Voyeur

by Candace Wondrak

  “Do you want to know a secret, Lake?” Crystal whispered, her voice purring out, all seductive and enticing, like velvet on your ears. She took another step towards him, reaching behind her to untie the fabric holding back her tits. “I’ve always thought you were cute.” The fabric was untied, and she held it to her side for a moment, making a big show of dropping it to the floor as her tits hung free.

  I’d seen her body naked plenty of times to know what she looked like standing there before him, and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel a type of smug satisfaction when I watched Lake’s gaze drop to those big, round tits.

  “Uh, that’s nice,” Lake spoke, sounding horribly awkward and again making me question Zoey’s taste. “But what—” He leaned back when Crystal knelt over him, laying a finger on his lips to shush him.

  “The only thing that matters right now is making sure you’re feeling good,” Crystal spoke, and though her back was to me, I bet she gave him a wily smile with those red lips. She dropped her finger from Lake’s mouth, trailing it down his chest.

  Lake’s face turned red as a cherry. Literally. He blushed like I’d never seen another man blush—but, again, that was probably because he was a boy and not a man, like I’d said. “Crystal, it’s good to see you, but I don’t…” He tried to get up, but it was impossible with Crystal bending over him.

  Within a moment, she had her hand between his legs, cupping his manhood, beginning to stroke it as she went to straddle him on the couch, thereby blocking him from getting up and storming out.

  Eh, I doubted he would storm out. He’d trip and stumble more than anything else.

  “Shh,” Crystal cooed, her bare chest in his face as she ground once against him, her hands now on his shoulders. “Just let me take good care of you.” She went to kiss him, and I was expecting that to be that.

  After all, who could look at a beauty like Crystal and shoot her down? Granted, I wanted Zoey, but I knew the ways of men. I knew how people with cocks thought; half the time, that’s what they actually thought with, so it wasn’t difficult to imagine Lake giving in and letting Crystal do whatever it was she wanted to his body, thereby cementing what I knew deep down all along—he was not right for Zoey. Zoey was too good for him.

  But, much to my horror, that’s not what happened.

  Lake set both hands on Crystal’s shoulders, careful to avoid touching her bare tits, and he pushed her back, stunning her so much that he actually pushed her off his lap completely. “No,” he said, jumping to his feet before Crystal could go at him again. “No, this is… this is insane.” He glanced at me, no longer as red in the face as he was before. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

  Crystal’s eyes were wide as she glanced between us, not knowing what to do, obviously. She breathed hard, looking like she wanted to make like a deer in headlights and bolt. When I lifted a hand and flicked to the door, she took the hint, gathering up her top and slipping out as she worked to put it back on.

  I did not stand, but I did give Lake a sneer. “What was that?” My head tilted, and I waited for him to repeat himself.

  “You heard what I said,” Lake spoke, standing his ground before me.

  “I’m afraid I don’t know what you mean.”

  Lake waved his hands through the air, shaking his head softly. “You know what? I must be crazy to think that you’d realize how messed up this whole thing is. I mean, look at you. You clearly do whatever the hell you want when you want, and somehow you want Zoey. That’s what all this is about, isn’t it? You were trying to scare me off, or get me to… do whatever with Crystal, but you know what? Not everyone is like you. There are some good people out there, as hard as it might be for you to realize it.”

  I glared at him, my hands itching to get around his throat. Strangulation wasn’t a favorite of mine, as it was usually too up close and personal for my tastes, but it would get the job done.

  “When I like someone, I don’t sleep with someone else,” Lake added. “And, besides, if you know anything about Zoey, that’s exactly what her ex did to her. I don’t know about you, but her ex is not someone I want to be like.”

  I did not appreciate being talked down to, so even though it was the last thing I wanted to do, I got to my feet, towering over him since he was a good half a foot shorter than me. Whatever else he was going to say, he didn’t, so I opened my mouth to mutter, “She likes you. Until now, I couldn’t see why the fuck that would be.”

  And, even though I really didn’t want it to be, it was true. He might be no more than a boy who was barely a man, but he was not as weak as I thought he was. I stared down into the blue eyes of someone who was devoted to Zoey, even though he wasn’t with her.

  How steadfast would he be if he was with her, officially? Would he do anything for her? Would he die for her?

  Okay, that last one was unquestionably asking too much, but in time, I didn’t doubt it would be true. There was something in Zoey that inspired such feelings inside you; it seemed we were all helpless when it came to that one.

  “You’re loyal, I’ll give you that,” I spoke. The frown I wore right now was mostly to myself; this was not at all how I imagined this going, and now I had to face the fact that this Lake wasn’t going anywhere.

  “Uh… thank you?” Lake sounded unsure, which only caused my scowl to deepen.

  “I will let you remain in her life, for now,” I said, breathing out evenly, knowing I appeared as intimidating as ever. “But know this: if you fuck up even a little, I will have Carter drag you before me, force you to get on your knees, and end your pitiful life.”

  He made a nervous sound, his awkwardness knowing no bounds. “I don’t know how to respond to that.”

  “Don’t,” I advised. “Get out of here instead and think about how you’re going to apologize to Zoey for ghosting her.”

  “I wasn’t—” When he was undoubtedly about to tell me he wasn’t ghosting her, I cocked a brow, which caused him to stop immediately. Lake gave me a quick nod, taking a step away from me, and then he bolted toward the door, leaving, out of my sight not nearly soon enough.

  My feet drew me to the door, and I exited the backroom in time to see Lake hurrying towards the exit of the club. Past the strobe lights, past the half-naked women and the men drooling over them, he left without looking back.

  Carter stood before me, prickling. “That was quick.”

  I adjusted my suit, feeling itchy, for whatever reason. “It did not go how I expected.” I had to leave money with Autumn for Crystal, to thank her for her help, even if her help didn’t really do much, in the end. Still, I owed her the cash, and I always paid my debts.

  “Don’t even tell me.”

  “He’s loyal to Zoey,” I muttered.

  Carter glared at me. “I said don’t tell me, boss.” His voice I could barely hear over the pounding music, but his expression said enough. He was as thrilled as I was to let Zoey continue her dalliance with Lake, but seeing as how there was nothing we could do without angering our girl, our options were very limited right now.

  So limited, in fact, about the only thing we could do was suck it the fuck up.

  Chapter Fifteen – Zoey

  Everyone could tell I didn’t want to be fucked with the next time I worked at the Dollhouse. Even the customers I served knew, just by glancing at my face, I was not in the mood for their flirty attitudes or wandering hands. And, of course, Roman and Carter weren’t here, so I actually had to, you know, work.

  The absolute horror.

  I was on my break, standing in the back of the Dollhouse, just outside the side door. I leaned my back against the brick building, staring up at the night sky, at the moon hanging there. My jacket sat over my shoulders; even though I was near the door, I’d learned it was never good to go on your break while wearing next to nothing. It would only invite the occasional pervert to try to take up your time.

  Why couldn’t things be simple for me? Why couldn’t I just be happy? You’d think
that, after the whole thing with my sister and my ex, anything would be better, but all this shit with Roman and Lake… it wasn’t better. I was responsible for it, I knew, even though I’d known all along I could never have both.

  Or, really, all—since Carter and Roman were pretty much a package deal.

  Having them all was selfish and unrealistic. Most girls didn’t have multiple boyfriends, especially girls who came from a family like mine. It just didn’t happen.

  Hah, if my parents could see me now, they’d label me a hussy. A slut, a whore who opened her legs for anyone and everyone, and you know what? I didn’t care. I didn’t care what they’d think about me now, because they were not good people. They could literally go fuck themselves while jumping off a bridge and I still wouldn’t care.

  I wouldn’t even go to their funeral, I didn’t think.

  Was that cruel? Maybe, but it was true.

  Fuck my parents.

  Heaving a sigh, I was about to go back inside, figuring there was no point in prolonging my break when working would make the time go by faster, but the moment I turned to go back inside, someone else was walking out.

  Crystal.

  I’d be the first to admit, she and I hadn’t really talked much lately. I’d been so lost in my own world, not to mention paranoid that she felt negative things about me after I pretty much stole Roman and Carter out from under her—along with the money they gave.

  “Oh, good,” Crystal spoke once she saw me, “I was hoping you’d still be out here. I need to talk to you.”

  Even though I had no idea what it could be about, my heart still sunk. For whatever reason, I knew this couldn’t be good. I returned to where I’d been standing, watching as Crystal came with me.

  She leaned on the wall beside me, a fuzzy jacket around her shoulders as she stared out at the parking lot surrounding us. Not another soul in sight. The back was where the girls and Autumn parked their cars during their shifts; customers were not allowed back here. We had a gate around it, along with a bouncer guarding it, very similar to the man who stood near the Dollhouse’s doors, always ready to leap into action should someone get too handsy or rough with one of the girls.

  “What’s up?” I asked, not feeling very talkative in general. Still, for Crystal to seek me out like this, it had to be something.

  Crystal let out a sigh, and it was a while before she spoke, “Look, I don’t know everything that’s going on with you, but I know you’re tangled up with Roman—a lot more than anyone else here ever has been. He, uh… the other night, Carter brought Lake here.”

  Carter brought… what? Oh, Roman and I needed to have a little chat. Didn’t I tell him no more kidnappings?

  She must’ve seen the worry on my face, for she quickly added, “He’s fine, I saw him walk out of here just after.” Crystal acted like she wanted to say more, but she stopped herself, her lips curling into a frown.

  Well, it was a relief that Lake walked out of here, at least. Ugh, you’d think he would’ve wanted to talk to me after, but… but then again, maybe it was the last straw. One kidnapping too many. Maybe Lake was officially done with me, wrote me off because of everything Roman did. I couldn’t blame him for doing that, but I could get hella pissed at Roman for it. “What happened?” Crystal probably didn’t know, but I figured it was good to ask, just in case.

  “Carter brought Lake into the backroom with Roman,” she said.

  My mind immediately raced. Did Roman threaten him? Was it all to get Lake alone, away from me, to force him to let me go? Goddamn it, I’d told him—

  “It was maybe a few minutes after that when Carter found me,” Crystal went on, breaking through my thoughts as she explained, “it sounded like Roman wanted me to seduce Lake, so I… I tried. When Carter gives you an order from Roman, you don’t say no.”

  If my heart could’ve fallen out of my chest and sunk down to the concrete below, it would’ve. Roman had Crystal seduce Lake? Fuck. What the hell was Roman thinking? Was he trying to get Lake out of the picture, so he all but forced him to be with Crystal while knowing I needed my men to be mine and mine alone?

  I mean, look at the woman standing next to me, for God’s sake. She was beautiful, busty, and blonde. The three Bs all men loved, even if they didn’t admit it. No straight male would ever say no to her if she came onto them full force, not even Lake.

  It didn’t even occur to me that something else could’ve happened, that Lake could’ve denied her even though she was drop-dead gorgeous, but then I realized what she’d told me: she tried. She tried, meaning, she didn’t succeed.

  “Lake wouldn’t let me,” Crystal said, reaffirming my realization and literally lifting the invisible weight off my heart. “He pushed me off him, and then he…” Her lips curled into a smile at the memory. “Then he actually had the balls to confront Roman. I didn’t see much of it, but what I did see was hot—definitely made me look at Lake in a new light, you know? I always thought he was just the dorky nerd living in my building, but he has to have balls to go toe-to-toe with Roman.”

  At this point, I had no idea what the hell to say, how to respond to her without sounding stupid or telling her I needed to leave for the night. A part of me wanted to rush home and confront Lake, while another part of me wanted to yell at Roman for trying something so dirty and underhanded.

  “I might not know the whole story,” Crystal went on, setting her hands on her hips as she studied me, “but I’m smart enough to know it’s all about you, babe.” She laughed, though it wasn’t a very hearty one. “I guess there’s just something about you, Zoey. You’re like catnip to those guys.”

  I wasn’t sure if I should be proud of that or not. With how crazy everything had been, my guess was at the latter.

  “If I’m honest, I was a bit jealous, at first,” Crystal admitted with a shrug. “But then I remembered how I don’t want to be here for the rest of my life. I want to make something of myself, and I know I can’t do that at the Dollhouse. The tips were nice, but…” She heaved a sigh. “I think I’m going to start to look for another job. A real job. I don’t have a college degree, so I don’t know what’s out there for me, but… I need to try.”

  Hey, I didn’t have a degree either. I walked away from it all, unable to stand the thought of remaining in Hillcrest after finding my ex with my sister. I had no idea what my future would hold past this place, but I wasn’t at the point in my life where I wanted to sit down and think about it; Crystal clearly was, and no matter what happened, I’d support her. We might not be the closest of friends, but she’d helped me out when I had no one. I owed her.

  “If you need any help, you know I’m always around,” I told her, smiling softly. I was sad to hear she was leaving the Dollhouse, but that didn’t mean she was moving out of the building. I’d still see her around. Maybe she and I could become better friends.

  Of course, all that aside, I was still pretty ticked off at Roman for doing what he did, still worried about what Lake thought of me. If Roman brought him here, I doubted he’d kept the fact that I also worked here to himself. No, I bet he told Lake everything, tried to get him to turn on me and let Crystal seduce him.

  But he didn’t. Lake had proved Roman wrong; Crystal said so herself, and she had no reason to lie to me about it.

  “Thanks,” Crystal spoke, grinning. “And if you ever need help with Roman, you know where to find me.”

  I laughed, although I wasn’t quite sure what kind of help she meant.

  Since my break was over, I went back inside. Considering what Crystal told me, I was in a decent mood all of a sudden. Like, maybe, through the clouds and the storm, I could finally see daylight, the end to this dark, ever-lasting tunnel. If there was nothing left between Lake and me, he wouldn’t have denied Crystal. And Roman… Lake doing that had to prove to him that he did in fact care about me.

  Was that what all of this was about? Was it some weird, crazy test of Roman’s? I wouldn’t put it past him, because that man woul
d do anything to get what he wanted, and somehow, still, that something was me. Me and me alone.

  But I would not come without a cost. If he wanted to have me, to truly have me, he would have to learn to share a bit.

  Roman Russo sharing with someone other than Carter. It sounded almost funny in my head.

  By the time my shift ended, I was actually happy. Not overly thrilled, mind you, but happy enough. Content with where my life was at, even if things were a little messy right now. It was only a matter of time before I saw Roman again, before he either admitted what he did or I confronted him about it. Either way, it would happen, just like something would happen with Lake.

  The next time I saw Lake, I planned on having a long chat with him. Even if he knew everything now, I still wanted to come clean about it myself, to admit it to him myself. Tell him that I never wanted to hide anything from him.

  I didn’t. I just… how could anyone explain the situation I found myself in? I didn’t even know how the hell it happened, why Roman refused to let me go, why I couldn’t just be another girl from the Dollhouse. There was something about me, I guess, something that called out to him, and you know what? Something about that crazy suit-wearing man called out to me too, just as something did from Carter and Lake.

  I really did care about all of them, in different ways. I needed them in my life, while I figured out who I was. Whether or not they’d still be in my life ten years from now didn’t matter. All that mattered was the here and the now, and I refused to stand by and watch it pass me by in a blur.

  As I walked home, I pictured what I was going to say to Roman when I saw him next, how I’d ream into him, probably talk to him in a way no one else would ever get away with. I imagined how annoyed he’d be with me, too. Truthfully, I enjoyed riling him up, making him mad. The angry fucking was kind of like I was getting my cake and eating it, too.