Shadows and Stars

by Becca Fanning

  I was too weird for my own good sometimes.

  “Erm…Zara?”

  “Mmm?”

  “Where are we actually going to go?” I asked.

  “What do you mean?”

  “I’m crashing at Devon’s, and I don’t think they’ll appreciate us…”

  “…barely making it through the front door before ripping our clothes off and devouring each other in their hallway?”

  “Pretty much. Though that could be fun, there’s a lot of mirrors about.”

  “A lot of mirrors?”

  “A weird quirk of Tate’s.” And this time I really did mean Tate and not Ayra. Though now she was a vampire, Tate didn’t seem quite so fixated on them. And it wasn’t because of the stupid rumours that we couldn’t be seen in them. That was a load of balls.

  “She has a lot of those.”

  “Don’t we all?” I asked. “It’s what makes us interesting.”

  “I don’t think I do. I think I erased them all.” She sounded sad and, despite my best instincts, I took one of my hands off the wheel and entwined it with the one on my leg.

  “Then we find them again,” I whispered. “I assure you, they’re there. But if you don’t believe so, then we’ll find them together.”

  “I…”

  “I promise, Zara,” I said before she could give whatever denial she was concocting.

  “Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome.” I wouldn’t lie, I felt kind of smug over that one admission. I didn’t get the impression that many people spent much time on Zara, nor had they when she was growing up. By comparison, I’d had it easy. At least my mum had loved me and showed me as much.

  “It won’t be easy.” Her voice was hoarse, and I didn’t think the words were going to come very easily now.

  She clearly wasn’t comfortable. But saying that, I wasn’t going to push her either. At least, not yet.

  Zara took a deep breath. “You’re giving me something no one ever has,” she admitted.

  “I get it,” I replied. “But I can be that if you want me to be,” I added.

  “Thank you. I think.”

  We lapsed into silence, the two of us lost in thoughts of growing up as halflings. Our life wasn’t an easy one to be born into. Especially given we had no choice.

  “What do you think the children of halflings are called?” I blurted out.

  “What?” Zara said, a small laugh escaping from her.

  “Would they be quarterlings?”

  She laughed again. “I’d guess so, but I’d say most halflings don’t have children.” There was a wistful note in her voice, one that suggested this was a dream she had, or had in the past, and one she was trying to let go of.

  “There’s nothing to say we can’t though. We have all the right bits.”

  “Are you seriously talking to me about children?”

  “Children are a conversation we should have if we’re going to have sex.” I shrugged and let go of her hand to shift gears. Thankfully, she left her hand on my leg, meaning the kids conversation hadn’t scared her off completely. Yet.

  “No, birth control is a conversation we should be having if we’re going to have sex,” she pointed out.

  “Will you make us use some?”

  “Of course,” she insisted.

  “Then doesn’t that imply you think kids are possible?”

  “Or it implies that I’ve got no idea where you’ve been,” she countered quickly.

  A little too quickly if anyone asked me. There was an almost defensive note in her voice, as if she didn’t want to accept what she was saying.

  “I haven’t had sex in a year,” I admitted.

  “I’m sorry, what?” she blurted. “Even I’ve had it more recently than that.”

  And there she went again, sounding a little bitter about it. Whoever the man was that had made her feel like that, I was going to strangle him.

  Okay, strangling someone was a little beyond me. But I could scare him with a little bit of fang. Maybe. I was quite possibly over estimating my scariness.

  “I went through a break-up. It’s pretty much been a no sex zone for me.” Until her. Something about Zara was still calling to me in a way no one else ever had.

  “Oh. I’m sorry. Do you still miss her?”

  “Him,” I corrected. “And no, not really. He wanted very different things to me.”

  “So other men?”

  “Pretty much.” When I thought back over what Kevin had done to me, I always realised he’d never properly loved me. He couldn’t when he’d been off sleeping with just about any man who’d have him. Sometimes, I even felt like he’d just kept me around to keep house for him. The poor little halfling vampire who couldn’t do any better than a cheating wanker. Lucky for me, I wasn’t as weak as anyone thought.

  I glanced over at Zara, scared I’d scared her off, but she just looked lost in thought.

  “I’m sorry,” she said eventually. “I know it’s cheesy to say when I barely know you, but you’re a good man, Marcus, you didn’t deserve that.”

  “Thanks.”

  “I mean it.”

  “I know…but no jokes about you not having the parts to interest me?” I teased, trying to change the conversation.

  Zara shrugged. “You wouldn’t kiss me like you do if you weren’t interested in me. And besides, you mentioned when we met you were into men too.”

  “And you’re alright with that?”

  “Why wouldn’t I be? It doesn’t matter who you like in general, just who you like in the moment.”

  “Exactly.”

  “Plus, it opens up the option of having a threesome with you and another man.”

  I growled, not happy with that image at all.

  “Or not,” she amended quickly.

  “I’m a one person man, Zara. In and out of the bedroom.”

  “Alright, duly noted. And I was kidding… Mostly?”

  I tensed my jaw, hoping I didn’t sound too bitter. “Mostly?” If she liked having multiple partners, that really was something I needed to come to terms with. I couldn’t exactly force her to kill a part of herself. But the idea of sharing her with other men or women… No. That didn’t seem fun at all.

  “I’m usually a zero person woman…”

  “I’m sorry.”

  She laughed harshly, but I knew it wasn’t aimed at me. “For what? It’s not your fault.”

  “Doesn’t mean I’m not sorry. I don’t like that people hurt you.”

  She shrugged, as if she didn’t care. But I knew she did. From all the things she’d told me and the way she acted, it was very clear that she cared loads. About everything and anything that had ever been said to and about her. People could be cruel and from the looks of it, Dragons hadn’t escaped that little fun treat.

  I turned the corner and realised I’d driven to Devon’s building after all. Maybe they weren’t home though. It wasn’t that late and Ayra might have dragged him to the lake to stare at their egg all night. At least, from the stories he told me, that was the kind of thing that wasn’t out of the usual. His roaring car came to a silence in the parking space and I stared at Zara and her beautiful dark eyes.

  “They might not be home?” I suggested, gulping audibly as she moved her hand on my lap again. If she wasn’t careful, we’d really be bursting through the doors while half at it.

  “Let’s find out,” she grinned, gently squeezing my leg and awakening a desire I hadn’t felt for a long time. Not until I met her.

  We hurried out of the car, giggling and kissing like two teenagers. It felt carefree and happy, as if the world couldn’t touch us with their ugly whispers and awful stares. In a way, they couldn’t. Despite all the horrible experiences we shared simply because of our heritage, we still found each other. We still… Connected.

  I jingled the keys impatiently, hoping to find an empty house for long enough that I could show Zara just how much I wanted her. The lock clicked and laughing, Zara
and I stumbled inside the open living room.

  “Good evening.”

  Silenced, I turned to find Devon and Ayra waiting in the white armchairs. Aaaaand down it went.

  “Evening,” Zara muttered, her ears turning red. She clearly hadn’t expected to be welcomed in. And neither did I. What were they both doing here?

  “I didn’t realise you guys would be home.” I scratched the back of my neck and gestured to Zara. “You know Zara, right? Zara, Ay— Tate. Devon.” Damn, I kept tripping over their names. If she was going to spend more time with me, we definitely needed to tell her before I slipped up and forced our hand.

  “We weren’t planning on being home,” Ayra sighed, fidgeting nervously with the small watch around her wrist. “My poor little egg is by the lake all alone.”

  “You could visit? I can watch the house,” I suggested, nudging my head slightly towards Zara. Hoping that my friend would get the hint and take her husband out of the house.

  “We can’t,” Devon added, pushing himself up from the dreadful couches. Why they ever picked those sterile looking things was beyond me. He paced around the coffee table and nerves sparked up inside of me. He was usually the grounded one, so whatever was going on, this must be big.

  “What’s wrong?”

  A clanging and cluttering pulled all of our attention towards the kitchen and a tall figure with a sandwich appeared. He chewed obnoxiously with his mouth open and I didn’t particularly like the way he was eyeing Zara.

  “Who is he?” I asked, pointing at the man I already disliked wholeheartedly.

  “This is Léon,” Ayra introduced, and from the looks of it, she didn’t seem to happy with him either.

  “Right. And who is Léon?” I inquired, using the worst French accent I could muster. It probably wasn’t right to make fun of one of Ayra’s guests, but something about him was rubbing me the wrong way. His pants were just a little too low, his jacket a little too torn, and his manners just far too dickish.

  “He’s your…” She paused and shot me an apologetic look. “Your mate.”

  “Excuse me?” My eyes widened and my jaw practically dropped to the floor. That was impossible, I had no mate. I was ensured many, many times that halflings didn’t have mates.

  Ayra shook her head, a sadness dancing in her eyes. “No, not yours.” She pointed at Zara and her next word came out as a whisper. “Yours.”

  NINE

  “NO.” I refused to believe this was true. She told me she was a halfling, that she had no mate. And now this dick showed up claiming to be hers?

  “Marcus…” Ayra placed her hand on my shoulder in an attempt to comfort me.

  “No,” I repeated, shaking my head in denial. I finally met someone I really liked, and now it was over before it even started?

  “Marcus,” Zara tried, shooting me an apologetic look. She seemed as shocked as I was, but I wasn’t sure if that was a good or bad thing.

  “You said you were a halfling,” I hissed, resentment bubbling up inside of me. I thought she was like me, that she understood. That she knew what it was to live an unmated life in a world of mates. And now it turned out that she had someone all along?

  “I am,” she protested, glancing at Léon. He flashed his teeth and shot her a wink. The way he was looking at her was so predatory and vile, I wanted to throw up. Or punch him in the gut. Even if he wanted to claim Zara, he couldn’t. She was with me now. I wanted her more than he could ever understand.

  “Then how do you have a mate?”

  “I don’t know…”

  I pointed at the French bastard and bared my fangs. “How do you even know it’s true? Where did he even come from?”

  “He said he talked to your Father,” Ayra added, looking guilty for even bringing it up.

  “It’s true,” Léon grinned, throwing his phone on the table. Loudly, he smacked his lips and got up, curling his arm around Zara without even asking permission. “I’ll explain, sweet cheeks. Your mother wasn’t who she claimed she was. You were a full dragon all along and that means, you have a mate. And that’s me.” He glared at me and hissed. “You have no business with my mate. Now run home, little vampire.”

  “Zara?” Ultimately, this was up to her. Whether she was a halfling or not, it was her choice whether she did or didn’t want to be with me. And this Léon, whoever he was, could get the fuck out.

  She eyed the newcomer warily and I saw the confusion behind her eyes. She was calculating, tallying, figuring out what was going on. And one of us was going to get the short end of the sick. I just hoped it wasn’t me.

  “Marcus… I’m sorry, but—”

  “Never mind,” I cut her off, her explanation not necessary. Her apology said everything I needed to know. She wanted him. A stranger she only met five minutes ago.

  I balled my hands into fists and shoved them in my pockets. I should’ve figured. Why was I kidding myself into thinking that a halfling like me could ever find love? I nodded at Ayra and Devon, knowing that I lost the fight. “Thanks for your hospitality. Guess I’m going back to the city.”

  “Are you sure? You can stay the night at least,” Ayra tried, concern riddling her voice.

  “Nah, thanks. I’ve got no reason to stay,” I spat out bitterly, turning on my heels so I no longer had to look at Léon.

  “Marcus, wait.” Zara slipped her arm into mine and forced me to face her. “I didn’t know. I promise you, I didn’t know.”

  The sincerity shone through and as much as I wanted to be an asshole, I understood. I shrugged her touch away, realising this was the last time I’d feel her skin against mine, and buried my anger deep inside. “I get it.”

  “I’m so, so sorry. I really wish it hadn’t happened like this… But I’ve wanted this for my whole life. Even if it doesn’t turn out to be true, I need to see this through.”

  I janked the door out of its lock and swallowed the lump in my throat. “It’s fine. Good luck.”

  The door slammed before I could do anything about it. And while I felt bad for Ayra and Devon’s place, it really wasn’t the first thing on my mind.

  All that was playing through my mind was the look on Zara’s face when Ayra had told her mate had arrived.

  The worst bit was not being able to blame her. I’d spent many a night wishing my fate wasn’t sealed, and that I too had a mate.

  Right now wasn’t the time to dwell on that. I needed to get away from here. Away from the woman I’d been ready to give my heart to. Before she’d ripped it out and stomped on it that was.

  Pulling Devon’s keys from my pocket, I unlocked the door and switched on the sat nav, asking it to take me to wherever the last place the couple had set it to. I didn’t really care where I went, just so long as it wasn’t here.

  TEN

  HUH. No wonder Ayra liked it here. There was a peace about the mysterious lake she kept talking about. I should have known this would be where the sat nav brought me. With Ayra so egg obsessed, Devon had surely set the position to here so she wouldn’t get lost.

  Silly Ayra.

  I picked up a rock and tossed it over in my hand. It was smooth and round and just about perfect. Standing up, I took a few steps towards the lake. Whipping my hand back, I skimmed the stone, watching as it made ripples on the water. I missed large bodies of water. Living in a city was great and all, but there was no nature around me.

  A soft beating of wings drew me from my contemplation of the lake. Wait, wings? That wasn’t right. Or maybe it was. Maybe Devon wanted his car back. I had just driven off without checking if I could use it. Minus Marc points for me.

  I turned around and spluttered in shock. I hadn’t actually seen a dragon before, but what was in front of me wasn’t what I expected. Not from what Ayra had told me.

  The pearlescent blue dragon hovering in front of me was stunning. I couldn’t actually find words to describe her. But she was also…how to put it? Her size reminded me of a certain sarcastic guardian dragon from a children�
�s cartoon I’d loved as a child.

  Huh. Maybe I should have guessed I’d end up with a dragon just from the love I had for the creatures as a boy.

  “Zara?” I whispered, hoping she’d be able to work out what I was saying. I didn’t see any reason why she wouldn’t.

  The little dragon nodded. I hoped she’d shift into human form, that way we could actually have a conversation.

  Somehow, she took my hint. The tiny dragon exploded outwards, forming into the beautiful woman I’d spent my last few evenings with.

  A very naked beautiful woman.

  I was really regretting still wearing jeans. I should have changed into sweatpants, things were growing uncomfortably tight downstairs.

  Again.

  Hastily, I stripped off my shirt and handed it to her.

  “Thanks,” Zara muttered, her eyes not leaving my now bare chest.

  Maybe taking my shirt off wasn’t the best idea either. Though the sight of her now wearing it was hot. Very hot. And doing nothing for how tight my jeans were feeling. If she touched me, I might well explode at this rate.

  We stared at each other, a hunger in our eyes that could hardly be denied. At least, it was definitely in her eyes, and I was pretty sure it was in mine too. There was no way for me to know for sure without a mirror though.

  “So…” I prompted eventually, having swallowed the lump which had formed in my throat.

  “Marcus…” she croaked.

  “You know, I actually understand it,” I started. “You’ve waited your whole life for Léon, or someone like him. And now he’s appeared. I’d do exactly the same.”

  Wow. I sounded far more bitter than I meant to.

  “I…”

  “I don’t want to hear about how perfect he is for you, Zara. Please don’t do that to me.” I would beg more if I had to. I really didn’t want to hear her even say his name. It would drive home just how much I’d lost by her no longer being mine. That wasn’t something I could, or wanted to, deal with.

  “That’s not why I’m here,” she replied.