by JJ Ross
“You feel amazing, Sonny,” he moaned into my ear as he moved slowly, delicately.
“Andrew,” I managed to gasp through my breath catching in my throat. I pulled tighter on his back urging him closer.
I was laying my head on the pillow with him holding me, kissing my neck.
“That was perfect,” I whispered.
“It was.” He agreed as he stroked my back. He looked at his phone and then bent in to kiss me passionately
“Happy New Year, Sonny,” he whispered as he pulled away and lay on his side, looking at me.
“Happy New year,” I replied. His eyes began to droop as he stared into mine. I smiled and moved closer to him as he wrapped his arms around me for warmth.
I woke up to the sun shining in my eyes and a winter chill that was almost unbearable. I tried to snuggle back underneath the pile of blankets. Suddenly, I jerked up in a panic. I was not in my bed, I quickly realized, shaking away all morning grogginess.
“Drew, ” I said loudly, shaking him, “Wake up! Drew, wake up.”
He stirred slightly and then opened his eyes. He looked around the room and then at me. We shouldn’t have slept there all night. I should have gone home after, but we fell asleep.
“Crap!” he said as he scrambled to get his clothes on. I hurriedly put mine on and then helped him to gather the evidence of our evening. We hurried down to his truck, where I put the blankets and heater in the cab.
I stood next to his truck watching him, taking a breath. He was leaning against the truck with his phone in his hand. He quickly dialed a number and then smiled and winked at me.
He had a quick conversation with someone. I could tell it was his mother. No he wasn’t drunk. He had fallen asleep at a friend’s house. Blah, blah, blah. He told her he would be home soon. I covered my mouth to stifle my giggle as he hung up the phone.
“What’s funny?” he asked as he approached me and pulled me close by the waist.
“Nothing. Nothing at all,” I smirked as he kissed me.
“I need to get going.”
“I know. Will you, umm, are you going straight home?”
He grinned, “No, I will make a stop at the store and let you get a head start. We can’t be that obvious, now can we?” he said as he lightly kissed my forehead.
“Fine. I have to deal with my parents anyways.”
“Sonny,” he held me firmly by the shoulders, “You can’t tell your dad you know. Not yet.”
I rolled my eyes, “Of course I can. This needs to be addressed. He had no right keeping you from me. After what I had to go through and the torture I endured without you, I mean, no way. I am talking to him.”
He cringed, “Please Sonny, for me. Don’t talk to him yet.”
“Yet? Drew, we did nothing wrong. So what if we made out a few times, but we never did anything wrong,” I insisted.
“We will tell them, when the time is right. Both of us, together.”
“Of course. Together.”
I liked the sound of that. It made us a team.
We walked over to my car and he opened the door for me. Before I could slip into my car, he grabbed me and leaned me against the door frame. He looked at me as if to say something, but then dropped his hold and quickly hugged me.
“What, Drew? What is it?”
“Nothing. Everything is perfect.” He whispered into my hair as he held me close.
I looked at his face. “Are you sure? Is there anything else you wanted to tell me?”
He hesitated for a moment, “No, I mean, I just, I really care about you. I was sure you and my brother were going to get back together and all chances of us would be lost, but here we are. I’m just so glad you decided to come out last night,” he smiled.
“Drew, listen, no matter what happens, no matter who comes into my life, it doesn’t matter at all. You have a piece of my heart that I will never get back or be able to replace with anyone or anything.”
“I feel the same way Sonny.” He kissed my cheek and then I got into my car and drove away from my secret place and my secret lover. I mean, he was not officially my lover, but I had finally reached a milestone. I wasn’t a virgin anymore.
I pulled into the driveway only to find Chance sitting on the top step of the front porch. He looked upset, or maybe I was misreading that for hung-over. I slowly walked up to the front porch and stopped in front of him. I sat next to him and waited for him to say something. Instead, I was answered with an awkward silence. I let it build for a few minutes as I looked out onto the front lawn, but finally gave in.
“Hey, what’s up?” I asked sounding as casual as possible.
He looked up at me, his eyes looked red as if he had been crying, “Where were you?”
“What?”
He stood up and grabbed my arm, pulling me to my feet.
“Owe, Chance, that hurts,” I yelped grabbing his hand in an attempt to loosen his grip. He tightened his hold as I saw fresh tears pool in his eyes.
“I asked you, where were you?” He was mad. I could read it all over his face. Mad and hurt all in one. Did he know? Is this how he would find out about Drew?
“I was, out.”
He grabbed both my shoulders, bringing tears to my eyes, “Where?!”
“Chance, you are hurting me. Please stop!” I pleaded. He quickly dropped his hands.
“You were with him, weren’t you?” he asked quietly as he looked away, waving toward his house.
“Who, Chance? What are you talking about?”
“Stop playing dumb. You were with Drew weren’t you!”
“What?? I…. Chance, listen to me, please, just listen and let me explain.”
He was in my face shouting, “Stop avoiding my question! Just tell me the truth. You have been lying for over a year now, both of you.”
“Chance, please calm down,” I tried to reach out to him, but he slapped my hand down. I rubbed it looking at him with tears in my eyes.
“Tell me the truth! I want to know, NOW!!” he was back in my face yelling.
“That’s enough Chance.” It was Drew. He stepped between the two of us and was looking at Chance, daring him to make a move. In my confusion, I hadn’t even heard his truck pull up or heard him rush across the front lawn to stop what was happening.
“Ohhh, well look who comes to save the day! Where were you when she tried to kill herself? HUH!? Where were you then?! That’s right, NO WHERE! You were ready to let her DIE!” He said as he pushed Drew to the side.
Drew quickly came back to his defensive position in front of me. He opened his mouth as if to say something, but he was cut off by Chance.
“How long, ANDREW!?”
“How long what, Chance?”
“How long have you been messing with my girl?”
“I am not your girl. Not anymore” I quickly added over Drew’s shoulder. I saw hurt flood his face again.
“So, what have we been doing for the last couple of months? Why have I been trying to get back into your heart? Sonny, we are meant to be together. Look at everything we have gone through. It was hard, but look at us now.”
“Chance, listen, please…” Drew tried to calm him again.
“Shut up Andrew!”
“Look it’s a very difficult situation. Please calm down, ” Drew continued.
“I hate you Drew! You know what she means to me! I asked you out right, you bold faced liar!! I asked if you cared about her. I asked if you were interested in her. I asked you everything, because I was sure I saw something and you assured me no. You said NO!” Chance screamed at him.
“I know you care about her, but…” Drew started.
“It figures, you probably slept with her, too! Is that where you were? With her, last night? You managed to lure her out so she could just be another one of your conquests? Is that it? It wasn’t enough that she wanted to die for you?! You worthless piece of…”Chance started.
“Chance!” I yelled to cut him off. He knew a lot more than
I thought he did.
“How long have you two been seeing each other?” Chance demanded. It was time to be honest.
“We stopped after graduation, and last night we did meet up.” I explained. “Look, Chance, I care about you, but, I’m sorry. I don’t know how this happened, or how I let it get this far, and I am so sorry Chance. I don’t feel for you, what you feel for me. I never meant to lead you on.”
“Sonny, you just need some more time. Maybe we can just try again. Forget about Drew. You and I, we have something really special. We’ve been friends our whole lives, surely that’s enough to evolve into more,” he tried to reach for me as I stepped back into Drew.
“Chance, it’s over. This is not going to work.”
“Sonny, maybe we could just try to…”
“No. It’s not fair to you. I don’t…I just, I don’t care about you the way I care about him,” I explained.
“I want to be with you.” He pleaded.
“I can’t give you what you want. I can’t give you all of me, not when I care about Drew the way I do. He has my whole heart.”
“I just want to be with you,” he whispered sharply.
“Chance, please don’t make this harder for us… please…”
“I should have known a long time ago. The way you two always look at each other. Then there’s the way you won’t look at each other and then avoid each other, as if you think it would keep people from seeing the truth. I just don’t get it. I can’t see why you two… just, did you ever sleep with him… you know, before… when we were together?”
I stopped in shock, “No. never Chance. It was always just you.”
“Do you love him?” he asked looking into my eyes. I froze. I contemplated trying to lie and knew that I couldn’t.
Slowly I nodded my head.
“Why?” he asked getting madder, “Why him? Why Drew? Why did you have to pick him? My own brother!”
“I don’t know. I just can’t make myself feel something for you what isn’t there and I can’t will away the feelings I have for him.
“Drew, how could you!? You are my flesh and blood!! You know how much I love her!”
He was in Drew’s face again, screaming.
Chapter 17
“WHAT is going on out here??” It was Drew’s mother walking up with my mother, and our fathers. Apparently they had been within ear range, possibly on the back patio.
“DREW!” Chance yelled pointing at him.
“Andrew? What is going on? Why are you two yelling like this?” she asked with concern all over her face.
“Mom, listen, Chance is really upset, but he doesn’t even know…”
“Oh I know all right! Mom, Drew has been sleeping with Sonny!”
“What are you talking about Chance?” his mother asked confused.
“They have been sneaking around with each other for months.”
“Drew, is that true?” his mother asked in shock.
“Yes… Sonny,” my mother turned to me, “is that true?”
“Well, yes and no, but…” I tried to explain.
Everyone froze and turned to us. Drew quickly grabbed my hand and held it protectively.
“You son of a b…” my dad came from behind them, but not before Mr. Mitchell could grab him. He looked at Drew’s dad with hurt in his eyes. He quickly turned to Drew as Mr. Mitchell held his arm across my dad’s chest.
“I told you to stay away from her…and I meant that.” He glared at Drew.
“How could you Dad!?” I cried, “Why would you do that?”
“He is too old for you and not right for you. Chance, I could accept, but if you knew what his father and I went through to fix his messes so he could have a future. He’s trouble, Sonny,” He explained, “Now, you see what happened? You two are not going to work! This stops here!”
“Oh Jim!” started Mrs. Mitchell, “Can’t you see they are in love? Maria’s mother thought you would never be right for her, and look, you two have been married for twenty something years.”
“Beth Anne, Maria and I were very different and that was a different time!”
“DAD!?” I interrupted with a questioned look, pleading for an answer, “Why?!”
“Sonny, please go in the house so we can talk to the boys,” my mother started.
I shook my head and held close to Drew, “I won’t leave for you all to attack him.”
“Sonny, please listen to your mother, go inside for now. Chance would you please take her in?” Mrs. Mitchell asked her son.
He reached to me and I jerked away. I stormed up the steps and slammed the door. Standing at the bay window next to the front door I watched as they started to shout again. Chance was yelling at Drew as his mother tried to calm him down.
My dad was yelling at Drew as my mother and Mr. Mitchell tried to calm him down. It was awful. I watched as Drew finally threw up his hands in desperation and began to walk away. He walked toward his truck and then began to back the truck out of the driveway.
I burst through the door and screamed for him, “Drew!! WAIT!” I ran faster toward the road and after his pickup truck. I saw the red brake lights as he stopped for me to catch up. I heard Chance and my parents yelling my name as everyone urged me to come back.
I quickly jumped into the cab of the truck and slammed the door, “GO!” I yelled as I looked back at Chance standing in the middle of the street, helpless.
And he did. He floored the gas and took us away from everything.
**********
We rode quietly for a long time. I reached over and grabbed Drew’s hand as I watched his face. He stared straight ahead. I could tell he was fighting back the tears. He smiled at me slightly as he continued to focus on the road, so I scooted across the bench seat and laid my head on his shoulder.
“What now, Drew?” I asked quietly, in almost a whisper.
“I don’t know, babe,” He looked at me and then quickly back to the road, “I didn’t exactly plan for all this.”
“I know.”
He sat quietly without saying a word. I watched his face as he intently focused on the road. His beautiful features were traced with worry and sadness. I softly stroked his arm and rested my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes.
“You know we have to go back, right?” he asked finally. I lifted my head.
“When…now? Why?” I demanded.
“What did you expect, Sonny? We can’t just run away from everything. They are our family. We have to make this right. Besides, you have your scholarship, and I definitely won’t let you throw that away. Especially not for me.”
“Drew…”
“No Sonny. I mean it,” he slowed the truck and then finally stopped. I looked around us and realized we were at the lake. He turned to me, “You can’t throw away your future for me! Do you want your father to be right? Do want everyone to say I told you so?”
I thought quietly for a moment, “I guess not. I didn’t think of that, all I could think of was being with you.”
He softly stroked my face in affection, “We have to be smart about all of this. Our time will come. I promise.”
I huffed and sank back into the seat looking up at the roof of the truck’s cab. Why did he have to be right all the time?
“Go back,” I managed to mumble as I stared out of the window. I watched as small bombs of water began to fall on the windshield. Even better, now it was raining, I thought gruffly.
“Are you sure? We can take a few more minutes if you want,” he hesitated with his hand on the ignition. I reached over and gently pulled his hand down and held it close to my heart.
“Okay. Not yet,” I kissed the hand I held, “I just want to sit here with you for a little while longer. I just want to enjoy this before we head into the hornets’ nest.” I rested my head on his shoulder and looked out of the window again. The rain was coming down faster and the rhythm of the pitter patter on the roof of his truck made my eyes heavy. He pulled his arm around me and held m
e close as he let the music play, engulfing us in our cozy little space.
“I love you,” he said as he softly kissed my forehead. I looked up into his amazing, golden eyes and beamed.
“I have waited so long for you to say that.”
“I have been trying to tell you for a long time,” he smiled.
He stopped and looked out of the window and pointed, “well, look at that!”
“It’s snowing, Andrew,” I managed to whisper through my tears. He had me wrapped around his little finger. There was nothing that could ever take me from him. I watched as the white wonderland swirled around us and began to settle on the trees and ground all around.
He turned the key in the ignition, bringing the truck to life. I loved the sound of his truck. The way it roared anytime he started it and the way it chugged as it idled. He pulled the gear shift down into reverse and looked at me.
“We need to get going. It looks like it is getting a lot thicker. I can barely see out of the windshield anymore.”
He began to back up slowly and then put the truck in drive. He stopped with his foot on the brake as he looked at me.
“What?” I asked.
“I just really love you so much. God has given me everything I have ever wanted. The timing might be a little off, but it doesn’t even matter. I love you, Sonny.”
“I love you too, Drew,” I smiled as I reached up and kissed him slowly. I pulled back and felt myself glowing, “You are everything to me.” He grinned and turned back to the steering wheel, and turned on the windshield wipers. I looked through the windshield. He was right, the snow was getting very thick. I think I could only see twenty or thirty feet in front of the truck.
Drew took his time on the roads and down the hills, with the steep cliffs on both sides. I looked up at him worriedly and he lightly patted my knee. The snow was coming quicker and thicker still. Then, my phone rang and I quickly answered it.
“Hey mom”
