“Now, I have a few demands I must insist on. You will eat your dinner - every morsel on your plate. And then you must have dessert. A big piece of chocolate cake that would make Ayden’s eyes fill with delight. Doctor’s orders.”
Heath made me laugh. “All right, Doctor Dalton, you win,” I replied, allowing myself a smile.
“I always do, my lovely Lillian.”
We stepped out of the restaurant after a long, enjoyable meal into a light, glistening snow that fell over the city, creating a magical mood. Heath amused me when he held his hat then tilted his head back and stuck out his tongue - attempting to capture a snowflake, just as we used to when we were little. It was one of the few childlike things Heath allowed himself to do.
“I like it when you’re silly,” I said, and giggled. Heath grinned and mischievously went to scoop up a snowball.
“Don’t you dare!” I ordered.
With little warning, he hurled the snow at me, and it landed in my hair.
I responded with a larger snowball and charged him. Heath ran a short distance, then, laughing, whipped around and waited for me to catch up to him, but just as I approached him I slipped on a patch of black ice, and in an instant I was falling forward. Heath reacted with lightning speed and swept me up before I landed on the cold, hard sidewalk.
“Lillian, are you all right?”
“I’m fine,” I answered, staring up at his distraught face.
Heath cradled me protectively as the snowfall suddenly turned heavy. Wet flakes left a thin layer that covered his hat and the back of his coat.
“I’m sorry for making you fall,” he said softly, pressing his cold cheek against mine.
I held desperately onto Heath, presumably for the last time, and drank in his never-ending love for me. I closed my eyes and allowed his hot breath to burn my neck, imagining just for a moment that we were husband and wife. It seemed as if everything in my life was just a wishful, fleeting moment.
I gazed out the window of my hotel room, watching the snow fall inches every hour that night, smothering the city with three feet of heavy white snow by dawn. I didn’t sleep at all. Instead, I sat frozen in a chair, my mind consumed with turmoil. I knew that very evening Heath went to be Sarah after he walked me to my room. He didn’t depart with an embrace or soft kiss to my cheek. As he walked away, I felt the weight on my heart grow heavier until I could barely take a breath. I fell into a chair and wasn’t able to move until the blinding light of day streamed into my rooms.
I rose from the chair, closed the heavy, wine-colored velvet drapes, and crawled into bed. I was tired, drained, and emotionally spent. I felt as though I had lost a piece of my heart when I discovered that Heath had taken Sarah back to his suite that night. I had not expected to find her lying in Heath’s arms, sleeping soundly, with her lips curved into a blissful smile. Heath didn’t hear me knock as he dozed, didn’t know I had come in through the connecting door to tell him there would be no court that day due to the blizzard. The streets were impassable, doors of the buildings blocked in by mounds of drifting snow.
What did I expect? My mind screamed as I fell to my knees beside the bed where they slept peacefully in one another’s arms after an intimate night together. I couldn’t have both brothers. I’d had to choose, and I chose Ayden. But the second my eyes fell on Heath and the woman I’d pushed him to be with, I instantly regretted my decision. At that moment, I wanted Heath to be mine. I wanted to be the one sleeping in his strong arms, lying happy and fulfilled after sharing myself with the man I was born to love.
As I stared at Heath while he slept, I became overwhelmed with anger. How quickly he’d forgotten about me, taken Sarah into his bed, and loved her with passion and fervor I could only imagine.
I don’t know how long I watched them sleep; I was in some kind of trance, and it was only when Heath stirred that panic caused me to jump up and slip out of the room before he opened his eyes and saw me intruding on his rekindled love affair.
Heath rapped on my door not long after I buried myself under a pile of blankets and drowned my sorrows in sleep.
“Lillian, are you awake? There is no court today,” he said through the now locked adjoining door.
I didn’t answer him. Instead, I clutched my pillow against my face to muffle my sobbing.
“Lillian, are you all right? Open the door.”
“Go away!” I called.
“Are you sick? Please open the door!”
“I’m fine. I need to rest.”
“This is ridiculous. Open the door!” he ordered.
“Go away!” I yelled. I threw the glass of water I had sitting on my bed stand. It shattered when it hit the door.
Heath didn’t pursue me anymore. I pulled the covers back over my head and cried myself to sleep again. I didn’t wake to retrieve the trays of food left outside my door. I slept on through that day and the next as the city dug itself out from the record-breaking blizzard, just in time for Christmas Eve.
With no word from Ayden and only love lost between Heath and me, I remained locked away as other people merrily enjoyed the holiday. The hotel was festive, decorated with holiday splendor: fresh holly, mistletoe, wreaths made of Christmas tree trimmings, and a giant Norway spruce that soared fifty-four feet high in the center of the grand ballroom. This I had to hear from the young negro maid who insisted on looking after me.
“No one should be alone on Christmas,” she said, while changing the linens of my bed.
“I’m not alone; I simply choose isolation,” I mumbled while staring out the tall frosty windows.
“You’re too pretty to be locking yourself away. There is a Christmas Eve ball tonight. You should go.”
“Please mind your business, Sadie,” I snapped.
“Sure thing, Mrs. Dalton,” she replied and finished her duties without another word.
The halls of the hotel were bustling with comings and goings. Most guests were on their way to the ballroom by eight that evening. Heath had knocked repeatedly on my door, begged for me to let him in, but I remained silent, refusing to say one word to the man who had innocently broken my heart.
“Why are you doing this? I know you’re listening to me. Sadie tells me you are purposely keeping yourself locked away. You can’t stay in there forever. The trial resumes in two days.
“Lillian . . . Lillian! Open the door, talk to me. It’s Christmas Eve. I have a gift for you,” he said through the minute crack in the door.
I was on the other side of the door, tears soaking my face as I struggled to contain my cries. Heath sounded so desperate.
I held my ground and didn’t cave in. Finally Heath went away, and I collapsed onto my bed. There, I would spend the next two days until the morning I had to return to court to face the demons of my troubled past.
Heath was waiting for me in the lobby to escort me to the courthouse. It was only a few blocks from our hotel, but through crowded paths of snow it would take twice as long to walk there as usual.
When Heath saw me for the first time in several days, he gasped and took hold of my hand. “Dear God, Lillian, you look so pale, so frail!”
I felt weak and shaky and leaned into him only to prevent myself from falling. My bloodshot eyes had dark blue circles under them; my lips were dry and cracked. I had lost so much weight from the constant nausea that my dress no longer clung to my once shapely curves.
“Let’s get this over with,” I said, refusing to look up at him.
“I’m taking you back to your room. You can’t sit on the witness stand like this. I knew I should have broken down the door to get to you!”
I snatched my arm from his grip and briskly walked ahead.
“What is the matter?” Heath bellowed and grabbed hold of me.
“Let me go. I don’t need you anymore. I can take care of myself!”
“No, you can’t. Have you seen what you look like?”
“Leave me alone,” I hissed.
“That’s all you
want, isn’t it? For me to leave you alone, to turn away, and forget all about you. Well, I refuse to do that!”
“Oh, really,” I sneered. “Is that so?”
Heath appeared confused and stunned by my angry outburst. I left him standing there, looking bewildered; I simply refused to have him take me to the courthouse.
Each step I took through the inches of snow that remained on the city sidewalks was exhausting. The narrow paths were filled with inconsiderate people continually pushing into me as they hastily made their way to wherever they were going, causing me to fall into a huge mound of snow. A kind gentleman lifted me out and helped me up. “Are you all right, miss?” he asked, before he hurried on his way.
“Yes, I’m perfectly fine.”
I brushed off the snow from my coat with my gloved hands, but found myself disoriented. The glare off the snow was blinding, and I couldn’t focus on what direction I needed to go. I found myself instinctively traveling along with the flow of foot traffic and luckily found my way to the courthouse. With what strength I had left, I entered and wearily scanned the room for Felix or Seymour. Neither was there, yet the courtroom was nearly filled. I spotted Judith, who threw me her customary bitter scowl, and Rachael standing with Sterling over in a far corner. I slowly made my way to the front row and got to my seat just as we all had to rise for the judge. Felix and Seymour hurried in, along with the defense team. Richard was a step in front and glanced over my way before he sat. Instantly, I shifted my line of vision to Felix. He appeared as calm and assured as ever, unlike myself. I was a bundle of nerves.
This was it, the day I had been dreading. It came so fast, I felt suddenly overwhelmed and alarmed with the task ahead of me. Now I regretted telling Heath to stay away. I needed his support, his strength, and his comfort.
“The prosecution calls Lillian Dalton to the stand,” the bailiff called out.
With momentous effort, I stood and slowly, slowly made my way to the stand. Time seemed to be moving in slow motion, voices around me were garbled, faces blurred. I slumped against the wooden box and painstakingly raised my right hand and placed my left hand on the Bible, taking my oath.
As I dropped into the chair, I gazed out into the audience, looking for Heath. But to my dismay, he wasn’t there. I gulped hard, but there was no moisture in my arid mouth to swallow.
Felix stood, greeted the jury, and was about to begin the long day of questioning, when all of the sudden the courtroom doors burst open.
* * *
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Leaving New York
Everyone instinctively turned around and gasped with fright. Norman Griffin rushed in like a crazed psychopath with a face twisted with rage and gun in hand, heading straight for me.
“She is the devil! She is the devil that killed my boy! I might have taken his life, but she’s the one who drove him to hell!” he shrieked. And in the midst of gunshots, pandemonium, madness, and terror, the room began to spin out of control and I felt myself slowly sinking away into a dark, silent abyss.
My heavy lids lifted, revealing a strange, unfamiliar room, but one recognizable face. Heath stood smiling at me over my bedside, holding my hand as I came out of my deep sleep.
“Hello there, sleepy girl,” he said softly, and squeezed my hands.
“What happened? Did I get shot?” I murmured.
“No, you just passed out. You’re fine. You were very dehydrated, though.” Heath pulled up a chair and sat down. He looked relieved in one sense, but retained a serious, concerned expression on his handsome face. “It’s all over now,” he sighed. “As soon as you’re better, I will take you home to Jasper Island.”
“But the trial . . .”
“It’s over. Norman Griffin, in a religious frenzy, murdered his own son. He was ranting and raving about sin and the devil and unholy acts just before the gun went off. I was there in the back of the room where you couldn’t see me. The attorneys all rushed him, just as you fainted, but it was Richard who tackled Norman to the ground. That’s when the gun went off for the last time. Norman was shot in the gut by his own bullet and died moments later.”
“It’s all over,” I sobbed. “Really over?”
Heath smiled, and cleared his throat, appearing uncomfortable. Then added, “There is more good news. You’re with child. You are carrying Ayden’s baby.”
Through his artificial smile, I saw the pain the announcement caused him.
“A baby . . . A baby?” I repeated disbelievingly.
“That’s why you were sick all these weeks. It all makes sense now.”
I closed my eyes and thought of Ayden. He was going to be a father; his baby was growing inside me. I just couldn’t believe it. And I readily welcomed the thought of giving Ayden a child, embraced my unexpected pregnancy with elation, although I had naïvely sworn in the past never to bear a child for any man.
“The doctor says you should be well enough to travel in a day or two,” Heath said. “You get all the rest you can. You have a baby to think about now, yours and Ayden‘s baby.”
I wanted to call for Heath to stay, but couldn’t find courage. Instead, I allowed him walk away without telling him how sorry I was, and no matter what happened in life, I would always love him.
The morning that Heath and I were to return to the lighthouse station it was sunny, clear, and unusually mild. I’d packed my things the night before, anxious to leave New York City and never return.
I was feeling much better. I was hydrated and nourished, my energy and strength had returned. I hadn’t heard a word from Ayden, and that concerned me. I worried that something had happened during the blizzard that barreled through the East Coast. The sooner I got back to him, the happier I was going to be, and hopefully our lives would quickly fall back into place - just where we left off.
Heath kept a fair distance from me after he brought me back to the hotel. I hadn’t seen any sign of Sarah and didn’t care to know where she was. Felix came by to thank me and wish me all the best. “I hear you are expecting. Congratulations,” He placed a sweet kiss on my cheek, and then went next door to say goodbye to Heath.
Next, an unexpected and most unwelcome visitor came by. Heath spotted Richard coming down the corridor of our floor and blocked him from trying to reach me. “Lillian doesn’t want to see you,” Heath informed him. I heard the scuffle and hurried out to stop it.
“It’s all right. I will see him. For only a moment,” I said, I threw Richard a look of stern warning. Heath reluctantly let go of Richard’s collar and backed away.
“I will be standing here with the door open,” Heath informed Richard, glaring at him.
Richard straightened his hat and picked up a package that had fallen to the floor, and then followed me into my suite.
“Make this brief, Richard,” I ordered, and then sat down with my arms folded across my chest.
Richard took off his hat and held it in his trembling hands. He was unusually nervous, and that made me laugh to myself.
“If you are here to receive a word of gratitude, you can forget it,” I snapped.
“I am not here for a thank you. I am here to apologize to you,” he began. He fell to one knee before me. “I don’t expect you to ever forgive me. I have done terrible things to you, of which I am deeply ashamed. You were an innocent girl. I know that. If I could go back in time and change it all, I would. I would have never taken advantage of you the way I did. Please believe me when I tell you that I did love you . . . and still do.”
Heath barged in and yanked Richard to his feet. “That’s enough!”
“Heath, stop! Wait in your rooms,” I shouted.
“He’s a snake. Don’t listen to anything he says!”
“I came to bring you this.” He quickly handed me the small package. “And to say I am sorry. I’m not the man you think I am. I’ve changed, Lillian. My world hasn’t been the same since you left. There has been no light in my life since you’ve been gone. I am deeply in love with
you; I have been since the moment I laid eyes on you. Please don’t frown like that, don’t shun me. Remember all we shared, what we meant to one another, how beautiful it was . . . Can we start over? I will make it up to you, I swear I will,” he begged. Heath had heard enough. He rushed over and forcefully lifted Richard off his knees by the back of his collar and tossed him out without wasting another moment.
“He won’t bother you anymore,” Heath promised me and slammed the door shut. I sat quietly crying with the package in my hands, knowing what was inside. “It’s Momma’s journal.” I choked through my tears. “It wasn’t burnt after all. Richard must have found it in Judith’s possession.”
Heath knew what it meant to me as I cried on his shoulder. “All is well now,” he assured me, “You can go back to Jasper Island with the burden of your past lifted off your shoulders, carrying only what rightfully belongs to you.”
“Can I truly ever be happy? Will I ever find the meaning to my life?” I sobbed while clinging desperately to him.
“The baby inside you is the meaning,” he said in a light, whispery breath. “And you will be happy. You deserve it more than anyone.”
Just as when we took our journey to New York, Heath and I didn’t talk much. I wondered what his plans were with Sarah Van Dorn, yet I chose not to ask. Heath was quiet and forlorn every time he believed I wasn’t looking his way. However, when my eyes rested on him, he gave me a genuine smile, which was intended to make me believe he was happy.
The stagecoach brought us into the harbor village just as dusk approached. Heath had just lifted me out and placed me on the ground in front of the general store, when he spotted James, Jr.
“James, James, Jr.!” Heath called. James, Jr. waved and headed our way, just as a small man walking out from the store tripped on his shoelaces and toppled down the stairs, landing at Heath’s feet. I jumped back. Heath bent down and lifted the elderly man, who winced in pain.
Box Set: The ArringtonTrilogy Page 89
