What You Deserve : A Gem Stone Book

by Mary Martel

  “Are we ready for the service to start? If I may?” Though worded as questions, they came out sounding like thinly veiled commands.

  The man had impeccable timing.

  Franklin stepped back and I immediately missed the warmth of his body. Until this moment I hadn’t realized just how cold I was all the time.

  It was the beginning of June and the sun was up in the sky shining brightly. It had to be at least eighty degrees out, and the longer we stayed out here the hotter it would become. This was the sole purpose to doing this in the late morning instead of the afternoon when it’d be scorching outside in the direct sun. We could have done it earlier, but my mother claimed doing anything before ten a.m. was positively indecent.

  Franklin took hold of my hand in a gentle but firm hold and pulled me back. I turned and followed him, ignoring Riley’s loud protests and demands that Franklin take his hands off me at once. Not that he actually called him by name, of course, because he did not know it.

  Franklin and I both chose to ignore this, though I knew it was hard on the both of us to remain silent and motionless. We were both take action kind of people and would usually never let something like this slide without at least a little back talk, but we couldn’t do so here. Usually people expected it from me, but never did they see it coming from Franks.

  I very much appreciated him putting in the effort to bite down on it this time.

  Franklin escorted me back to my chair and helped me get reseated. He let my hand go only long enough to retrieve one of the empty metal folding chairs from a few rows back, which he carried up and placed beside mine. Then he took my hand back, intertwined our fingers, and placed our clasped hands on his hard thigh.

  My father sat back down beside me and my mother sat beside him on the other side.

  My mom turned a glare on Franklin and me, but gave up when my dad whispered something urgently to her. Guess it wasn’t worth causing another scene over. She could be an asshole, and she did this really well, but she liked to only do so in the privacy of her own home. She’d already showed too much of her real face today.

  The group of my sister’s friends sat down the aisle opposite my mother and filled in the seats. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Riley sitting front and center with Belinda and her jockstrap hero beside her. Belinda rested her head on his broad shoulder, and I could see the sheen of tears on her cheeks from all the way over here.

  Riley didn’t look at either of them or the people who sat behind him, even the one who reached forward and clapped him on the shoulder in a show of support.

  Riley ignored them all, and to my growing horror, he ignored my sister’s casket decorated in an array of beautiful flowers. He ignored the pastor who started talking about shit that didn’t matter to me and had absolutely nothing to do with my sister.

  He ignored everything except for me.

  And the longer the service went on, the tighter Franklin’s hold became on my hand.

  I wanted so badly to dig my cell phone out of my bag so I could call up Gin and tell her every little detail about what happened today. She would have been so amused and entertained by the whole damn thing.

  But I couldn’t call her.

  Not today.

  Not ever again.

  Because dead girls couldn’t take phone calls.

  Chapter Two

  Where’s Your Boyfriend

  Gem

  Funerals weren’t really meant for the dead, but for the people in attendance. It pissed me off, because this was all my mother and it should have been all about Gin.

  The only thing it had going for it was that it didn’t last longer than forty minutes and then it was over.

  I was forced to throw a handful of dirt down onto her lowered into the ground casket, and then I dropped a lovely pink rose on top as well. I would have hated the pink roses, but they were perfect for my twin. She would have loved them.

  Maybe my mother had gotten something right after all.

  It didn’t make me hate her any less.

  She probably got the pink roses because she thought they were pretty and it had nothing to do with my sister. There was really no telling with that woman.

  Franklin held my hand through the whole thing, and when it was over he didn’t hesitate to pull on my hand, drag me up to my feet, bend down to pick up my bag, and then hightail his ass out of there all the while dragging me along behind him. My mother didn’t shout after me, she had far too much class for that, but I did feel her heated eyes burning into my back the entire time I stumbled across the grass in my heels behind Franks.

  I’d ridden to the cemetery in the back of a limo with both my mother and my father, and it had been the most awkward car ride of my life. I hadn’t been looking forward to the ride back to my mother’s house.

  Something that felt a lot like a brick had settled in the center of my chest when I looked back over my shoulder to see another person toss a handful of dirt down on top of my sister’s lowered casket.

  It was done.

  It was over.

  It was official.

  My sister was dead and her body was in the ground. Soon, she’d be buried in six feet of dirt.

  Finally, they came, and no amount of blinking could stop them. A sob caught in my throat as the tears spilled out of my eyes, running down my cheeks.

  “Keep it together, Gemmy.” Franklin held my hand so tight it caused me physical pain. “You can lose your shit in the car. Not before. Don’t you dare start sobbing out here where she might see and then be able to use it against you later. Do not give her the ammunition, you’re smarter than that.”

  He was right, damn it. One-hundred-percent right.

  But I felt like I was slowly bleeding to death from a wound that would never heal. It was hard.

  I kept my head down and focused solely on my feet until we stopped beside Franklin’s black, murdered out G Wagon. If I cried big, ugly, messy tears in there, no one would be able to see me.

  Franklin dropped my hand and pulled his keys out of the front pocket of his pants. He hit a button on the key fob and the doors unlocked. He opened the door for me, and his hand went to the small of my back as he gently guided me toward the passenger seat.

  “Gem,” my dad called, and my head snapped up and around. He was maybe twenty feet away and closing in fast.

  Goddamned shit.

  “Get in the car, Gemmy.” Franklin practically shoved me into the front seat. He slammed the door shut, and I heard the locks click. He hadn’t tried to lock me in but locked my father out.

  They faced off against one another and exchanged heated words. Franklin didn’t hesitate to get right up in my father’s face. I just knew Franklin was saying something psychotic to my father, but this close to a nervous breakdown myself, I didn’t have it in me to give a shit at the moment.

  My dad’s head snapped to the side to attempt to peer through the dark tint of the windshield in order to seek me out. His lips were pursed into an unhappy frown, and he leaned his body to the side, stretching his arm out toward me pleadingly.

  Too little too late, old man.

  Franklin shoved his way around the grieving man and rushed to the driver’s side door of his wagon. The locks sounded and Franklin damn near threw himself into the driver’s seat. The locks sounded again as soon as his door shut with zero hesitation whatsoever.

  My father’s hand was still stretched out toward me, desperately trying to reach me.

  I put my seatbelt on, closed my eyes, and lay my head back against the headrest. My body immediately began to tremble and shake so badly I felt like I might come apart at the seams.

  I heard Franks start up the wagon and knew he’d put it in reverse, because he wouldn’t want to upset me by running over my father. I’d have to go through this wretched funeral business all over again and it’d mean I’d lose the only real family I had left. Franks wouldn’t put me through all of that.

  We were on the move for all of fifteen se
conds before Franks slammed on the brakes and cursed harshly under his breath. “Motherfucker.”

  My eyes flew open as my hand went out to the dash to stop myself from flying forward. Even with my seatbelt on, it was pure instinct to reach out and potentially save myself from slamming my pretty face on anything.

  Riley stood in the middle of the lane that weaved its way through the cemetery. A lane that was really only wide enough for one car to drive on safely at a time.

  Riley’s arms were crossed over his broad, muscular chest and he looked in danger of being five seconds away from Hulking out and bursting right out of his suit.

  Some insane part of me thought about how much I’d enjoy the view.

  Crazy shit going on in my brain, that was for sure.

  “I swear, this motherfucker is sick in the head and already partially obsessed with you,” Franks snapped in a nasty voice he didn’t often direct my way.

  I didn’t think he was right in his assessment of Riley. I thought Riley felt an immense amount of guilt, and I wore the face of the cause of that guilt. But I couldn’t, no, wouldn’t be the person who helped him with that because he’d earned it his own damn self and consequences were a bitch.

  Instead of getting out of the wagon and going to have a chat with Riley or reversing and maybe turning around, Franks lost his hold on his patience and did the unexpected. Franklin stomped down on the gas and the wagon shot forward.

  Even from this far away, I still picked up Riley’s eyes widening in shock right before he jumped out of the way. My head cranked to the side as we whipped by him and he stumbled, falling forward to land on his knees in the perfectly manicured lawn that butted right up to the lane. Franklin didn’t bother to slow down after he’d tried to run down Riley. Instead, he flew around every curve in the lane and even sometimes drove over the grass like a nut job who’d finally lost his damn mind.

  I guess it was a good thing Riley was an athlete and could move fast, or Franks probably would have really mowed him down.

  Told you, he was a crazy dude.

  Trusting Franklin entirely, I lay my head back and closed my eyes once more. The day wasn’t even halfway over and I was already completely exhausted and emotionally drained.

  “I’m going to the house with you and I’m staying with you tonight,” Franks informed me in a voice that let me know it would be absolutely pointless to argue with him. “If she tries to pull any kind of fucked up shit on you, then we’re gone and that’ll be that, Gem. I don’t care if I have to pick you up and carry you out over my shoulder or drag you out. I know you want to stay there so you can stay in Gin’s room and be close to her, and it’s a miracle that the old hag is actually allowing this to take place under her roof, but I’m not going to sit on my ass and watch her either verbally or physically abuse you. It’s not happening on my watch, and it should never happen at all.”

  I didn’t respond. Mostly because I agreed with everything he’d said, and it felt really good to have someone putting me first and looking out for me. The only person who ever did it was Gin.

  And now Franklin.

  Franks sighed heavily, and I knew he was attempting to shake off his bad mood for my benefit. “You wanna get stoned?” he asked me.

  I did.

  I so totally did.

  More than anything, I wanted something to help block out the pain, and I knew alcohol wouldn’t cut it and would only serve to make me ugly cry. And nobody needed to see that.

  Franks nudged my hand gently and I uncurled my fingers. He placed something in my palm and his hand moved away. “Eat those. You’ll be floating in no time and, bonus, no smell clinging to you so you don’t have to worry about people giving you shit about being stoned off your ass... You think she’ll let people come back to the house?”

  I opened my eyes and stared down at the two shiny, red gummy bears in the palm of my hand that Franks had placed there. Without hesitation, I raised my hand to my mouth and tossed them inside.

  I thought about his question as I chewed the gummies.

  She wouldn’t want people in her house because they’d likely eyeball the front staircase while whispering behind hands that covered their mouths so people couldn’t read their lips. My mother would be judged harshly and found lacking. Still...

  I swallowed and cleared my throat. “Yeah. People were invited back to the house for drinks and mingling. If you can believe that shit. She’s going to socialize and schmooze her way around as if attending some fucking high society party instead of her daughter’s...”

  I slammed my eyes shut and my lips closed. The taste of bitterness filled my mouth. I couldn’t finish that thought.

  I planned on hiding out in Gin’s room for the night and ignoring everything and everyone else. I couldn’t stay in my own room because I didn’t have one in my mother’s house anymore. Gin had told me she’d gotten rid of everything in there the very next day after we’d been kicked out. Of course Gin hadn’t shared this with me until years later when we were together, and she held my hand tightly in hers while I cried about how horrible our mother was.

  I actually looked forward to returning so I could go through my sister’s room. Not to snoop, but to just feel close to her. Of course, I knew which room was hers because it was the same one she’d had before, and she’d sent me pictures of everything all the time so I knew what it looked like now and what all had changed in the years since I’d been gone.

  Franks left me to my own miserable thoughts as he drove the rest of the way to my mother’s house.

  For once, the gate at the end of the long, circular driveway was wide open and inviting.

  I remembered all those years ago standing out there in the dark, my hands gripped tightly to those iron bars, and my face pressed up tight to the bars. My little body shook with sobs as tears streamed down my face and made my vision blurry, but I’d still been able to see the massive house on the hill in the distance. The lights had been on in the house, burning bright, and still no matter how many times my father angrily jabbed at the buzzer, the gate never opened back up and no one came down to speak with him.

  That had been the night she’d kicked us out on our asses, and I hadn’t been back until this morning. And then I’d just dropped off my bag by the foot of the stairs my sister had tumbled to her death down and we’d immediately left for the graveside service right after.

  We were the first to arrive, and I instructed Franks to park the wagon several car lengths ahead of the front door because I knew my mother would be pissed if we parked there. The woman was deranged and would complain about whatever she could find to complain about where I was concerned.

  Franks shut down the wagon and got out. He rounded the hood and was at my door before I’d even reached the handle. I blinked stupidly down at my outstretched hand. I could swear I’d moved faster than that.

  My body felt heavy, but oddly weightless at the same time.

  Hot damn.

  Those edibles had kicked in a whole lot faster than any of the other ones I’d eaten before. Then again, I usually never ate more than one of those puppies at a time because I was smart enough to know my limits. I guessed today, in my grief, I’d lost sight of them. Limits, that was. Everything else was still there to torment me.

  Franks opened the door and leaned in to pick up my bag at my feet. He slung the strap over his shoulder, not embarrassed in the slightest to be standing there wearing my purse.

  “Get out of my ride, Gemmy.” He looked annoyed, but because he was Franks, I knew he wasn’t annoyed with me. He never was. His eyes moved over my face and the annoyance instantly disappeared. “Shit. Those gummies hit you hard already. Let’s get you inside and tucked away safely before people start showing up and you’re forced to interact with anybody. Get out of the car, Gem. Hurry up.”

  I put my hand in his and allowed him to pull me out of the car and on to my feet.

  A car started up the driveway and I snapped out of it. Honestly, I wasn’t surprise
d the black limo was the first vehicle to arrive after us. The parental unit would for sure be wanting a word after what I’m sure they both saw as my bad behavior earlier. Or, more like six thousand, three hundred and eighty-two words, and none of those words being anything I actually wanted to hear in this lifetime or the next.

  I linked my fingers through Franks’ and power walked toward the front door. It wouldn’t do to let them see me run away from them. They’d see it for the weakness it was.

  I hated them both.

  And I knew if I were forced to have a conversation with either of them right now, I’d probably laugh in both their faces.

  The door wasn’t locked and there was no staff standing inside waiting to greet us. I almost called out for one of them to let them know what was imminently coming their way, but I kept my mouth shut because it wasn’t my job to save theirs.

  Ignoring the shiver that rolled through my entire body, I raced up the stairs. I didn’t look down once at the steps themselves as I climbed up each one. I couldn’t do it. As my high heels touched down on each rung, I kept wondering if this was the one her head bounced off of on her way down. There had to be more than one, right?

  Fuck.

  Why was I thinking these morbid thoughts? I couldn’t seem to stop myself and my thoughts got even darker when we reached the top of the stairs. I absolutely did not look behind me and down.

  No fucking way.

  I turned right at the top of the stairs and dragged Franks along behind me as we headed into the east wing of the house.

  My mother, when she stayed here and not at her penthouse in the city with her twenty something boy toy, lived in a suite of rooms far away in the west wing.

  I certainly did not mind her being so far away from me. Briefly, I wondered if my father would be staying in a room close to hers and hoped for his sake that he’d be far away from the venom that came out of that particular snake, because she was absolutely lethal. Just like her vagina, I was sure.