch.

  As I looked at my hand, the memories of what happened came back. The bloodlust—my built-up walls crumbling with ease—the pain of the change—my hunger to kill as I tore soldiers apart one by one. It had been so easy for me to revert back to that… monster. I hadn’t really wanted to do it that way, but it had been the best distraction—and also the most destructive.

  I clenched my hand as I spoke aloud in my room, alone. “I’m sorry, Rylan. I should have thought of a plan that only involved me getting hurt.”

  “You should have thought of a way where you hadn’t gotten hurt at all.”

  Surprised by the voice, I tried to sit up, only to regret it a little when pain shot through me. “R–Raikidan. How long have you been there?”

  “Not long.” He came into the room more. “How are you feeling?”

  “All right, I guess. I’m awake and have some energy. Definitely in better shape than I could have been.”

  Raikidan knelt down beside me. “Well you look better.”

  I grunted and flinched a little. Numbness is wearing off now… great. Raikidan reached over and caressed my cheek. I flinched from pain.

  Raikidan pulled away immediately. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

  I shook my head. “Don’t worry about it. The treatments Shva’sika and Azriel used on me caused my body to go numb. It’s starting to wear off now. I don’t think I’ll be doing much for some time.”

  “Is it a surface pain or is there internal pain too?”

  “Surfac
e mostly. I doubt I’d be doing as well as I am if I was still having internal problems. Besides, Shva’sika would have made sure I didn’t have any internal problems.”

  Raikidan stood up. “Get up.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “You heard me. Get up.”

  “I just told you I’m in pain and don’t have a lot of energy, and you’re trying to tell me to stand up?”

  “Yes. You need to stand up—and don’t bring the blanket with you.”

  “Like hell! I have no clothes on, from what I can tell, and you expect me to just stand in front of you? I don’t think so.”

  Raikidan closed his eyes and his hands clenched into fists. “Eira, don’t argue with me. Just do it, or I’ll pull you out of that bed myself.”

  I propped myself up better. “You even try and I’ll have my hands around your throat!”

  Raikidan’s eyes flew open. “Just do it, Eira!”

  I flinched. The harsh tone and the intensity of his stare made me extremely uncomfortable.

  Raikidan sighed and his gazed softened. “I’m sorry, Eira. Please just do this for me. You don’t have to face me. I just really need you to do this. Please trust me.”

  I held eye contact with him for several moments, wary of listening since he wasn’t telling me what he planned to do. But determination won out. Slowly, I pushed myself up, which was a taxing effort, without a doubt. I made sure as I moved that the blanket came me, careful not to allow it show too much of me, as I discovered I really didn’t have anything on but the blanket and a few scattered bandage wraps.

  I lost my balance as I stood up, but Raikidan caught me. As he held me gently, my face burned with embarrassment over the thought of how well his hands fit perfectly on my upper and lower back. I forced myself away from him and fought for control over my wobbly legs. I sighed once I finally had that all under control, and glanced at Raikidan warily. Raikidan returned my gaze with a calm, patient one. I managed to turn around, but letting go of the blanket was a little harder. After more internal struggle, the blanket fell to the bed, exposing the rest of me.