The Real Rebecca

by Anna Carey

  Suddenly Alice said, ‘Oh my God!’

  Cass and I both said, ‘What?’ really loudly.

  ‘Ssssh,’ hissed Alice. ‘You will never guess who’s here. Over there. No, don’t point! To the right, near the bar.’

  Cass and I both looked and then gasped.

  ‘It’s Bike Boy!’ I said.

  ‘Ssssh!’ said Alice.

  ‘Oh, come on,’ I said. ‘He’s on the other side of the room and it’s very noisy. He’s not going to hear me.’

  ‘He might notice us and realise that we’re talking about him,’ said Alice. ‘I can’t believe he’s here.’

  ‘He’s got a bass,’ said Cass. ‘Oooh, he’s looking over here!’

  ‘Stop staring!’ said Alice.

  ‘I think he’s seen us,’ I said.

  ‘Shut up!’ said Alice, edging behind me.

  ‘Alice, if you don’t want him to notice you, maybe you should stop acting so weirdly,’ said Cass. ‘That hissing and skulking isn’t very inconspicuous.’

  Then a woman came on to the stage with a clipboard. She was quite old, about thirty I think, but she was wearing cool clothes and seemed very nice and friendly. She grabbed a microphone from a stand.

  ‘Hey everyone,’ she said. ‘Welcome to the Battle of the Bands! I’m Veronica, one of the organisers, and I’ll be doing the sound for you this afternoon. I know that for a lot of you this is your first gig, so lots of luck – I know you’ll all be brilliant. Now, we just about have time for everyone to do a very short soundcheck – like, half a song – just to make sure we can hear you out here and you can all hear yourselves on stage. If there’s anything that doesn’t sound right when you’re doing your soundcheck, just say something and we’ll change it. We’ve got a fairly basic set-up – most of you are just using one or two microphones, but from the details you gave us when you registered, we know that a few of you need three. So we’ll check you lot first.’ Cass, Alice and I looked at each other in horror. We need three microphones! ‘When I call the name of your band, come up to the stage.’ She looked down at her notes. ‘Okay … first up, it’s The Retreat.’

  Four skinny boys made their way up the stairs at the side of the stage. They didn’t look very happy about being the first band to play anything. I didn’t blame them – I was just glad it wasn’t us. The stage was full of amplifiers and, in the middle, the drum kit. It was on a platform towards the rear of the stage, looking huge and impressive. The boys in The Retreat said a few words to Veronica, and then she and the bloke who had been ticking off names at the door moved some of the microphone stands around. Veronica jumped off the stage and went over to the mixing desk at the back of the venue.

  ‘Okay, boys!’ she said. ‘Let’s hear you.’

  ‘What’ll we do if they’re amazingly brilliant?’ whispered Cass.

  ‘Run away,’ said Alice.

  The band started playing. And to my relief, they weren’t amazingly brilliant. They weren’t terrible either, though. They were fairly good. Not that we got a chance to hear much of them. They played for about a minute and then Veronica’s voice rang out over the speakers.

  ‘That’s great, lads,’ she said. ‘How does it sound to you? Can you hear your vocals in the monitors?’

  One of the boys said he could do with it being a bit louder, so Veronica did some fiddling around on her mixing desk and asked them to try again. They played a few bars and said it was okay.

  ‘Great,’ said Veronica. ‘Thanks, everyone. Now, next up it’s … Hey Dollface.’

  The walk to the stage seemed to take about five years, not least because I was helping Cass carry the keyboard which suddenly felt about five times heavier than usual. I couldn’t help glancing over in Bike Boy’s direction to see if he’d seen us. He had, and looked surprised. We clambered up the stairs and tried to pretend there weren’t loads of people staring at us as we set the keyboard on its stand. The bloke from the door walked over and smiled.

  ‘Hey, I’m Paul,’ he said. ‘So you each need a mike, right?’

  We nodded. I think we were all too scared to speak.

  ‘Okay,’ said Paul. ‘Which of you is the drummer?’

  ‘Me,’ I said, in a tiny little voice.

  ‘Right,’ said Paul. ‘You sit yourself down behind the drums and I’ll get the mike ready for you.’

  So I climbed onto the drum platform. It felt very exposed. I’d been kind of relieved at the idea that I could hide away at the back of the stage. But I hadn’t realised the platform was so high. I felt like everyone was staring at me. Which some of them probably were. Paul moved some mikes around and adjusted the heights of the stands.

  ‘Right,’ he said. ‘That should be fine. Okay, off you go!’

  ‘What song will we do?’ whispered Alice, as she tuned her guitar. She looked terrified.

  ‘The Kinks one,’ said Cass. ‘It’s easier.’

  We all nodded at each other. I was so nervous I was worried my hands were going to start shaking. Then I banged the sticks together and shouted, ‘One, two, three, four!’ And then I hit the tom drum.

  It didn’t sound brilliant, but it sounded okay. At first it felt weird playing a strange drum kit AND singing into a microphone, but it didn’t make too much of a difference. When we all started singing, I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to hear the others’ voices, but I could hear Alice singing perfectly. I wasn’t sure I could hear Cass at all, though. After what seemed like a split second, Veronica interrupted us.

  ‘That sounds good, girls,’ she said. ‘Can you hear yourselves okay?’

  I hated the idea of speaking into the microphone in front of all those people, but I knew I needed to make sure I could hear properly.

  ‘Um, could I hear more of Cass’s singing? I mean the keyboard player.’

  ‘And can I hear more of Rebecca’s voice?’ said Alice. ‘She’s the drummer.’

  ‘Sure,’ said Veronica. She did something to the desk. ‘Okay, try it again.’

  We did, and sure enough I could now hear both Alice and Cass singing perfectly. She didn’t sound half bad.

  ‘Is that okay?’ said Veronica. We looked at each other and nodded again. Maybe we are developing a psychic link with each other. Eventually we won’t have to speak at all.

  ‘It’s fine,’ said Cass.

  ‘Great,’ said Veronica. ‘Okaaay … next up, it’s The Tools.’

  We gathered up our stuff and got off the stage as quickly as we could.

  ‘That wasn’t so bad,’ said Cass.

  ‘I suppose not,’ said Alice. ‘But just think what it’ll be like when we’re doing entire songs in front of a crowd. Including people we know.’

  ‘Including Paperboy,’ I said, feeling a bit sick.

  ‘Including Bike Boy too,’ said Cass.

  ‘Where, where?’ said Alice.

  ‘He’s still over near the bar,’ I said. ‘Oh, I think he’s looking at us. He is!’

  ‘Quick, let’s find somewhere to sit down,’ said Alice.

  ‘Oooh, Alice, you’re bright red,’ said Cass.

  ‘Shut up,’ said Alice, scuttling off. We sat down at a table at the side of the hall. The next band weren’t very good. They were another all-boy four piece and the lead singer was strutting around the stage in a really cocky way, like he was headlining a huge festival, instead of just checking the sound at a small gig. I hoped they weren’t Paperboy’s mates. Then there was a duo who were kind of folksy and a bit boring. After them came a band called Bad Monkey, with three girls and a boy drummer. The girls looked really cool, especially the lead singer. She had a lovely turquoise electric guitar and a great choppy short haircut. They were really good too, much better than the other bands we’d seen so far (including ourselves).

  ‘That’s it, we’re not winning tonight,’ said Cass. ‘They’re the coolest people here.’

  ‘Stop that, Cass,’ said Alice. ‘We’ll be great.’

  We sat there for ages, watching the oth
er bands play snatches of songs. It was really boring, to be honest. Apparently being in a band is not always fun and exciting. It also involves just hanging around big stuffy rooms while other people do things.

  ‘Some people are going out of the venue for a while,’ I said, indicating the boys from The Retreat who were heading out the front door. Another of the bands who’d played earlier was just coming in clutching sandwiches and cans of Coke. ‘Let’s go out and get some fresh air. And maybe some chocolate. We’ve got half an hour before the concert starts, so we’ve got loads of time.’

  ‘You go,’ said Alice. ‘I’ll wait here and guard our stuff.’

  ‘Are you sure?’ said Cass.

  Alice said she was, so Cass and I grabbed our jackets and headed outside. We passed Bike Boy on the way and he raised his hand in greeting. I sort of waved back, and then turned to Cass.

  ‘That’s why she doesn’t want to leave,’ I said. ‘Bike Boy! His band haven’t played yet.’

  ‘So they haven’t,’ said Cass. ‘Hmmm. What do you think? I’d quite like to see what they’re like, but I really want a Dairy Milk.’

  ‘We’ll see what they’re like later,’ I said. ‘Come on, let’s go.’

  It was nice to get out of the dark, stuffy Knitting Factory. We got some sandwiches and chocolate and strolled lazily in the sun back towards the venue.

  ‘Did you ever think, when this term started, that just a few months later we’d be getting ready for our first gig?’ said Cass.

  ‘I really didn’t,’ I said. I threw my bag of sandwiches into the air and caught it again.

  ‘You know, I’m sorry about being so unenthusiastic when we were starting the band,’ said Cass. ‘I was just worried that we’d be crap and it would just be depressing. But we’re not.’

  ‘And even if we were a bit crap,’ I said, ‘which we’re not, of course, I think it would still be fun. Wouldn’t it?’

  ‘Yeah, probably,’ said Cass. ‘Come on, we’d better go back. I don’t think Alice wants to sit there gazing at Bike Boy on her own for too long.’

  So we hurried back into the venue. As soon as we walked into the main part of the venue, we looked at the stage and there was Bike Boy, playing a bass and singing in a rather dramatic and gloomy fashion. We made our way through the crowd to Alice, who was looking at the stage with a strange expression on her face.

  ‘Are you okay?’ I said. ‘We got you a sandwich.’

  ‘Are you looking at him with love or are you wondering why he’s making those weird faces?’ said Cass. ‘And singing in that peculiar booming voice?’

  ‘Hmm,’ said Alice. ‘A bit of both. Maybe. What sandwich did you get me?’

  ‘Egg and bacon,’ I said. ‘What’s his band like?’ Because Bike Boy had stopped playing the bass and singing in a deep voice and had said, ‘Thanks very much,’ to Veronica in his normal one. His band’s soundcheck was over.

  ‘They’re quite good, actually,’ said Alice. ‘But … well, it’s like he’s in a play. He sings as though he was acting a character. It’s quite cool, though, I think. And he’s wearing a great suit!’

  We all looked at Bike Boy with confusion. He did look quite good in the suit. But how did a boy our age have a suit like that?

  ‘Hey,’ said an unfamiliar voice. We looked around and the lead singer of Bad Monkey was smiling at us in a shy way. ‘Just wanted to say it’s nice to see some more girls in the competition. We entered last year and we were the only ones! You sounded good, too.’

  ‘So did you,’ said Cass.

  The girl’s name was Liz and she told us she and the rest of the band went to school together at a mixed school on the southside. She was very nice and said that at last year’s Battle of the Bands they were all so scared that the bass player, Katie, threw up just before they went on stage.

  ‘In the toilet, though,’ she added. ‘Not, like, on the steps.’

  Liz was lovely. She stayed chatting with us for a few minutes (we told her that we’d only been together for just over a month and she seemed pretty impressed) until we heard someone call her name. It was Katie, the pukey bassist. ‘Sorry to interrupt,’ she called. ‘But we need to check a few things.’

  ‘Coming!’ said Liz. She turned back to us. ‘Best of luck!’

  ‘Same to you,’ I said. And off she went to her band. One of them was holding up a guitar and looking worried. I heard her say ‘It just won’t stay in tune …’

  ‘Well, if we win I hope they come second,’ said Cass.

  ‘I think it’ll be the other way round,’ I said. ‘If we’re lucky.’

  The last band (they weren’t bad apart from when the lead singer did a very bad rap in the middle that didn’t really go with the rest of the song) finished their soundcheck and Veronica got up on the stage.

  ‘Okay, everyone,’ she said. ‘You all sound great, and you’ve been very patient. Now, we’re going to open the doors in a minute, but before we do, I just need to tell you that we’ve printed out the running order so you can see when you’re going to be on stage – it’s over there at the sound desk. It’s basically in reverse order to the soundcheck, so if you soundchecked first, you’ll perform last, and the other way around. And the first band – that’s you, Flash Harry – will be on in about twenty minutes. Okay? Best of luck, everyone!’

  ‘Eeek,’ said Cass. ‘This is it.’

  The lights in the main part of the hall dimmed slightly and the lights on the stage got brighter. Even though none of the audience had arrived yet, the atmosphere changed. Everyone looked a bit jittery. The bar opened – it wasn’t selling any alcohol, of course – and people started hanging around it, shakily knocking back soft drinks. I saw one boy surreptitiously take a can of beer out of his bag as the first few members of the audience trickled into the hall.

  Cass and Alice and I just sort of hovered around near our stuff as more and more people came through the doors.

  ‘Oh God, it’s starting to fill up,’ said Alice.

  ‘Ugh, I just wish it would start,’ said Cass. ‘I hate this hanging around.’

  ‘Me too,’ I said. Then I saw some familiar faces in the crowd near the door. ‘Hey, look – it’s Ellie and Emma!’ I waved furiously and they came over.

  ‘Wow, look at you!’ said Emma. ‘You all look very rock and roll.’

  ‘I don’t know if I feel it,’ said Cass.

  ‘Well, as long as we can act it, that’s all that counts,’ said Alice. What has got into her lately? She is a fount of wisdom. Then she froze. ‘Bex, don’t look around, but Vanessa just walked in. Maybe if we don’t move, she won’t see us.’

  But it was too late.

  ‘Rebecca, hi!’ shrieked Vanessa. I risked a glance in the direction of the shriek and saw that she was heading straight towards us with what I could only describe as an entourage. She was, of course, accompanied by Caroline, her faithful sidekick, but she also had two adults who looked like they were in their thirties. They also looked, as Cass said later, ‘haunted. Like they’d witnessed something horrible and unmentionable.’

  ‘Oh my God,’ whispered Cass. ‘Who is that old man? Can he be her boyfriend?’

  ‘Surely not,’ I said. ‘We’d have heard all about that.’ By now Vanessa was upon us. She was wearing a tiny little dress which looked like it had been painted on, and a pair of heels so high I’m amazed she could walk so fast. Quite a contrast to her usual fluffy boots. She was also wearing more make-up than me, Cass and Alice put together.

  ‘How are you?’ she cried, grabbing me and planting air kisses in the general direction of each of my cheeks.

  ‘I’m fine,’ I said. ‘I have to get on a stage and play some songs soon, though, so …’

  But Vanessa, as usual, wasn’t listening.

  ‘Robbie, Sarah, this is my friend Rebecca, the girl I was telling you about,’ she said.

  The man, Robbie, extended a hand. I shook it. ‘Hi, Rebecca, good to meet you,’ he said. He had an English accent.
/>   ‘Hi,’ I said. ‘Um, I think I should tell you …’

  ‘This is Sarah,’ said Vanessa, shoving the woman in my direction.

  ‘Hi, Rebecca, Vanessa has told us all about you,’ said Sarah with a tired smile. ‘She says your mother is the author Rosie Carberry, is that true?’

  ‘Well, yes,’ I said. ‘but …’

  ‘Yeah, I read about her new teen book. That’s great, that’s doing really well. She’s a big name in teen fiction now. And how long have you and Vanessa been friends?’

  ‘We’ve been in the same class since we started secondary school last year,’ I said. ‘But to be honest …’

  Vanessa butted in. ‘I don’t know what I’d do without Becca,’ she said. ‘We’re like sisters, aren’t we, Becca?’

  ‘Becca?’ said Cass.

  ‘And this is Becca’s band,’ Vanessa went on. ‘They’re all going to play at my party.’

  ‘Of course,’ said Robbie. ‘We can’t wait to see you. It sounds like you’re going to be the highlight of Vanessa’s big birthday bash.’

  Cass, Alice and I looked at each other in wonder.

  ‘You’re from the TV show?’ said Alice.

  ‘Yes, we’re the researchers,’ said Sarah. ‘Didn’t Vanessa tell you? We’re over for the weekend, to interview her about her party. It sounds like it’ll be … spectacular.’

  ‘It certainly does,’ said Cass.

  ‘I’ve just ordered a pink crane,’ said Vanessa proudly. ‘I’m going to be lowered into the marquee on a throne.’

  Robbie looked at Sarah. ‘I think I need a drink,’ he said. ‘Do you need a drink?’

  ‘Yes,’ said Sarah fervently. ‘Come on Vanessa, Caroline – we’ll get you a coke. Good luck, girls.’

  ‘See you later, Becca!’ said Vanessa, and they all marched off. The rest of us just stared at each other.

  ‘I don’t believe it,’ I said. ‘I don’t believe after everything I said, she’s actually told a TV company that I’m her best mate and that we’re going to play at her ridiculous party.’