The Truth We Chase

by Carl Richards

  One night, I had stayed behind in Manhattan after work to have a few drinks and a meal with a friend who was visiting New York. After we parted I took the ferry back across to Gairville. It only took seven minutes, as did the walk from the pier back to my apartment. On the route back home, I passed by the front doors of the theatre just as Ana was leaving for the day.

  As she looked up our eyes met and with a warm smile, she greeted me with a softly spoken ‘Hi.’ I stopped and we exchange small talk about our day. It had been a long day for her, all in all, fourteen hours, with travelling, working, plus two more hours travelling alone on public transport ahead of her.

  I probably overstepped the mark with what I did next, but at the time it felt like the right thing to do; I invited her back to my apartment, I didn’t like the idea of her travelling alone at this time of night and because of my feelings for Ana, my natural reaction is to be protective of her.

  She looked nervous with that suggestion and her smile had gone.

  ‘I’m sorry’ I said as I realised that I had made her feel uncomfortable, ‘I just thought I could call you a cab or something, rather than...’ I stopped mid-sentence. Normally I’m in control of my emotions and my mouth, but my feelings about Ana had left me on the back foot.

  By now she was staring at the floor, I quickly grabbed a pen and scrap of paper from the inside of my suit jacket and hastily wrote my name, address, and phone number on it before offering it to her.

  She looked up, I spluttered out another apology. ‘I am genuinely so sorry; I didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable. Here are my details, if, in the future you might want to grab a meal after work or a drink or...’ again I had to stop myself.

  The smile returned to her face, she took the scrap of paper from my hand and after a glance at the details, she casually responded, ‘maybe, I’ll check my diary.’

  ‘Great, I look forward to it!’ I said, more in hope than anything else. ‘Have a safe journey home, and I’ll see you in the morning, same time, same place?’

  ‘Yeah, and maybe you will treat me to breakfast?’ She said with a wry smile.

  The following morning wouldn’t come quick enough, when it eventually did it was a good one. It had been a while since I‘d woken up so happy. The feeling of having someone so beautiful in my life, someone who is so full of positivity coupled with an incredible sense of humour and intelligence is inspiring and uplifting. As I’d found out throughout the last year, you can very quickly become low and isolated, even in a city of eight million people.

  The following morning, I got to the coffee shop early and managed to get a table next to the window. I ordered a coffee from the waiter and asked for more time to view the menu, despite knowing every item on it. I needed the extra time to see if Ana would turn up.

  The coffee duly arrived. Warm moist air from the mug and the coolness of the air that surrounded it created vapour that caught the sunlight streaming down the side street and through the window. I gazed beyond it into the street with its cobbles set around railroad tracks that served as a reminder of a time when this had been a bustling warehouse and port area.

  I was lost in my thoughts when suddenly, a beautiful Brazilian woman appeared on the other side of the window, it was Ana. As she caught my eye, she playfully stuck her tongue out at me, followed up with a smile that could warm the coldest heart. All the awkwardness and embarrassment from the night before melted away in seconds.

  We had just over an hour together before work beckoned for us both. I had a meeting in City Hall over in Lower Manhattan and decided to do the thirty-minute walk across the Brooklyn Bridge. There were two very distinct advantages, the first, I got to walk with Ana as her workplace was on the route and second, I got to walk off the enormous breakfast.

  The walk from the coffee shop to the theatre was over all too soon, we said our goodbyes and went our separate ways for the day.

  The hustle and bustle of the daily commute, the noise, the intensity of droves of thousands of people, none of it were to register on that day. As the early morning sun climbed higher, I felt the warmth on my face as I emerged from the steps on to the pedestrian walkway of the bridge and for the first time in a while, all is well in the world.

  My meeting ended at lunchtime, I switched my phone back on as I left City Hall and almost immediately, I received a voicemail notification. I dialled in hoping it is a message from Ana, although in my heart I was sure it would only be work checking on the outcome of the meeting. I wasn’t disappointed, I should have been more optimistic as it was a call from Ana, she had rung to take me up on my offer of a few drinks after work, and, to check if it was okay to bring her friend Luciana.

  I now had a problem, not with Ana bringing her friend there was no problem with that, the problem is, I didn’t have a number to contact her back on. Unfortunately, as my phone was off at the time there was no missed call in the log and no number left in the message.

  I quickly doubled back into the reception at City Hall and asked if they could call Directory Assistance for the theatre number, which they did.

  I was so grateful to the reception staff as I was pushed for time, crossing the East River back to Brooklyn was not an option as I needed to be midtown in just over half an hour for a site visit to a new hotel under construction just west of Times Square.

  I tried to call the theatre on the walk to the subway, but the density and height of the downtown Manhattan buildings made cell phone signals patchy. I decided to leave it until I was on site.

  After a ten-minute subway ride and a five-minute walk, I arrived at the site, still, I had no signal on my phone and my frustration was starting to build.

  The site visit was linked to the City Hall meeting I’ve just come out of. There have been one or two problems, which always happens when you’re trying to build a forty-five-storey building in one of the busiest, most densely packed square miles in the world.

  On site I met Rudy the Construction Manager. Rudy is a formidable native New Yorker, tough, straight talking and big. When I say big, I mean big. He was as wide as he was tall, okay a slight exaggeration but still, he made me, at six foot two inches look small.

  Today’s site meeting was supposed to be at street level but I needed to be higher up, not only for a better phone signal but also to get the benefit of a cooling breeze off the Hudson River to ease the intensity of the early afternoon heat. Donning a hard hat, I asked to see for myself how things were going. Rudy was more than happy to oblige. We made our way up to the 22nd floor. The journey in a cage lift on the outside of the building is not for the faint-hearted, although that said, it offered stunning views and that welcome breeze.

  On arrival at the top level we found the construction crew had taken an impromptu break thinking their boss was on the ground floor having a meeting with me! Rudy marched over to the far side of the building to confront the gang of workers, I took the opportunity to make the call to Ana.

  I made my way to the South Eastern corner of the building overlooking West 42nd Street and took time to admire the view of The Empire State Building, still, after all these years, my favourite building in Manhattan, perfectly framed in the distance between the midtown skyscrapers.

  A great sense of relief washed over me as I brought my phone out of stand-by and found it to have a full signal. Finally, I could make the call. After a couple of redirects at the theatre I got to speak to Ana.

  We didn’t have much time to chat, so after a few pleasantries we quickly moved on to our meet-up, we decided on pizza and few beers which suited me, after all, this had all the hallmarks of it being a social, rather than a date night. I suggested a few drinks at my place before making our way to the pizzeria, and, as I was only a few minutes from Ana’s theatre, we agreed and set a time.

  Rudy reached me just as I finished the call. I immediately apologised for bringing him up here, only for him to have this added aggravation. Luckily for me he didn’t see it as aggravation but as part of his job. T
he meeting concluded quickly, projects like this with a Construction Managers like Rudy were a dream.

  Now back at street level, I re-joined the human zoo. The street was busy and as I approach Times Square, the crowds, the heat, the traffic, the sirens, the fumes and the ducking and diving through the tourists all intensified. All that was left for me to do, was to negotiate four lanes of a seemingly endless flow of traffic to reach the 42nd Street/Bryant Park Subway to ride the F train home.

  After a half-hour subway journey and a short walk, I was back home. I practically fall through the door of my apartment. New York is an exhilarating place to live, but often it left me feeling drained physically and mentally, exhausted and overwhelmed.

  I shut the door behind me, first things first, on went the air conditioning, then a trip to the refrigerator for a cold beer before collapsing on to the sofa. It was so nice to be back in my little oasis of calm; I closed my eyes and held the ice-cold tin of beer against my forehead. The air conditioning was playing catch up and had ramped itself up to full power, as it did, I was hit by a wave of cold air; sharp, cold, fresh air, cutting its way through the hot airless apartment.

  I opened my eyes again and gazed back across the East River towards the Manhattan skyline, partially framed by the Brooklyn and Manhattan Bridges, both starting, or ending, depending on your view, on either side of my apartment block.

  I knew my time here had run out. The apartment is owned by the father of my ex-girlfriend Mia, not only is he her father, but he is also my boss. Mia had been the reason I had come to the States in the first place. We had met back in Manchester whilst she was studying at the University. I still remember how euphoric I felt the day my immigration application was approved to coincide with Mia’s return to America. A career awaited me in her father’s Corporation plus a dream apartment in one of the most amazing cities in the world, it had been almost too big a concept to comprehend.

  Mia’s father, Marco, quickly grew to like me. He saw me as loyal, dependable with moral integrity, bold and confident both in my relationship with his daughter and within his organisation. Everything he had ever wanted for Mia.

  Mia also wanted all of that – but, unfortunately for me, she wanted all of that in a famous six-foot four-inch American Football player up in Minnesota.

  Luckily for me, my friendship with her father was destined to last longer than the relationship with his daughter.

  Chapter 3

  There was no more time left for slouching, I needed to shower and wash the city grime off me and start to prepare for the night ahead.

  Ana and Luciana arrived just after six-thirty, once in the apartment I lost them to the view, seduced by the changing light as the late afternoon sunset. Daylight became twilight that became dusk and then by night the natural light is replaced by the lights of the city dancing on the river captured perfectly by the three oversized windows that framed the Manhattan skyline.

  On their arrival it hadn’t taken me long to realise that Luciana was the more dominant of the two of them and, that she had no concept of personal space! She is feisty, confident, self-assured, but not arrogant, I was sure we’d get on well and looked forward to getting to know her better, although it was Ana that I had feelings for.

  The night had gone well, the three of us had a good rapport, probably helped by the drink, so much so that we decided to call time on going out for food and ordered a Chinese instead. After eating came the dancing, when I say dancing, I mean Ana and Luciana were dancing, trying to teach me a variety of different Latin and South American styles, inevitably it quickly descended into farce as my stiff Englishness met sensual Sudamérica dance. Eventually, after recovering from the hysterical laughter that ensued throughout my impromptu dance lesson, we kicked back and crashed out on the sofa.

  We had been talking for hours, covering a whole range of topics before the getting to know you late night conversation.

  ‘I don’t get it...’ Luciana was first to dig deeper into who I am. She stood up, walked to the window in the far corner of the room and gazed out onto the Brooklyn Bridge and beyond to lower Manhattan before turning around and sitting back down at my side.

  ‘What don’t you get, Luciana?’ I asked

  ‘Any of it... I don’t get why you are single for starters... that is if you are single?’

  I laughed. ‘Oh yes, I am most definitely single!’

  Luciana still had a suspicious look on her face. ‘So, you’ve come all the way from England and you’re obviously successful, you’re smart; you’re funny; Ana tells me that you are very encouraging when she talks about her aspirations; you’re considerate, reliable... and single, you’re way too good to be true!’

  ‘What can I say? I’m just no good at relationships.’

  Luciana is confused. ‘What makes you think you’re no good at relationships?’

  I shrugged my shoulders. ‘I’ve only had two and they’ve both crashed and burned so I must be doing something wrong. My first relationship was with a girl from school, that lasted until we were nineteen when we split up because I wanted to settle down, we were just too young. The second was with Mia, she is from Brooklyn; she was studying in England when I met her, after her studies, we came back here together and although the relationship was fun, a lot of fun, I don’t think either of us expected it to last a lifetime and it didn’t. So, there we have it, I’m single again.’

  ‘So, what are you looking for in a relationship?’ Luciana asked.

  I look directly at Ana. I get the feeling that I’m more into Ana than she is into me, Ana looks at Luciana who looks more into me, than I am into her.

  ‘So?’ Luciana asked again.

  ‘I guess I want someone who is feminine, sensual, loving but who is also strong and can hold her own, someone who will be equally comfortable having a cosy night in, as they are going out for a few beers and going to the Ice Hockey...’

  Luciana interrupts. ‘Please don’t tell me you’re a Rangers fan?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘An Islanders fan?’

  ‘Absolutely not!’

  ‘Devils?’ She asks tentatively.

  ‘There we go, you’ve got it!’

  ‘Favourite player?’

  ‘Martin Brodeur.’

  Luciana high fives me before standing up and doing a little dance in the middle of the room.

  ‘You and me, mister, are going to get along just fine!’

  My attention turns to Ana. We’ve had many breakfast time conversations in the coffee shop and she’s always very guarded about her personal life, tonight wasn’t going to be any different, in fact, the only information I managed to get from her was that she was born in Brazil, her family had moved to the States when she was a baby, that she had met Luciana at school and had been best friends ever since. Luciana, on the other hand, is the opposite; she can’t wait to tell me all about herself. She starts by telling me that she is of Venezuelan descent, born and raised in the Ironbound section, but by the end of the conversation I know just about everything I could possibly wish to know about her, I even know what shoe size she is!

  One thing Luciana said, that grabbed my attention, is that she and Ana were thinking of getting a house share together as they had both been priced out of the New York and New Jersey property markets. Jokingly, I suggested that three people sharing would make it even more affordable; by the time we’d finished talking about it, the joke started to look more like a reality.

  It was late, Ana and Luciana both took me up on my offer for them to stay over. They used the bathroom first to get ready for bed, then, when I heard the light switch click, I knew they’d finished. I got up off my bed and made my way to the bathroom just as Ana was on her way back. She was wearing a long white t-shirt that just about covered everything it needed to. As we met she gave me a seductive look, then, after we’ve passed each other we both instinctively turned around in unison, we’ve barely taken our eyes off each other, I am overwhelmed with desire for her and it
shows; Ana is more subtle, she knows she can have me anytime she likes, but at the moment there are three of us in this relationship.

  Once in the bathroom I reflect on how different tonight could have been if it had just been Ana and myself. I lean on the sink and take a good long look at myself in the mirror, then I say out loud, ‘come on, who wouldn’t want me; six foot two, toned athletic body, jet black hair, piercing crystal blue eyes, a wicked sense of humour!’ Even I don’t know why I’m single.

  As I brush my teeth, I laugh at myself and my own little pep talk.

  The next day we started with breakfast at the coffee shop before going our separate ways. As the three of us parted company I thought once more about the house share, it had been on my mind all night, all through breakfast, and, whilst financially I didn’t need to share, I do miss having people around.

  Monday morning came around all too quickly and we slipped back into the old routine of breakfast, work and then, over the following weeks, the occasional meet up. It wasn’t long before I started to spend more and more time over in the Ironbound. I met Ana’s family, at first, I was a little concerned that I might struggle to fit in, especially with her three older Brothers. The eldest two certainly have a reputation in the neighbourhood, gaining their approval would mean that I’d be accepted in the wider community. Luckily for me, we all hit it off.

  Then one day it happened, I’ll always remember the night; the ninth of November. Ana, her Brother João, Luciana and myself were at the Continental Airlines Arena watching the Ice Hockey, when Luciana, in her usual tactful way turned to me and said ‘so are you moving in with us or not?’ I turned to Ana, then back to Luciana and then turned my gaze straight down to the ice, ‘might do’ was my response, this was met with a barrage of friendly slaps from both of them. ‘Okay, okay when and where do I sign?’ Pretending to be under duress. ‘Friday, I’ll give you details of the real estate office later’ said Luciana.